Tavern Thread: The Hanged Man

Evening falls, and the tavern surges with locals coming off of a long day's labour. They fill the tables near the door, calling for beer and meat, laughing and joking with each other, and catcalling the waitresses. There are cheaper inns in town, and ones with better beer if you know where to look, but these people are here for the atmosphere - to gawk at glamorous adventurers and colourful foreigners.

Tonight, they're also here for a contest.

The jester sweeps through the room, doffing his outlandish hat to several pretty ladies in the audience, and bounds onto the stage.

"Ladies and gentlemen, welcome, welcome, to the first Talebearer's Challenge, sponsored by the Jongleur's Guild of Bacarte! Tonight's the night that YOU can win fabulous prizes, just by entertaining your fellow patrons! (And hopefully providing us with material for years to come...)"

"So, let's see who's signed up..." His face falls as he looks at the signup sheet. "Two? That's it? Ah, well, we have to start somewhere, I suppose. Good news, boys - the competition's aenemic today! (That means it's flabby, try to stay with me here.)"

"Let me remind you of the rules. You come up, you tell a story, you earn your applause. Whoever gets the most applause wins..." With a flourish he pulls a velvet bag from midair, and opens it to reveal the sparkle of gold. "...50 gold pieces! 50 whole gold for one evening's work! (And we'd better get more than two entries next time, or this'll bankrupt us...)" The jester drops the sack on a stool next to him, pulls out a handful of coins, and spins them merrily from hand to hand. Suddenly he tosses the coins into the audience! People in the near seats scramble to grab them - and then stop when they realize the coins have vanished. The jester grins, poises his hand above the sack, and with a flourish makes the coins appear again and fall into the bag with a loud clink. "Sorry, folks - to win these coins, you have to enter!"

There is polite applause, which the jester waves away. "All right, WHO's up first? Petey! Petey the Weasel - get up here!"

The boil-faced youth stands up, accompanied by hollering and cheering from a large group of tables whose occupants look suspiciously similar. He makes his way to the stage and looks around uncomfortably. Finally the jongleur prompts, "So... you're here to tell us the story of the Princess in the Ice Tower?"

"Right... yeah. Ok. So, there's this princess, right? And she wants to see the world, so she runs away and goes to sea. And at first the sailors want to throw her off the ship, 'cause it's bad luck, right? But they find out she can talk to the birds and animals, 'cause that's what princesses do, and she charms the fish right into their nets, so they all eat like kings for a while and then they all love her."

He pauses and takes a huge breath. The jester mutters, "Slow down a bit, we've got time." Petey continues at a less breakneck pace.

"So, one day, the princess is fishing off the back of the ship, right, and she catches a big golden fish. And the fish says to her, 'I may look like a fish, but I'm really the King of the Sea! And if you spare my life, I'll give you three wishes!' So she figures this is a good deal, and she throws the fish back and makes her first wish, right?"

"So she's been watching this handsome young sailor who's always up in the rigging, right? But he's always up in the rigging staring out over the ocean and never looks down to see her, so she figures he's never even noticed her. So her first wish is for him to fall in love with her. And as soon as she thinks it, he looks down from the rigging, right into her eyes, and then his foot slips and falls right down, and bashes his head on the side of the ship, and slips under the water."

"And she screams and runs over to the side of the ship, but there's no sign of him, right? Just the big golden fish swimming along the side of the ship. And she yells at the fish and says, 'What about my wish?' And the fish says, 'Oh, you got your wish. He loves you. He's down in the Weed Kingdom now, trapped way down there under the waves, and he'll never get out or see the sun again, but his love for you is keeping him alive.' And then the fish disappears."

"Well, the princess figures she's learned her lesson, right? She's not gonna use any more of those wishes if they're gonna turn out like that! But the next day a big storm blows up, and a huge fog, and the ship starts pitching and rolling and all the crew start praying. And she figures there's no way they'll get out of this, she can barely see the other side of the deck and she can hear the waves crashing on rocks all around her, there's no WAY anybody could see to steer, and she closes her eyes and says to herself, 'Please, Sea King, you done me wrong with my last wish, but please listen to me now - save this ship and bring me safe to land and I'll never ask anything else from you again!'"

