Is your D&D game a battle of DM versus players? Or do you prefer a collaborative relationship over an adversarial one?
Before I dig into this, let me be clear: the best style of play is whatever your group prefers. I’m not here to tell you your fun is wrong. If everyone is enjoying the game, that’s the only thing that matters!
However, I know a lot of people who had unpleasant experiences with DMs who came to the table and gleefully announced their intention to shoot for a TPK. In other cases, the DM wasn’t that aggressive, but enjoyed running a world in which the players felt they didn’t have much agency and characters existed mostly as pawns in the DM’s story. If your group isn’t that into roleplay, it can work.
I support a more collaborative approach for groups that enjoy lots of roleplay, so the whole group tells the story. Long campaigns especially benefit from this approach. The DM still has plenty of control, but involves the players heavily so their characters affect the story instead of merely walking through activities. It works best when all the players are onboard with this approach, so everyone has a little breathing room for character exploration. Personally, I like playing in a game where I’m a fan of the other characters and am excited to see what they do even when my character isn’t there.
This method does require a bit more preparation outside the game, for DM and players alike. But it’s fun! When you’re collaborating with someone, it’s a bit like getting some extra play time.
The main campaign I’m playing in currently has five regular PCs: a well-adjusted barbarian, an arcane archer/professional prizefighter in a wrestling-style kirin mask, and three enormous drama llamas (one of which is my character). It’s a nice balance because everyone has goals and desires as individuals and as a group, but not everyone is in a pit of existential horror all the time. We’ve formed an interesting unit, and can help each other with various problems.
This campaign is RP-intensive, so our DM works with each of us separately from time to time to find out what our characters are feeling, what they hope to accomplish in the short-term and long-term, etc. He consistently requests feedback, and always is receptive to emails about character business between games. It’s nice knowing that he’s interested in what we want, both as players and characters, and we see these conversations bear fruit in the game.
Over time, I’ve learned to trust him with that information. This trust is crucial. I wouldn’t feel as comfortable getting so deep into roleplay in a game where the DM only intended to use personal insight to torture the characters. In this case, we know he cares about us players as people. He’s definitely going to use that information to fuel drama. That’s part of the job. But there’s a difference between being ruthless and being careless. He maintains a good sense of each player’s threshold for fictional pain, which is important and keeps it fun -- even when we’re crying or having in-character nightmares in real life.
(That actually happened last week. I had my character’s nightmare. I mentioned this while hanging out with my game group and our DM was perhaps a little too excited to get all the details. I take it as proof that the game is going well though. It’s gotten under my skin enough that my brain is still playing when I’m asleep! That’s amazing! But if you don’t want to get quite that intense, that’s okay too.)
Yet another benefit: a collaborative approach bleeds over into the way players interact with each other. When you spend enough time delving into characters, you might end up having in-character, out-of-game conversations like I talked about a few weeks ago.
I don’t mean to suggest that DMs should soften all the edges and make every session a picnic at Hugs and Puppies National Park...unless that’s what you all want, of course. You can fill your game with plenty of dramatic tension and thrills, but balance it with opportunities for characters to stop and have feelings. Then it will actually make an impact when the DM occasionally springs a major trap. They get the joy of watching players freak out in a truly meaningful way, and players get the rush from that emotional rollercoaster. If that sounds good to you, try it! It’s well worth the effort.
This article was contributed by Annie Bulloch as part of ENWorld's User-Generated Content (UGC) program. We are always on the lookout for freelance columnists! If you have a pitch, please contact us!
Before I dig into this, let me be clear: the best style of play is whatever your group prefers. I’m not here to tell you your fun is wrong. If everyone is enjoying the game, that’s the only thing that matters!
However, I know a lot of people who had unpleasant experiences with DMs who came to the table and gleefully announced their intention to shoot for a TPK. In other cases, the DM wasn’t that aggressive, but enjoyed running a world in which the players felt they didn’t have much agency and characters existed mostly as pawns in the DM’s story. If your group isn’t that into roleplay, it can work.
I support a more collaborative approach for groups that enjoy lots of roleplay, so the whole group tells the story. Long campaigns especially benefit from this approach. The DM still has plenty of control, but involves the players heavily so their characters affect the story instead of merely walking through activities. It works best when all the players are onboard with this approach, so everyone has a little breathing room for character exploration. Personally, I like playing in a game where I’m a fan of the other characters and am excited to see what they do even when my character isn’t there.
This method does require a bit more preparation outside the game, for DM and players alike. But it’s fun! When you’re collaborating with someone, it’s a bit like getting some extra play time.
The main campaign I’m playing in currently has five regular PCs: a well-adjusted barbarian, an arcane archer/professional prizefighter in a wrestling-style kirin mask, and three enormous drama llamas (one of which is my character). It’s a nice balance because everyone has goals and desires as individuals and as a group, but not everyone is in a pit of existential horror all the time. We’ve formed an interesting unit, and can help each other with various problems.
This campaign is RP-intensive, so our DM works with each of us separately from time to time to find out what our characters are feeling, what they hope to accomplish in the short-term and long-term, etc. He consistently requests feedback, and always is receptive to emails about character business between games. It’s nice knowing that he’s interested in what we want, both as players and characters, and we see these conversations bear fruit in the game.
Over time, I’ve learned to trust him with that information. This trust is crucial. I wouldn’t feel as comfortable getting so deep into roleplay in a game where the DM only intended to use personal insight to torture the characters. In this case, we know he cares about us players as people. He’s definitely going to use that information to fuel drama. That’s part of the job. But there’s a difference between being ruthless and being careless. He maintains a good sense of each player’s threshold for fictional pain, which is important and keeps it fun -- even when we’re crying or having in-character nightmares in real life.
(That actually happened last week. I had my character’s nightmare. I mentioned this while hanging out with my game group and our DM was perhaps a little too excited to get all the details. I take it as proof that the game is going well though. It’s gotten under my skin enough that my brain is still playing when I’m asleep! That’s amazing! But if you don’t want to get quite that intense, that’s okay too.)
Yet another benefit: a collaborative approach bleeds over into the way players interact with each other. When you spend enough time delving into characters, you might end up having in-character, out-of-game conversations like I talked about a few weeks ago.
I don’t mean to suggest that DMs should soften all the edges and make every session a picnic at Hugs and Puppies National Park...unless that’s what you all want, of course. You can fill your game with plenty of dramatic tension and thrills, but balance it with opportunities for characters to stop and have feelings. Then it will actually make an impact when the DM occasionally springs a major trap. They get the joy of watching players freak out in a truly meaningful way, and players get the rush from that emotional rollercoaster. If that sounds good to you, try it! It’s well worth the effort.
This article was contributed by Annie Bulloch as part of ENWorld's User-Generated Content (UGC) program. We are always on the lookout for freelance columnists! If you have a pitch, please contact us!
