Around the Corner from the Hanged Man

Iron Sky · Nov 16, 2010

SIR EXSIXTEN IS NO ONES SECRATOR. AND SIR EXSIXTEN NEEDS NO SECRATOR FOR THE LORDS OF AWESOME RECORD HIS EVERY UTTERANCE IN THE BOOK OF ALL AWESOME, THERE SAVED FOR ALL TIME.

He looks at Papolstaanas. YOU SERVE THIS DAINTY VILLAIN? AND CORPORAL NONE THE LESS, A BIG ADVANCE FROM BEING INCORPOREAL.

Sir Exsixten turns back to Sharpe. SO, YOU ENSLAVE LIZARD GHOSTS AND BRING THEM TO MANIFESTATION AS REWARD FOR DOING YOUR EVIL BIDDING? SO, AS PHYSICAL VIOLENCE SEEMS TO NOT BE YOUR STRONG SUIT, YOU MUST BE A NECROMANCER! PERHAPS A WORTHY OPPONENT AFTER ALL.

THE GHOST LIZARD'S WORDS ARE FINALLY PROCESSED. SIR EXSIXTEN READIES HIMSELF FOR BATTLE, SPINNING ABOUT TO FIND THE DEMON MASQUERADING AS A LITTLE GIRL! WHAT GREATER CRIME COULD BE COMMITTED THAN CREATURES OF DARKNESS EMULATING ICONIC SYMBOLS OF CUTENESS?

Sir Exsixten spots a little girl tagging along behind her mother as they work their way down the street, levels his axe at her and booms out, HALT DEMON, SIR EXSIXTEN IS ON TO YOUR FOUL TRICKS. YOUR DISGUISE IS CLEVER, BUT SIR EXSIXTEN CAN SEE THROUGH ANY MASQUERADE. REVEAL YOURSELF!

Mewness · Nov 16, 2010

Iron Sky said:
He looks at Papolstaanas. YOU SERVE THIS DAINTY VILLAIN? AND CORPORAL NONE THE LESS, A BIG ADVANCE FROM BEING INCORPOREAL.

"What? I don't serve--don't you understand, he's crazy!"

Iron Sky said:
Sir Exsixten turns back to Sharpe. SO, YOU ENSLAVE LIZARD GHOSTS AND BRING THEM TO MANIFESTATION AS REWARD FOR DOING YOUR EVIL BIDDING? SO, AS PHYSICAL VIOLENCE SEEMS TO NOT BE YOUR STRONG SUIT, YOU MUST BE A NECROMANCER! PERHAPS A WORTHY OPPONENT AFTER ALL.

"But I'm not a ghost, I'm--"

Iron Sky said:
Sir Exsixten spots a little girl tagging along behind her mother as they work their way down the street, levels his axe at her and booms out, HALT DEMON, SIR EXSIXTEN IS ON TO YOUR FOUL TRICKS. YOUR DISGUISE IS CLEVER, BUT SIR EXSIXTEN CAN SEE THROUGH ANY MASQUERADE. REVEAL YOURSELF!

"But--no! Wait! What are you--"

Luinnar · Nov 16, 2010

I say, they are crazy in foreign land, aren't they. Sharpe says whispering to Papolstaanas.

You show some respect to Corporal Behemoth you frivolous foreign falstaff! Your incorporeal wossnames and whatnots and necromincers! Don't speak foreign! You are not even fit to lick his boots, as Corporal Behemoth is not even fit to spit-shine my boots (unless we are out of clean rags)!

Hmm, whats that my dear? he says suddenly pulling out his sword. You want to drink his clockwork gears? What a evilishly clever idea my dear!...Soon Betty...soon....

When I conquer this land I shall sit on its throne and you shall be my queen! Together we shall rule, and Corporal Behemoth will bring us small sandwiches with the crust cut off and that mechanical menace will be nothing more than a metal goblet.

Sharpe throws back his head.
Bawhahahaha!

BenBrown · Nov 16, 2010

"Wait. Hold on!" Kaeysari shouts, interposing herself between Sir Exsixten and the little girl.

"I'm sorry," she says to the girl and her mother. "The insane asylum must be having a field trip today."

She turns back to the would-be knight. "Are you out of your mind? My friend here was giving an example, not making an accusation. I don't care where you're from. A heroic knight does not go around threatening small children."

"And as for you," she wheels and glares at Sharpe, "You can talk about the armies of your vast slave-empire when you've actually got one. Until then, talk sensible or be quiet. If you two want to fight, there's a big battle over there that you can join. The rest of us are just waiting for the brawl to clear out so we can get back to the tavern."

Luinnar · Nov 16, 2010

BenBrown said:
"And as for you," she wheels and glares at Sharpe, "You can talk about the armies of your vast slave-empire when you've actually got one. Until then, talk sensible or be quiet. If you two want to fight, there's a big battle over there that you can join. The rest of us are just waiting for the brawl to clear out so we can get back to the tavern."