"Well, right away the screaming of the sailors stops and they stop hauling every which way and start working together as a team. They get the sails trimmed right up without ever saying a word, and the man on the tiller spins it around without ever straining to see through the fog, and the ship navigates around those rocks without even scraping one of them. And pretty soon they come out of the fog, right, and the princess looks around and sees all the men staring straight ahead like zombies, right, and as the sun hits them one by one they fall down stone dead. And that's when she realizes that she wished for the Sea King to save the ship, and to save her, but she didn't say anything about saving the crew."

"So now the crew's all dead, right, and the ship's drifting with no-one to steer it, but the princess doesn't panic, 'cause she remembers she wished to come safe to land so she figures she'll have to wash ashore sooner or later. And sure enough, before the end of the day the ship runs aground on a drifting island. So she leaves the ship, right, and walks up to the center of the island, and finds a great big tower."

"Now in this tower lived an evil warlock, right? And he sees her coming up the path and decides that a beautiful princess is just what he needs for his evil magic. So as soon as she knocks on the door, right, he casts a spell and captures her in a big iron cage. And she lives in the cage for weeks while he mutters over his old books and his experiments, but she knows the time's coming closer when he'll be ready to cast his big spell, and then he'll kill her or... or do horrible things to her."

He pauses a moment and looks around at the crowd. The jester is grinning in anticipation.

"So she says to him, right, she says, 'You better let me go, because I'm a friend of the Sea King and he owes me a favour!' But the warlock says, 'You fool, don't you know that you should never ask the sea for favours? It's wild and it's fickle and it'll give you your dreams and take 'em away again just as quick! You try to turn the Sea King against me, and you'll be sorry!' And the princess says, 'I tell you, the Sea King owes me a favour, and he always does what I ask, so let me go or I'll ask him to kill you!' But the warlock just laughs at her."

"So the princess yells as loud as she can, 'Sea King! You see this evil, wicked creature, this warlock in front of you? Kill him! That's my last wish - kill him for me!' And suddenly a man's standing there in the room, strong and handsome but with golden scales for skin. And he looks at the warlock, and he looks at the spellbooks, and he looks at the princess in the cage, and he nods and says to her, 'You did well to call on me. This man is working a great evil to gain power over all nature, and it will not stand. You are quite right - he must be stopped.'"

"And then suddenly the man is gone and the princess hears a horrible grumbling and groaning sound and the tower windows become blocked up, just like that, and the room becomes deathly cold, right? And the whole tower gets covered in snow, and everyone, warlock and princess and experiments and all, gets entombed in a big block of ice. And they say that island is still out there somewhere, drifting along in the shifting seas, and the ice has never melted even though everyone in the tower is long dead."

There's a pause, as Petey looks around at his audience expectantly, and then the jester mutters, "Not bad, kid, not bad, ending could use some punching up, but we'll work on that. Let's give him a hand, everybody! Petey the Weasel, everyone! Take a bow, Petey!" Petey hesitantly bows, and the two tables of people with the strong family resemblance to him erupt in cheering.

The rest of the room is dead silent. The jester shrugs, "Tough crowd tonight. All right, our next story is from Seven Rabbit. Go get 'em, Rabbit!"

Rabbit steps up on stage and clears his throat. "This is one of the classic stories of my homeland," he says. "I am translating as I go, so please excuse me if I stumble." He clears his throat again. "This is the story of

HOW THE BROTHERS CORN GAINED THE BLESSING OF DEATH

Long ago, when the world was young, before the Golden Kingdoms were golden, Acatl and his brother Itzcuintl became great champions of the ball game, like their father, One-Acatl, and their uncle, Seven-Acatl.

