Ask an OTTer

[Morrus]

And just like the real world - actually it's much, much easier on the tubez - people can come from one place with one behavioral norm and move to another place with a different set of expectations. And just like the real world, they don't have to instantly behave how you'd like them. It's during that time that it's important to remember where you are and who you're dealing with.

Well, that's a different point. The point I was addressing was the remark that words on the internet shouldn't be able to emotionally affect people.

I'll clarify. Words are words. The communication tool is irrelevant; it doesn't matter whether I speak them to you, or write them down and mail them to you, or telephone you, or write them in a book, or broadcast them on the radio, or trail them in sky-writing. A beautiful poem or piece of literature doesn't lose its power because its posted on the internet; and neither does an insult, a screed, a rant, or a plea.

It's unrealistic to think that because you've created a certain vibe that that vibe will be automatically respected and espoused.

Not at all; it's very realistic to expect that; people *do* normally respect the vibe of where they are online. Take this site as an example (I'll use it because it's what I'm most familiar with). I've been doing this for 14 years now, give or take a few weeks. And by-and-large, people do respect the vibe here. But that's not really what I was talking about.

 

[Kramodlog]

Context in which words are used, and who uses them, are important. A stranger in the subway that tells me I am stupdi will not have the same emotional impact as say my mom telling me so.

Being on the internet, and EW is on the internet, does create a layer of emotional isolation. For example, I do not get upset when someone disagrees with me.

 

[Zombie_Babies]

I cannot answer you that, cause I personally have no problems with that, I just ignore it (without the ignore function even ^^)

How dare you be rational!!!

The bums lost. My advice is to do what your parents did; get a job, sir. The bums will always lose. Do you hear me, Zombie_Babies?

not sure how that fits, but i felt there was a lack of Big Lebowski quotes in here.

Yeah, well, you know, that's just, like, your opinion, man.

 

[Zombie_Babies]

Well, that's a different point. The point I was addressing was the remark that words on the internet shouldn't be able to emotionally affect people.

I'll clarify. Words are words. The communication tool is irrelevant; it doesn't matter whether I speak them to you, or write them down and mail them to you, or telephone you, or write them in a book, or broadcast them on the radio, or trail them in sky-writing. A beautiful poem or piece of literature doesn't lose its power because its posted on the internet; and neither does an insult, a screed, a rant, or a plea.

I see. Goldo already pointed this out, but, again, it's context. My point is that it matter who says what and where they say it. This is the internet and people here, by and large, shouldn't matter enough to cause the same sort of harm as people in person can.

I don't know you professionally so if I were to say you suck at your job would you place as much weight on that as you would if whoever you report to (including yourself) said it? Words are words, yes, but the weight they carry depends upon who said them and where.

Not at all; it's very realistic to expect that; people *do* normally respect the vibe of where they are online. Take this site as an example (I'll use it because it's what I'm most familiar with). I've been doing this for 14 years now, give or take a few weeks. And by-and-large, people do respect the vibe here. But that's not really what I was talking about.

Point of order: I said 'automatically respect and espouse'.

 

[Bullgrit]

It's always those who use words to harrass, annoy, and offend people who then claim to wonder how mere words could possibly bother anyone. It's always trolls who cry offense when called a troll.

You know, a polite, well-meaning person when explained that politeness is expected somewhere, wouldn't spend so much time debating the reasons and boundaries of politeness. But an argumentative person would argue it forever. Half this thread is just argument for the sake of argument.

Bullgrit

 

[Kramodlog]

I m rather surprised and amused to find that some people find that disagreeing with them means that person is impolite and a troll. As if I shouldn't speak my mind because someone has a different opinion.

I do find it paradoxal that someone who complains about politeness and civility call other people trolls. As if politenesss and civility is not for them, just for others. Or maybe calling someone a troll is a form of politeness on EW? This place is different from the rest of the internet, after all.

 

[Kramodlog]

But an argumentative person would argue it forever. Half this thread is just argument for the sake of argument.

I think Morrus is well meaning and just seaking is mind, even if he is wrong.

 

[Morrus]

I don't know you professionally so if I were to say you suck at your job would you place as much weight on that as you would if whoever you report to (including yourself) said it? Words are words, yes, but the weight they carry depends upon who said them and where.

It depends on your words. If you posted an insightful, well-written, accurate analysis of how I did my job and backed it up convincingly, then yes, I'd put weight on it. If you said "Boo yah! You suxxor!" then I wouldn't.

Like I said, the words have power. And putting them on the internet doesn't take away that power.

 

[Morrus]

This place is different from the rest of the internet, after all.

Yes, it is. Every place on the internet is unique.

 

[Kramodlog]

Snowflakes, snowflakes everywhere.