Barbarian Archetype: Wild Soul [PEACH]

I've made the following changes:

I agree with you guys about the parry, so I replaced it with a Retaliation ability.

I made Throat Punch one of the Debilitating Strike options, and I've added Boxed Ears, and Head Injury to the list of Debilitating Strike options.

I've also broken up Unfettered Aggression into two abilities (for the sake of presentation). Unfettered Aggression is the name of the ability that lets you attack on closing with a foe. Ferocious Defense is the name of the ability that lets you attack when a foe closes with you.

I'll be posting the changes as soon as I finish the (sorely needed) flavor text to go with it.

I think you should combine Boxed Ears and Head Injury and they should inflict the Stunned condition - KISS applies. Injured Ribs seems a little too strong - I think a temporary level or two of Exhaustion might work better.

There is only one ability left that rolls a die. Seems appropriate to not call it momentum die anymore but momentum. You can just make the dice a part of the brutality option.

I am going to comment as I read thru, and then pull it together at the end. I specifically did not read anyone else's comments so that I come at it without preconceived notions. If I don't mention something someone else said don't take that as disagreement with them, but rather that they might be more observant than I was.

First point - your subject says Fighter archetype, may want to change that.

MechaPilot said:

Bestial Nature
While raging, you have disadvantage on Intelligence and Charisma checks, except for those made to intimidate others. Additionally, your rages overwhelm you to the point you can barely speak, preferring one- or two-syllable words and animalistic grunting and yelling.

Click to expand...

Good ribbon, though since you need to either attack or take damage to keep raging, you rarely will have you action available to make checks. Still, sets the scene well.

MechaPilot said:

Momentum
When you choose this archetype at 3^rd level, you learn to harness the relentlessness & brutality of anger and adrenaline. While raging, at the end of your turn, if you made at least one successful melee attack, you gain one momentum die, which is a d4. If you made at least one melee attack that was a critical hit, you gain two momentum dice. If you didn’t attack during your turn, you lose one momentum die. You can have no more than three momentum dice at any one time. If your rage ends, any remaining momentum dice are immediately lost.
Spending momentum dice allows you to perform the following abilities:

Brutality: When you deal damage in melee combat you may spend one or more momentum dice and add the result to your damage roll.

Fearsome: When you kill a foe, as a bonus action you can spend a momentum die to try to intimidate one of that foe’s allies within 30 feet of you. The chosen foe must attempt a Wisdom saving throw. The DC of the Wisdom saving throw is 8 + proficiency modifier + Cha modifier. On a failed saving throw, the foe becomes frightened. At the end of each of its turns, the foe can repeat the saving throw to try to end the effect. On a successful saving throw, the target has disadvantage on its next attack.
You can affect more than one foe by spending one die per foe you want to intimidate. You can’t use this ability on a foe if it didn’t see you kill its ally.

Ferocious Defense: When a creature enters the area you threaten, you can spend two momentum dice and your reaction to make an attack of opportunity against it.

Revenge: When a foe within 5 feet of you makes a melee attack that damages you or any of your allies within 5 feet of you, as a reaction you can spend two momentum dice to make a melee attack against that enemy.

Swift: As a bonus action you may spend one or more momentum dice to increase your base movement speed by 10 feet per die spent. The increased rate of movement lasts until the end of your turn.

Unfettered Aggression: When you move close enough to an enemy to make a melee attack against it, you can spend two momentum dice and your bonus action to make one melee attack against it.

Click to expand...

Renewable resource, but one you don't start any combat with so you can't nova early on. And only available in combats you rage -- nothing during other combats. That balance works for me.

I think there are too many options for quick play. They're cool, I wouldn't suggest trimming. Perhaps pick 3 to start and gain another at two other levels. Oh, and the wording could be read that if you crit you get 3 momentum - one for a successful melee attack, and two for rolling a crit. I'd touch it up slightly to make sure it's what you want. It is also unclear if you gain Momentum if you crit when taking an attack on someone else's turn. Another small benefit of starting with fewer is make it less powerful for cherrypicking with multiclassing.

I like them all, want to talk about two.

Brutality I worried if it wasn't giving you enough, but rereading it to see it's chosen after the hit like a paladin's smite puts it back into perspective.

Fearsome is perhaps the most powerful of them with both a great effect and a good ability of a successful save - but the DC is off CHR which is not usually an oft-raised Barbarian ability. I'll be watching while I read if CHR is a focus.

MechaPilot said:

Perpetual Motion
At 6^th level, you don’t lose a momentum die if you use your action to dash instead of attack.

Click to expand...

