Adventure: Love Bites

Lord Sessadore · Mar 25, 2010

[sblock=OOC]Very, very nice haul

Good job guys, and thanks cov![/sblock]
Tristan pats Hacker on the shoulder. "That's a great idea, Hacker," he says, eyes fixed on the pile of loot despite his lesser appreciation for gold. "I'm afraid Woe might enjoy it too much and Mikara would have to stab him, though."

KenHood · Mar 26, 2010

"Way to spoil the ***** moment."

Hacker claps his hands. "Okay, youngsters, let's load up the loot and go find that blasted alchemist, apothecary, whatever."

H.M.Gimlord · Mar 26, 2010

Mikara sees the bow and her eyes grow wide, "Wooooooaah!"

Woe's left eyebrow raises as he rotates them in Mikara's direction.

"Not you... the bow!" She puffs air through an under-bit bottom lip, sending her bangs bouncing, "and 'No' on the group hug!" she shakes her head, "Men!"

The bow stands eight inches taller than she is, but she manages to heft it with perfect agility. "Yeah. I think it'll do."

KenHood · Mar 26, 2010

H.M.Gimlord said:
"...and 'No' on the group hug!" she shakes her head, "Men!"

"Gnome, *****! ***** me! I'm surrounded by ***** pervos and rascists! Can't you even appreciate some Gawds-*****-***** genuine a-*****-fection and collective ***** joy?! Hacker ***** Brass is a married ***** man, elf-woman! There is nothing ***** sexual about a group-*****-hug with Hacker ***** Brass! Gawds-***** re-*****-pressed deviants! *****!"

"Look!" shouts Hacker, hugging Kathalia, "Nothing ***** sexual at all! She's like the ***** daughter I'd never have."

"Look!" shouts Hacker, hugging Woe, "He's a ***** DUDE! And a ***** human one at that! Yeah, sure, he's some seriously ****** up phallic fixation, but--STILL--nothing ***** sexual at all!"

"Gawds-***** ***** sick *****!" screams Hacker spewing spittle as he gathers his treasure, "When you ****** finish your ****** ******, I'll be ****** out-*****-side!"

He storms outside, stringing profanities in his wake.

Lord Sessadore · Mar 26, 2010

Tristan's eyes widen and eyebrows raise at Hacker's outburst. Once he's gone, he quirks an eyebrow at Mikara. "Does he do that all the time?" he asks Woe, Atreus, and Kathalia.

H.M.Gimlord · Mar 26, 2010

Mikara stare's after Hacker in mock disbelief, "That wasn't racism!" she yells after the gnome, "It was self preservation!" She shrugs, and nocks an arrow in the new bow just to get a feel for the weapon. She smiles, impressed, "This dragon had taste."

She turns to Tristan with an apologetic look, "Maybe you'll get to spend the money in town once we clear Woe, settle with Dungwringer, find old 'What's-her-name,' and ..." She trails off for a moment, "Well, at least your rich." She smiles, shrugs, giggles a little bit and looks from Woe to Kathalia, "Well, I'm ready for what's next. I know you're all into the whole 'revenge' thing, but I would rather just find this girl and get back her back to her little vampire. I suggest we wash the blood from our clothes, go back to Dungwringer and make him think we found her exactly where he said we would. That might scare him into leading us to her...." She seems to think better of it, "On the other hand, we could just go back and torture him until he tells us.... Your call."

nerdytenor · Mar 26, 2010

Kathalia deflates a little bit when it appears that the group hug will not, in fact, occur. When Hacker has his characterstic outburst, she flushes at receiving his hug, despite the context.

Lord Sessadore said:
"Does he do that all the time?" he asks Woe, Atreus, and Kathalia.

"Mmm-hmm," Kathalia nods. "Hacker Brass is so passionate! It's one of my favorite things about the World's Best Gnome."

Kathalia approaches the hide armor.

"Oh my my my! Look at this!" She buries her face in it and inhales deeply. "Well I can tell you've been up to no good, naughty-little armor-parmor. Oh I just have to try you on!" Kathalia removes her current suit of armor, oblivious (or not caring) that there are five other people watching her undress. The large stretch of time since her last bathing session becomes readily apparent without her clothes on to provide a scent-barrier. She throws on the new hide and practically purrs with contentment, mercifully ending the spectacle.

