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<blockquote data-quote="Pierce" data-source="post: 1487146" data-attributes="member: 12161"><p>"Yo, check it! This is where it all goes down right here, knowhutimsayin? All these are my men - see, there's Woodson - yo Woody! How you doin' my brutha! Boom-boom in da house! Yo, we're all here protectin' an' servin' yo!"</p><p></p><p>The camera followed a tall, handsome, well-dressed black man as he weaved through the maze of desks and cubicles in the large office bullpen. Curious desk clerks prairie-dogged over the top of their grey boxes, squinting to see what the ruckus was about. Captain Osbourne's office door slammed open, sending the blinds flailing.</p><p></p><p>"WHAT IN THE HELL IS GOING ON??!? WHO LET THE PRESS BACK HERE?" Osbourne stormed out of his office and made for the camera.</p><p></p><p>The black man turned and smoothly intercepted Osbourne. Throwing an arm over the Captain's shoulders, he turned to the camera, "See this here's our leader - this is Captain Jack Osbourne, best damn cop-"</p><p></p><p>"GET THAT godd*mn CAMERA OUT OF MY FACE!!" Osbourne grabbed the lens of the camera, swinging it towards the floor. The cameraman nearly fell over trying to keep a grip on the expensive equipment. "JOHNSON!! You better have a godd*mnn good explanation for this sh*t!"</p><p></p><p>"Captain, captain! Chill, yo! This here ain't no <em>press</em> camera - this here's a <em>TV show</em>, yo! Check it: my cousin Frankie works for this guy who knows a guy who plays golf with a guy that dates this chick whose brother is some big-wig with that new FOX network. You know, that new station that got that crazy-ass cartoon kid - 'Kowabunga, dude!' - right? Yo, so anyways this dude's got this crazy-ass idea for a new show. Alls they do is follow around cops while they do their job, yo! And since my cousin Frankie's got a connection, they hooked up with me! Samuel 'Boom-Boom' Johnson! See, it's all good!"</p><p></p><p>"Johnson, I don't give a rat's ass who's camera this is - press is press. If they don't go through the proper channels, they're not allowed back here godd*mnmit! Hey! Is this thing still on? Turn this f**king thing off you son of a b*tch!" Osbroune jerked the camera nearly off the cameraman's shoulder</p><p></p><p>"Hey, that's expensive equipment! Watch out!" The cameraman jerked back, freeing the camera from the captain's grip. He stepped back out of Osbourne's reach and glared. "We've got a contract with Mr. Johnson that states we can follow him anywhere as long as he's on duty and we don't endanger his life."</p><p></p><p>"Yeah? What if <em>your</em> life's in danger?" Osbourne's smile was obviously not friendly.</p><p></p><p>"Uh, well, um...."</p><p></p><p>"That's what I thought. Turn the godd*mn camera off! NOW!!"</p><p></p><p>Boom-Boom stepped inbetween the two, "Now wait a minute, Cap. This could be a real nice thing for the department, see what I'm sayin? The TV guys say they want to show us cops doin' our job and arrestin' the bad guys and sh*t, see? They want to show us in a good light, yo? See, it's all about the image! We show the LAPD bustin' up the drug dealers and yo, it's like Miami Vice, <em>West Coast style</em>!" Boom-Boom flashed a huge grin at the captain, then back over his shoulder to the camera still filming.</p><p></p><p>Osbourne's face stayed beet red, but his smile finally started creeping into his eyes. "You want to be on TV busting drug dealers, eh? Well, follow me. I've got <em>just</em> the case for you. C'mon - you're getting a new partner." He turned and stalked towards A side office with <u>McInnis</u> painted on the glass, Boudreaux and Phat trailing bemusedly behind.</p><p></p><p>"Whoa, wait Cap! I - uh - I've got this great line on the bikini shoplifters down on Venice Beach- Cap? Wait - aw, sh*t." Boom-Boom slumped after the Captain like a kid called to the principal's office, "Well, c'mon Mr. Cameraman. You get to see <em>real</em> police work. Happy?"