Menu
News
All News
Dungeons & Dragons
Level Up: Advanced 5th Edition
Pathfinder
Starfinder
Warhammer
2d20 System
Year Zero Engine
Industry News
Reviews
Dragon Reflections
Columns
Weekly Digests
Weekly News Digest
Freebies, Sales & Bundles
RPG Print News
RPG Crowdfunding News
Game Content
ENterplanetary DimENsions
Mythological Figures
Opinion
Worlds of Design
Peregrine's Next
RPG Evolution
Other Columns
From the Freelancing Frontline
Monster ENcyclopedia
WotC/TSR Alumni Look Back
4 Hours w/RSD (Ryan Dancey)
The Road to 3E (Jonathan Tweet)
Greenwood's Realms (Ed Greenwood)
Drawmij's TSR (Jim Ward)
Community
Forums & Topics
Forum List
Latest Posts
Forum list
*Dungeons & Dragons
Level Up: Advanced 5th Edition
D&D Older Editions
*TTRPGs General
*Pathfinder & Starfinder
EN Publishing
*Geek Talk & Media
Search forums
Chat/Discord
Resources
Wiki
Pages
Latest activity
Media
New media
New comments
Search media
Downloads
Latest reviews
Search resources
EN Publishing
Store
EN5ider
Adventures in ZEITGEIST
Awfully Cheerful Engine
What's OLD is NEW
Judge Dredd & The Worlds Of 2000AD
War of the Burning Sky
Level Up: Advanced 5E
Events & Releases
Upcoming Events
Private Events
Featured Events
Socials!
Twitch
YouTube
Facebook (EN Publishing)
Facebook (EN World)
Twitter
Instagram
TikTok
Podcast
Features
Top 5 RPGs Compiled Charts 2004-Present
Adventure Game Industry Market Research Summary (RPGs) V1.0
Ryan Dancey: Acquiring TSR
Q&A With Gary Gygax
D&D Rules FAQs
TSR, WotC, & Paizo: A Comparative History
D&D Pronunciation Guide
Million Dollar TTRPG Kickstarters
Tabletop RPG Podcast Hall of Fame
Eric Noah's Unofficial D&D 3rd Edition News
D&D in the Mainstream
D&D & RPG History
About Morrus
Log in
Register
What's new
Search
Search
Search titles only
By:
Forums & Topics
Forum List
Latest Posts
Forum list
*Dungeons & Dragons
Level Up: Advanced 5th Edition
D&D Older Editions
*TTRPGs General
*Pathfinder & Starfinder
EN Publishing
*Geek Talk & Media
Search forums
Chat/Discord
Menu
Log in
Register
Install the app
Install
Community
Playing the Game
Story Hour
Don't laugh..... it's here.
JavaScript is disabled. For a better experience, please enable JavaScript in your browser before proceeding.
You are using an out of date browser. It may not display this or other websites correctly.
You should upgrade or use an
alternative browser
.
Reply to thread
Message
<blockquote data-quote="Hairy Minotaur" data-source="post: 2209216" data-attributes="member: 11574"><p><strong>This isn't any better</strong></p><p></p><p>"Giant sword?" Gronar says to the last door.</p><p></p><p>"Magic sword?" Gronar continues, "Magic giant sword? Big sword? Magic big sword?" </p><p></p><p>"Magic spear" Korg yells from the back of the party</p><p></p><p>"Gronar think this door is broke." Gronar announces</p><p></p><p>"I think you're broke." Nameroc says</p><p></p><p>"Hmm, nope Gronar not broke. Door broke." Gronar replies as he beats his fists on the door.</p><p></p><p>"Maybe the answer isn't a sword?" Finrod interjects</p><p></p><p>"Big axe?" Gronar says to the door as his pauses his fists.</p><p></p><p>"Magic axe?" Korg shouts</p><p></p><p>"I think the answer is a book." Nameroc says</p><p></p><p>"Ha! That funny. What elfy going to kill with book?" Gronar answers laughing.</p><p></p><p>"Bookworm?" Nameroc ignores the giant and focuses on the door.</p><p></p><p>"Bookworm? That even worse than book, Elfy is crazy." Gronar replies</p><p></p><p>"Maybe answer is dead Elfy?" Korg shouts, which quickly snuffs out all noise in the corridor.</p><p></p><p>The elves shift nervously as Korg stares intently at the door hoping to see a dead elf. After nothing happens, Korg returns the elves' stares.</p><p></p><p>"Dead Elfy just as good as book with worm in it?" Korg says</p><p></p><p>"What is your obsession with dead things? And why can't you contribute something constructive to getting us out of here!" Nameroc shouts</p><p></p><p>"Korg not know about that, Korg think Elfy not get enough nurture this morning." The hill giant answers</p><p></p><p>"Just shut up! You're not helping!" Nameroc responds</p><p></p><p>"At least Korg trying to get something good from wishing door, Elfy trying to get dumb things from door." Korg retorts</p><p></p><p>"It's not a wishing door! It's a riddle!" Nameroc exasperates</p><p></p><p>"Take it easy Nameroc, you're not going to get anywhere like that." Finrod says</p><p></p><p>"Like what?! At least I'm trying. What are you doing pops?" Nameroc blasts into Finrod</p><p></p><p>"Name calling isn't going to get the door open." Finrod replies</p><p></p><p>"Elfy should be quiet, Gronar once saw elfy's head blowed off when Gronar used to be a little Gronar." The hill giant offers</p><p></p><p>*snicker* Paquito giggled </p><p></p><p>"Weeelllll, I'm so glad the walking BS trough has decided to join in the conversation. I thought it smelled too nice in here." Nameroc tells Paquito</p><p></p><p>"This reminds me of my journey to