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Crowns of Ice - A Tale of Blood and Betrayal - Chapter I - The Isle of Heildam
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<blockquote data-quote="Queenie" data-source="post: 7044829" data-attributes="member: 8058"><p>Part One ~ </p><p></p><p>Eben watched her from the camp near the shrine, pacing the dark sands while starring into the cold sea. The Skald had made sure that she received her furs at the very least: it was far too chilly on the island to be in nothing but a small piece of linen.</p><p> </p><p>Thorir had agreed to letting her have a small degree of freedom to keep Astrid complacent: swimming out into those waters was certain death, the nearest land was miles upon miles away, and there was relatively little her magic could do to harm them that would not be warded by Baldur's Blessing upon this holy land. A small part of Eben wondered if Thorir had allowed her this measure of autonomy that they might have a moment to talk. He had said so on the ship, after all, right after punching him.</p><p> </p><p>Eben curled a fist at the thought. Coward, was it? Eben left Astrid for <em>her</em> sake, not for his own paltry life. If he had not been so sure that Alec MacTier would have disowned his daughter, as the Clergyman had said, Eben would have risked anything for her. That was another issue entirely: If Alec had not liked the Son of Maren <em>before</em> ...</p><p> </p><p>Eben gave up procrastinating and headed down to the sands to join her. He had shrugged off the heavier chainmail and gambeson, leaving him in just normal clothing: a tunic of yellow and jacket of leather atop, just enough to stop the wind that swept off of the ocean. He had even parted with axe and sword, approaching Astrid as just a man, not the warrior she had seen before. Beside her strode her faithful animal companion, the wolf seeing Eben first and raising her hackles at the Viking. Ruby, too, Eben had reasoned for the release of: so long as Baldur watched over this place, the wolf could do nothing to harm anyone, and it seemed cruel to keep the animal tied up in the face of such protection.</p><p> </p><p>His hair whipped back in the salty breeze, the tide moving swiftly with the roll of the wind. Though it pulled at her hair, the braids of Princess Astrid MacTier seemed to hold the majority of her mane in regal form still. She was beautiful: Eben had never doubted that, but it struck him so now, to see her as a Woman. It made his chest tighten in sorrow and joy, to know that he had kissed those lips and yet feared he may never do so again.</p><p> </p><p>Though he had no plans to send her on to Grandael, he could not forget what she had said: She <em>had</em> to marry Einar, or so she thought. Something was important about that union, and Eben had every intention on finding out what. But not before he had a chance to reconnect with her, to see if the quick vows they had spoken on a fleeing ship still rang true to when they did so in a nocturnal forest.</p><p> </p><p><span style="color: teal">" I missed you."</span></p><p> </p><p>It was a simple declaration once Ruby had alerted Astrid to his presence, but it was at the forefront of Eben's thoughts: he had missed her dearly, trying so desperately to not think of it.</p><p> </p><p><span style="color: teal">" When, when I left that day, I wanted so to come back and take you with me,"</span> he told her, stepping a few paces closer so that he could see her eyes, her soft, green eyes better.</p><p> </p><p><span style="color: teal">" But I was told that your father would sever your name. And already had I spent time sailing with my brother, Thorir. Being pursued. Knowing what it is like to run. To go hungry. To wonder if the next ship on the horizon is the one that will end your life. That is not the life I wanted for you, <em>min kjærlighet</em>."</span></p><p> </p><p>He hung his head, reaching for her hand as if the very touch of her skin could alleviate the morose memory of that fateful night.</p><p> </p><p><span style="color: teal">" I knew your father had greater things in store for you. I knew he would have pursued us endlessly until the bastard who 'stole' his daughter was dead and you were married to someone else anyway. I thought I could claim my family's name. I thought I could make a proper wife of you, to a proper man."</span></p><p> </p><p>Eben grit his teeth, scowling at the damp sand under his boots.</p><p> </p><p><span style="color: teal">" But I was wrong. First I was denied my name by Einar, and then he made it that I could not return to Grandael at all. Add that to coming home to you and being told that my very love for you would mean the end of your life?"</span></p><p> </p><p>Eben caught her eyes upon his own, holding them with that long, gentle stare of his that she had witnessed by candle and starlight.</p><p> </p><p><span style="color: teal">" I swore I would not be the reason you suffered. Not matter what it meant for myself. And for that, I <em>beg</em> of you, Astrid, you <em>cannot</em> wed Einar. Whether or not you still believe I love you, whether or not you believe that I would escape with you from here if only you asked me, the <em>only</em> thing that matters is that you do not go to the House of My Father. Einar is a cruel and savage man: whatever he's promised you and your father is only to help <em>him</em>, and nothing more."</span></p><p> </p><p>Eben took both of her hands in his, unwilling to let her go as he once did.