How to annoy a paladin, and not get killed in the procces?

Ragmon · Jan 16, 2012

Welcome one and all!

Edit: Lets keep the primary focus on "how to annoy paladins" (since its fun), and if you have some advice on the real life part of my dilemma I would appreciate it very much.

WARNING - This thread will be self centered and about being a pain in the ass, and being the as*hole at the table, to annoy another pain in the ass player (atleast for me but imo he is annoying the others too, but noone one complains cause we don't really have an option who we play with in this little town in Serbia).

I this tread i wish to address certain problems with a player character and his paladin that I'm having as a player in D&D 3.5 Faerun.

The situation is that the guy who is playing as the paladin (PC1) is playing as a paladin (again), and well he is not know for being a fair or consistent when it comes to playing as LG, Namely slaughtering hordes of goblins then asking the ones to leave without question or Det. Evil... even tho he is hauling around a dwarf who has been detected as Evil and was found unconscious anyway. Oh and he tries to justifies every thing with Det. Evil, and the DM is being neutral about these things (cause he has a short fuse and well its not pretty when he "explodes").

now where was I...
Oh yea, so how to annoy a level 5 paladin without disrupting the group, its a bit stupid since none of us wants to "rock the boat".
So I am looking for creative ideas annoy/solve the the paladin problem.

And FYI, im really thinking about quit the group...the only group here who play D&D cause of PC1 (and damn I love D&D, i even managed to tolerate the guy for more then 2 years now). There are 4 of us so noone really wins if i leave.
And the only thing holding me up now is the hope that i can annoy the guy... (its really sad i know)

was · Jan 16, 2012

You need to get together with your fellow players and have a talk with the DM minus the annoying guy. Give the DM a chance to talk with him and try to modify his gaming style. If he doesn't, then you as a group can vote to boot him from your game. I wouldn't recommend trying to annoy him into leaving. It frequently ends up annoying everybody and may make you look petty.

Deset Gled · Jan 16, 2012

I don't really recommend this style of play, but a thread about ways to annoy a Paladin entertains me, so here goes:

Play a cleric of an Evil deity, but keep a Lawful Neutral alignment (so you still work well together). Once you hit 11th level, every time you "accidentally" stand in his cone of detect evil, your aura will be overwhelming and it will stun the paladin.

Play a non-evil Cleric, and become a master of the undead. Make the paladin fight alongside evil.

Play a character than can Detect Evil. If the paladin ever conveniently "forgets" to use Detect Evil because he wants to interact with an evil thing without consequence, cast it yourself and loudly and publicly announce your findings.

Make sure you run into as many good-aligned undead as possible. They'll still show up on Detect Evil.

"Accidentally" kill his mount with friendly fire.

Convince him that an evil act must be performed to save the world. Don't help him atone.

Ask him for guidance in morally questionable situations. Carefully note his response/recommendation. Next time he does something that goes against his previous stance, remind him of it.

Alternatively: Ask him for guidance in morally questionable situations; don't follow his advice.

Ragmon · Jan 16, 2012

was said:
You need to get together with your fellow players and have a talk with the DM minus the annoying guy. Give the DM a chance to talk with him and try to modify his gaming style. If he doesn't, then you as a group can vote to boot him from your game. I wouldn't recommend trying to annoy him into leaving. It frequently ends up annoying everybody and may make you look petty.

I don't wish to sound like I'm belittling you wisdom...but its a bit complicated and delicate.
No one wishes to boot anyone cause there are 4 of use, so if 1 leaves that is 2+1 in the end which is in my opinion is not enough for a group and replacements are not an option.
And i don't want to annoy him so he leaves. I just want to be a pain in his side for a while, and I am asking you guys (not implying that you guys know how to annoy ppl), to help me a bit, since I have no clue about how to be subtly annoying.
And I mentioned the Paladin part since well that is what he is playing as...as in the target of pranks, insults, and subtle references to him being a murderous paladin (as so that we don't start a debate/argument about the LG Paladins morals again.