</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Pierce, post: 1487146, member: 12161"] "Yo, check it! This is where it all goes down right here, knowhutimsayin? All these are my men - see, there's Woodson - yo Woody! How you doin' my brutha! Boom-boom in da house! Yo, we're all here protectin' an' servin' yo!" The camera followed a tall, handsome, well-dressed black man as he weaved through the maze of desks and cubicles in the large office bullpen. Curious desk clerks prairie-dogged over the top of their grey boxes, squinting to see what the ruckus was about. Captain Osbourne's office door slammed open, sending the blinds flailing. "WHAT IN THE HELL IS GOING ON??!? WHO LET THE PRESS BACK HERE?" Osbourne stormed out of his office and made for the camera. The black man turned and smoothly intercepted Osbourne. Throwing an arm over the Captain's shoulders, he turned to the camera, "See this here's our leader - this is Captain Jack Osbourne, best damn cop-" "GET THAT godd*mn CAMERA OUT OF MY FACE!!" Osbourne grabbed the lens of the camera, swinging it towards the floor. The cameraman nearly fell over trying to keep a grip on the expensive equipment. "JOHNSON!! You better have a godd*mnn good explanation for this sh*t!" "Captain, captain! Chill, yo! This here ain't no [I]press[/I] camera - this here's a [I]TV show[/I], yo! Check it: my cousin Frankie works for this guy who knows a guy who plays golf with a guy that dates this chick whose brother is some big-wig with that new FOX network. You know, that new station that got that crazy-ass cartoon kid - 'Kowabunga, dude!' - right? Yo, so anyways this dude's got this crazy-ass idea for a new show. Alls they do is follow around cops while they do their job, yo! And since my cousin Frankie's got a connection, they hooked up with me! Samuel 'Boom-Boom' Johnson! See, it's all good!" "Johnson, I don't give a rat's ass who's camera this is - press is press. If they don't go through the proper channels, they're not allowed back here godd*mnmit! Hey! Is this thing still on? Turn this f**king thing off you son of a b*tch!" Osbroune jerked the camera nearly off the cameraman's shoulder "Hey, that's expensive equipment! Watch out!" The cameraman jerked back, freeing the camera from the captain's grip. He stepped back out of Osbourne's reach and glared. "We've got a contract with Mr. Johnson that states we can follow him anywhere as long as he's on duty and we don't endanger his life." "Yeah? What if [I]your[/I] life's in danger?" Osbourne's smile was obviously not friendly. "Uh, well, um...." "That's what I thought. Turn the godd*mn camera off! NOW!!" Boom-Boom stepped inbetween the two, "Now wait a minute, Cap. This could be a real nice thing for the department, see what I'm sayin? The TV guys say they want to show us cops doin' our job and arrestin' the bad guys and sh*t, see? They want to show us in a good light, yo? See, it's all about the image! We show the LAPD bustin' up the drug dealers and yo, it's like Miami Vice, [I]West Coast style[/I]!" Boom-Boom flashed a huge grin at the captain, then back over his shoulder to the camera still filming. Osbourne's face stayed beet red, but his smile finally started creeping into his eyes. "You want to be on TV busting drug dealers, eh? Well, follow me. I've got [I]just[/I] the case for you. C'mon - you're getting a new partner." He turned and stalked towards A side office with [U]McInnis[/U] painted on the glass, Boudreaux and Phat trailing bemusedly behind. "Whoa, wait Cap! I - uh - I've got this great line on the bikini shoplifters down on Venice Beach- Cap? Wait - aw, sh*t." Boom-Boom slumped after the Captain like a kid called to the principal's office, "Well, c'mon Mr. Cameraman. You get to see [i]real[/i] police work. Happy?" [/QUOTE]
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