arscott
First Post
A day in the world of Dark•Matter
Completely failing to learn the lessons of Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade, the nazi remnants from the Odessa Project are searching for the holy grail. And for some reason, they're searching in Norway.
Fortunately, the dedicated agents of the Hoffmann Institute are there to stop him. They locate the Nazi camp easily. Getting someone inside is slightly more difficult. Dr. Akens, the only team member that speaks german, is decidedly non-Aryan.
Fortunately, the group's telepath/faceman manages to rig a psychic link with the local guide, and aquires the ability to speak german for the duration. This gives them just enough time to sabotage one of the Nazi hovercraft before the rest of them take off into the arctic ocean.
Since the Hoffmann Institue was being thoughless and failed to provide water transportation, the agents then un-sabatoged the hovercraft and took off after the Nazis. One of the remaining hovercraft broke off from the rest to engage the agents, but after a battle involving many more grenades than a covert investigative agency should ever be using, the agents triumphed and made their way to the Nazi's destination.
An egyptian-style pyramid, rising out of the middle of the arctic ocean.
-----And then there was summer vacation-----
After a brief encounter with the nazi snipers left to guard the boats, the Hoffmann Agents dealt with a series of traps shamelessly stolen from a Basic D&D module, and then made their way into the winding depths of the pyramid--taking a different entrance than the Nazis did.
Judging by the high ceilings, odd furniture, and assorted bits of art, this pyramid was inhabited by creatures a bit larger and a bit less mammilian than humans. Much attention was paid to a set of quartz crystals that turned out to be simply decorative objects. Much attention was paid to the rather unorthodox (and alchemically based) refridgerator. Surprisingly little attention was paid to the human body undergoing a mummification process. It was discovered that "Keeper of the Sacred Altar" is closer to "Church Janitor" than "High Priest". Also, the sacred altar is clearly not designed for human sarcifice because there's no place for the blood to drain.
Some attention was also paid to things that were actually important to the plot--A series of murals explained the founding of the Order of Hermes and the creation of a set of three artifacts--The Cup, The Spear, and the Grey Device. A second set of murals showed the distruction of the grey device and the brutal war that followed.
Finally, they find the actual inhabitants of the pyramid--dinosaur men called the Kinori stand guard at the pyramid's other entrance. Their leader, an alchemist with black scales, is confounding the Nazi searchers by using his illusion powers to mask the doorway into the next room. The second-in-command is willing to talk to the one agent capable of understanding ancient egyptian.
The agents are referred to using a word that means "Small ones" or "Small things", but can also mean "Snacks". There is much discussion of this out of character, though the translator avoids mentioning this in his translation. "There was once an alliance between our two peoples" is vetoed as a conversation topic, given how that particular alliance ended. A much more comfortable "The enemy of my enemy is my friend" is settled upon, and the Agents and Kinori prepare to make war upon the Nazis.
-----And then it was time for Garrett to watch Desparate Housewives, and anyway, it was a school night---
War is made upon the Nazis. Between concussion grenades, white phosphorus grenades, and knockout gas, there are very few nazis left to be taken out by gunfire and kinori spears. The party is not made aware of the foolishness of using gas weapons in an enclosed environment because the Nazi commander is gunned down before he can enact his really awesome plan.
The entirely expected betrayal of the agents by the kinori takes place. The Blackscale Kinori bemoans his inability to use his 6HD or less sleep spell on the level 7 party. He also bemoans his ability to use his Trick talent on those members of the party that don't speak ancient egyptian. Finally, he bemoans the fact that the in order to get the sleep spell and the trick talent, he had to take levels of classes that gave him only d6 HD.
The Kinori Warriors are a bit more resilient. It is especially unfortunate that they have fire resistance, as it really reduces the effectiveness of the WP Grenades, the WP Ammo, and the Celestial Fire elemental that Dr. Akens summoned. They also manage to smash the techie's cool micro-tank.
The mummies have fire vulnerability, but their resistance against normal weapons more than makes up for it. Perhaps if they'd actually hit anything that was capable of failing a reflex save against their mummy rot, they would have been a threat. Finally, in the last round of combat, the Agent Mason contracted the disease.