Cool power, not sure if it's enough for a level. If you do go for a limited selection of Momentum powers, this would be a good level to get another. If not, some out-of-rage/out-of-combat ability that helps reinforce the descriptive theme. (Or both.)

MechaPilot said:

Improved Momentum Dice
At 10^th level, your momentum dice become d6s. At 18^th level they become d8s.

Click to expand...

Cool. My only comment is that at 10th, the other barbarian subclasses give abilities that can be used outside rage. This isn't a problem, just a comment. At this point, with 4 rages a day, you are likely raging in the majority of encounters anyway.

MechaPilot said:

Crushing Savagery
At 14^th level, your savagery and brutality allows you to damage your foes’ bodies, temporarily impairing them. You gain the Debilitating Strike ability, see below.

Debilitating Strike: As an action, you can spend three momentum dice to make a single attack roll. If the attack is a success, you deal damage normally for the attack, and the target must make a Constitution saving throw with a DC of 8 + your proficiency modifier + your Strength modifier. On a failed saving throw, you inflict an injury on the enemy. The enemy can repeat the saving throw at the end of each of its turns, throwing off the effect with a successful saving throw. Choose from the following injuries:

• Boxed Ears: The target’s speed is halved, and it’s deafened.
• Head Injury: The target has disadvantage on Intelligence, Wisdom and Charisma checks, as well as on all Intelligence saving throws.
• Injured Arm: The target drops whatever it’s holding in the injured arm, and it has disadvantage on attack rolls and ability checks that require it to use the injured arm.

• Injured Leg: The target’s speed is halved, and it has disadvantage on Dexterity saving throws and any ability checks or attack rolls that require it to use the injured leg.

• Injured Ribs: The target has disadvantage Strength and Constitution saving throws, and Strength ability checks.
• Throat Punch: The target can’t speak or breathe.

Click to expand...

I admire your restraint - often when PEACH I see either features that are too powerful by themselves, or are all multipliers of each other. This one, in having to give up the bonus of Extra Attack as well as only usable after the combat has been going (to get 3 Momentum), and a debuff that gives saves every round (a good balance for no Concentration). Throat Punch seems really good, and many others can pare well with group dynamics, but as a 14th level ability I would expect it to have meat to it.

Conclusion
From a balance perspective I think you did a good job, maybe a few places I'd tweak the power level up as mentioned above. Oh, and there isn't the CHR focus elsewhere that would make me concerned about Fearless being too good, so that's still on point.

On thinking back, I think I'd like to add another ability at 14th - when you rage, you gain one momentum die. Just to get things moving at that high level.

I am a little concerned that there's no abilities that work outside rage, and to a lesser degree (based on other barb subclasses) no abilities that work outside combat.

From a flavor perspective, there are only a few features (Bestial Nature, and Fearsome) that make this subclass a better fit for the description then one of the other subclasses. You may want to add in some additional ribbon, or substitute different features that really bring the more-beast-than-man concept home. Some random ideas:

1. Gain advantage on CHR skills vs. beasts. (So when calm can be one with them, and at all times can intimidate and freak them out). Maybe gain Survival skill so they can live as beasts. (Add to Bestial Nature?).
2. Increase Momentum die by 1 size when using Unarmored Defense. (Gained early to give incentive to play to type)
3. Natural weapons while raging? Eh, that would likely not be better than actual weapons, so maybe just put them at the same level of good pugilists and give them d4 for unarmed damage at all times, and they can use it with Reckless Attack.

Just a few ideas off the top of my head, don't take that as exhaustive.

For all that are comparing it to the Battlemaster Fighter, remember that this is gated by Raging. So it is already limited in the number of encounters per day that it can be used.

Blue said:

For all that are comparing it to the Battlemaster Fighter, remember that this is gated by Raging. So it is already limited in the number of encounters per day that it can be used.

Click to expand...

It originally wasn't gated by raging (it also was originally a fighter subclass). The OP has been edited a few times in response to feedback in this thread.

MechaPilot said:

It originally wasn't gated by raging (it also was originally a fighter subclass). The OP has been edited a few times in response to feedback in this thread.

Click to expand...

Thanks for the heads up. I did see some responses that seemed odd for what was currently there, hadn't realized the changes were that big.

Blue said:

Thanks for the heads up. I did see some responses that seemed odd for what was currently there, hadn't realized the changes were that big.

Click to expand...

Also, the debilitating strikes were originally the same as three of the lingering injuries from the DMG: broken arm, broken leg, and broken rib. Throat Punch was a separate ability that got rolled into debilitating strikes.

I was told to tone down the injuries because they were "I win" buttons.

Blue said:

I am going to comment as I read thru, and then pull it together at the end. I specifically did not read anyone else's comments so that I come at it without preconceived notions. If I don't mention something someone else said don't take that as disagreement with them, but rather that they might be more observant than I was.

