Menu
News
All News
Dungeons & Dragons
Level Up: Advanced 5th Edition
Pathfinder
Starfinder
Warhammer
2d20 System
Year Zero Engine
Industry News
Reviews
Dragon Reflections
Columns
Weekly Digests
Weekly News Digest
Freebies, Sales & Bundles
RPG Print News
RPG Crowdfunding News
Game Content
ENterplanetary DimENsions
Mythological Figures
Opinion
Worlds of Design
Peregrine's Next
RPG Evolution
Other Columns
From the Freelancing Frontline
Monster ENcyclopedia
WotC/TSR Alumni Look Back
4 Hours w/RSD (Ryan Dancey)
The Road to 3E (Jonathan Tweet)
Greenwood's Realms (Ed Greenwood)
Drawmij's TSR (Jim Ward)
Community
Forums & Topics
Forum List
Latest Posts
Forum list
*Dungeons & Dragons
Level Up: Advanced 5th Edition
D&D Older Editions
*TTRPGs General
*Pathfinder & Starfinder
EN Publishing
*Geek Talk & Media
Search forums
Chat/Discord
Resources
Wiki
Pages
Latest activity
Media
New media
New comments
Search media
Downloads
Latest reviews
Search resources
EN Publishing
Store
EN5ider
Adventures in ZEITGEIST
Awfully Cheerful Engine
What's OLD is NEW
Judge Dredd & The Worlds Of 2000AD
War of the Burning Sky
Level Up: Advanced 5E
Events & Releases
Upcoming Events
Private Events
Featured Events
Socials!
Twitch
YouTube
Facebook (EN Publishing)
Facebook (EN World)
Twitter
Instagram
TikTok
Podcast
Features
Top 5 RPGs Compiled Charts 2004-Present
Adventure Game Industry Market Research Summary (RPGs) V1.0
Ryan Dancey: Acquiring TSR
Q&A With Gary Gygax
D&D Rules FAQs
TSR, WotC, & Paizo: A Comparative History
D&D Pronunciation Guide
Million Dollar TTRPG Kickstarters
Tabletop RPG Podcast Hall of Fame
Eric Noah's Unofficial D&D 3rd Edition News
D&D in the Mainstream
D&D & RPG History
About Morrus
Log in
Register
What's new
Search
Search
Search titles only
By:
Forums & Topics
Forum List
Latest Posts
Forum list
*Dungeons & Dragons
Level Up: Advanced 5th Edition
D&D Older Editions
*TTRPGs General
*Pathfinder & Starfinder
EN Publishing
*Geek Talk & Media
Search forums
Chat/Discord
Menu
Log in
Register
Install the app
Install
The
VOIDRUNNER'S CODEX
is coming! Explore new worlds, fight oppressive empires, fend off fearsome aliens, and wield deadly psionics with this comprehensive boxed set expansion for 5E and A5E!
Community
Playing the Game
Story Hour
Don't laugh..... it's here.
JavaScript is disabled. For a better experience, please enable JavaScript in your browser before proceeding.
You are using an out of date browser. It may not display this or other websites correctly.
You should upgrade or use an
alternative browser
.
Reply to thread
Message
<blockquote data-quote="Hairy Minotaur" data-source="post: 1876097" data-attributes="member: 11574"><p><strong>Wear high boots and watch where you step</strong></p><p></p><p>The party races back to Mirwood, as Paquito relates his story of daring, determination, and courage unbounded in killing Taurranous.</p><p></p><p>"I knew it was now or never, with my hands tied behind my back and then again to each of my feet, I leapt off the stone hand. The huge man turned to face me with a snarl and the glint of death in his eye." Paquito begins</p><p></p><p>"B.S." Benat interjects</p><p></p><p>"Shh... Gronar like story so far." Gronar tells Benat, putting his index finger to his mouth. </p><p></p><p>"He thought I would be easy pickings, he didn't even bother to swat me away. I twisted my head down and I gored his eyes out! Taurranous fell to the floor kicking and wailing like kobold child. I rolled up to my feet, and moved in for the kill." Paquito continued</p><p></p><p>"Pokey brave little, er Korg mean big bullman." Korg said as Paquito now stood taller than Gronar.</p><p></p><p>"Taurranous wasn't done yet, he stood back up to face me, still over three feet taller than me and easily that much wider. His magical sight ability kicked in and he could see me even though his eyes slung low from their sockets, each one pierced by my horns of doom. He pointed at me and said 'to the death', it was then I knew he had to die." Paquito relates</p><p></p><p>"Wait, that part right there. That's when you knew he had to die? Not when he was getting ready to sacrifice you, or when he sent that shapeshifter out to have us ambushed?" Benat asks</p><p></p><p>"Shhh!" comes the combined response from the giants</p><p></p><p>"So there I was, still hog tied and without my spells. It was looking bleak, the rest of the minotaurs stopped fighting so as to watch the death battle that was about to begin. Silence draped itself over the room like a shroud, torches flickered and spiders scurried away. With a snort and a scrape, Taurranous charged me. Quickly thinking, I twisted my body at just the right moment, and he gored his own man standing behind me." Paquito said pumping his arm in a goring motion</p><p></p><p>"Dumb bullman. Even Gronar know not to kill own slave." Gronar replied</p><p></p><p>"I called out to the minotrices in the room to stand up and strike down their oppressive leadership, in unison the females rallied around me and they drove their spears through the hearts of the gawking males. I knew I had won the battle of public perception, the maze mage was just gushing compliments about my combat prowess. She cast lightning bolt after lightning bolt into the ceiling, the blue crackles of light confused Taurranous. That's when I charged again, this time from the back and I tore out his liver and left lung in one strike. The huge man laid there bleeding, his life draining away like a fish in air. Paquito had won the day. No?" Paquito finishes and takes a bow to hearty clapping from the giants.