the Islands of the Turtles. We had been sailing for seven weeks straight when suddenly land crept over the horizon. The crew shouted with glee as they leapt overboard and began swimming to the islands. However halfway there, the couple dozen or so who had jumped, were swallowed by a gigantic sea serpent. The rest of us who stayed on board, sailed the ship to the beach before we left the boat." Paquito laments</p><p></p><p>"Did that have a point?" Nameroc asks</p><p></p><p>"Gronar like Pokey's stories, Elfy needs to be quiet, shh." Gronar commands Nameroc</p><p></p><p>"So what happened to the sea serpent?" Finrod asks, indulging Paquito</p><p></p><p>"Beats me, I have no knowledge of what transpired in the sea after I disembarked from our vessel. No? I just like that story, I use it to remind me when it's best not to do anything at all. No?" Paquito relates</p><p></p><p>"Hey look. Korg sees light." Korg shouts</p><p></p><p>"The torch in your head went out after you were a baby." Nameroc replies</p><p></p><p>"No, look!" Korg shouts pointing at the door.</p><p></p><p>Turning Nameroc sees that the door has disappeared, and in it's place stood a dirt path with hills in the distance, and clouds overhead.</p><p></p><p>"Out of my way!" Nameroc yells as he pushes his way past Gronar and out of the corridor. </p><p></p><p>Nameroc's joy is quickly frozen away as the chilled air wraps itself around the elf like a blanket. The elf turns and through shivering hands, motions for the party to follow him.</p><p></p><p>"Looks cold out there." Finrod offers</p><p></p><p>"Yeah, I'm not going out there. Maybe we should go back up and see if the crack has opened. No?" Paquito asks</p><p></p><p>"Gronar want to watch Elfy get mad again." The hill giant says with a smile</p><p></p><p>"Korg will smite cold and nurture madness." Korg announces</p><p></p><p>"I'll take two tickets to that show. No?" Paquito announces amid quizzical stares from the giants</p><p></p><p>"It's getting weird in here, I'm going." Finrod says and joins his fridged friend.</p><p></p><p>Finrod soon learns he was better off staying out, the air is freezing and the wind is biting. Looking back at the "doorway" Finrod sees that the door opened a gate and that the portal is only two-dimensions with no depth to it. The giants look like painted figures on a canvas that's floating just above the dirt road.</p><p></p><p>"How long we watch elfy's turn blue?" Gronar asks</p><p></p><p>"As long as we want, I've got a spell that'll heat them back up." Paquito tells Gronar</p><p></p><p>"Pokey need to save spell for flashy display of greatness when Pokey aim is bad." Korg says</p><p></p><p>Annoyed, Paquito steps past the giants and onto the cold path. </p><p></p><p>"Aaayyeee, you could've have warned me." Paquito says through chattering teeth.</p><p></p><p>Not wishing to wait for the hill giants, the elves and Paquito realize that they're no where near where they were when they entered the dome. They decide that south would be the best bet as hopefully it would warm up a little. </p><p></p><p>Walking away from the portal, the group hears the lumbering footsteps of the giants behind them as they race to catch up.</p><p></p><p>"Wait! Gronar knows way to go. Gronar take elfys to cave." Gronar announces as he reaches the group</p><p></p><p>"Uh no, I'm not staying in another cave with you, the last time we got sealed within it remember?" Nameroc replies</p><p></p><p>"Gronar remember elfy whining in the dark, but that what elfys do, so it all the same to Gronar." The hill giant answers</p><p></p><p>Tired from arguing, Nameroc shuts his mouth and trudges on. After a mile the sky darkens a bit, and sleet begins to fall from the clouds. Deciding they need some kind of shelter now, the party begins to jog down the road. A half mile up, they spot a huge but crude lean-to up the road.</p><p></p><p>"There! Head for that." Paquito shouts, as the frozen precipitation picks up in intensity on the party.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Hairy Minotaur, post: 2209216, member: 11574"] [b]This isn't any better[/b] "Giant sword?" Gronar says to the last door. "Magic sword?" Gronar continues, "Magic giant sword? Big sword? Magic big sword?" "Magic spear" Korg yells from the back of the party "Gronar think this door is broke." Gronar announces "I think you're broke." Nameroc says "Hmm, nope Gronar not broke. Door broke." Gronar replies as he beats his fists on the door. "Maybe the answer isn't a sword?" Finrod interjects "Big axe?" Gronar says to the door as his pauses his fists. "Magic axe?" Korg shouts "I think the answer is a book." Nameroc says "Ha! That funny. What elfy going to kill with book?" Gronar answers laughing. "Bookworm?" Nameroc ignores the giant and focuses on the door. "Bookworm? That even worse than book, Elfy is crazy." Gronar replies "Maybe answer is dead Elfy?" Korg shouts, which quickly snuffs out all noise in the corridor. The