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Thread: The Screamer - L4W News
Saturday, 21st March, 2009, 06:31 PM #1
The Screamer - L4W News
“Hear ye! hear ye!”
“Read about mayor Brunt’s recent tax scam to butter up Daunton’s Founding families! Hear about oni incursions in the Valley of Bone after portals at the Isle of Opposition scrambled! Learn about the new geyser at Bacarte after a group of “heroes” messed up a ritual to access the fabled Depthworld! Gawk at the chilling tales from survivors of pirate captain Grogmarrow’s latest raid at the coast of Mykonos!”
“Hot off the enchanted press, bringing you the latest in shocking revelations and outrageous scandals from across the Transitive Isles!”
“This is the Screamer!”
The Screamer is a news source for the Living 4th Edition setting. All members are encouraged to post stories about recent events, preferably in-character in the form of a colorful anecdote. Suggested articles include:
- Summaries of recently concluded exciting encounters.
- Recaps of completed and ongoing adventures.
- New competitions, arrivals, and adventure openings at the Hanged Man.
- Significant in-game developments that could potentially impact the setting at large.
A synopsis of adventures can be found here.
The Screamer will also keep the community informed about OOC news such as recently approved proposals of character options, changes to the charter, etc. If manageable, news items will try to be indexed in this post in an organized manner.
Last edited by L4W Facilitator; Monday, 29th March, 2010 at 03:58 PM.
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Saturday, 21st March, 2009, 07:26 PM #2
Acolyte (Lvl 2)
Raid on Marn Mansion
“It was just… just horrible!
“So I was just minding my own business, right? None of that pick-pocketing load of troll dung the guards claim. Just plain old helping ladies across the street for a penny.” [From the looks of it, helping himself to the pennies as well. – Ed.]
“So I run into this old friend of mine, right? Well, actually, she ran into me. Boot prints all over her back, so I figure she’s fleeing from someone. So I ask: Who you running from, Tiptoes? She rambles on about this crazy gang raiding a mansion, something about liquefied organs and mutilated elves.”
“So I’m thinking I got’s to check it out. Perhaps there’s people that need to be
plunderedhelped! Being a responsible community servant, right? So I followed ‘Toes trail back to the place, crawled over the wall, and sure enough it’s a fresh battlefield! Blood and broken arrows in the grass, goblin corpses strewn about. All of them looted thoroughly I’ll tell ya’.”
“But when I found the elf corpse… Whoa! At least, I think it was an elf. Kind of hard to tell, considering his skin was flayed off, his nipples and manhood was a bloody mess, his eyes were useless, his thumbs were missing, he had thorns all over, he was bound and gagged with a snotty rag... oh, and he was hamstringed.”
“So that’s when I cleared off. Whoever did that, I don’t wanna’ mess with ‘em!”
[Encounter started here]
Last edited by Dunamin; Saturday, 21st March, 2009 at 07:44 PM.
Sunday, 22nd March, 2009, 08:25 AM #3
Waghalter (Lvl 7)
THE SCREAMER Local Gossip Section E1
Overheard in "The Hanged Man"
Crazy Little fella comesh in the bar, you know I crossh the shtreet to avoid the crazy dwarf! Dwarf writesh on the threshold, shcribbles a shpiral.
Then walks in one of those F, FFF, F, Ella... Ella drinks! Trishtan. Cold, didn't even bat an eye at the crazy dwarf.
Ha'lf is readin in the corner, doesn't even notice th'woman setting table on fire, makin tea! Fire! OR the guy chucking throwing stars into th'dartsh board!
Show'sh already amayshing in th'bar, when shome foppish gold shpoon in th'mouth guy walks in... Come to find out hish name ish Regin-Uh, PSH Nobles.
Orders a bunch of food, and drink, lotsha drink, and sits on hish lonesome, until the crazy dwarf shtompsh over to his ssheat, eats the food from infront 'is fayshe...
After that it starts ta get hazy, because the bartender is hollering about getting a room, think he just, shaw how much money Regin-UH would pay for privy fashilities... ... ... Oh hazy, because they gotsha private room... and left all the food and drink at the table... So'sh I shays to the bartender, "You mind?" and he Shays "No."
I remember before the drink conshumed me, a dangerous looking, muddy woman and an awful smelling, robed guy walk in...
The last thingsh I remember, are all of'em leaving, shome before othersh, Regin-UH had contractsh in hish handsh.
And now I'm waking up and you're here... What are you writing about... You're a shhKribbler... ShhhhKribbler...
Adventure Started Here
Last edited by CaBaNa; Sunday, 22nd March, 2009 at 08:40 AM.