"Does anyone else want to touch it? Mmmm, so nice... " she growls, petting her own arm.

nerdytenor · Mar 26, 2010

H.M.Gimlord said:
"Well, I'm ready for what's next. I know you're all into the whole 'revenge' thing, but I would rather just find this girl and get back her back to her little vampire. I suggest we wash the blood from our clothes, go back to Dungwringer and make him think we found her exactly where he said we would. That might scare him into leading us to her...." She seems to think better of it, "On the other hand, we could just go back and torture him until he tells us.... Your call."

"Mmm hmmm, scare, torture... sounds nice..." Kathalia says absentmindedly, still completely absorbed in her new attire.

[sblock=Kathalia Stat Block]
Kathalia, Elf Druid 4
Passive Perception 23, Passive Insight 16
AC 21, Fort 15/16(Beast), Reflex 18, Will 18/19(Beast)
HP 41/41 Bloodied 20, Surge Value 10, Surges 9/9
Speed 8, Initiative +6
Action Points: 1

Current Effects
Elf Form

Encounter Resources
Darting Bite
Predator's Flurry
Elven Accuracy (+2 feat and heal)
Second Wind
Use Action Point

Daily Resources
Healing Word
Amulet of Resolution
Predator Hide Armor
Fleet Pursuit
Fires of Life
[/sblock]

KenHood · Mar 27, 2010

H.M.Gimlord said:
"I suggest we wash the blood from our clothes, go back to Dungwringer and make him think we found her exactly where he said we would. That might scare him into leading us to her...." She seems to think better of it, "On the other hand, we could just go back and torture him until he tells us.... Your call."

Hacker pokes his head back into the cave. "We already made a plan, Mikky. We're going to pretend to be dead, then go find that alche-whatever priest-guy. I've already figured out how we'll spread the rumor, too. First, I'll buy a disguise kit and dress like a child. Then, we..."

He pauses and recalls that he's upset with the party. "I'm not listening to you!" he shouts, poking his fingers into his ears and darting back out of the cave.

nerdytenor said:
Kathalia nods. "It's one of my favorite things about the World's Best Gnome."

Hacker pokes his head back into the cave. "World's MOST INTERESTING Gnome."

He catches himself. "******!"

"I'm not listening to you!"

nerdytenor said:
"Does anyone else want to touch it? Mmmm, so nice... " she growls, petting her own arm.

"***** it!" shouts Hacker, stomping back into the cave. He snaps his fingers. "Chop chop, children! We've places to go and people to see! Move! Shoo! These bits of dragon in our packs aren't going to last forever! Get!"

Dunamin · Mar 29, 2010

H.M.Gimlord said:
"Wooooooaah!"

Woe's left eyebrow raises as he rotates them in Mikara's direction.

"Not you... the bow!" She puffs air through an under-bit bottom lip, sending her bangs bouncing.

“Sure, I can work with denial.” Woe poses proudly, more than thoroughly blinded by his own narcissism. “No need to be shy about it. Doctor Woe understands your need to psychologically project Woezilla as that new bow you’re fondling.”

He gives her a wink that peaks on Mikara’s personal tingle-scale.

“I’ll take a raincheck on that hug, though… with interest.”

Lord Sessadore said:
Tristan's eyes widen and eyebrows raise at Hacker's outburst. Once he's gone, he quirks an eyebrow at Mikara. "Does he do that all the time?" he asks Woe, Atreus, and Kathalia.

“Oh, I’ve got plenty of experience working with the type. You’d be surprised how common they are.”

KenHood said:
"Look!" shouts Hacker, hugging Woe, "He's a ***** DUDE! And a ***** human one at that! Yeah, sure, he's some seriously ****** up phallic fixation, but--STILL--nothing ***** sexual at all!"

Woe looks to his main hand, holding his spear. Then he glances over his shoulder, to the javelins stored on his back. Finally, he casts a look down at Woezilla.

“Buddy, of all the manically ranting butchers I’ve worked with, you’re the one that understands me best. The next barrel of Grayson’s Finest is on me!”

***

Later on, while pillaging the dragon’s lair, Woe comes upon the hide with glowing inked symbol, and uses the dragon femur he’s been cleaning up last night to poke it. The hide squirms and reaches out for the bone.

“Ooo, new toy!”

Woe pokes it again. The hide squirms again. Minutes pass by like this, with the warrior experimenting on different ways of taunting an unholy responsive tissue.

“Anyone up for Demon-Hide Frisbee?”