ceramic d.m. final judgement posted

Just under the gun there. In order we have

picture #1 in the opening section.

picture #5 is in the library

Picture #2 on screen in the center

Picture #6 is Jean's contact

Picture #4 is Kent's partner in the hotel

picture #3 is in the final section.


good luck mirthcard. I will have to check to see the final verdict later tonight or tomorrow. Same here on the tightening of the story. Next time I should be happier with my submissions as I won't be moving 350 miles around writing.

I am impessed with the entries and the timing...

Very close, very slick

Like both stories! Hard to choose.

Ill have to reread them when Im not so tired.

as for the judging...


well, here we have a battle of styles AND content. medieval adventure vs. modern spymastering. and you guys thought you had it tough with the pictures!

in the order they were posted-

mirthcard sends us off on the rarest of adventures-no combat. mirthcard has handled the ingredients extremely well, finding uses for each without any of them particularly stretching the parameters set up by the images. every time an image arises i can see why a publisher would choose the images form the story the pictures represent as the illustrations.

i worry somewhat about the possibility of a party stuck in his otherworld indefinetely, but any party that goes that far probably deserves that and worse. i also would have appreciated a little more mechanic to explain the spirits staying just out of the parties reach, as most players are going to try and test this kind of limitation.

milo sets us in a black-ops world and drops us into the story without much background, leaving us to feel our way in and to try and understand the characters more slowly. i was a little disappointed in some of the handling of the ingredients. the picture of the deer through the tree that move the library shelf could have easily been substituted for any of the other ingredients and that left me feeling a boit cheated.

i like the inclusion of the philosophers stone element, but would have given a higher score if the story would have hinged more on the ingredients instead of just including them. a pretty good story, but i think it falters more than once in the handling of the writing making the pictures important enuf to be the illustrations for the story.

all considered i think both are strong standing alone, but within the parameters of competition mirth card comes out ahead.


Winner- Mirthcard

congrats and thanks to all who participated

Congrats to both on a fine final round!

alsih2o said:

as for the judging...


well, here we have a battle of styles AND content. medieval adventure vs. modern spymastering. and you guys thought you had it tough with the pictures!

in the order they were posted-

mirthcard sends us off on the rarest of adventures-no combat. mirthcard has handled the ingredients extremely well, finding uses for each without any of them particularly stretching the parameters set up by the images. every time an image arises i can see why a publisher would choose the images form the story the pictures represent as the illustrations.

i worry somewhat about the possibility of a party stuck in his otherworld indefinetely, but any party that goes that far probably deserves that and worse. i also would have appreciated a little more mechanic to explain the spirits staying just out of the parties reach, as most players are going to try and test this kind of limitation.

milo sets us in a black-ops world and drops us into the story without much background, leaving us to feel our way in and to try and understand the characters more slowly. i was a little disappointed in some of the handling of the ingredients. the picture of the deer through the tree that move the library shelf could have easily been substituted for any of the other ingredients and that left me feeling a boit cheated.

i like the inclusion of the philosophers stone element, but would have given a higher score if the story would have hinged more on the ingredients instead of just including them. a pretty good story, but i think it falters more than once in the handling of the writing making the pictures important enuf to be the illustrations for the story.

all considered i think both are strong standing alone, but within the parameters of competition mirth card comes out ahead.


Winner- Mirthcard

congrats and thanks to all who participated

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Wow. Thanks alsih2o.

I'm the Ceramic DM. That's so cool. (As an aside - my wife is a potter who has studied at Penland, has a BFA in Ceramics from East Carolina University and just finished in December a MA in Teaching Art from Western Carolina University. She's not a gamer, but is very supportive and it's kinda weird after all this time trying to get into and win the Iron DM that I actually end up winning the first Ceramic DM.)

Thanks for the great competition Milo. Your story was really well done and I enjoyed it tremendously. Yours was so stylistically different from mine - it's always interesting to me to see the varied ways that the elements provided end up being used.

Now for a little exposition. When I first saw the pics I immediately had a problem with #1 & #4. I couldn't tell WTF #1 was, and #4 just didn't fit thematically. I put those on the back burner.