The Hoffmann agents emerge victorious, with enough in the way of kinori prisoners that they could locate the grail, but not enough kinori prisoners to shift the half-ton block of stone that sits on top of it. After some lamenting that the Plan talent doesnt' affect ability checks, I am nice and let people aid another on a take-20.
The holy grail looks less like a cup and more like a vaguely cup-shaped machine. The agents wonder aloud what horrible things would befall them should they touch it. Smith becomes sick of the bickering and cowardice and touches the thing.
Before we continue, you should know a little bit more about Agent Smith. Anderson Smith started out as a fairly normal Ex-FBI investigator type. Then, on a vacation to the tropics between adventures, he was bitten by an odd purple lizard. The lizard's genetic material reacted to an already-existing instability in Smith's DNA, and cause him to develop lizard-like traits over the next few months--He's got natural armor, chameleon skin, a climb spead, and a host of other minor mutations (positive and negative). He'd been trying to hide this from the party (via very bulky clothing and invisible-man style face bandages), but without much success. His being half-lizard, half-mummy inspired some jokes during the conversation with the kinori.
See, the thing is, Smith's mutation is very clearly a disease. And he just touched the most powerful healing device on the planet. So in a spur-of-the-moment rat-bastard DM decision, I say that there is a flash of light and all of his mutations go away. There are more grail touchings and more flashes of light. Agent Mason is cured of mummy rot. Dr. Akens's aging penalties go away (but his ability scores were mostly even, so it does him very little good). One of the agents, unaware that he was developing cancer, is unaware that his cancer was cured.
After carting the grail (and the alchemical stone that kept the Kinori's meat cold) out of the pyramid, they call up the Hoffmann Institute. Director Nakami is personally interested in this case, and arrives ten minutes later in his office/UFO.
He thanks the agents, remarking that "The grail could be a danger if it had fallen into the hands of the Nazis, or anyone else for that matter". Dr. Neary questions that statement, and Nakami amends it to "anyone else besides the Hoffmann institute".
Dr. Neary remarks that it wouldn't be so bad if King Arthur found it. Nakami replies "Well, clearly, you didn't know King Arthur."
The question "Did you?" isn't answered to anyone's satisfaction.
-----Who knows what sort of mischeif our intepid investigators will be up to next week...-----
Completely failing to learn the lessons of Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade, the nazi remnants from the Odessa Project are searching for the holy grail. And for some reason, they're searching in Norway.
Fortunately, the dedicated agents of the Hoffmann Institute are there to stop him. They locate the Nazi camp easily. Getting someone inside is slightly more difficult. Dr. Akens, the only team member that speaks german, is decidedly non-Aryan.
Fortunately, the group's telepath/faceman manages to rig a psychic link with the local guide, and aquires the ability to speak german for the duration. This gives them just enough time to sabotage one of the Nazi hovercraft before the rest of them take off into the arctic ocean.
Since the Hoffmann Institue was being thoughless and failed to provide water transportation, the agents then un-sabatoged the hovercraft and took off after the Nazis. One of the remaining hovercraft broke off from the rest to engage the agents, but after a battle involving many more grenades than a covert investigative agency should ever be using, the agents triumphed and made their way to the Nazi's destination.
An egyptian-style pyramid, rising out of the middle of the arctic ocean.
-----And then there was summer vacation-----
After a brief encounter with the nazi snipers left to guard the boats, the Hoffmann Agents dealt with a series of traps shamelessly stolen from a Basic D&D module, and then made their way into the winding depths of the pyramid--taking a different entrance than the Nazis did.
Judging by the high ceilings, odd furniture, and assorted bits of art, this pyramid was inhabited by creatures a bit larger and a bit less mammilian than humans. Much attention was paid to a set of quartz crystals that turned out to be simply decorative objects. Much attention was paid to the rather unorthodox (and alchemically based) refridgerator. Surprisingly little attention was paid to the human body undergoing a mummification process. It was discovered that "Keeper of the Sacred Altar" is closer to "Church Janitor" than "High Priest". Also, the sacred altar is clearly not designed for human sarcifice because there's no place for the blood to drain.
Some attention was also paid to things that were actually important to the plot--A series of murals explained the founding of the Order of Hermes and the creation of a set of three artifacts--The Cup, The Spear, and the Grey Device. A second set of murals showed the distruction of the grey device and the brutal war that followed.