Sunday, 22nd March, 2009, 12:47 PM #4
Novice (Lvl 1)
"A rumor coming from the diplomatic quarter has recently been confirmed. An envoy from the Kingdom of Jade (The aide to the Iron General no less!) has been spotted in the city."
"Attempts to interview or speak to the aid have been rebuffed by that all to common Dragonborn meatshield mentality. This reporter didn't even make it through the front doors! Despite their best attempts however the aide was recently spotted heading into the Hanged Man carrying a large scroll bearing the General's personal seal."
"A secret source inside the embassy had this to say 'Most of us are not privy to the comings and goings of one so high up as the aide. But I did overhear two of the commanders talking in the mess hall one night after a few too many glasses of Imperial Fire Wine. They were arguing about why they thought the General would seek outside assistance and what this could mean for career soldiers like themselves. I knew right away that the people of Daunton needed this piece of information." So there you have it folks, it would seem the Iron General is seeking some sort of outside assistance in their ongoing battle against the 'darkness'. For the screamer this is your political correspondant Lanessa Longtooth.
2+2=4 Fate is certain.
LEB Judge Circa 2009
Sunday, 22nd March, 2009, 11:58 PM #5
LATEST NOBLE SQUABBLE: WINNIE VS. CELIA
Celia D'Orren was spotted coming out of the Dirty Deva last night with her new beau. Spotted by Darwinia L'Irkash, that is! Celia bumped into Winnie and her entourage in the street in front of the tavern, and Winnie went ballistic! Before her minders dragged her away, she was heard to call Celia "faithless", "false-hearted", and "a cheating WHO"ops! We can't print that last one in a family paper! A lovers' quarrel? We were sure hoping so - it'd sell a lot more papers! But it seems dear Winnie was just looking out for her cousin, Lukas, who you might remember was going around with Celia for a few weeks before he suddenly stopped calling. Winnie, dear - it looks from here like lovely Lukas ditched Celia, not the other way around! We're glad you've finally decided to start standing by your family, couldn't you have done it with a little more dignity? "His bones aren't even cold?" Just a little over the top? It seems some people never change!
And speaking of never changing, if you guessed that Celia's new paramour is a handsome young guard captain - you're right! But it's not Woe Chinua this time! Yes, we're as shocked as you are! Who is this mysterious man in uniform? Our intrepid reporter didn't recognize him, so if anyone out there knows, drop us a line! We'd love to find out!
Monday, 23rd March, 2009, 02:02 AM #6
Scout (Lvl 6)
A confidential source reported on a disturbance in the 'court' of Daunton's high class dragonborn from the Jade Empire, Madame Redscale. Her daily routine was disturbed when an aide interrupted a meeting with several of Daunton's upper crust. The aide whispered something to the mistress of mysterious dragonborn turned her scales pale and sent her into a quivering rage.
As the assembly left her chambers, our informant was lucky enough to overhear her command to the aide who had brought her the obviously distressing news: "Find those responsible, and END them!" We'll be sure to bring you any further facts as we uncover them.
Monday, 23rd March, 2009, 10:55 PM #7
Lost an heirloom?
Need to track down a missing debtor?
Can't figure out which devil stole your soul?
Want to dig up the dirt on your soon-to-be ex-spouse?
Solving mysteries in mysterious ways!
Doddoddod is a licensed and fully bonded private investigator for the Isle of Daunton.
Under no conditions or terms of employment is Doddoddod obligated to leave his home while conducting an investigation. The employer agrees that Doddoddod's semi-trained and quasi-professional staff will handle all in-field investigations and inquiries, as well as conduct all communication to or from Doddoddod.
Doddoddod's semi-trained and quasi-professional staff are not licensed and fully-bonded private investigators for the Isle of Daunton.
Satisfaction not guaranteed.
Tuesday, 24th March, 2009, 01:23 AM #8
Last edited by KenHood; Saturday, 28th March, 2009 at 01:39 PM.
Monday, 30th March, 2009, 03:12 AM #9
Acolyte (Lvl 2)
"Hey! Hey you! C'mere, lemme tell ya a story. You heard o' Gouki, right? 'Course you have, ain't nobody never heard o' Gouki and his Iron whasits. They run the Iron Ring, and some say that the profits from his steetfights flow all the way back to the Iron General in the Kingdom o' Jade. Alla his fights are to the death, and he keeps the bodies, too; sells 'em to Rinch and the Ab-Dead."
"'Course, anyone who's anyone'll tell ya that there ain't no REAL Iron Ring. Not liter'ly, anyways. 'S just a word used ta describe them organized fights that Gouki's thugs run. If'n ya see a pair a guys hittin' each other in the dead o' night, and there's a big crowd watchin' an' hootin' and hollarin', 's a safe bet that yer lookin' at a match in the Iron Ring. But let me tell you; there IS an Iron Ring. One for the high class fights, and Gouki himself personally judges it."
