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Monday, 10th March, 2003, 01:20 PM #171
nit vs mirthcard
no judgement from me here, mirth was in late....nit wins, but our kind judges have included commentary for both anyway
Mirthcard vs Nitesse
Mirthcard: A adventure with no good ending, good for roleplaying, but it
might be a bit frustrating for the players.
Nitesse: Battle, blood and a new thrown weapon (stats, we want stats!)
Nitesse, Celts and Norse and a free history lesson, what do you want more!
NiTessines piece shows a lot of polish, and works well as a snap-shot of a
single battle. The implied story we're getting a glimpse of works well, as
does the decision to launch straight into the fight and hint at what we're
missing out on. Simplicity and strong stylistic choices are this stories
strength. Where NiTessine lost me a little was some of his cultural choices-
the story is strongly associated with Celt and Norse society, but for the
casual observer of such societies like myself (who largely pick such things up
through dodgy mythology books, DnD sourcebooks and Astrix comics) things like
Norsemen on Chariots following face-painted shaman seem out of place. I'll
leave it to others to argue whether this is true or not, and it's interesting
to note that if it had been a fantasy story rather than an implied historical
one, it would have been less of an issue. Perhaps some further shaping on such
elements, with more care to place them within the historical context for the
uninitiated will help prevent images of horn-helmed Vikings unloading their
roman style chariot from a longship
Mirthcard offers us an atmospheric adventure in the cold north, pitting waring
religions against one another. In many ways it takes a step away from usual
DnD tropes in style, yet keeps many of the elements we're all familiar with.
That being said, I can already see how I'd have trouble integrating it into an
ongoing campaign without ruining the flavour, explaining many of the elements
within normal DnD magic terms (such as the Tree as Entrance to the Spirit
Realm, the possessed Pater becoming "Just another avatar," etc). While I'm not
sure if this truly counts as a drawback, it would instantly force the adventure
a step further into "Something I'll run one day as a one shot" rather than
a "must have for next session." Mirthcard has referred to his submission as
incomplete, so it leaves me wondering what more he was planning as I'm
intrigued enough by this adventure as is.
Finding a winner out of these two would have been a case of splitting hairs in
many respects. From what I gather, Mirthcard missed the deadline, but I'll
offer a judges decision just in case I'm wrong or the contestants are
interested in how close it would have been. Both are fine pieces of work in
two different styles of writing, and there is no clear factor that tips the
balance in one direction or the other. In the end I give the round to
NiTessine if only because it was an immediate sense of gratification, and
because I know I couldn't live up to the potential of Mirthcards idea should I
nit wins by default and judgement....could a new champion be amongst us?
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Monday, 10th March, 2003, 01:30 PM #172
drawmack vs. sniktch
i think drawmack and i were looking at different pictures at one point at least, for i had trouble fitting the fire to the stone buildings. i do have to say i really liked the handling of the bird tho.
in contrat, i think the double headed crocodilian was mre than a little glossed over.
sniktch manages to make his plot turn heavily on 2 of the pictures, the croc and the satyr, i felt a little elt down by the dove killing not being explained, but that happens in-game all the time i guess.
i gotta give this one to sniktch, on strength of pic usage
Drawmack: revenge, murder, and rightious retribution.
Sniktch: Natures revenge. Good story, but the changeover from the druid to
the Satyr was not that strong.
Drawmack, similar stories, but drawmacks story was stronger (I just loved
The essential flaw of Ceramic DM is that there's very rarely time to refine a
submission, and that shows a great deal in Drawmack's entry. The bare bones of
this story shows a lot of promise, but it ultimately fails to deliver. After
two very strong first lines, Drawmack soon falls prey to over-description and
rushing the story. In essence, we need more time to absorb events as readers
before we're rushed on to the next. The idea behind the story is interesting,
particularly the focus on Set and his traditionally "Evil" faithful. With more
attention paid to pacing and the toning down of some of the description, this
could be a great read but at present it looses the reader by alternating
between too much information and not enough.
Bring on the berserker Satyrs . While I enjoyed Sniktch entry, it too needed
more development. Everything is neatly contained within the story, as though
it existed within a vacuum. Trouble has started, the guardian is warned and
butt is kicked. Game over. While this is fine it is the hints of background
that give life to the setting and the stories within it, even if those hints
are never explained or expanded upon it works on the imagination and brings the
story alive in the readers head. Putting some more focus into the pacing may
also help, breaking up the steady chain of events that seem to roll inevitably
forward. Like Drawmacks, Sniktch's story shows some promising bare bones in
need of refinement.