</p><p> </p><p><span style="color: teal">" I love you, Astrid. I never stopped. No other has ever entered my heart nor my bed, no other could ever be the muse to my songs. I <em>cannot</em> watch you go into a home which will break you. I <em>will not</em> stand idly by; I've made that mistake once, and never again now that I have you here." </span></p><p> </p><p>Astrid gave the poet a sad smile and squeezed his hands in hers. </p><p></p><p><span style="color: violet">“ Oh Eben, that must have been so lonely, a long, lonely three years traveling everywhere with all these men and a cold, empty bed at night with no one to comfort you.”</span></p><p> </p><p>Not that she didn’t know exactly how that felt herself. But she had been locked away in the longhouse as ever she was, surrounded by the same family and court as ever she was. Eben traveled the world in adventure, he was handsome and charming, the perfect recipe for romance. Yet, she did not doubt him. </p><p> </p><p>She took the unhurried moment between them to stare into those deep blue eyes, it was much pleasanter to do it here rather than under the threat of the Sea King’s wrath. </p><p> </p><p><span style="color: violet">” I cannot tell you the joy I felt upon seeing you on that ship. After the shock wore off,”</span> she gave a small smile, <span style="color: violet">“ I have spent years wondering if you were okay, if you were alive and alright. Hoping you were thriving someplace, hoping and praying you were content with life. I understood if it was too difficult to have those things with me I just …”</span> </p><p></p><p>She broke eye contact and the smile faded from her face as she looked away from him then, her eyes gazing out over the open seas.</p><p></p><p><span style="color: violet">“ I just hoped you had found happiness somehow, even if it was with someone else.”</span></p><p> </p><p>Astrid took in a slow breath before continuing.</p><p></p><p><span style="color: violet">“ I do not suppose it is worth arguing over anymore, but never did I think you not a proper man, and I believe I told you of this many times. I cared not for what my father or anyone else thought on the matter, it was not up to them to pass that judgement on you, or on us.”</span> </p><p></p><p>She ran the back of her soft hand down his cheek. <span style="color: violet">“ I only wish I could have gotten you to see that My --”</span> she stopped her words short.</p><p> </p><p><em>My Love</em>. She almost said it. After three years it still came almost as natural as breathing. But she could <em>not</em> say it, she couldn’t. It wasn’t fair to him or to her. She was getting married, in the eyes of the church, and it was not to him.</p><p> </p><p>She pulled her other hand away from Eben and started walking slowly along the beach so he would have to catch up, giving her a chance to compose herself. The wind still whipped at them, blowing hair and fur, yet she still didn’t feel the cold, not when he was near her. Ruby ran to keep up, circling around her, occasionally running to the water to look for fish, though none could be found with the surf pounding like it was.</p><p> </p><p><span style="color: violet">“ Einar.”</span></p><p></p><p>She stiffened again, it was an uncomfortable subject to speak to Eben about. She tried to keep her eyes forward, though it was hard knowing he was walking next to her and her instincts were to run to him and never let go.</p><p> </p><p><span style="color: violet">“ I … I truly did not know you were related in any way to Einar, you must believe this,”</span> she implored.</p><p> </p><p><span style="color: violet">“ You say Einar is cruel; cannot this be said about most men who must lead these days? Can you truly tell me your leader, this Sea King, who steals women and the clothes right off their bodies, does not do things one hundred times worse when the mood suits him? I saw it in his eyes, he would inflict violence if he felt he must. He will try to kill my father if he does not get his precious silver and gold. And for what? Greed? Vengeance? Is that not cruel?”</span></p><p> </p><p>She stopped walking and faced Eben. </p><p></p><p><span style="color: violet">“ You do not know the things I have seen in the past three years Eben Marenson and you do not know the things I have lived through. I am not the fragile little creature you left behind. I am harder to break than you think. If Einar Volundson wants to break me, he can try, but I will not make it easy for him.”</span></p><p> </p><p>Astrid took in a long deep breath of the salty air, breathing in until it hurt her lungs and her eyes burned from it.</p><p></p><p><span style="color: violet">“ And I will take from him what I need in the process.” </span> </p><p> </p><p>Her green eyes met Eben’s blue in a determined stare.</p><p></p><p><span style="color: violet">“ But I <em>will</em> marry him Eben, this is going to happen. It <em>has</em> to.”</span></p><p> </p><p>Eben regarded the woman before him with a newfound sense of ... was that worry? The sheer iron in her voice as she declared her intent to wed Einar, it was wholly unlike the girl Eben had left behind. She was entirely right: she was <em>not</em> fragile. Not that she ever was, but something ... something had changed her.</p><p></p><p><span style="color: teal">" My brother, Thorir that is, is <em>nothing</em> like Einar,"</span> Eben defended his kin, <span style="color: teal">" Thorir saved my life when Einar sent men to take it from me. He hadn't even the stones to do it himself: Yes, Thorir and ... and I, we have drawn the sword when need be. But when <em>need be</em>. Einar does it simply because he <em>can</em>."