"'How?', you ask? 'How can such an arena not've been shut down by the guard long time ago?' Well, I'll tell ya. Gouki, he's got this chain, right? A magic chain. A big ol' chain, linked together in a circle. When it's spread full on a flat surface an' the right words is said, it becomes more'n just a chain on the ground. Iron bars rise up into a dome, the insides covered in wicked spikes. You understand? Gouki's got himself a portable arena! S'what lets him stay two steps ahead o' the guard."
"Anyway, this was a few nights ago. Gouki's fights bring in a pretty high-class crowd, rich folk bettin' their ill-gotten gains on exotic mercenaries choppin' each other up. So there's this fight, right? Some hired hob from Bacarte takin' on a fancy death-speaker from the Valley of Bone. You know the type, right? Weird face paint, shrunken heads hangin' from his staff, all the works. And they're fightin', and the shaman's got the upper hand. Suddenly, the shaman looks weaker, and the hob takes advantage of it to run him through with his sword. Now, the crowd goes wild, but Gouki? He stands up from his throne and calls a halt to the fight. Calls a halt to the fight! Can ya believe it? Nobody EVER calls a halt to a fight in the Iron Ring. But Gouki orders the cage down, and goes to inspect the body. Sure enough, there was a poisoned dart stickin' out o' his side."
"Now, there ain't many rules in the Iron Ring, but no outside help is one o' 'em. His boys comb the crowd, and two guys get pushed forward. One is a female hob, some emissary from the Merchants on whose behalf the hob in the ring was fightin'. The other is this tiny goblin feller, holdin' a blowgun and lookin' like he'd seen a ghost. Its the four of 'em in the ring; Gouki and the three cheatin' goblins. Gouki orders the cage be raised. The crowd, they go NUTS! Gouki's gonna take on three goblins all by hisself! The bars raise up, the dome is sealed at the top, and the fight's on. The goblins fan out, surroundin' him."
"Now, if you ain't never seen Gouki before, lemme tell you; the man is big. BIG big. Bigger'n yer average size goliath, I'd say. Bald, too. Bulging with muscles, wearin' nothin' but this weird skirt-robe-thing. I'm told its some kinda thing from the Kingdom o' Jade, ceremonial dress for honorable combat and whatnot."
"So they're in the ring, right? And for a minute r'two, they just don't move. The goblins is scared, ya see? 'Specially the little one, he's shakin' up somethin' FIERCE. Anyway, eventually the little guy finds his nerve and loads another dart into his blowgun. He spits the thing at Gouki, and get this: the man catches the dart in the air. Swear on my mother's grave, god rest her soul, I'm telling you the truth. The man caught the dart out of the air, and threw it back at the goblin. Caught him right below his right eye, through and through, hittin' a guy in the croud, which is goin' NUTS, by the by, they're eatin' this stuff up. One down, two to go."
"A'fore the fancy hob merc can respond, Gouki's right there, towerin' in front o' him. Gouki, he don't even make a fist, he just takes his open palm and shoves it into the merc's chest. The hob stumbles back, straight into the spikes that line the dome. Poor guy gets skewered right there and then, stuck on the spikes. The fella can't get hisself down, so he just hangs there, slowly bleedin' to death."
"There's only one left now, and she looks mighty pissed. She reaches into her fancy robes, pulls out a dagger, and just plain charges at Gouki, screamin' at the top o' her lungs. Gouki just stands there, hands folded across his chest, waitin'. Once she gets close, he grabs her wrist, and she stops dead in her tracks. Then, he does the weirdest thing, and I swear this is true. Slowly, gently, he guides the dagger into him, the blade sheathin' itself in his chest. And his face! Unflinchin', I swear! Like he didn't even feel it goin' in. His grip tightens, and the hob lets go o' the dagger's hilt."
"Gouki rips the dagger from his chest, and in a flash he's behind her, one hand around her neck, the other clasped on her chin. The crowd is deathly silent now, they know that's comin' next, and they wanna hear it. Gouki, he whispers somethin' into that hob's ear, and her face goes white. Whatever it was that Gouki told her, it scared her more than the prospect o' death. Gouki snaps the hob's neck-CRRRICK- and the croud goes nuts."
"Anyway, that's what happened a few nights ago in the Iron Ring. Crazy stuff, huh!"
Clever signature goes here
Saturday, 4th April, 2009, 04:57 PM #10
Punched your dad in the face
and took your mom to dinner!
Are you [insert gender/species appropriate term here] enough for TURTLEDOME!?