My name is Aldoraine and I'm putting together a special team, and I need me some soldiers. Elven-blooded soldiers. Now, y'all might've heard rumors about the armada happening soon. Well, we'll be leaving a little earlier. We're gonna be dropped into elf country, dressed as civilians. And once we're in enemy territory, as a bushwhackin' guerrilla army, we're gonna be doin' one thing and one thing only... killin' drows.
Now, I don't know about y'all, but I sure as hell didn't come down from the mountains, cross thousands o' miles o' water, fight my way through half the known world and jump out of a frickin' flyin' ship to teach the drows lessons in humanity. Drow ain't got no humanity. They're the foot soldiers of an elf-hatin', mass murderin' maniac and they need to be dee-stroyed. That's why any and every every sunvabitch carryin' the symbol of Lolth, they're gonna die.
We will be cruel to the drows, and through our cruelty they will know who we are. And they will find the evidence of our cruelty in the disemboweled, dismembered, and disfigured bodies of their brothers we leave behind us. And the drows won't not be able to help themselves but to imagine the cruelty their brothers endured at our spells, and our arrows, and the edge of our blades. And the drow will be sickened by us, and the drow will talk about us, and the drow will fear us. And when the drows close their eyes at night and they're tortured by their subconscious for the evil they have done, it will be with thoughts of us they are tortured with.
Sooooound good?
But I got a word of warning for all you would-be warriors. When you join my command, you take on debit. A debit you owe me personally. Each and every one under my command owes me one hundred drow scalps. And I want my scalps. And all y'all will git me one hundred drow scalps, taken from the heads of one hundred dead drows. Or you will die tryin'.
Briefing for your deployment, recruit . . .
When: When Aldoraine gets enough people (4 to 8).
Send me an e-mail to start killin' drows. Lasts until participants meet Aldoraine's debit of 100 drow scalps or die trying. Time and day of play to be arranged, but Sunday afternoon/evening is impossible for me.
Where: Wherever is most convenient for everyone.
System and books: D&D
4e. Only PHB necessary, but players can use material from PHB2, Eberron Players Handbook and Forgotten Realms Players Handbook.
Setting: Eberron.
Khorvaire, around 990YK - when the first airships are being deployed into service.
Themes: The Last War (ECS p.10)The Shadow War (ECS p.13), Fantasy Noir (ECS p.19).
Level: Heroic tier. Starting at about 4th level (slightly higher if fewer than 5 players).
Style: Tarantinesque - quirky dialogue, twisted protagonists, lots of beautifully described graphic violence, and lots and lots and
lots of cussin'.
House rules and such: Not really. I want to get used to building and running encounters for
4e. I'll probably use the PC background rules too. But I will award bonus XP for the Drow Kill of the Week.
Note: I'm too broke to buy battlemats and minis, so we'll have to share or improvise.
)
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