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<blockquote data-quote="Lord Pendragon" data-source="post: 2765184" data-attributes="member: 707"><p>You're right. But I am willing to risk losing a good friend to <em>be</em> a good friend. I think it's safe to say we all care about our friends. In this case, that care would drive me to be the best possible friend I could. And that means braving the danger and doing right by my friend. If I puss out and don't tell my friend the truth, then I'm not his friend at all, and he'll know it if he ever learns what I did.I guess in this sense, I'm the one being a coward. I cannot help but envision a "You tell him, or <em>I will</em>," scene as incredibly messy. It strikes me as easier to simply tell the husband, and be done with it. But I suppose that you're right. If there is a chance that she'll go to her husband, fess up, and work things out, then that is ultimately what's best for him. So perhaps tell her that she really should tell her husband, but leave out the ultimatum. If after a few weeks she hasn't told him, then do so yourself?I'm his friend, not his P.I. If he doesn't believe me (which perhaps he won't,) then he can hire a P.I. himself, though to be honest I don't think that'd be necessary. Once it's brought out into the open it should be rather easy for him to find out on his own. <em>As</em> his friend, my word should carry a certain weight, even if he doesn't want to accept what I'm telling him.If your wife were cheating on you, and a friend of yours found out, are you honestly telling me it wouldn't be his place to tell you?</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Lord Pendragon, post: 2765184, member: 707"] You're right. But I am willing to risk losing a good friend to [i]be[/i] a good friend. I think it's safe to say we all care about our friends. In this case, that care would drive me to be the best possible friend I could. And that means braving the danger and doing right by my friend. If I puss out and don't tell my friend the truth, then I'm not his friend at all, and he'll know it if he ever learns what I did.I guess in this sense, I'm the one being a coward. I cannot help but envision a "You tell him, or [i]I will[/i]," scene as incredibly messy. It strikes me as easier to simply tell the husband, and be done with it. But I suppose that you're right. If there is a chance that she'll go to her husband, fess up, and work things out, then that is ultimately what's best for him. So perhaps tell her that she really should tell her husband, but leave out the ultimatum. If after a few weeks she hasn't told him, then do so yourself?I'm his friend, not his P.I. If he doesn't believe me (which perhaps he won't,) then he can hire a P.I. himself, though to be honest I don't think that'd be necessary. Once it's brought out into the open it should be rather easy for him to find out on his own. [i]As[/i] his friend, my word should carry a certain weight, even if he doesn't want to accept what I'm telling him.If your wife were cheating on you, and a friend of yours found out, are you honestly telling me it wouldn't be his place to tell you? [/QUOTE]
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