</p><p></p><p>"That has got to be the single most inflated over hyped piece of crap I've ever heard in my entire life. That load of B.S. wouldn't even qualify as comedy for a bard, it's so outrageous." Benat fumes</p><p></p><p>"Elfy just mad because she can't tell story as good as Pokey." Gronar responds</p><p></p><p>"My stories are all true! If I wanted to create a giant pile of stinking refuse, I could and it would sound better than that drivel." Benat answers</p><p></p><p>The giants give Paquito high fives and slap him on the back for a job well done.</p><p></p><p>"Oh great, push his ego even higher. That's just what we need. By the way what did you do to Nameroc?" Benat asks</p><p></p><p>"I have instructed the minotrices to take care of him, his hands and feet were crushed so he would only slow me down as I raced back here to save you from the shaman. No?" Paquito gloats</p><p></p><p>"Gronar train Pokey good. Pokey not even need big ass sword to fight." Gronar congratulates the minotaur.</p><p></p><p>"Hey, Paquito. Where did you say the attack was coming from?" Finrod asks</p><p></p><p>Turning to face the elf, Paquito sees the forest ahead ablaze with all colors of light. Huge tree tops could be seen moving within and around the village. The slight breeze carried with it the scent of blood and the soft sound of a thousand screams. Benat tears through the underbrush in a mad dash back to the village. Finrod does his best to keep up as the giants and Paquito bring up the rear. </p><p></p><p>They emerge from the forest just north of the festival hall. Benat sees great trees, with elf battlements attached to them, lumbering through the thickets surrounding the village. All manner of goblinkind poured into the village proper like boiling poisoned water, they flowed into every open area like an infection. Hatred burned in Benat's eyes as she took aim at the roiling black mass and was set to let fly an arrow when.....</p><p></p><p>"You there! Help us!" An elven voice broke through Benat's concentration</p><p></p><p>The rest of the party filled in behind Benat as she made her way to a group of elves and a large pile of what looked like foliage. </p><p></p><p>"The minotaurs broke through the floor of the festival hall, they slaughtered dozens of elves before most of them even realized there was a battle to be fought. We won't be able to hold them much longer." Benat recognizes the speaker as a priest from the temple</p><p></p><p>"Move out of way, Gronar ready to show Pokey how you supposed to kill other Pokeys." Gronar tells the elves</p><p></p><p>The four elves look at each other, then back at the party. Then move aside, the large coalesced pile of flora shuffles off to the right of the door as well, leaving a slimy mud trail in it's wake. Benat recognizes the thing as a shambling mound. Once it takes it's form off of the door, the head of a battle axe thrusts it's way through the wooden portal. Flames dance along the edge of it's blade and the sound of distant thunder echoes off the splintering door. </p><p></p><p>"I smell more elves out here! Bullarn, quit working on that wall, the door is almost smashed." Shouts a minotaur's voice from beyond the door.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Hairy Minotaur, post: 1876097, member: 11574"] [b]Wear high boots and watch where you step[/b] The party races back to Mirwood, as Paquito relates his story of daring, determination, and courage unbounded in killing Taurranous. "I knew it was now or never, with my hands tied behind my back and then again to each of my feet, I leapt off the stone hand. The huge man turned to face me with a snarl and the glint of death in his eye." Paquito begins "B.S." Benat interjects "Shh... Gronar like story so far." Gronar tells Benat, putting his index finger to his mouth. "He thought I would be easy pickings, he didn't even bother to swat me away. I twisted my head down and I gored his eyes out! Taurranous fell to the floor kicking and wailing like kobold child. I rolled up to my feet, and moved in for the kill." Paquito continued "Pokey brave little, er Korg mean big bullman." Korg said as Paquito now stood taller than Gronar. "Taurranous wasn't done yet, he stood back up to face me, still