Bad DM stories

I guess I've been lucky when it comes to bad GMs. Almost all of my past game masters have been pretty good, with the exception of the odd convention game.

The worst DM I had wasn't all that bad, he just didn't understand the flow of a game, when there was a need to give a hint, add an NPC, or kill a storyline.

During a game of Amber, the DM roleplayed out a twenty minute conversation between four NPCs. Twenty minutes of talking to himself.

Every time a player (and there were NINE of us sitting there) said anything in character, the DM would nod and mutter "Okay", then continue reading from his script as if nothing had happened.

It goes without saying that we weren't just railroaded...we were bullet-trained.

There's a DM in my univerisity group that is about the opposite of everything I like about D&D.

He runs a custom world. With lots of custom races. And apparently the entirety of Unearthed Arcana.
He uses generic classes. And allows a huge ability score limit of 75. And you can decrease your scores to as low as 3. 3 charisma for example. No in-game consequences for this, of course.

He requires training for level-up, training to get spells, AND training for skill levels.


There's 9 players or so. Three have weird races--a half-dragon, an air/fire elemental and a Naga (custom snake person). Three are multiclassed spellcaster/meleers.

The world has 8 different "Monk" schools. A PC must be a member of one of them. These schools have PrCs that are overpowered compared to others, so the PCs would take them.

All PCs have the Vow of Poverty. They (apparently) think that this means they can only have weapons and ammuntion, not light sources or rope or similar equipment.

They have very few magic items.

They are 15th level (on average) at last count.

The party is not balanced. There is one full spellcaster, and the rest of the party is straight melee focused, excepting one archer character.

The campaign is a mix of the two biggest cliches--"evil is invading the world" and "escort the artifact."

There are three known Monk school full spellcasters above third level. Two of them are in the party and are ~15th level.

If an encounter is not equal to the PCs level, it is dead in about two rounds. If it is equal to their level, half the party is neutralized or rendered unconscious until the other half neutralizes the threat.

My little brother played for a while and the other PCs couldn't understand the idea of "stay out of the wizards way"--they frequently moved forward into melee and made it hard for him to use his nifty area spells.

Edit:

And they are bloodthirsty. When my little brother (playing the "wizard") was trying to figure a way to transport a non-teleportable magic-sucking (~5' radius) personality suppressing artifact held by a party member without having to go by water (fire elemental PC) or go underground through this "Underpass" underround highway thinghy, one player got really antsy...couldn't wait for five minutes for him to think for a bit.

And none of them brought light sources. When they knew they were going underground for an extended session. Never mind half of them have darkvision.

VirgilCaine said:

There's a DM in my univerisity group that is about the opposite of everything I like about D&D.

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After reading your post, I died a little inside.

Well, there was this one guy who was running a homebrew. He made up his own adventures and ran us through them. He was constantly reading out the hidden monsters or treasure in the room! He also had everyone start off as close friends. On one adventure, we were to deliver a package to the much beloved aunt of one of the characters that we all had fond memories of. While looking for her in the large mansion she called home, some of the players kept trying to wander off with valuables. The GM would say nothing and I would ask them (in character) what they thought they were doing and they would put things back. Ultimately, we had to leave in a hurry with the place burning down around us right after finding the aunts body. After it was over, the GM went on and on about all the treasure we had missed. I felt the need to remind him that HE told us we were in the house of someone we cared about and that one doesn't usually ransack such places, at least until AFTER we find them dead. That shut him up pretty quick. I didn't stay in that game past a few sessions.

There was one DM I had who would harshly penalize you if you didn't run YOUR character according to how she thought you should be running it. We had captured some prisoners and during the night one of them had somehow managed to escape, with out any of us noticing. Wishing to forstall any more escapes my Chaotic Neutral Bard hamstrung the remaining prisoner. This some how offended my character's True Neutral God (Oghma from the Celtic Mythos) so much, that I was struck by a lightning bolt from the blue. I'm still trying to figure that one out.

Many years ago, my buddy and I were in a desperate search for a new group after our's had fallen apart. We tried a local gaming group that had an actual permanent club (physical location) and membership dues. It seemed on its surface a very nice set up.

we asked if we could sit in on a session (or just observe) before we decided to become dues paying members. They were totally ok with this approach.

So we showed up that Saturday night with no less than 17 people sitting around a huge U shaped table and 1 (count it), 1 DM.

We skeptically took our seats. As we were joing a campaign already in progress, we each brought in a 4th lvl PC, 1st edition, one level below the majority of the party. Our PCs were wisked into the dungeon the party had already been exploring. I guess when you are a group of 17 PCs (and henchman), two 4th level random PCs showing up just doesn't stretch reality much.

So after playing for about an hour and half (more like sitting and listening people travel a grand total of 200' in an hour and half) we find out selves in a huge chamerb with a two story statue of a dragon or Behir or something along those lines.....don't recall.

Well the inevitable train runs right smack into the frickin' obvious train and the statue animates with the whole legion in the room. The group, in true hero fashion, drops everything and runs for the nearest egress.

The DM ( I forgot he was there) gives everyone a free shot at grabbing something from the piles of treasure strewn about (forgot those were there too).

My PC grabs and runs in quiet orderly fashion.

When we get out of the room (because everyone knows giant dragon statue thingys dont chase PCs out fo the room), the GM beigns telling everyone what they grabbed.

When I was informed that my 4th lvl half-evlen ftr/thief just picked up a +4 defender bastard sword my buddy and I decided to call it a night.

