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Adventures of Darryl the stone sword
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<blockquote data-quote="jasper" data-source="post: 1891" data-attributes="member: 277"><p>Yo-yo! Dudes. Where was I? Oh? </p><p>The Floppy eared dude had the glassed eye look. </p><p>Floppy in a quivering voice asked where was the dragon. I told it was under a mile. The dude wanted exact directions. Bummer out of the crypt under a minute and already being hassled. I do my thing and tell him below him. Dudes. He started picking up his feet like he was on top of it.</p><p>The adventures chill out and discuss what to do. They decide to check out the door across this huge chamber. Man you could fit the Hollywood bowl in it. They call themselves sneaking across the chamber. The halfling chick and bard start making eyes at each other and they wander off. Meanwhile the elf babe is doing her thing. After a couple of minutes elf babe says it's free of traps. Dude, they could have asked me. So the elf babe starts doing her rogue thing on the steps. The babe is acting like the man is behind every wall and going to bust her.</p><p></p><p>She finally gets to the top of stairs. Hey some art dudes had been doing a heavy trip. Those dudes were right on. They had carved three statues and arranged them in a trio. It was cool. Who has ever heard of ten-foot dwarves? The elf babe starts cat foot and turning her head left and right and scoping out the floor. I thought she drop a contact or something. But a half hour later she dusts …</p><p>Wish a I could score some good dust…</p><p>Where was I?</p><p>Oh, thanks, the elf babe has finished her paranoid fit. And opened the secret door behind one of the dwarves. I could not figure why she didn't open the other doors. But elf babe was acting like the man had pulled her over and her stash was in the open. The adventures trot up the back stairs. Right smack in to the old balding grey beards farts. No these old dudes again. I get ready to consider how a crypt feels again. Bummer. These grey beards little brown jugs, big band lovers, and start their jive talk. Floppy and the rest just stare! More Jive talk, and the adventures were not getting it. I dig the lingo and start explaining to Floppy. </p><p></p><p>Now age before beauty is the normal. But this old fart is so old it takes a while before I notice it's a dudette. Well miss crone is reading the dudes and dudettes the riot act. You know the scene young punks with no respect, blah blah etc etc. And it they don't clear out she calling the man. Then Dudes get this. She decides against call the man and shows off her big mumbo jumbo. Wham! Her guard is gone! Gone faster than a tote at a Grape fruit dead concert. Then the party starts. The elf babe shoots a cross bow bolt in the old dudette, Amber, um Ember, the Amazon chick rushes into the hall to fight a flaming bowling ball of death, and five twins brothers, And then they all chase a rat around. Then this huge old fart about NBA size comes crashing out of his pad to join the party. Finally the dust settles and the human chick is down and out. Floppy is bruise and the elf babe is slapping padlocks up everywhere. They all take a chill pill. </p><p></p><p>Floppy and Elf Babe starts hassling over "oops" and having roasted a cleric. So they decide to Dee Dee out to Burns foot the nearby town. Yo! Man I should a bought a clue that Amber was the first to crash. She crashes a lot. Not enough fiber in her diet and she eats red meat. That diet will kill you man. Well, Floppy and his buds, chill out for a week or two before going back into the stronghold Lilly hammer, Golden hammer, um Glitter hammer, yea that name of the place. </p><p></p><p>The party sneaks in past a couple of half-breeds, and gets back to the old farts. Now while they were gone someone had to call room service because man the bodies were gone. They ignore me when I tell the dragon is nearby. No. The elf babe is tripping. She is trying to be one with each door in the room. It was freaky me out. Finally she decides to open one.</p><p></p><p>She unlocks and runs to the back of party. Amber the human chick opens the door. The room has this cool fountain in it. And this dude, he was styling. He was all draped out in this black sheet, and chanting to his elf. Dig it he had this tune going for him. It was radical. Not some the easy listen big band rift your mommies groove to. The bard freaks out. It like he being out classes so he starts hammering out a rift on his electric sax. It was not cool. The bard was just stepping all over the chanter hymn. And Floppy is yell be gone fowl demon. Man bunch of upright straight lace…</p><p>Dude you got any brownies.</p><p>Well, chanter muse leaves post hastes due to bad vibes the adventures are giving off. He splits the scene. Floppy and his crew give chase but the dude gone. The elf babe tries to become one with doors. Have you heard Morrison's newest single dude?</p><p></p><p>Any way, their bad vibes upset the chanter and the party begins. The chanter was laid low. So the group started trashing each of the rooms. They must thought they were in the band. The only high point to this was when the elf babe and halfling babe got carpet burns….</p><p></p><p>Dude can you imagine how embarrassing it is for carpet to start beating you up and down. I must have laughed out loud. Because just about this time elf babe started some attitude against me. Well Floppy just unwraps her from the carpet and we start checking the last of hall. </p><p>The halfling babe unlocks one door and lets the squeaky clean pimply paladin open the door. You remember him the same guy who want to leave me. </p><p></p><p>He opens the door and there was a good babe. She had short shorts and a great body. And her shirt was just a little to short and she was showing some skin. I was cool with it but the pimply paladin started tripping. He started yell "EVIL EVIL. CREATURE OF EVIL". And dude wonders how come he has not been kissed.