One-Acatl was the most famous champion of the age, so great that he attracted the attention of Death himself. One day a messenger arrived from the underworld challenging One-Acatl to come and play ball with Death. His wife and his slaves all begged him not to go, but he was too proud to back down from a challenge, so he gathered his teammates and all their equipment, and they set off on the journey to the underworld and never returned.

Years passed, and Acatl and Itzcuintl grew and gained fame as ball players themselves, and Death became bored. He decided to torment Acatl and Itzcuintl, so he sent a mosquito as a messenger to tell them how their father had died. It told them how Death had defeated their father and hung his head from a tree watching the ball court. Then Acatl and Itzcuintl decided to challenge Death to a rematch for their father's head.

But they decided they needed an ally in Death's kingdom, so they flattered the mosquito, and gave it the blood of their best slaves to drink, and before long it was devoted to them. Then they set off for Xibalba with the mosquito flying with them, telling them all the details of the terrain they were passing through.

When they reached the entrance to Xibalba they found a turtle sunning itself on a rock, and said, "Go down into the cave and find Death, and tell him that Acatl and Itzcuintl are coming to challenge him to a ball game! We will wait here until we receive his answer." But when the turtle had left with their message, they started down into the underworld immediately without waiting for an answer, and so they reached the edge of Death's domain before he was expecting them.

Even though Death was not expecting them, his domain was guarded, and on the shore of a river of boiling tar they were attacked by winged monkeys. But Acatl and Itzcuintl were great warriors as well as ball players, so they killed all the monkeys and used their bodies as a bridge over the river. The rest of the journey through the underworld was filled with traps and dangers, but the mosquito was able to guide them past all of them, and so before anyone became aware of their approach they reached the edge of the Land of Death."

Seven Rabbit pauses and looks at the crowd to see if anyone is paying attention.

[sblock=ooc]Sorry for the intrusion, but I thought I should speak up. Raiyek might not be technically back in the tavern to cheer, but I'm still enjoying the stories, Joe! I'm sure others are too - don't stop unless you want to. [/sblock]

The door to the tavern bursts opened and a stout dwarf enters dressed in full plate. He walks to the bar keep, orders an ale, and then states in a loud voice "My name is Kruk. I was one of a mighty group of adventurers who defeated the foul Hoofchew and his cohorts. I'm back looking for work and also looking for a spell caster named Vlastos. I heard he was here. Has anyone seen him?"

There is a gentle knocking at the tavern's door, and a timid male eladrin tiptoes into the building. He is dressed in elegant purple robes, guilded with floral patterns. Behind his hooked nose lies a mixture of contempt and confusion at his surroundings. His long, white hair blows gently as the door swings open behind him, and a slender Warforged enters to stand at the eladrin's side. The 'forged is dressed in a black suit-coat, and a longsword is seen sheathed at his waist. The eladrin clears his throat and steps forward.

"Um...hello" The eladrin bows slightly, obviously uncomfortable in this surrounding. "I...er...that is to say..."

The warforged leans forward a bit, cups a hand, and whispers into the stammering eladrin's ear. The eladrin nods, pausing periodically as he loudly repeats what the warforged is telling him to say.

"Patrons of the Hanged Man...I am a parent...what? No, patron! Yes, patron! I am a patron looking for some...hired hands to...help me solve a...personal matter. Payment will be given...once the task is...completed."

The eladrin lets loose a sigh of relief, then claps his hands and rubs them together.

"So! Are there any takers?"

[sblock=OOC]New adventure! Looking for five PCs for a well-balanced party. As the adventure is rather *ahem* difficult, three 1st level PCs and two 2nd level PCs would be ideal. Please respond IC if you are interested (and I'm sure you all are).[/sblock]

The jester glares at Kruk and says, "SHHHHH!" while gesturing at the dwarf performing on stage.

Seven Rabbit continues:

"When they arrived in the city of Death, they went straight to the Ball Court and saw Death's team practicing, but Death was not with them. So they sent the mosquito to spy into the changing rooms. In the Underworld Team's changing room it found Death pining for Xilonen, the goddess of fertility, who had spurned his advances. The mosquito came back and told Acatl and Itzcuintl what it had heard and they realized they could use Death's feelings against him.

