Destroying the Zombies with Awesomeness

Bullgrit · Mar 3, 2012

I posted a picture of my lever-action .30-30 rifle hanging on the wall behind my desk, and it kind of sparked a funny banter about taking on the zombie hordes of a ZA.

A farmer mentioned using his combine as a mobile fighting platform, and that got me thinking. What kind of real-world awesomeness might we see people improvise to rock the walking dead infested world? Stuff that Hollywood writers just would never conceive of.

Feel free, (and encouraged), to add your ideas to the post on my site as well as here.

Bullgrit

NewJeffCT · Mar 3, 2012

I think a regular medieval style castle would be tough for zombies to penetrate - high stone walls and usually limited access (bridge over moat pulled up and gate sealed)

Usually, castles have places to store food and wells for a water supply as well.

RangerWickett · Mar 3, 2012

Kids in school luring zombies into the science section with pig brains from the bio lab, then drawing them into the chemistry lab, where they open the bunsen burner gas lines and rig an explosion?

Dannyalcatraz · Mar 3, 2012

There's lots of heavy machinery out there that would be perfect for taking on zombies- steamrollers, bulldozers, tanks- the trick is wrapping your head around the fact that you're not killing people, you're destroying zombies.

Kzach · Mar 3, 2012

Dannyalcatraz said:
There's lots of heavy machinery out there that would be perfect for taking on zombies- steamrollers, bulldozers, tanks- the trick is wrapping your head around the fact that you're not killing people, you're destroying zombies.

This wouldn't be a problem for me.

The problem with heavy machinery, though, is that often the cabins aren't very well protected. Many don't even have side windows or doors and those that do often have them as plexiglass. Given how slow they and how poor their manoeuvrability is, you'd end up getting caught overwhelmed and bit at the very least.

I'd keep my traps and tricks as simple as possible. Simple = low expertise requirements, less chance of not working. Barbed wire, for instance, laid out on the ground around an encampment. Easy for people to avoid, but zombies would get caught up in it and trip over and tangled. Bells on the barbed wire would also act as an alert system.

Other simple things like small ditches dug like moats so that zombies break ankles. A crawling zombie is much easier to handle than a walking/running one. Or just large trenches dug with some of that heavy machinery everyone is so keen on, would stop zombies pretty much dead.

KISS. Surviving a ZA isn't rocket science. This is why I'm such a fan of the ZA: it'd kill off all the stupid people

Olgar Shiverstone · Mar 3, 2012

Yeah, the .30-30 is a pretty poor choice for a Zombie weapon. Since (I assume) you pretty much have to sever the spinal column and chop them up to stop them, a rifle doesn't work too well. You don't need penetration unless your zombies wear body armor, you want massive damage.

I'd favor shotguns, fragmenting weapons like hand grenades and 40mm grenade launchers, high temperature weapons from Molotov cocktails to thermite grenades, and brute-force things like combines, threshers, and other big chop-and-grind machinery.

Of course, zombies aren't that smart, so misdirection helps. Tiger pits and other obstacles are good choices, at least until they trap so many zombies that they can climb up each others backs to escape. Bulldozers are a bad choice by themselves, but combine them with a good pit and some concrete blocks and you have a great zombie immobilization system.

Dannyalcatraz · Mar 3, 2012

Most eco-freindly ZA weapon: a flock of hungry vultures.

El Mahdi · Mar 3, 2012

How about mounting a wood chipper to the front of a truck. Put a cattle catcher on it like old steam trains and scoop em' up.

Dannyalcatraz · Mar 4, 2012

New shows for cable during the Zombie Apocalypse:

American Chipper Shredder: Junior vs Senior

Zombie Garage with Jessie James

How its made: Zombie Edition

Dannyalcatraz · Mar 4, 2012

Thinking more...Flock of Vultures should probably also be the name for the first post-ZA New Wave Band.

"I walked along the avenue.
I never thought I'd meet a girl like you;
A zombie girl like you.
With missing hair and cloudy eyes;
The kind of eyes that hypnotize me through;
Hypnotize me through.

And I ran, I ran so far away.
I just ran, I ran all night and day.
I couldn't get away.

A cloud of flies above your head;
A beam of light comes shining out through you,
Shining out through you.
The flies are moving nearer still.
The shotgun hole comes in view;
The gun-hole comes in view.

And I ran, I ran so far away.
I just ran, I ran all night and day.
I couldn't get away.

I didn't want to touch your face;
You're so disgusting in my view;
Disgusting in my view.
Reached out your hand to grab at me;
I'm throwing all my lefts and rights at you;
Lefts and rights at you.

And I ran, I ran so far away.
I just ran, I ran all night and day.
And I ran, I ran so far away.
I just ran, I couldn't get away."