</span></p><p></p><p>He had no clue how to impart to Astrid the severity of her situation. And by what right did he even have to alter her course? He had left, but still ... Still she wanted to call him hers, and only hers. It had pained Eben deeply to watch her mouth form the word and yet no sound pass through her lips. She had stopped herself when he had not. She truly did mean to go to Grandael, then, even now. Eben felt the cold of the beach for the first time, shivering slightly.</p><p></p><p><span style="color: teal">" I am sorry your dress was torn like that,"</span> the Poet offered with a sigh, <span style="color: teal">" That I had known it were you, I would have stopped it, brother or no. But the tearing of a dress is <em>nothing</em> compared to what Einar will do. Take from him? He will use you, your father, and all of Viuland to slake his lust for power and then toss you to the wolves, Astrid. I <em>cannot</em> lose you again, especially not ... not to <em>him</em>!"</span></p><p></p><p>That phrase. "Take from him what I need". That was not something Eben ever expected to hear from Astrid, warm Astrid. It felt so ... icy. Was this the blood of the Silver Dragon manifesting in her finally, or something else entirely?</p><p></p><p><span style="color: teal">" ... What happened while I was gone?"</span> he asked cautiously, <span style="color: teal">" The woman I knew never spoke of taking from others as if they were a well ..."</span></p><p> </p><p>Eben was right, of course: the <em>girl</em> he knew would never take from others like that. Astrid hadn’t been that girl in almost three years. Einar had never been anything but kind to her, yet she was not stupid and knew Einar wasn’t fighting this hard for her because she was beautiful. He wanted something more than a pretty girl; any Jarl could have that any time he wanted. Still, Astrid needed him too and she felt it a fair trade to give him whatever he needed to get what she needed in return.</p><p> </p><p>Her red hair blowing around face, she considered the man before her. Astrid was hesitant, so hesitant: she did not want to tell Eben, she did not want to break his heart when nothing could be done to change the path they were already walking. Eben’s gods believed their story was already written. He knew this, he sang songs of this.</p><p> </p><p>Still, he should know his part in it and she knew this in the deepest recesses in her heart. Astrid sighed and steeled herself against the coming storm. She nodded her head and continued walking down the beachfront. It was a beautiful, green oasis, and any other time Astrid would be delighted to go exploring amongst the exotic flowers, colorful bushes, and tall trees that lined the sandy black beaches and interact with the playful and unique animals that call this little piece of heaven home. </p><p> </p><p><span style="color: violet">“ Just this morning, while my father was saying goodbye to me, he spoke to me about love. He told me, <em>‘Love is something you do for another, not something you feel. And the more you do, the more you will feel.’</em> And I’ve been thinking on that all day.”</span></p><p> </p><p>She turned her face towards Eben to consider him as they continued to walk forward. <span style="color: violet">“I’ve always felt so much love for you Eben. So much. But what have I ever really done? Not much when you think it over. But you? Eben, you?”</span></p><p> </p><p>She reached out and squeezed his warm hand in hers.</p><p></p><p><span style="color: violet">“ You thought my life was in peril and rather than have me hurt, you left, you gave up your life, for me. I thought I might die from you leaving so many times since that night, I truly did, but I see it now so clearly that you did it out of love and it was the most unselfish thing you could have ever done for me. I see it and I understand it clearly.”</span></p><p> </p><p>Astrid felt a small blush rising to her cheeks, looking away from the poet even as her fingers intertwined with his own.</p><p></p><p><span style="color: violet">“ Eben, do you recall that night in the forest when we snuck off under the full moon with a blanket, basket full of bread and cheese and some mead? And we went to one of my favorite places, that lush clearing next to the Sacred Pool of Freyja? It was a warm, gorgeous night, the sky was full of bright stars above us and there was a scent in the air like the sweetest honey. We never could figure out where it was coming from.”</span></p><p></p><p>She chuckled a little at the thought and it was almost as if she could smell that honey right then.</p><p> </p><p><span style="color: violet">” And we sat on our blanket and lit some candles and we enjoyed our food and our mead …”</span></p><p> </p><p>Astrid stopped them from walking suddenly. She turned and looked Eben in the face. Her own face grew more serious, though still filled with love, a much more solemn expression was in her eyes.</p><p></p><p><span style="color: violet">“ And then we made some vows to each other. We promised each other, we <em>promised</em> each other that we would love each other forever plus a day. We said that another would never enter our hearts. You said I was as a wife to you, Eben, and I said you were as a husband to me, and though it was neither in my church or yours we would both keep that in our hearts and souls and I have. I have, you have to believe me… ”</span></p><p></p><p>Though she would not let herself cry a few stray tears rolled down Astrid’s cheeks, rosy pink from the wind whipping all around them. She composed herself, though she refused to wipe the tears: the wind would dry it soon enough. She shut her eyes then, the memories overwhelming her.