The ball game was fierce. The galleries were crowded with spectres and spirits. At one end of the stadium the goddess Xilonen sat watching the match, and at the other hung the trophy, the severed head of One-Acatl. On Acatl and Itzcuintl's team were a small group of warriors who had been brave enough to enter the underworld with this. On Death's team were a group of horrible monsters with the the bodies of apes and the heads of crocodiles, lead by the unstoppable Lord of Death himself. Every time Death got the ball he began to show off and take risks to impress Xilonen, but his skill was so great that even with his recklessness, Acatl and Itzcuintl were hard pressed to keep up with him.

Death's monstrous ball players were stronger and faster than the twins' team, but the warriors were very skilled and they might have had a chance, but the underworld team was also cheating! Every time one of the warriors got the ball, it would explode with poisoned metal spikes, maiming the player who had grabbed it. Whenever this happened, one of the monsters would grab the injured player and maul him further, concealing the source of the wounds. Finally Acatl and Itzcuintl were the only players left, against Death's entire team.

But their skill was so great that they continued to play for hours, alone against all the might of the underworld, keeping the score tied. Every time Death would score, one of them would score soon after. At last, with the score still tied, Itzcuintl took the ball while Acatl stayed behind to block Death's team. Itzcuintl was out alone near the goal with no chance of any enemy catching him, but as he drew his arm back to score, spikes shot out of the ball, piercing his hand and head, and his body dropped lifeless to the sand of the arena."

[sblock=OOC]
Rabbit - L1 warlock - will be volunteering for this as soon as he finishes telling this story - one more section to go, I'll post it tonight or tomorrow.
[/sblock]

ooc: Just as an aside, I believe all the 2nd level PCs in L4W are either in Ebon Mirror or Captain's Caper, both of which are still in progress.

[sblock=OOC]Well, I meant that I want some to be their first adventure, others to be a bit more seasoned. Ideally, one of the folks from Hoofchew, one from the Skull, perhaps a third from either of the two, and the rest fresh recruits.

7 Rabbit is in, need four more.[/sblock]

The door to the tavern opens quietly and unobtrusively. Raiyek had heard what sounded like someone addressing the crowd, so he made a point of trying not to interrupt. He steps through the door - a tall elf clad in full plate mail, sword on his hip and shield on his back. Long black hair is tied up behind his head, and he's carrying a helmet under his arm. The armor seems to have a few dents and scrapes in it now, contrasting to its impeccable nature when he left the tavern just a short while ago.

Scanning the crowd for a moment, he gathers that Seven Rabbit seems to be telling a story ... and he notices a somewhat out-of-place pair as well. A finely dressed, uncomfortable looking eladrin and a similarly well dressed warforged, who looks much more comfortable than his companion. Raiyek walks up to them, curious what brings them here. In a low voice, so as not to disturb the story, he asks them, "So what brings you here? You don't look like adventurers yourselves ... are you perhaps looking to hire some?"
[sblock=OOC]I was going to wait patiently for a day or two before volunteering for this adventure, buuuut .... Don said he wanted someone from Hoofchew. Couldn't resist.

Raiyek Meliam, elf paladin level 1, offers his services.[/sblock]

JoeNotCharles said:

The jester glares at Kruk and says, "SHHHHH!" while gesturing at the dwarf performing on stage.

Click to expand...

Kruk looks at the jester "wha...oh...sorry...hmmff...that happens alot." He then surveys the crowd and notices the Rayeik talking to a newcomer. "Hmmm...I think I'll walk over and introduce myself to the stranger as well." He walks over to the stranger and states "I too am at your service if you need more." He looks at the elf palidan and then back to the stranger and states "You can count on him...I can tell you that first hand as I had the pleasure of fighting along side of him in defeating Hoofchew."

[sblock=OOC]
Don Incognito, I know that Rayeik was first from the Hoofchew group to talk to the stranger. I thought I'd ask just in case you need another to fill out your party.
[/sblock]