over three feet taller than me and easily that much wider. His magical sight ability kicked in and he could see me even though his eyes slung low from their sockets, each one pierced by my horns of doom. He pointed at me and said 'to the death', it was then I knew he had to die." Paquito relates "Wait, that part right there. That's when you knew he had to die? Not when he was getting ready to sacrifice you, or when he sent that shapeshifter out to have us ambushed?" Benat asks "Shhh!" comes the combined response from the giants "So there I was, still hog tied and without my spells. It was looking bleak, the rest of the minotaurs stopped fighting so as to watch the death battle that was about to begin. Silence draped itself over the room like a shroud, torches flickered and spiders scurried away. With a snort and a scrape, Taurranous charged me. Quickly thinking, I twisted my body at just the right moment, and he gored his own man standing behind me." Paquito said pumping his arm in a goring motion "Dumb bullman. Even Gronar know not to kill own slave." Gronar replied "I called out to the minotrices in the room to stand up and strike down their oppressive leadership, in unison the females rallied around me and they drove their spears through the hearts of the gawking males. I knew I had won the battle of public perception, the maze mage was just gushing compliments about my combat prowess. She cast lightning bolt after lightning bolt into the ceiling, the blue crackles of light confused Taurranous. That's when I charged again, this time from the back and I tore out his liver and left lung in one strike. The huge man laid there bleeding, his life draining away like a fish in air. Paquito had won the day. No?" Paquito finishes and takes a bow to hearty clapping from the giants. "That has got to be the single most inflated over hyped piece of crap I've ever heard in my entire life. That load of B.S. wouldn't even qualify as comedy for a bard, it's so outrageous." Benat fumes "Elfy just mad because she can't tell story as good as Pokey." Gronar responds "My stories are all true! If I wanted to create a giant pile of stinking refuse, I could and it would sound better than that drivel." Benat answers The giants give Paquito high fives and slap him on the back for a job well done. "Oh great, push his ego even higher. That's just what we need. By the way what did you do to Nameroc?" Benat asks "I have instructed the minotrices to take care of him, his hands and feet were crushed so he would only slow me down as I raced back here to save you from the shaman. No?" Paquito gloats "Gronar train Pokey good. Pokey not even need big ass sword to fight." Gronar congratulates the minotaur. "Hey, Paquito. Where did you say the attack was coming from?" Finrod asks Turning to face the elf, Paquito sees the forest ahead ablaze with all colors of light. Huge tree tops could be seen moving within and around the village. The slight breeze carried with it the scent of blood and the soft sound of a thousand screams. Benat tears through the underbrush in a mad dash back to the village. Finrod does his best to keep up as the giants and Paquito bring up the rear. They emerge from the forest just north of the festival hall. Benat sees great trees, with elf battlements attached to them, lumbering through the thickets surrounding the village. All manner of goblinkind poured into the village proper like boiling poisoned water, they flowed into every open area like an infection. Hatred burned in Benat's eyes as she took aim at the roiling black mass and was set to let fly an arrow when..... "You there! Help us!" An elven voice broke through Benat's concentration The rest of the party filled in behind Benat as she made her way to a group of elves and a large pile of what looked like foliage. "The minotaurs broke through the floor of the festival hall, they slaughtered dozens of elves before most of them even realized there was a battle to be fought. We won't be able to hold them much longer." Benat recognizes the speaker as a priest from the temple "Move out of way, Gronar ready to show Pokey how you supposed to kill other Pokeys." Gronar tells the elves The four elves look at each other, then back at the party. Then move aside, the large coalesced pile of flora shuffles off to the right of the door as well, leaving a slimy mud trail in it's wake. Benat recognizes the thing as a shambling mound. Once it takes it's form off of the door, the head of a battle axe thrusts it's way through the wooden portal. Flames dance along the edge of it's blade and the sound of distant thunder echoes off the splintering door. "I smell more elves out here! Bullarn, quit working on that wall, the door is almost smashed." Shouts a minotaur's voice from beyond the door. [/QUOTE]
Insert quotes…
Verification
Post reply
Community
Playing the Game
Story Hour
Don't laugh..... it's here.
Top