</p><p> </p><p><span style="color: violet">“ After we made those vows, we went into the Sacred Pool – the one that is supposed to be blessed by your Goddess Freya, that gorgeous crystal clear pool that only married people go to when they are newlywed or tare having trouble conceiving ... We went into the Sacred Pool and we made love there that night. Under the starlight, all night we made love. Do you remember? I got in trouble the next day for being out all night, but I did not care, it was worth every second of punishment.”</span></p><p></p><p>Though she knew what came next, Astrid still smiled: though the future had been terrible, at least that moment would always be blissful to her.</p><p> </p><p><span style="color: violet">“ It was the most wonderful night of my life, and it is the memory I think of before I go to sleep and the first thing I think of when I wake. No matter what happens to me, no one can take that away from me.”</span></p><p> </p><p>Astrid took another deep breath in. The happy memories were about to turn. </p><p></p><p><span style="color: violet">“ I have a confession to make. I did let another in my heart.”</span></p><p> </p><p>Eben felt his entire world crumble in an instant and stop itself from collapsing entirely by a single thread. He made to release Astrid’s hand, though her grip tightened and her green eyes begged him to hear her. The poet released a breath he was not aware he had been holding: what right did he have to be angry? He had left, after all. Resolved in his sorrow, Eben nodded slowly and stayed with his love as she went on.</p><p> </p><p><span style="color: violet">“ The day you left me, I could not wait for you to arrive home. I was so happy, so excited to see you. I was always happy to see you return but this time was … special. I had some news to share. I rushed out to meet you and you would not let me speak … I …”</span> </p><p></p><p>Astrid hung her head. </p><p></p><p><span style="color: violet">“ I think you can recall well what happened between us."</span></p><p></p><p>She sniffled, rubbing her nose gently: the salt was getting to her. Whether from the sea or her eyes, she couldn’t say. </p><p></p><p><span style="color: violet">“ All was not what it seemed, Eben. Please do not blame yourself, for you could not have known any of this would happen, as none of the rest of us knew either. That man who told you to leave … He was not a Clergyman. He was something … it will take some explaining. Something evil. He was not a priest of my church. His first goal was to make you leave, as you were very much in the way to his real goal."</span></p><p> </p><p>The Skald listened intently, confused, unsteady. Someone had forced him away? That priest was not a priest, and somehow Eben, the <em>bastard</em> Eben, was a threat to … whatever it was that he wanted with Astrid? He swore inwardly: the entire goal of his leaving her had all been a ruse? By ‘Something Evil’, as she put it? The poet felt his entire body tense.</p><p></p><p><span style="color: teal">” What was he after, then ..?”</span></p><p> </p><p><span style="color: violet">“ The real goal was me. And … ”</span> </p><p> </p><p>She had put it off as long as she could. She looked away from him for a long moment, her face pained. Finally, she looked back at him sympathetically. She placed a warm palm flat on his cheek and held it there. </p><p> </p><p><span style="color: violet">“ I was so eager to see you that day you returned because of the news … it had been nine long weeks since I had seen you Eben, nine weeks since we made love under the starlight in the Sacred Pool of Freyja.”</span></p><p> </p><p>Breathe in, breathe out.</p><p> </p><p><span style="color: violet">“ Nine weeks had I been carrying your child inside me. Nine weeks I and I alone carried that secret waiting for you to return.”</span></p><p> </p><p>Eben immediately made to interject but Astrid shook her head resolutely and placed a finger over his lips. She had to get this out in one go: she didn’t have the energy to try and restart this all over again, hard as it may have been for him to bare so suddenly. </p><p></p><p><span style="color: violet">“ For nine weeks I dreamed of the life we might have together. I dreamed you were so happy to hear the news you finally stopped that crazy crusade of yours to change your family name, finally stopped leaving me behind. You finally married me like I always wanted and we moved into your mother’s little cottage. As your child grew, you would rub my belly affectionately and sing songs to your love underneath, even when I was sleeping you would sing. You would play games to try to get the baby to kick you, and it would! And you cared for us and loved us like you always cared for me and loved me Eben. It was wonderful, it was joyful, it was blissful. For nine weeks I dreamed and for nine weeks I was so in love with our life … And then nine weeks came and you came and you left without me ever getting to tell you.”