</p><p></p><p>Speaking of Kiss I heard cat man…</p><p></p><p>Tickleberry speaks</p><p>Leave it to a stoned sword to get it ALL wrong I wasn't there when he was found, and I didn't get carpet burn, and only once did a dragon scare me, but that's another story stay tuned .</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="jasper, post: 1891, member: 277"] Yo-yo! Dudes. Where was I? Oh? The Floppy eared dude had the glassed eye look. Floppy in a quivering voice asked where was the dragon. I told it was under a mile. The dude wanted exact directions. Bummer out of the crypt under a minute and already being hassled. I do my thing and tell him below him. Dudes. He started picking up his feet like he was on top of it. The adventures chill out and discuss what to do. They decide to check out the door across this huge chamber. Man you could fit the Hollywood bowl in it. They call themselves sneaking across the chamber. The halfling chick and bard start making eyes at each other and they wander off. Meanwhile the elf babe is doing her thing. After a couple of minutes elf babe says it's free of traps. Dude, they could have asked me. So the elf babe starts doing her rogue thing on the steps. The babe is acting like the man is behind every wall and going to bust her. She finally gets to the top of stairs. Hey some art dudes had been doing a heavy trip. Those dudes were right on. They had carved three statues and arranged them in a trio. It was cool. Who has ever heard of ten-foot dwarves? The elf babe starts cat foot and turning her head left and right and scoping out the floor. I thought she drop a contact or something. But a half hour later she dusts … Wish a I could score some good dust… Where was I? Oh, thanks, the elf babe has finished her paranoid fit. And opened the secret door behind one of the dwarves. I could not figure why she didn't open the other doors. But elf babe was acting like the man had pulled her over and her stash was in the open. The adventures trot up the back stairs. Right smack in to the old balding grey beards farts. No these old dudes again. I get ready to consider how a crypt feels again. Bummer. These grey beards little brown jugs, big band lovers, and start their jive talk. Floppy and the rest just stare! More Jive talk, and the adventures were not getting it. I dig the lingo and start explaining to Floppy. Now age before beauty is the normal. But this old fart is so old it takes a while before I notice it's a dudette. Well miss crone is reading the dudes and dudettes the riot act. You know the scene young punks with no respect, blah blah etc etc. And it they don't clear out she calling the man. Then Dudes get this. She decides against call the man and shows off her big mumbo jumbo. Wham! Her guard is gone! Gone faster than a tote at a Grape fruit dead concert. Then the party starts. The elf babe shoots a cross bow bolt in the old dudette, Amber, um Ember, the Amazon chick rushes into the hall to fight a flaming bowling ball of death, and five twins brothers, And then they all chase a rat around. Then this huge old fart about NBA size comes crashing out of his pad to join the party. Finally the dust settles and the human chick is down and out. Floppy is bruise and the elf babe is slapping padlocks up everywhere. They all take a chill pill. Floppy and Elf Babe starts hassling over "oops" and having roasted a cleric. So they decide to Dee Dee out to Burns foot the nearby town. Yo! Man I should a bought a clue that Amber was the first to crash. She crashes a lot. Not enough fiber in her diet and she eats red meat. That diet will kill you man. Well, Floppy and his buds, chill out for a week or two before going back into the stronghold Lilly hammer, Golden hammer, um Glitter hammer, yea that name of the place. The party sneaks in past a couple of half-breeds, and gets back to the old farts. Now while they were gone someone had to call room service because man the bodies were gone. They ignore me when I tell the dragon is nearby. No. The elf babe is tripping. She is trying to be one with each door in the room. It was freaky me out. Finally she decides to open one. She unlocks and runs to the back of party. Amber the human chick opens the door. The room has this cool fountain in it. And this dude, he was styling. He was all draped out in this black sheet, and chanting to his elf. Dig it he had this tune going for him. It was radical. Not some the easy listen big band rift your mommies groove to. The bard freaks out. It like he being out classes so he starts hammering out a rift on his electric sax. It was not cool. The bard was just stepping all over the chanter hymn. And Floppy is yell be gone fowl demon. Man bunch of upright straight lace… Dude you got any brownies. Well, chanter muse leaves post hastes due to bad vibes the adventures are giving off. He splits the scene. Floppy and his crew give chase but the dude gone. The elf babe tries to become one with doors. Have you heard Morrison's newest single dude? Any way, their bad vibes upset the chanter and the party begins. The chanter was laid low. So the group started trashing each of the rooms. They must thought they were in the band. The only high point to this was when the elf babe and halfling babe got carpet burns…. Dude can you imagine how embarrassing it is for carpet to start beating you up and down. I must have laughed out loud. Because just about this time elf babe started some attitude against me. Well Floppy just unwraps her from the carpet and we start checking the last of hall. The halfling babe unlocks one door and lets the squeaky clean pimply paladin open the door. You remember him the same guy who want to leave me. He opens the door and there was a good babe. She had short shorts and a great body. And her shirt was just a little to short and she was showing some skin. I was cool with it but the pimply paladin started tripping. He started yell "EVIL EVIL. CREATURE OF EVIL". And dude wonders how come he has not been kissed. Speaking of Kiss I heard cat man… Tickleberry speaks Leave it to a stoned sword to get it ALL wrong I wasn't there when he was found, and I didn't get carpet burn, and only once did a dragon scare me, but that's another story stay tuned . [/QUOTE]
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