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Old 23rd July 2009, 07:27 AM   #1 (permalink)
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Humor: Some of the funniest things read on the Net...

This is a thread devoted to letting people know about some of the funniest things they've ever read on the Net.

Here are 2 of my faves:

Texas Chilli Cookoff:
Texas Chili Cookoff Joke

Scylla's Horror of Blimps:
The horror of blimps - Straight Dope Message Board
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Old 13th August 2009, 05:20 PM   #2 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Dannyalcatraz View Post
This is a thread devoted to letting people know about some of the funniest things they've ever read on the Net.

Here are 2 of my faves:

Texas Chilli Cookoff:
Texas Chili Cookoff Joke

Scylla's Horror of Blimps:
The horror of blimps - Straight Dope Message Board
Thanks!
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Old 16th August 2009, 07:26 AM   #3 (permalink)
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Dihydrogen Monoxide Research Division - dihydrogen monoxide info

Which reports the dangers of dihydrogen monoxide in exhaustive detail.
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Old 16th August 2009, 07:31 AM   #4 (permalink)
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Those sites (I followed some of the links) are brilliant!
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"Deathless" = "Undead," end of story

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Old 17th August 2009, 05:59 AM   #5 (permalink)
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The fact that they never use the common term for the compound leads to statements like this:

Quote:
Quantities of dihydrogen monoxide have been found in almost every stream, lake, and reservoir in America today. But the pollution is global, and the contaminant has even been found in Antarctic ice.
lolz
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Old 17th August 2009, 08:45 PM   #6 (permalink)
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Originally Posted by Orius View Post
Dihydrogen Monoxide Research Division - dihydrogen monoxide info

Which reports the dangers of dihydrogen monoxide in exhaustive detail.
Brilliant. I gave this link to a friend that took chemistry as one of his primary classes in high school. He came back to me after a while, asking if there was some hoax to it.
Shockingly enough, he didn't bother to actually understand what dihydrogen monoxide meant, not catching it despite his chemistry background...

If it could have fooled him...
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Old 17th August 2009, 10:34 PM   #7 (permalink)
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Zombo.com
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Old 17th August 2009, 11:57 PM   #8 (permalink)
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Shockingly enough, he didn't bother to actually understand what dihydrogen monoxide meant, not catching it despite his chemistry background...
Either he needs to surrender his degree or he needs to watch more comedy!
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"Deathless" = "Undead," end of story

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Old 18th August 2009, 12:43 AM   #9 (permalink)
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I was just doing a little search for some info, and I found out that somebody quoted one of my one-liners from a chat log...and it was funny enough, I thought I'd share it here.

Quote:
Dannyalcatraz: Ron Jeremy was a hack...he always played the same role, no matter the movie: A horny shaggy dog. He never even took off his sweater...
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"Deathless" = "Undead," end of story

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Old 18th August 2009, 07:41 AM   #10 (permalink)
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That was funny.

Speaking of actors:

I Will Always Have Been Back: Toward a Grand Unified Theory of Schwarzenegger | Overthinking It
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Old 18th August 2009, 07:45 AM   #11 (permalink)
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That made me laugh...the Moorcockian theory of Schwarzenegger!
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"Deathless" = "Undead," end of story

"I have the keys to Paradise, but I have too many legs!" -Jeff, from Coupling (BBC Series).

"Quando Omni Flunkus Moritati" -motto of the Possum Club, Red Green show.


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Old 19th August 2009, 06:07 AM   #12 (permalink)
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The Budget I put this link up because for two reasons:
1) It's a crappy template website (nothing about it reads "news paper*" and thus it's funny from a web design perspective).
2) It's A WEBSITE FOR AN AMISH NEWSPAPER!




* I should mention that the reason why this newspaper's site has no news on it is because the writers went on strike fearing that their "plain spoken" writing style would be ridiculed on the net. The paper caved in and took all the stories offline. This of course failed to mention the fact that the internet is the antithesis of the Amish/Mennonite lifestyle..
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Old 19th August 2009, 07:24 AM   #13 (permalink)
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OK, that is intrinsically hilarious!

Its good to know that the buttons at the site still function, so they won't have to go to zippers. *ba-DUM-bum-craaaaaaasssssshhhh*

And in a related note...
Why don't amish use zippers? - Yahoo! Answers

Note how the link to the online Amish forum didn't work. Imagine that!
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"Deathless" = "Undead," end of story

"I have the keys to Paradise, but I have too many legs!" -Jeff, from Coupling (BBC Series).

"Quando Omni Flunkus Moritati" -motto of the Possum Club, Red Green show.


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Old 19th August 2009, 08:12 AM   #14 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Relique du Madde View Post
The Budget I put this link up because for two reasons:
1) It's a crappy template website (nothing about it reads "news paper*" and thus it's funny from a web design perspective).
2) It's A WEBSITE FOR AN AMISH NEWSPAPER!
Amusing you mention that, I was reading about that thing in the paper earlier.

Amish newspaper succeeds the old-fashioned way by AP: Yahoo! Tech

Why would they even bother having a website? Who's going to read it? The Amish sure aren't, and how many outsiders really care about that barn Ezekiel put up last week?

*glances at sidebar*

Well, I shouldn't make too much fun of the Amish, at least by shunning the internet, they aren't getting bombarded with Evony ads!
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Old 19th August 2009, 08:15 AM   #15 (permalink)
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I wouldn't be too sure about that...

From what I understand, the company has hired buxom young women to stand by the side of the roads that lead to the farms and shout out Evony slogans in order to corner the market on Amish computer gamers!
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"Deathless" = "Undead," end of story

"I have the keys to Paradise, but I have too many legs!" -Jeff, from Coupling (BBC Series).

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Old 19th August 2009, 11:11 AM   #16 (permalink)
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Either he needs to surrender his degree or he needs to watch more comedy!
High School (German Gynmanisum), not University.
I think his degree in computer sciences is safe.

Considering how terrible his orthography is, I still sometimes wonder...
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Old 19th August 2009, 12:02 PM   #17 (permalink)
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Originally Posted by Mustrum_Ridcully View Post
High School (German Gynmanisum), not University.
I think his degree in computer sciences is safe.

Considering how terrible his orthography is, I still sometimes wonder...
Mustrum, you forget that the average German High School graduate's education is higher then the average student in the US.
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Old 19th August 2009, 01:34 PM   #18 (permalink)
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Originally Posted by Relique du Madde View Post
Mustrum, you forget that the average German High School graduate's education is higher then the average student in the US.
Well, according to Wikipedia, High School ranges from our "Hauptschule" to "Gymnasium" in education levels, so it is hard to compare. Basically, if a High School student took mostly advanced courses, he should be en par with the Gymnasium, if he did took mostly easy courses, he would probably have an education en par with the "Hauptschule" education.

Of course, that's all very fluid, since both the US and Germany have a lot of tolerance in actual difficulty and depth of education for the individual schools.

To be more correct, I'd probably should say my friend took AP courses in Chemistry (and mathematics, where it was physical sciences and mathematics for me) in his final 2 years in school.
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Old 22nd August 2009, 08:10 AM   #19 (permalink)
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Pretty much anything on The Onion.

Seriously, how come none of us mentioned this yet?
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Old 22nd August 2009, 09:11 AM   #20 (permalink)
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I eat onions, not read them.
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