Player Characters are not fiction characters

Voneth · Jan 7, 2003

For the benefit of those who might hold delusions that PCs act just like characters in fiction:

Fiction:
“Captain, there was a small unknown energy signature on the rear sensor screens for just a second.”
“It was probably just a sensor glitch, Full speed ahead!”

Game:
“Captain, there was a small unknown energy signature on the rear sensor screens for just a second.”
“Turn the ship around! Full ramming speed! Shields up! We’ll find those cloaked bas***** yet!”

Fiction:
“Boy, I can’t believe airport security these days. They even took my nail file. Oh well, at least we got to our isolated cabin on the lake without a hassle”
*Banjo plays in the distance*

Game:
*Still at the airport*
“Boy, I can’t believe airport security these days. I told them I had permits for every single weapon in my luggage, in my coat and in my shoes!”
*Theme to Die Hard2 plays in the distance*

Fiction:
“Did you hear a noise?”
“Nope, it was nothing. Lets just keep moving along”

Game:
*Players spot the GM rolling a die behind the screen and yet does nothing*
“Did you hear a noise?”
“Nope, but I am not moving from this spot until I Listen something or Spot something!”

Feel free to add.

JacktheRabbit · Jan 7, 2003

Fiction - Dozens of heavily armed soldiers charge into the room surrounding everyone who realizing the futility of the situation drop their weapons and surrender.

Gaming - Dozens of heavily armed soldiers charge into the room surrounding everyone. Unfortunately one PC has been bored of his character concept and leads an suicidal charge at the soldiers who kill everyone in a bloody TPK.

Mathew_Freeman · Jan 7, 2003

Fiction: "And so I reveal myself, Lord Evil of Castle Doom, and prepare to give you a page of meaningful dialogue and explanation before the final fight..."

Game: "And so I reveal myself, Lord Ev - "
"Quickend Haste! Lightning Bolt! Disintegrate!"

JRRNeiklot · Jan 7, 2003

Tallarn said:
Fiction: "And so I reveal myself, Lord Evil of Castle Doom, and prepare to give you a page of meaningful dialogue and explanation before the final fight..."

Game: "And so I reveal myself, Lord Ev - "
"Quickend Haste! Lightning Bolt! Disintegrate!"

LMAO! Are you sure you're not one of my players?

Victim · Jan 7, 2003

DocMoriartty said:
Fiction - Dozens of heavily armed soldiers charge into the room surrounding everyone who realizing the futility of the situation drop their weapons and surrender.

Gaming - Dozens of heavily armed soldiers charge into the room surrounding everyone. Unfortunately one PC has been bored of his character concept and leads an suicidal charge at the soldiers who kill everyone in a bloody TPK.

Alternatively, it turns out that the PCs are more heavily armed or tactically savvy than the soldiers, and prevail despite "impossible" odds.

Fictional characters sneak into the heavily fortified refueling base for the enemy star fleet, place demo charges, and level the place.

PCs hack the orbital defense satelites, use enough firepower against the base to hit the fuel that's still deep underground and set off massive explosions inside the planet, and fire more of the defense network at all the ships parked in orbit, wiping out an entire enemy fleet - and their planet. Oops.

Forrester · Jan 7, 2003

Fiction: "And I bequeath to you, young warrior, the Holy Blade of Lumaellor. With it your foes shall fall before you like rain."

Gaming: "And I bequeath to you, young warrior, the Holy Blade of . . . "

PC#1: Crap! It's a longsword! I don't HAVE Weapon Specialization: Longsword.

PC#2: Yeah, but what's the enhancement bonus on it? +3? +4? Your Greatsword is only +1.

PC#1: True, but that's what Greater Magic Weapon is for, dingus. I've got Shocking and Flaming on my greatsword. My guess is that the Holy Sword of Whatsit doesn't have them.

PC#2: Perhaps, but it'd be nice to not have to worry about Dispel Magic bringing that down.

PC#1: But how many foes do we face that have both Dispel Magic and DR? Not many at the moment. This guy wants us to go fight giants -- they don't have either.

PC#2: You make a good point. I think you'll maximize your damage potential sticking with the greatsword.

PC#1: On the other hand, I don't want to offend this guy. He's probably going to give us a reward if we kill the things he wants us to kill.

PC#2: Oh, just take it. We'll sell it in the next town.

barsoomcore · Jan 7, 2003

Fiction -- Heroes break into enemy complex and destroy Super-Space Laser Weapon, thus saving the world.

Game -- Heroes break into enemy complex and TAKE OVER Super-Space Laser and use it to write their names on the surface of the moon. Game ends in confused chaos soon after.

BiggusGeekus@Work · Jan 7, 2003

Fiction - The hero discovers a ring with occult runes inscribed on it. He wears it as a trophy of his kill and moves on

Gaming - The hero discovers a ring with occult runes inscribed on it. He then tries to fly, sees if he's harder to hit in combat, attempts to wish for money, tries to turn invisible, has the wizard cast various spells that do elemental damge to him, jumps up and down, takes a go at breating underwater ... etc until he finds out what the ring does.

Angelsboi · Jan 7, 2003

Fiction:

The evil man in a dark cloak approaches the heroes. "Thats why it would behoove you to just side with me and i promise, all the riches you want will be yours."

"NEVER EVIL SCUM!" The hero and his friends draw their weapons prepared to fight.

Game:

The evil man in a dark cloak approaches the heroes. "Thats why it would behoove you to just side with me and i promise, all the riches you want will be yours."

The heroes look at each other. "What are you offering? Girls, money, wishes?"

DarkSoldier · Jan 7, 2003

Fiction: A character gets wounded, but the other characters nurse him/her back to health.

Game: A character gets wounded to -10 hp and dies.

This is why I write fiction more often than play the game; at least I have control over everything in the game.