</span> </p><p> </p><p>Astrid paused, keeping her hand on Eben’s cheek, hoping to offer some kind of solace to him after learning this devastating news. She had spent the last hours considering what it would be like to learn this, after all this time, but it was inconceivable to her the depths of that pain. </p><p> </p><p>Eben’s hand slipped from her own, the sailor sinking down onto the cool sand and resting his arms on his propped up thighs. He smiled, and then buried his face in his hands, suppressing a shudder. A laugh? A sob? He was a father. A father who had abandoned his child, had abandoned the mother of that child. He recalled her joy that day, recalled how he had destroyed any trace of brightness from her eyes on those docks. Now that he knew the reason behind that light, he thought himself all the worse for having extinguished it. He looked up at her, seeking an answer: what to feel, what to do? She allowed him this confusion, but knew that this was not the end of the story.</p><p> </p><p><span style="color: violet">“ There… there is more. So much more.”</span></p><p></p><p>Eben’s brows raised. More? How could there be <em>more</em>? Astrid knelt in front of him, placing her palms reassuringly on his bent knees. This.</p><p></p><p>This would be the difficult part, she knew.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Queenie, post: 7044829, member: 8058"] Part One ~ Eben watched her from the camp near the shrine, pacing the dark sands while starring into the cold sea. The Skald had made sure that she received her furs at the very least: it was far too chilly on the island to be in nothing but a small piece of linen. Thorir had agreed to letting her have a small degree of freedom to keep Astrid complacent: swimming out into those waters was certain death, the nearest land was miles upon miles away, and there was relatively little her magic could do to harm them that would not be warded by Baldur's Blessing upon this holy land. A small part of Eben wondered if Thorir had allowed her this measure of autonomy that they might have a moment to talk. He had said so on the ship, after all, right after punching him. Eben curled a fist at the thought. Coward, was it? Eben left Astrid for [I]her[/I] sake, not for his own paltry life. If he had not been so sure that Alec MacTier would have disowned his daughter, as the Clergyman had said, Eben would have risked anything for her. That was another issue entirely: If Alec had not liked the Son of Maren [I]before[/I] ... Eben gave up procrastinating and headed down to the sands to join her. He had shrugged off the heavier chainmail and gambeson, leaving him in just normal clothing: a tunic of yellow and jacket of leather atop, just enough to stop the wind that swept off of the ocean. He had even parted with axe and sword, approaching Astrid as just a man, not the warrior she had seen before. Beside her strode her faithful animal companion, the wolf seeing Eben first and raising her hackles at the Viking. Ruby, too, Eben had reasoned for the release of: so long as Baldur watched over this place, the wolf could do nothing to harm anyone, and it seemed cruel to keep the animal tied up in the face of such protection. His hair whipped back in the salty breeze, the tide moving swiftly with the roll of the wind. Though it pulled at her hair, the braids of Princess Astrid MacTier seemed to hold the majority of her mane in regal form still. She was beautiful: Eben had never doubted that, but it struck him so now, to see her as a Woman. It made his chest tighten in sorrow and joy, to know that he had kissed those lips and yet feared he may never do so again. Though he had no plans to send her on to Grandael, he could not forget what she had said: She [I]had[/I] to marry Einar, or so she thought. Something was important about that union, and Eben had every intention on finding out what. But not before he had a chance to reconnect with her, to see if the quick vows they had spoken on a fleeing ship still rang true to when they did so in a nocturnal forest. [color=teal]" I missed you."[/color] It was a simple declaration once Ruby had alerted Astrid to his presence, but it was at the forefront of Eben's thoughts: he had missed her dearly, trying so desperately to not think of it. [color=teal]" When, when I left that day, I wanted so to come back and take you with me,"[/color] he told her, stepping a few paces closer so that he could see her eyes, her soft, green eyes better. [color=teal]" But I was told that your father would sever your name. And already had I spent time sailing with my brother, Thorir. Being pursued. Knowing what it is like to run. To go hungry. To wonder if the next ship on the horizon is the one that will end your life. That is not the life I wanted for you, [I]min kjærlighet[/I]."[/color] He hung his head, reaching for her hand as if the very touch of her skin could alleviate the morose memory of that fateful night. [color=teal]" I knew your father had greater things in store for you. I knew he would have pursued us endlessly until the bastard who 'stole' his daughter was dead and you were married to someone else anyway. I thought I could claim my family's name. I thought I could make a proper wife of you, to a proper man."[/color] Eben grit his teeth, scowling at the damp sand under his boots. [color=teal]" But I was wrong. First I was denied my name by Einar, and then he made it that I could not return to Grandael at all. Add that to coming home to you and being told that my very love for you would mean the end of your life?"[/color] Eben caught her eyes upon his own, holding them with that long, gentle stare of his that she had witnessed by candle and starlight. [color=teal]" I swore I would not be the reason you suffered. Not matter what it meant for myself. And for that, I [I]beg[/I] of you, Astrid, you [I]cannot[/I] wed Einar. Whether or not you still believe I love you, whether or not you believe that I would escape with you from here if only you asked me, the [I]only[/I] thing that matters is that you do not go to the House of My Father. Einar is a cruel and savage man: whatever he's promised you and your father is only to help [I]him[/I], and nothing more."