The Fine Line: Roleplaying vs. Fantasizing

The topic of what is and isn't roleplaying has been done to death, but never is it mentioned the problem I've experienced with players who are, at the heart of it, good actors and writers, but selfish and indulgent roleplayers, in fact they aren't roleplayers at all. It's a problem I've come to call Roleplaying vs. Fantasizing.

Roleplaying, as I see it, are players acting and interacting as their characters within the confines of the game or story, doing their best to make them function on an individual level, but also on a larger level given other characters and plots. There is a sense of cooperative co-storytelling in roleplaying, one that doesn't compromise the character but at the same time allows for a shared creative process among players and DM.

Fantasizers are players who act and interact as characters, but are selfish in their performance, often times irrational in their reactions, motives or interactions so as to capture the essence of their fantasy, that is who they wish they were. There is usually little cooperation involved with these players, though on a unique basis one can fit quite well into a gaming group, until confronted with another fantasizer. At that point, both their preconceived notions almost always clash and causes not only a game meltdown, but aggression beyond the game (partially because the character is their fantasy, and marring someone's perfect notion on something is always taken personally).

The problem is the game itself should not be a vehicle for fantasizers to experience their dream self. The game should be a creative vehicle outside the realm of selfish, private imaginings and more for a shared experience of interesting characters. That isn't saying a player can't put himself into his character, of course he can, it's essential for a great roleplaying, but he can't be the character on all its levels and he cannot take it personally.

But what exactly is a fantasizer's fantasy beyond what they wish they could be brought forward in an inappropriate venue like a game table? Some of the most common occurrences of fantasizing include a supernaturally attractive character who assumes she can spin and toy with any NPC's heart. There are also those quiet, brooding loner types, sometimes Anime-esque. The concepts in and of themselves aren't inherently fantasizer (done to death, but not fantasizer) until they are then played badly. Cliches are a quick road for fantasizing, because a player has come into a game with preconceived notions about himself, how the world will treat him, and how the players will treat him. That quickly turns a brooding, cloaked character expecting to be mysterious into an incredibly annoying thorn for the combination of seemingly random actions topped with forever being a stranger because of his reticence.

Fantasizers will often have the same common thread between all alternate characters. The same player will again go for a gorgeous woman, a hooded man with a hidden weapon, or a guy with a mean streak. Any attempt at something different will inevitably revert to their former fantasy and any critique on said concept leads to hostility. To them it may seem like choosing simple options that they prefer, roleplaying even, but really they are playing into a mentally preconceived notion of a character and preconceived interactions with other characters and the world.

At that point, when the player begins trying to control how the character is interacted with or perceived, at that point I think they cross over from roleplaying to fantasizing. They begin steering the world and those elements beyond the ken of a player to fit their fantasy. Its no longer is a character at that point, but an extension of themselves, a delusion meant to give the player some sort of acted out satisfaction.

With all of this said, maybe fantasizers aren't a problem for some DMs or roleplayers. I suppose it's all how you approach it. Maybe you don't even see a difference between the two, which probably means you could get along just fine. I guess it ultimately boils down to the age old dilemma of trouble at the game table between DM and player/s or player and player. As always, the problem must be addressed immediately. Roleplaying vs. Fantasizing is just a possible cause I've picked up on and think has some validity. Thoughts?