Ragmon · Jan 16, 2012

Deset Gled said:
I don't really recommend this style of play, but a thread about ways to annoy a Paladin entertains me, so here goes:

Play a cleric of an Evil deity, but keep a Lawful Neutral alignment (so you still work well together). Once you hit 11th level, every time you "accidentally" stand in his cone of detect evil, your aura will be overwhelming and it will stun the paladin.

Play a non-evil Cleric, and become a master of the undead. Make the paladin fight alongside evil.

Play a character than can Detect Evil. If the paladin ever conveniently "forgets" to use Detect Evil because he wants to interact with an evil thing without consequence, cast it yourself and loudly and publicly announce your findings.

Make sure you run into as many good-aligned undead as possible. They'll still show up on Detect Evil.

"Accidentally" kill his mount with friendly fire.

Convince him that an evil act must be performed to save the world. Don't help him atone.

Ask him for guidance in morally questionable situations. Carefully note his response/recommendation. Next time he does something that goes against his previous stance, remind him of it.

Alternatively: Ask him for guidance in morally questionable situations; don't follow his advice.

Yes I am well aware of the fact that I'm being the bad player..but lets forget that for a while.

Hmm I like the Neutral Cleric with the Evil God idea...I will make one when and if my level 5 wizard (Transmutation specialist, true neutral) dies.

But if I fail on "accidentally" kill the mount...it will snitch on me. XD

And I love all of the ideas without comment.

Lets see what other ppl can come up with.

Grogg of the North · Jan 16, 2012

From the big book of practical jokes and pranks:

Rub poison ivy on the inside of his cod piece.

Cast magic mouth on his weapon. Have it say things like "You hit like a girl!", "Why don't you wear a dress!" or "Are you still gay?!" whenever he swings his sword.

Write "Property of the Nine Hells" on his armor with indelible ink.

Forge an official letter from some government-type (earl, duke, ...etc...) to the victim demanding their presence at their high court at some time some day soon. They will attend only to be turned away. Later, forge another letter from the same person demanding their presence at the next meeting of the court since they didn't attend the last one. They will be turned away again. Finally, forge another letter telling them there is an official warrant out for their arrest due to their refusal to appear at the court. Sit back and watch 'em sweat.

Put a magic item in his bag that gives him protection from good. Invite the paladin to accompany you to the High Temple of Healing and Justice.

Cast Alarm on his chamber pot.

Otherwise, I would highly recommend you read this:
http://theglen.livejournal.com/16735.html?thread=18015

Ragmon · Jan 16, 2012

Grogg of the North said:
Otherwise, I would highly recommend you read this:
theglen: 2000 things Mr. Welch can no longer do during an RPG

Dude thanks this is just pure gold.

Duke Arioch · Jan 16, 2012

Hey Ragmon. Fellow countryman here lol.
I feel for you, man, as I encountered the same problem many times. I even posted here asking how to build acharacter which will overshadow uber-power player.
Tactics like that (including annoying another player) sometimes work, and sometimes can backfire, ruining your game or, even, your group. Ask yourself if it is worth a risk. In example I used, I was willing to take a chance as I am very good friend with the said guy.
My advice is to speak with DM and other players to see if they think the same as you. If they don't, you are alone in this, and anything you do will actually come right back at you. However, if they are on the same side as you, I advice you all to gather and talk to him openly, telling him(her?) what bothers you all. Role playing is awesome, but one should not put it in front of everyone else' fun.
Then react according to his/her reaction.

And, now for some sly tricks you could pull:
1) Create an evil and more powerful character than his and get SRD:Undetectable Alignment - D&D Wiki
2) Conspire with your DM to create a lawful good monster which is usually evil and let him slaughter it. Then refuse to help him get his atonement (or charge for the help)
...
Good luck!

Jackinthegreen · Jan 17, 2012

Become a Malconvoker. You're a good guy summoning evil creatures to combat evil creatures. Best to find a way to Take 10 on bluff checks though.

Lawful Good creature that's usually evil? Succubus Paladin. D&D Fight Club: The Succubus Paladin