[/color] Eben took both of her hands in his, unwilling to let her go as he once did. [color=teal]" I love you, Astrid. I never stopped. No other has ever entered my heart nor my bed, no other could ever be the muse to my songs. I [I]cannot[/I] watch you go into a home which will break you. I [I]will not[/I] stand idly by; I've made that mistake once, and never again now that I have you here." [/color] Astrid gave the poet a sad smile and squeezed his hands in hers. [color=violet]“ Oh Eben, that must have been so lonely, a long, lonely three years traveling everywhere with all these men and a cold, empty bed at night with no one to comfort you.”[/color] Not that she didn’t know exactly how that felt herself. But she had been locked away in the longhouse as ever she was, surrounded by the same family and court as ever she was. Eben traveled the world in adventure, he was handsome and charming, the perfect recipe for romance. Yet, she did not doubt him. She took the unhurried moment between them to stare into those deep blue eyes, it was much pleasanter to do it here rather than under the threat of the Sea King’s wrath. [color=violet]” I cannot tell you the joy I felt upon seeing you on that ship. After the shock wore off,”[/color] she gave a small smile, [color=violet]“ I have spent years wondering if you were okay, if you were alive and alright. Hoping you were thriving someplace, hoping and praying you were content with life. I understood if it was too difficult to have those things with me I just …”[/color] She broke eye contact and the smile faded from her face as she looked away from him then, her eyes gazing out over the open seas. [COLOR=violet]“ I just hoped you had found happiness somehow, even if it was with someone else.”[/COLOR] Astrid took in a slow breath before continuing. [COLOR=violet]“ I do not suppose it is worth arguing over anymore, but never did I think you not a proper man, and I believe I told you of this many times. I cared not for what my father or anyone else thought on the matter, it was not up to them to pass that judgement on you, or on us.”[/COLOR] She ran the back of her soft hand down his cheek. [COLOR=violet]“ I only wish I could have gotten you to see that My --”[/COLOR] she stopped her words short. [i]My Love[/i]. She almost said it. After three years it still came almost as natural as breathing. But she could [i]not[/i] say it, she couldn’t. It wasn’t fair to him or to her. She was getting married, in the eyes of the church, and it was not to him. She pulled her other hand away from Eben and started walking slowly along the beach so he would have to catch up, giving her a chance to compose herself. The wind still whipped at them, blowing hair and fur, yet she still didn’t feel the cold, not when he was near her. Ruby ran to keep up, circling around her, occasionally running to the water to look for fish, though none could be found with the surf pounding like it was. [COLOR=violet]“ Einar.”[/COLOR] She stiffened again, it was an uncomfortable subject to speak to Eben about. She tried to keep her eyes forward, though it was hard knowing he was walking next to her and her instincts were to run to him and never let go. [COLOR=violet]“ I … I truly did not know you were related in any way to Einar, you must believe this,”[/COLOR] she implored. [COLOR=violet]“ You say Einar is cruel; cannot this be said about most men who must lead these days? Can you truly tell me your leader, this Sea King, who steals women and the clothes right off their bodies, does not do things one hundred times worse when the mood suits him? I saw it in his eyes, he would inflict violence if he felt he must. He will try to kill my father if he does not get his precious silver and gold. And for what? Greed? Vengeance? Is that not cruel?”[/COLOR] She stopped walking and faced Eben. [COLOR=violet]“ You do not know the things I have seen in the past three years Eben Marenson and you do not know the things I have lived through. I am not the fragile little creature you left behind. I am harder to break than you think. If Einar Volundson wants to break me, he can try, but I will not make it easy for him.”[/COLOR] Astrid took in a long deep breath of the salty air, breathing in until it hurt her lungs and her eyes burned from it. [COLOR=violet]“ And I will take from him what I need in the process.” [/COLOR] Her green eyes met Eben’s blue in a determined stare. [COLOR=violet]“ But I [i]will[/i] marry him Eben, this is going to happen. It [i]has[/i] to.”[/COLOR] Eben regarded the woman before him with a newfound sense of ... was that worry? The sheer iron in her voice as she declared her intent to wed Einar, it was wholly unlike the girl Eben had left behind. She was entirely right: she was [i]not[/i] fragile. Not that she ever was, but something ... something had changed her. [color=teal]" My brother, Thorir that is, is [i]nothing[/i] like Einar,"[/color] Eben defended his kin, [color=teal]" Thorir saved my life when Einar sent men to take it from me. He hadn't even the stones to do it himself: Yes, Thorir and ... and I, we have drawn the sword when need be. But when [i]need be[/i]. Einar does it simply because he [i]can[/i]."