Monty Haul is one thing. Monty Haul Mob style is just rediculous.

My worst GM (well, not the GM actually) was at a small town gaming con. The flyer for the adventure said this was a return to the Caves of Chaos (1e) as the "Official D&D Adventure". Ok, it specifically said our characters had been there before at low levels and now we were high-mid level. So we took our old maps with us. The GM thought this was cool, the adventure's writer didn't. We started the adventure (with the maps) and before long someone wanted to cast a spell. That's when we were told about the super mana point system we were using for this 'official' adventure! After some grumbling, we went along with it. As we went as a group, and the guys I usually play with are pretty savvy, it wasn't too long til we figured out how to tweek the system in our favor. Now, the actual GM was ok, but the adventure writer kept barging in to try to roadblock us. (Once haveing a flying, sci-fi armored character who was not in the written adventure [the GM so informed us later] attack the party. Someone cast a Knock spell [is that the one?] on him. Once we read the spell description to him [unlocks and unfastens all locks, closures, etc.] he plummeted to his death.) Shortly thereafter we cast some death-dealing cloud spell, followed by an Earthquake spell, followed by Teleportation out of the vally. We then waited until we got our mana points back and did it again. and again, and again, and again. End of adventure.

Amazingly, I guess, we then found ourselves asked to play another of this writer's adventures for the title of best role playing group at the con. We turned down the invitation.

I've played with a lot of different GMs over the years, covering the entire range of potential GMs. I'd say approximately 15 GMs locally over the last 28 years, including friends.

The worst three;

Old Friend: Railroader with no sense of reasonability.
a> Party is harried by a Wizard named "Synch O'Phant". Yes, it was that bad. Guy used to pop in at random, blast the party and make his escape. Over and over without any apparent reason. Always some kind of Deux Ex Machina escape, even from a grapple, even when we "killed" him.
b> Kingdom of 1300 people. Capital city of 1000, small farming town of 300 located several hundred miles away. Nothing else anywhere around. Then we encounter a "patrol" of 100 soldiers. Then we find several hundred guards and soldiers in the capital city.
c> We decide to leave this dusty, useless port (the above capital). No ship will transport us for any price. We cannot buy a ship. We attempt to steal one. The entire crew is on deck, armed to the teeth, at the end of the first round. In the middle of the night Entire galleys of soldiers are making their way across the harbor and boarding us in a single round. The ship starts on fire. We're down to a handful of hitpoints, but it's obvious that the GM WILL NOT KILL US. So we keep fighting. GM says "The ship has burned to the water line and is about to sink. What do you do?" We wad up character sheets, throw them at him and scream "we drown!". End of game. For years afterward he cannot understand why people keep making excuses not to play in his next game.

Random Kid: At a FLGS many years past. Something like 18 players in the next game over, this kid struggling to get any players. Me and one other guy agree to play. His "world" consists of ONE city, ONE road and ONE dungeon. We are attacked left and right, cannot even get past the first encounter at the dungeon, so we retreat to the city. Everyone, and I mean *everyone* including the guards themselves, are harassing us and attempting to rob us. We go to the ONE Inn. Innkeeper demands a fortune for a crappy, filthy room, threatens to kill us if we don't pay. Other player wisely decides he has other things to do and walks away. I stay for more of this abuse for another hour, trying to talk to the boy about his crappy, abusive world and why anyone would want to play with him. He doesn't get it. I quit and walk away, causing him to very nearly break down and cry. The next week he's right there again trying to recruit new players and getting upset that I and a good half-dozen other people intercede anytime he hooks a new victim.

My rules, my way" Very recently, I responded to a players wanted ad for a local game. The GM seemed happy, initially anyways, for me to join. Was a bit tricky on getting me the address, which was my first clue. When I show up, he seems surprised and says "I didn't think you would show up". Three times in the first half hour. Then goes on to tell me how much of a stickler for the rules he is, telling me he's very firm on the Frostburn rules for extreme cold and he's going to watch my Wizard's material components like a hawk. He tells me a tale of a past player who kept casting a minor spell that required a component that could not be obtained in the cold lands he was playing in, so he never let that player cast that spell again. Ok, so I take Eschew Materials. His angry glare could have melted the arctic icepack. Next we're running a 4 player 1st level party (Cleric, Rogue, Monk and Wizard) through an adventure WAY TOO TOUGH for our group. When I start figuring things out, he accuses me of having read the adventure. Then Mr. I-Own-every-rulebook-in-existence-and-will-keep-you-to-it makes a silly mistake on a Tumble check. Then he kills my character and very nearly TPKs the entire group until pulling a Deux Ex Machina save out of his ass. Later on, I e-mail him a new character and point out the tumble error. Mr. IOERIEAWKYTI angrily responds that I am a "rules lawyer" and that he prefers to play under more loose rules. Which makes no sense given how he so adamantly lectured me at the beginning of play about how much of a stickler for the rules he is. GOOD RIDDANCE.

Pielorinho said:

In a fantasy world, I'd play an Amish-inspired religion as immensely mistrustful of most magic, including any divine magic other than healing spells. And they'd be absolutely nonviolent, therefore poor adventuring stock (although an ex-Amish character could be fun)[/hijack]

(Hoping that my linking this discussion back to fantasy keeps it from being forbidden religious discussion)

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Of course, I think the Amish are possibly the least likely group to be online, let alone reading this particular website to be offended by it, so I think it's okay...