elves shift nervously as Korg stares intently at the door hoping to see a dead elf. After nothing happens, Korg returns the elves' stares. "Dead Elfy just as good as book with worm in it?" Korg says "What is your obsession with dead things? And why can't you contribute something constructive to getting us out of here!" Nameroc shouts "Korg not know about that, Korg think Elfy not get enough nurture this morning." The hill giant answers "Just shut up! You're not helping!" Nameroc responds "At least Korg trying to get something good from wishing door, Elfy trying to get dumb things from door." Korg retorts "It's not a wishing door! It's a riddle!" Nameroc exasperates "Take it easy Nameroc, you're not going to get anywhere like that." Finrod says "Like what?! At least I'm trying. What are you doing pops?" Nameroc blasts into Finrod "Name calling isn't going to get the door open." Finrod replies "Elfy should be quiet, Gronar once saw elfy's head blowed off when Gronar used to be a little Gronar." The hill giant offers *snicker* Paquito giggled "Weeelllll, I'm so glad the walking BS trough has decided to join in the conversation. I thought it smelled too nice in here." Nameroc tells Paquito "This reminds me of my journey to the Islands of the Turtles. We had been sailing for seven weeks straight when suddenly land crept over the horizon. The crew shouted with glee as they leapt overboard and began swimming to the islands. However halfway there, the couple dozen or so who had jumped, were swallowed by a gigantic sea serpent. The rest of us who stayed on board, sailed the ship to the beach before we left the boat." Paquito laments "Did that have a point?" Nameroc asks "Gronar like Pokey's stories, Elfy needs to be quiet, shh." Gronar commands Nameroc "So what happened to the sea serpent?" Finrod asks, indulging Paquito "Beats me, I have no knowledge of what transpired in the sea after I disembarked from our vessel. No? I just like that story, I use it to remind me when it's best not to do anything at all. No?" Paquito relates "Hey look. Korg sees light." Korg shouts "The torch in your head went out after you were a baby." Nameroc replies "No, look!" Korg shouts pointing at the door. Turning Nameroc sees that the door has disappeared, and in it's place stood a dirt path with hills in the distance, and clouds overhead. "Out of my way!" Nameroc yells as he pushes his way past Gronar and out of the corridor. Nameroc's joy is quickly frozen away as the chilled air wraps itself around the elf like a blanket. The elf turns and through shivering hands, motions for the party to follow him. "Looks cold out there." Finrod offers "Yeah, I'm not going out there. Maybe we should go back up and see if the crack has opened. No?" Paquito asks "Gronar want to watch Elfy get mad again." The hill giant says with a smile "Korg will smite cold and nurture madness." Korg announces "I'll take two tickets to that show. No?" Paquito announces amid quizzical stares from the giants "It's getting weird in here, I'm going." Finrod says and joins his fridged friend. Finrod soon learns he was better off staying out, the air is freezing and the wind is biting. Looking back at the "doorway" Finrod sees that the door opened a gate and that the portal is only two-dimensions with no depth to it. The giants look like painted figures on a canvas that's floating just above the dirt road. "How long we watch elfy's turn blue?" Gronar asks "As long as we want, I've got a spell that'll heat them back up." Paquito tells Gronar "Pokey need to save spell for flashy display of greatness when Pokey aim is bad." Korg says Annoyed, Paquito steps past the giants and onto the cold path. "Aaayyeee, you could've have warned me." Paquito says through chattering teeth. Not wishing to wait for the hill giants, the elves and Paquito realize that they're no where near where they were when they entered the dome. They decide that south would be the best bet as hopefully it would warm up a little. Walking away from the portal, the group hears the lumbering footsteps of the giants behind them as they race to catch up. "Wait! Gronar knows way to go. Gronar take elfys to cave." Gronar announces as he reaches the group "Uh no, I'm not staying in another cave with you, the last time we got sealed within it remember?" Nameroc replies "Gronar remember elfy whining in the dark, but that what elfys do, so it all the same to Gronar." The hill giant answers Tired from arguing, Nameroc shuts his mouth and trudges on. After a mile the sky darkens a bit, and sleet begins to fall from the clouds. Deciding they need some kind of shelter now, the party begins to jog down the road. A half mile up, they spot a huge but crude lean-to up the road. "There! Head for that." Paquito shouts, as the frozen precipitation picks up in intensity on the party. [/QUOTE]
Insert quotes…
Verification
Post reply
Community
Playing the Game
Story Hour
Don't laugh..... it's here.
Top