[/color] He had no clue how to impart to Astrid the severity of her situation. And by what right did he even have to alter her course? He had left, but still ... Still she wanted to call him hers, and only hers. It had pained Eben deeply to watch her mouth form the word and yet no sound pass through her lips. She had stopped herself when he had not. She truly did mean to go to Grandael, then, even now. Eben felt the cold of the beach for the first time, shivering slightly. [color=teal]" I am sorry your dress was torn like that,"[/color] the Poet offered with a sigh, [color=teal]" That I had known it were you, I would have stopped it, brother or no. But the tearing of a dress is [i]nothing[/i] compared to what Einar will do. Take from him? He will use you, your father, and all of Viuland to slake his lust for power and then toss you to the wolves, Astrid. I [i]cannot[/i] lose you again, especially not ... not to [i]him[/i]!"[/color] That phrase. "Take from him what I need". That was not something Eben ever expected to hear from Astrid, warm Astrid. It felt so ... icy. Was this the blood of the Silver Dragon manifesting in her finally, or something else entirely? [color=teal]" ... What happened while I was gone?"[/color] he asked cautiously, [color=teal]" The woman I knew never spoke of taking from others as if they were a well ..."[/color] Eben was right, of course: the [i]girl[/i] he knew would never take from others like that. Astrid hadn’t been that girl in almost three years. Einar had never been anything but kind to her, yet she was not stupid and knew Einar wasn’t fighting this hard for her because she was beautiful. He wanted something more than a pretty girl; any Jarl could have that any time he wanted. Still, Astrid needed him too and she felt it a fair trade to give him whatever he needed to get what she needed in return. Her red hair blowing around face, she considered the man before her. Astrid was hesitant, so hesitant: she did not want to tell Eben, she did not want to break his heart when nothing could be done to change the path they were already walking. Eben’s gods believed their story was already written. He knew this, he sang songs of this. Still, he should know his part in it and she knew this in the deepest recesses in her heart. Astrid sighed and steeled herself against the coming storm. She nodded her head and continued walking down the beachfront. It was a beautiful, green oasis, and any other time Astrid would be delighted to go exploring amongst the exotic flowers, colorful bushes, and tall trees that lined the sandy black beaches and interact with the playful and unique animals that call this little piece of heaven home. [COLOR=violet]“ Just this morning, while my father was saying goodbye to me, he spoke to me about love. He told me, [i]‘Love is something you do for another, not something you feel. And the more you do, the more you will feel.’[/i] And I’ve been thinking on that all day.”[/COLOR] She turned her face towards Eben to consider him as they continued to walk forward. [COLOR=violet]“I’ve always felt so much love for you Eben. So much. But what have I ever really done? Not much when you think it over. But you? Eben, you?”[/COLOR] She reached out and squeezed his warm hand in hers. [COLOR=violet]“ You thought my life was in peril and rather than have me hurt, you left, you gave up your life, for me. I thought I might die from you leaving so many times since that night, I truly did, but I see it now so clearly that you did it out of love and it was the most unselfish thing you could have ever done for me. I see it and I understand it clearly.”[/COLOR] Astrid felt a small blush rising to her cheeks, looking away from the poet even as her fingers intertwined with his own. [COLOR=violet]“ Eben, do you recall that night in the forest when we snuck off under the full moon with a blanket, basket full of bread and cheese and some mead? And we went to one of my favorite places, that lush clearing next to the Sacred Pool of Freyja? It was a warm, gorgeous night, the sky was full of bright stars above us and there was a scent in the air like the sweetest honey. We never could figure out where it was coming from.”[/COLOR] She chuckled a little at the thought and it was almost as if she could smell that honey right then. [COLOR=violet]” And we sat on our blanket and lit some candles and we enjoyed our food and our mead …”[/COLOR] Astrid stopped them from walking suddenly. She turned and looked Eben in the face. Her own face grew more serious, though still filled with love, a much more solemn expression was in her eyes. [COLOR=violet]“ And then we made some vows to each other. We promised each other, we [i]promised[/i] each other that we would love each other forever plus a day. We said that another would never enter our hearts. You said I was as a wife to you, Eben, and I said you were as a husband to me, and though it was neither in my church or yours we would both keep that in our hearts and souls and I have. I have, you have to believe me… ”[/COLOR] Though she would not let herself cry a few stray tears rolled down Astrid’s cheeks, rosy pink from the wind whipping all around them. She composed herself, though she refused to wipe the tears: the wind would dry it soon enough. She shut her eyes then, the memories overwhelming her. [COLOR=violet]“ After we made those vows, we went into the Sacred Pool – the one that is supposed to be blessed by your Goddess Freya, that gorgeous crystal clear pool that only married people go to when they are newlywed or tare having trouble conceiving ... We went into the Sacred Pool and we made love there that night. Under the starlight, all night we made love. Do you remember? I got in trouble the next day for being out all night, but I did not care, it was worth every second of punishment.”