Finally, they find the actual inhabitants of the pyramid--dinosaur men called the Kinori stand guard at the pyramid's other entrance. Their leader, an alchemist with black scales, is confounding the Nazi searchers by using his illusion powers to mask the doorway into the next room. The second-in-command is willing to talk to the one agent capable of understanding ancient egyptian.
The agents are referred to using a word that means "Small ones" or "Small things", but can also mean "Snacks". There is much discussion of this out of character, though the translator avoids mentioning this in his translation. "There was once an alliance between our two peoples" is vetoed as a conversation topic, given how that particular alliance ended. A much more comfortable "The enemy of my enemy is my friend" is settled upon, and the Agents and Kinori prepare to make war upon the Nazis.
-----And then it was time for Garrett to watch Desparate Housewives, and anyway, it was a school night---
War is made upon the Nazis. Between concussion grenades, white phosphorus grenades, and knockout gas, there are very few nazis left to be taken out by gunfire and kinori spears. The party is not made aware of the foolishness of using gas weapons in an enclosed environment because the Nazi commander is gunned down before he can enact his really awesome plan.
The entirely expected betrayal of the agents by the kinori takes place. The Blackscale Kinori bemoans his inability to use his 6HD or less sleep spell on the level 7 party. He also bemoans his ability to use his Trick talent on those members of the party that don't speak ancient egyptian. Finally, he bemoans the fact that the in order to get the sleep spell and the trick talent, he had to take levels of classes that gave him only d6 HD.
The Kinori Warriors are a bit more resilient. It is especially unfortunate that they have fire resistance, as it really reduces the effectiveness of the WP Grenades, the WP Ammo, and the Celestial Fire elemental that Dr. Akens summoned. They also manage to smash the techie's cool micro-tank.
The mummies have fire vulnerability, but their resistance against normal weapons more than makes up for it. Perhaps if they'd actually hit anything that was capable of failing a reflex save against their mummy rot, they would have been a threat. Finally, in the last round of combat, the Agent Mason contracted the disease.
The Hoffmann agents emerge victorious, with enough in the way of kinori prisoners that they could locate the grail, but not enough kinori prisoners to shift the half-ton block of stone that sits on top of it. After some lamenting that the Plan talent doesnt' affect ability checks, I am nice and let people aid another on a take-20.
The holy grail looks less like a cup and more like a vaguely cup-shaped machine. The agents wonder aloud what horrible things would befall them should they touch it. Smith becomes sick of the bickering and cowardice and touches the thing.
Before we continue, you should know a little bit more about Agent Smith. Anderson Smith started out as a fairly normal Ex-FBI investigator type. Then, on a vacation to the tropics between adventures, he was bitten by an odd purple lizard. The lizard's genetic material reacted to an already-existing instability in Smith's DNA, and cause him to develop lizard-like traits over the next few months--He's got natural armor, chameleon skin, a climb spead, and a host of other minor mutations (positive and negative). He'd been trying to hide this from the party (via very bulky clothing and invisible-man style face bandages), but without much success. His being half-lizard, half-mummy inspired some jokes during the conversation with the kinori.
See, the thing is, Smith's mutation is very clearly a disease. And he just touched the most powerful healing device on the planet. So in a spur-of-the-moment rat-bastard DM decision, I say that there is a flash of light and all of his mutations go away. There are more grail touchings and more flashes of light. Agent Mason is cured of mummy rot. Dr. Akens's aging penalties go away (but his ability scores were mostly even, so it does him very little good). One of the agents, unaware that he was developing cancer, is unaware that his cancer was cured.
After carting the grail (and the alchemical stone that kept the Kinori's meat cold) out of the pyramid, they call up the Hoffmann Institute. Director Nakami is personally interested in this case, and arrives ten minutes later in his office/UFO.
He thanks the agents, remarking that "The grail could be a danger if it had fallen into the hands of the Nazis, or anyone else for that matter". Dr. Neary questions that statement, and Nakami amends it to "anyone else besides the Hoffmann institute".
Dr. Neary remarks that it wouldn't be so bad if King Arthur found it. Nakami replies "Well, clearly, you didn't know King Arthur."
The question "Did you?" isn't answered to anyone's satisfaction.
-----Who knows what sort of mischeif our intepid investigators will be up to next week...-----