#2 brought to mind Ingmar Bergman's Seventh Seal (actually Woody Allen's Love & Death that pays homage to Bergman was my first thought) and The Dance of Lifey Death is the title of a great comic by Eddie Campbell that I swiped.

That combined with #3 made me plan on using some elements of classical mythology, combining the stories of Perseus and the Medusa (brought on by the mirrored shield in Clash Of The Titans) with the story of the woman who is turned to salt as she looks back on her way to the Underworld. I'd make her be turned to stone by a medusa instead.

Once I had those elements in place, then #5 would be the entrance to the Underworld and #6 would be a guide who lead the heroes to the tree. Now what to do about #1 & #4.

I was so stumped by #1 that I skipped it again and decided to see if coud find out what the script (japanese?) on the woman's tattoo actually said. Jumped on the web and looked up the Malu Tattoo site that is credited in #4. Turns out that the woman who owns Malu Tattoo is named April Love. Tried to look up what the characters in the tattoo mean, but wasted alot of time and decided instead to change the medusa to the Angel of Love, inspired the artist's name.

With that decision, all of the backstory of Harun, Eustice and Robard came pouring out (partly inspired by two of the people in #2 as well). Switched around #3 & #6 to make them fit. Now back to #1. That was my weakest element. I just couldn't figure it out, which is why I made it a village in the Otherworld. That kind of crazy architecture would fit on another plane of existence, right? (What is that pic anyway, alsih20???)

If I'd given myself a little more time to work all of this out, I would have added more about the Angel of Love and how the party would have interacted with her. I probably would have given the party another out as well, although I'm not sure how. I think I would have played up a confusion about the Angel of Love possibly being a medusa instead, bringing back my original use of that element. But, as always, I pushed the deadline and had to let things fall where they may. Luckily for me, that worked out.

So thanks again everbody. You too, Mark and Maldur for the encouraging words. Now I'm off to change my sig line to something suitably obnoxious

Jay

Sig has officially been changed

mirthcard said:

(What is that pic anyway, alsih20???)

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no clue, it has been on my drive for a while now (i have a rather large base of pics i draw inspiration from) it looked to me like giant versions of what some of the mudwasps around here do, and i am fond of firing their nests

What can I say in defense of my story? Not a whole lot really when it comes down to it. I entered the competition on the admission that by nature I am a fitful writer when it comes to stories. When I do write it tends to poetry and not actual fiction of any type.

As to the nature of the story and it's tone it came about rather oddly. I happened to be in one chat or another and someone was talking about the Illuminati. That stuck a little in my head as I initially sat down to write the story. I scrapped that idea in favor of something more Victorian. As I packed some of my toys I happened upon my "I've been Illuminated" Illuminati button. I took that as a sign and back I went to the story. Throughout that day I continued to write and pack.

Now as I said, I was initially heading down to Florida on the 1st of the year. As I wrote and packed on the 30th I was struck by the desire to spend New Years with my family. So I finished packing my belongings, loaded the dogs and headed 350 miles south.

Once I set down to write it was still in fits around during everything else on my list. So the story seems to have come out sounding very rushed. Some of the ingredients were slighted but the shield, tattoo, and crowd were supposed to be central. Late last night the crowd got deregulated to the screen in the control room. That left the tattoo and shield as central plot devices. The shield was the housing place for the stone so in reality it was supposed to be the main plot device. The tattoo was supposed to be the key Jean used to unlock how to open the shield. But that paragraph apparently got lost somewhere while dealing with my children.

The other major problem I think is I was not blatant enough in detailing the particular picture. Given the nature of the story paying attention to any detail would have seemed wrong somehow.


Congratulations to Mirthcard for keeping me from feeling like I cheated my way to the final round.

Milo Bloom said:

Congratulations to Mirthcard for keeping me from feeling like I cheated my way to the final round.

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Thanks Milo. And congratulations to you to for coming through with entries over a jam-packed holiday. I own a retail business and have an 11 month old son, but that pales in comparison with what you had going on. You deserve quite the pat on the back for what you were able to do given the circumstances. Happy New Year!