First point - your subject says Fighter archetype, may want to change that.



Good ribbon, though since you need to either attack or take damage to keep raging, you rarely will have you action available to make checks. Still, sets the scene well.



Renewable resource, but one you don't start any combat with so you can't nova early on. And only available in combats you rage -- nothing during other combats. That balance works for me.

I think there are too many options for quick play. They're cool, I wouldn't suggest trimming. Perhaps pick 3 to start and gain another at two other levels. Oh, and the wording could be read that if you crit you get 3 momentum - one for a successful melee attack, and two for rolling a crit. I'd touch it up slightly to make sure it's what you want. It is also unclear if you gain Momentum if you crit when taking an attack on someone else's turn. Another small benefit of starting with fewer is make it less powerful for cherrypicking with multiclassing.

I like them all, want to talk about two.

Brutality I worried if it wasn't giving you enough, but rereading it to see it's chosen after the hit like a paladin's smite puts it back into perspective.

Fearsome is perhaps the most powerful of them with both a great effect and a good ability of a successful save - but the DC is off CHR which is not usually an oft-raised Barbarian ability. I'll be watching while I read if CHR is a focus.



Cool power, not sure if it's enough for a level. If you do go for a limited selection of Momentum powers, this would be a good level to get another. If not, some out-of-rage/out-of-combat ability that helps reinforce the descriptive theme. (Or both.)



Cool. My only comment is that at 10th, the other barbarian subclasses give abilities that can be used outside rage. This isn't a problem, just a comment. At this point, with 4 rages a day, you are likely raging in the majority of encounters anyway.



I admire your restraint - often when PEACH I see either features that are too powerful by themselves, or are all multipliers of each other. This one, in having to give up the bonus of Extra Attack as well as only usable after the combat has been going (to get 3 Momentum), and a debuff that gives saves every round (a good balance for no Concentration). Throat Punch seems really good, and many others can pare well with group dynamics, but as a 14th level ability I would expect it to have meat to it.

Conclusion
From a balance perspective I think you did a good job, maybe a few places I'd tweak the power level up as mentioned above. Oh, and there isn't the CHR focus elsewhere that would make me concerned about Fearless being too good, so that's still on point.

On thinking back, I think I'd like to add another ability at 14th - when you rage, you gain one momentum die. Just to get things moving at that high level.

I am a little concerned that there's no abilities that work outside rage, and to a lesser degree (based on other barb subclasses) no abilities that work outside combat.

From a flavor perspective, there are only a few features (Bestial Nature, and Fearsome) that make this subclass a better fit for the description then one of the other subclasses. You may want to add in some additional ribbon, or substitute different features that really bring the more-beast-than-man concept home. Some random ideas:

1. Gain advantage on CHR skills vs. beasts. (So when calm can be one with them, and at all times can intimidate and freak them out). Maybe gain Survival skill so they can live as beasts. (Add to Bestial Nature?).
2. Increase Momentum die by 1 size when using Unarmored Defense. (Gained early to give incentive to play to type)
3. Natural weapons while raging? Eh, that would likely not be better than actual weapons, so maybe just put them at the same level of good pugilists and give them d4 for unarmed damage at all times, and they can use it with Reckless Attack.

Just a few ideas off the top of my head, don't take that as exhaustive.

Click to expand...

Those were good suggestions. I've made a few small changes to accommodate them.

I've added more ribbons to the Bestial Nature trait. I've also added the War Paint feature to make members of the subclass more likely to forego traditional armor.

I've also added the Pack Leader and Comprehend Beasts traits to increase the flavor-enhancing ribbons as you progress through the levels.

MechaPilot said:

Those were good suggestions. I've made a few small changes to accommodate them.

I've added more ribbons to the Bestial Nature trait. I've also added the War Paint feature to make members of the subclass more likely to forego traditional armor.

I've also added the Pack Leader and Comprehend Beasts traits to increase the flavor-enhancing ribbons as you progress through the levels.

Click to expand...

I liek the changes to Bestial Nature, including a ribbon disadvantage that makes sense and offsets some of the advantages (skill gains).

I'm not a fan of War Paint. It gives a big increase in power, as opposed to a trade-off of no armor for gaining power elsewhere. The change of this vs. Unarmored Defense is +2+Proficiency vs. +Con. So it starts as if you have an 18 CON (an increase) and by high levels it's the equivalent of 26 CON. It's a definite power boost. And it relies on costly material components from a non-civilized character who conceptually does not have coin and no mechanical way to gather it for themselves because 5e doesn't have a mechanism for that.