Guy at my Wife's work nailed his Testicle to a House.

Vraille Darkfang · Jan 10, 2007

My wife works in the CAD Department, doing construction.

Guy at the job wasn't paying close attention with a Nail Gun & Impaled his Right Testicle to the Roof Framing.

It seems that in some of the areas they have to straddle the Frames and Nail as they go.

The proper techinque is to begin just pass your knee at fire the Nail Gun AWAY from you as you go. Then, you can pull yourself forward & repeat.

Some guys find it easier to simply stretch out as far as they can reach & Fire Nails towards their body. Stopping, then scooching backwards.

Seems this guy was using method #2 & not paying close attention.

So the familiar:"Thump: Nail-Wood"; "Thump: Nail-Wood"; "Thump:Nail-Wood"; became...

"Thump: Nail-Wood"; "Thump: Nail-Wood"; "Whump: Nail-Denim-Wood"; "Thwack: Nail-Denim-Skin-Muscle-Skin-Denim-Wood"; "Thwack: Nail-Denim-Scrotum-Right Testicle-Scrotum-Denim-Wood".

This was followed by a "AIEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!! HELP!!!! I Nailed by (Bleeps) to the roof!!!!!"

Thus follows a 911 call & 5 minutes waiting on an ambulance.

Did you many roofing nails have little backwards barbs on them, ensuring they remain impaled in the wood, and are thus nearly impossible to pull out?

I learned something new today.

Any way, the Peramedics had to cut the section of the roof he was impaled on away so they could lower him to the ground.

Then, in a Bob Via moment, they had to use a hacksaw, turned sidways into the wood, to cut the body of the nail off above the barbed part embedded in the wood.

Extraction of the steel spike from the Right Testicle was then possible.

Did you know the male testicle can survive being impaled with no lasting structural damage?

I learned something else new today.

The best part?

The Paramedic told the guy how lucky he was (The guy seemed to disagree).

Told him that if hadn't impaled his thigh first & thrown his aim off...

The Pressure Caused by the Wide Nail Head driving Flush into the Wood would have Ruptured his Impaled Testicle. (The EMT had seen it before).

I was a little surprised that the EMT had seen enough of these Nail Gun Testicle Impalments to be a good judge of severity.

So, the guy is going to be OK (Might walk a lil' funny for a few days).

A little Swelling. A few Stitches. Investing in Admantine Codpiece.

A-OK. (They gave him some pretty powerful pain meds).

So, to Sum up.

If using a Nail Gun, make sure you never aim anywhere remotely near your crotch.

Nightfall · Jan 10, 2007

Sound advice.

jgbrowning · Jan 10, 2007

Vraille Darkfang said:
make sure you never aim anywhere remotely near your crotch.

Sir, that is good advice for all but a few things.

joe b.

kenobi65 · Jan 10, 2007

OW!

A good friend of mine is an amateur blacksmith. Some years ago, he went out and bought a power hammer (a really big piece of electrical machinery, basically a hammer and anvil all in one automatic thingy). The "anvil" part of it is about 2 1/2 feet off the ground. As several of us were installing it, the guy from whom Frank bought it pointed out the height. "Don't stick your d**k in this."

Bad Paper · Jan 10, 2007

Vraille Darkfang said:
If using a Nail Gun, make sure you never aim anywhere remotely near your crotch.

great. NOW you tell me!

Dog Moon · Jan 10, 2007

jgbrowning said:
Sir, that is good advice for all but a few things.

joe b.

So true and yet some people never seem to learn this.

trancejeremy · Jan 10, 2007

Wasn't that an episode of Home Improvement?

Nightfall · Jan 10, 2007

Trance,

I believe it was a proposed accident that was never shown. Tim did however injury his groin one time, but not with a nail gun.

Tewligan · Jan 10, 2007

That story is totally nuts! I'll bet you had a ball recounting it, though.

Harmon · Jan 10, 2007

Proper safe technique and what one can do while using a nail gun are not always the same thing. Once in a while you have to shot back towards your self, because you are up high and you can’t be levitating out in the middle of no where to make the shot.

Scooching along and nailing back towards yourself sounds like this guy was an apprentice (couple stories to follow). He needed to be walking, course one never knows the situation he was in unless you can see for yourself, but seldom can one not walk when scooching is an option.

Story time-
Oh, about a thousand years ago when I was an apprentice carpenter I was nailing off a roof. Somewhere in the neighborhood of ten thousand or more square feet, in near hundred degree weather (sun shines two ways on a plywood room). I nailed my boot to the roof, right between my big toe and my index toe. Scared the hell out of me ‘til I realized I had missed my toes, then I was just really embarrassed.

Few years later on another job I was framing with a nail gun, we had a gun that had no semi auto fire. Depress the trigger and the safety and it went dry, so when the recoil knocked the gun back you had to release the trigger- sometimes you got a double shot if it bounced (this was before the little ring on the trigger to alter the auto to semi auto setting for those of you in the know). Nailed the bottom nail on a 2x6 block, the gun rebounded inside the stub bay and fired twice more, the third came over the edge and went through my left palm. I took a couple deep breaths went to the job shack, cut the head off the nail and pulled it through. It hurt like you couldn’t believe, but it healed up in a day or three.

Heard about an apprentice that shot himself in the side of the knee while working high in a lift. He started convulsing almost instantly, and then took a tumble out of the lift about twenty feet. His partner (not in the lift, but above him) jumped into the lift, dropped down. The kid was convulsive, flailing about, the carpenter pulled the nail out in a rush and the convulsing stopped. The kid lost all feeling from his knee down from what I heard later.