[/color] Though she knew what came next, Astrid still smiled: though the future had been terrible, at least that moment would always be blissful to her. [color=violet]“ It was the most wonderful night of my life, and it is the memory I think of before I go to sleep and the first thing I think of when I wake. No matter what happens to me, no one can take that away from me.”[/COLOR] Astrid took another deep breath in. The happy memories were about to turn. [COLOR=violet]“ I have a confession to make. I did let another in my heart.”[/COLOR] Eben felt his entire world crumble in an instant and stop itself from collapsing entirely by a single thread. He made to release Astrid’s hand, though her grip tightened and her green eyes begged him to hear her. The poet released a breath he was not aware he had been holding: what right did he have to be angry? He had left, after all. Resolved in his sorrow, Eben nodded slowly and stayed with his love as she went on. [COLOR=violet]“ The day you left me, I could not wait for you to arrive home. I was so happy, so excited to see you. I was always happy to see you return but this time was … special. I had some news to share. I rushed out to meet you and you would not let me speak … I …”[/COLOR] Astrid hung her head. [COLOR=violet]“ I think you can recall well what happened between us."[/color] She sniffled, rubbing her nose gently: the salt was getting to her. Whether from the sea or her eyes, she couldn’t say. [COLOR=violet]“ All was not what it seemed, Eben. Please do not blame yourself, for you could not have known any of this would happen, as none of the rest of us knew either. That man who told you to leave … He was not a Clergyman. He was something … it will take some explaining. Something evil. He was not a priest of my church. His first goal was to make you leave, as you were very much in the way to his real goal."[/COLOR] The Skald listened intently, confused, unsteady. Someone had forced him away? That priest was not a priest, and somehow Eben, the [i]bastard[/i] Eben, was a threat to … whatever it was that he wanted with Astrid? He swore inwardly: the entire goal of his leaving her had all been a ruse? By ‘Something Evil’, as she put it? The poet felt his entire body tense. [color=teal]” What was he after, then ..?”[/color] [COLOR=violet]“ The real goal was me. And … ”[/COLOR] She had put it off as long as she could. She looked away from him for a long moment, her face pained. Finally, she looked back at him sympathetically. She placed a warm palm flat on his cheek and held it there. [COLOR=violet]“ I was so eager to see you that day you returned because of the news … it had been nine long weeks since I had seen you Eben, nine weeks since we made love under the starlight in the Sacred Pool of Freyja.”[/COLOR] Breathe in, breathe out. [COLOR=violet]“ Nine weeks had I been carrying your child inside me. Nine weeks I and I alone carried that secret waiting for you to return.”[/COLOR] Eben immediately made to interject but Astrid shook her head resolutely and placed a finger over his lips. She had to get this out in one go: she didn’t have the energy to try and restart this all over again, hard as it may have been for him to bare so suddenly. [COLOR=violet]“ For nine weeks I dreamed of the life we might have together. I dreamed you were so happy to hear the news you finally stopped that crazy crusade of yours to change your family name, finally stopped leaving me behind. You finally married me like I always wanted and we moved into your mother’s little cottage. As your child grew, you would rub my belly affectionately and sing songs to your love underneath, even when I was sleeping you would sing. You would play games to try to get the baby to kick you, and it would! And you cared for us and loved us like you always cared for me and loved me Eben. It was wonderful, it was joyful, it was blissful. For nine weeks I dreamed and for nine weeks I was so in love with our life … And then nine weeks came and you came and you left without me ever getting to tell you.”[/COLOR] Astrid paused, keeping her hand on Eben’s cheek, hoping to offer some kind of solace to him after learning this devastating news. She had spent the last hours considering what it would be like to learn this, after all this time, but it was inconceivable to her the depths of that pain. Eben’s hand slipped from her own, the sailor sinking down onto the cool sand and resting his arms on his propped up thighs. He smiled, and then buried his face in his hands, suppressing a shudder. A laugh? A sob? He was a father. A father who had abandoned his child, had abandoned the mother of that child. He recalled her joy that day, recalled how he had destroyed any trace of brightness from her eyes on those docks. Now that he knew the reason behind that light, he thought himself all the worse for having extinguished it. He looked up at her, seeking an answer: what to feel, what to do? She allowed him this confusion, but knew that this was not the end of the story. [COLOR=violet]“ There… there is more. So much more.”[/color] Eben’s brows raised. More? How could there be [i]more[/i]? Astrid knelt in front of him, placing her palms reassuringly on his bent knees. This. This would be the difficult part, she knew. [/QUOTE]
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Crowns of Ice - A Tale of Blood and Betrayal - Chapter I - The Isle of Heildam
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