This round goes to Sniktch, although it's a fairly close call. In the end both
stories need development in similar areas, and displayed such interesting use
of the ingredients, that the decision was made on style. While Drawmack's
piece brings to mind a dark, atmospheric and brooding film, Sniktch's reads
like the fey version of a Jackie Chan flick and like Chan flicks it's easier to
look past the parts that aren't working and enjoy the rollicking good fun.
2 to 1, the winner is sniktch
Monday, 10th March, 2003, 01:36 PM #173
Gallant (Lvl 3)
Ah... Perhaps I should've made it clear when I posted the story... It was based on Sláine. I got the Mongoose book for the game only two days earlier, and, like any good setting, it got my creative juices flowing. In the setting, there is no sea between Midgard and the Celtic lands, so a chariot would be rather easier to transport.
As for the tathlum stats...
It's a small exotic weapon, does 1d6 points of bludgeoning damage, does x2 damage on a successful crit, has range increments of 10 feet, and a single tathlum weighs two pounds. By spending an Earth Power point, the maker of the tathlum (who also must be the one who slew the brain's previous owner) can throw it at a foe, gaining an attack and damage bonus equal to the previous owner's Int bonus. This power can only be invoked once, after which it is gone. The tathlum can be used as a normal weapon afterwards, though.
Monday, 10th March, 2003, 01:39 PM #174
Monday, 10th March, 2003, 01:40 PM #175
speaker vs taladas-
taladas: nice handling of the boar and the statue, but i LOVED the handling of the cup...that is the kind of pic handling that makes the contest for me
the puppet was difficult in my opinion, and it was handled pretty well too
speaker: in my opinion , better writing, altho less strength in the picture handling dept. the pictures were handled well, just without the shock taladas had
this oen was hard for me to call, but i have to go with speaker, taladas handled himself well, and if speaker had made any errors in pic handling it would have lost it for him.
Taladas vs Speaker:
Taladas: Evil wizards, polymorph and an emerging concience. Great twist,
Speaker: A very Mythical story, a fairytale, very nice!
Speaker, The more mythical story about the giant-friend was more complete,
allthough the mages revenge is very....poetic
Taladas' story starts with a very stilted rhythm that is disrupting to read.
It conveys what's happening, and the pace with which he presents the story is
great, but the consistent use of sentences that are roughly the same length
makes things very halting. He relaxes into things from time to time as the
story goes on, but the halting tone comes back to reassert itself. Some
interesting use of the pictures, with the last punishment in particular
catching me off guard.
Speakers approach has a resonance with myth that works well within his entry,
and his style is very natural and easy-flowing. I could easily see his piece
being polished to professional standards, and it makes good use of the various
pictures without feeling forced. Very, very nicely done.
I give this round to Speaker. Taladas story has some merits, but Speakers
style and approach ultimately wins out.
speaker wins unanimously, and barely
Monday, 10th March, 2003, 01:42 PM #176
barrend nobeard advances by default, altho arwink the reviewer sent this-
Barendd's piece is nicely paced, and shows a great deal of whimsy and humour in
it's recounting of the slaves and their magic frog. It has a deceptively
simple, childlike tone its recounting that works to its advantage. Where it
falls slightly is its use of this childlike tone to cram in the use of the
pictures, taking easy choices that may falter when held up against innovative
or complex uses in later rounds. Even so, this is a great read that made me
smile more than once
Monday, 10th March, 2003, 01:43 PM #177
Acolyte (Lvl 2)
Alright! I have revenge for the last time around now - score Drawmack 1 Sniktch 1 Good job, Drawmack; I'll look forward to meeting you again in a future competition (we have to have a tie-breaker sometime, if nothing else )
Bring on round 2 - hopefully I will have a little more time to work on the story this time around, as my dad flew back to Alabama last night and I have no D&D game scheduled until Saturday...
Monday, 10th March, 2003, 01:44 PM #178
next round starts after all of the winners have checked in-
barrend nobeard vs speaker
and nitessine vs sniktch
let me know when you are ready fellas
oh, and remember to thank our kind judges
Monday, 10th March, 2003, 01:48 PM #179
Gallant (Lvl 3)
Monday, 10th March, 2003, 01:48 PM #180
Acolyte (Lvl 2)
Ah, bring on NiTessine! I have anticipated this matchup ever since I read the piece he submitted in the last, aborted, Ceramic DM (while Clay was away). It will be a tough round, and I will throw myself into making the judges' decision as difficult as possible
Edit: No smack talk from me this round! My opponent has already earned my respect and I will treat him like the deadly venomous snake that he is
Last edited by Sniktch; Monday, 10th March, 2003 at 01:50 PM.