Anti-DM Tips (AKA what NOT to do!)

[Morrus]

1. Insist that all your players adopt mildly offensive stereotypical accents. Refuse to accept anything they say that isn't "in character".

[Morrus]

2. When you're unsure of something, stop the game and make your players spend a fascinating five minutes watching you read a rulebook.

[UnknownDyson]

3. Put real world races or religious groups into your game and either subjugate or disenfranchise them. I would suggest playing a colonialism setting with mature players only, as it can get very racist very quickly and might be awkward and off putting for players (especially minorities).

[Cernor]

4. Write down ideas on loose pieces of paper. If you need it, and it isn't in your binder, you will lose it.

[kalil]

5. Spend a lot of time writing a "story" for your game before it starts

[Oofta]

5.b. Write a story that assumes players will do exactly what you expect. When they don't, get into a huff and throw your binder into the trash while exclaiming "Well that​ was a waste of time!"

[Morrus]

6. Try to DM your players in real life, and assume that your in-game authority translates to real-life authority. Encourage bribes.

[pdzoch]

7. Insist the party have a certain mix of classes and races, so that they will succeed. (Otherwise, they just won't have any fun if they are not prepared for your adventure).

[Morrus]

8. Try really hard to think of reasons to say no to players. When you can't think of one, fall back on "because I said so!"

[flametitan]

Preparing everything that's in every nook and cranny. Make sure every hex on your hex map has sub hexes, and make sure those sub hexes have something there.