Whether or not you’ve read the classic today’s Mythological Figure is from you know who he is because of the massive creature of the sea he endlessly hunts after. I’m talking up that peg-legged mad-eyed obsessed sailor extraordinaire known as Captain Ahab!
Epic Monsters has taken on aircraft-cursing gremlins, Cthulhu and his whole gang, the Mothman, Baba Yaga, Dracula, the World Turtle—but none are the type of challenge posed by today’s subject. Meet the ridiculous onocentaur!
This entry in Mythological Figures is going way, way back, providing a build for Gilgamesh’s best buddy. If you’ve ever heard the myth then you know I mean the beast-man made from clay, that fellow who can’t be kept down: Enkidu!
Today Epic Monsters is taking a look at the working man’s man of steel, a corporatist product of fakelore from the Steel City that never quite found its way entirely into the realm of America’s mythology. If you already know who it is, you get a gold star because this one is pretty obscure: Joe Magarac!
This entry in Epic Monsters is the biggest of the big. It’s huge. It can’t be stressed enough how colossal it is. Absolutely massive! The biggest thing that will ever appear in the column—the Earth-carrying World Turtle!
Today’s entry in Epic Monsters isn’t the most epic yet, but it’s on its way there: a portrait of modern religion’s greatest villain as he plummets from the heavens, that dastardly falling angel Lucifer! This is the first if three increasingly powerful builds: Falling, Fallen, and Lord of Hell.
“My high charms work, and these, mine enemies, are all knit up in their distractions. They now are in my power.” If you’re thinking that I’m talking about the central character in Shakespeare’s The Tempest, you know today’s entry in Mythological Figures is Prospero!
“That, if I then had waked after long sleep, will make me sleep again | and then in dreaming, the clouds me thought would open | and show riches ready to drop upon me, that when I waked I cried to dream again.” If you know who today’s entry in Mythological Figures is already, unlike me you’d have answered that televised trivia show question with The Tempest and won the game: Caliban!
“Then I must be thy lady: but I know | When thou hast stolen away from fairy land… | Your buskin'd mistress and your warrior love, | To Theseus must be wedded, and you come | To give their bed joy and prosperity.” The thespians among you likely already know who I’m quoting, but to everyone else take heed for today Mythological Figures considers the Faerie Queen Titania!
Today’s Epic Monster entry is surprisingly, terrifyingly historical, drawn from the mythologies of the Māori—a monstrous bird able to kill creatures as big as 500 pounds. If you said Haast’s eagle you’d be right, but we’re calling it by its ancient name: the poukai!