Ah yes, the little scrap I passed on the way through. he says waving his hand dismissively. Nothing compared to the bloodshed and carnage I have caused! A mere peasant would not understand the true horror of having to eat your own foot on the battlefield, because you could not find your socks! Or stabbing your opponents through the head, because you could not find his eye! Or the eloquent dance of death cause by.. those sharp pointy stick things... The volley! Yes, the volley!

BenBrown · Nov 16, 2010

"A mere peasant!" Kaeysari growls. Then quietly to herself says "no, no, don't taunt the madman. Obviously an escaped lunatic who's most likely to harm only himself. Hasn't actually seen much fighting or wouldn't be this jolly about it."

Luinnar · Nov 16, 2010

Talking to yourself is the first sign of madness, or so they say, peasant. Sharpe says giggling madly.

Iron Sky · Nov 16, 2010

SIR EXSIXTEN STARES AFTER THE SO-CALLED "LITTLE GIRL" THEN GIVES PARTING ADVICE AS THE DEMON'S KEEPER HURRIES HER OFF DOWN THE STREET.

MADAM, SHOULD YOUR "CHILD" TURN OUT TO BE A FIRE-BREATHING DEMON, COME TELL THE GHOST LIZARD AND IT WILL FIND SIR EXSIXTEN, CHAMPION OF THE ORDER OF THE RED PLUS, ~~HUMBLE~~ MIGHTY AVATAR OF THE LORDS OF AWESOME SO WE MAY DESTROY SAID DEMON IN LEGENDARY COMBAT.

Sir Exsixten turns to Kaeysari. IF LITTLE GIRLS WANT TO WALK DOWN THE STREET SAFELY, THEY SHOULD HAVE THE DEMONS STOP TAKING THEIR APPEARANCE. WHAT IF THAT "LITTLE GIRL" TURNS OUT TO BE A DEMON AND DESTROYS HALF THE TOWN? YOU'LL BE SORRY THEN. JUST WAIT AND SEE!

He returns to Papolstaanas, glancing at Sharpe's sword. YOU GOT A SWORD SWITCHED FOR YOUR DEATH-WAND NECROMANCER, MAKE HASTE TO A WANDITORIUM TO CLAIM A PROPER INSTRUMENT SO WE CAN DO BATTLE PROPERLY.

SIR EXSIXTEN LEANS CLOSE TO THE GHOST LIZARD, CONCERNED THAT HIS PROXIMITY MIGHT GIVE IT A HEART ATTACK FROM OVER-AWE. Sir Exsixten looks at Sharpe and speaks to Papolstaanas in a conspiratorial whisper. I THINK THAT NECROMANCER MIGHT POSSESS A DECENT STOCKPILE OF THIS 'CRAZY' YOU SPOKE OF EARLIER.

Mogwaimon · Nov 16, 2010

A dark-skinned finely muscled dwarf can be seen going by the fight in front of the Hanged Man, looking over at the spectacle. He has a greataxe strapped to his back, and his chainmail armor is splattered with dried blood. He stops, and looks around. Upon seeing the small gathering next to the tavern, he saunters over, edging past the elven bard as he does so. He glares at the gathered adventurers, and they can see a large scar running down his forehead all the way down into the scruff of his black goatee.

He grumbles, "What is this besodden mess? Can't a man get a cold pint after a hard day of offing basement rats? I heard this place was lively, but I figgered at least I'd be able to relax while I waited for me next contract."

OOC:

This is like my first time, so be gentle, haha. Also, is it mandatory to have pretty colors for character dialogue?

Mewness · Nov 16, 2010

Luinnar said:
You show some respect to Corporal Behemoth you frivolous foreign falstaff! Your incorporeal wossnames and whatnots and necromincers! Don't speak foreign! You are not even fit to lick his boots, as Corporal Behemoth is not even fit to spit-shine my boots (unless we are out of clean rags)!

"Stop calling me that! My name is Papolstaanas!"

Iron Sky said:
SIR EXSIXTEN LEANS CLOSE TO THE GHOST LIZARD, CONCERNED THAT HIS PROXIMITY MIGHT GIVE IT A HEART ATTACK FROM OVER-AWE. Sir Exsixten looks at Sharpe and speaks to Papolstaanas in a conspiratorial whisper. I THINK THAT NECROMANCER MIGHT POSSESS A DECENT STOCKPILE OF THIS 'CRAZY' YOU SPOKE OF EARLIER.

Papolstaanas starts violently and shields his face as Sir Exsixten leans closer to him. Even while Sir Exsixten is speaking, his eyes linger worriedly on the blade of Sir Exsixten's axe. "E-exactly!" Papolstaanas quavers, the tremor in his voice indicating that he really is quite as overawed by Sir Exsixten's overawesomeness as Sir Exsixten predicted, the poor fellow. "B-but I'm not, I'm not a ghost."