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<blockquote data-quote="Cleon" data-source="post: 9217702" data-attributes="member: 57383"><p>I think I'd rephrase the references to Firepower as that's mixing game mechanics into the fluff.</p><p></p><p>Some of the described flame colours are a little redundant.</p><p></p><p>The word "gargantuan" has a game mechanics meaning in 5E so I'd swap it for a similar adjective.</p><p></p><p>Would shift the bit about dwarves imprisoning them to a subsection and maybe make it a legend about a specific archomental.</p><p></p><p>Speaking of which, I don't care for the bit about generic archomentals being nameless. Would rather they have names but most are unknown outside the elemental planes.</p><p></p><p>Let's see…</p><p></p><p style="margin-left: 20px">Archomentals are primordial elemental beings of great size and power. Some, such as the Elemental Princes of Evil, are named and worshipped on the Prime Material, but the majority are unknown outside the elemental planes. A fire archomental typically resembles a titanic humanoid or multi-limbed beast composed of a mesmerizing blend of raging flames, billowing smoke, and swirling embers. Wherever it moves, it sets its surroundings ablaze, turning the world to ash, smoke, and cinders. The fire archomental can change the color and shape of its flaming form at will, constantly shifting and flickering with an otherworldly intensity. Typically orange-red with greyish smoke and blazing yellow highlights, should the archomental become excited or infuriated its flames wax and brighten, becoming searing golden-yellow then blindingly white as its firepower intensifies. Regardless of the fiery body's hue or intensity, its eyes are always smoldering black pits that resemble coals.</p> <p style="margin-left: 20px"></p> <p style="margin-left: 20px"> <em><strong>Legends of Incinerated Dwarven Delves?.</strong></em> ???.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Cleon, post: 9217702, member: 57383"] I think I'd rephrase the references to Firepower as that's mixing game mechanics into the fluff. Some of the described flame colours are a little redundant. The word "gargantuan" has a game mechanics meaning in 5E so I'd swap it for a similar adjective. Would shift the bit about dwarves imprisoning them to a subsection and maybe make it a legend about a specific archomental. Speaking of which, I don't care for the bit about generic archomentals being nameless. Would rather they have names but most are unknown outside the elemental planes. Let's see… [indent]Archomentals are primordial elemental beings of great size and power. Some, such as the Elemental Princes of Evil, are named and worshipped on the Prime Material, but the majority are unknown outside the elemental planes. A fire archomental typically resembles a titanic humanoid or multi-limbed beast composed of a mesmerizing blend of raging flames, billowing smoke, and swirling embers. Wherever it moves, it sets its surroundings ablaze, turning the world to ash, smoke, and cinders. The fire archomental can change the color and shape of its flaming form at will, constantly shifting and flickering with an otherworldly intensity. Typically orange-red with greyish smoke and blazing yellow highlights, should the archomental become excited or infuriated its flames wax and brighten, becoming searing golden-yellow then blindingly white as its firepower intensifies. Regardless of the fiery body's hue or intensity, its eyes are always smoldering black pits that resemble coals. [I][B]Legends of Incinerated Dwarven Delves?.[/B][/I] ???.[/indent] [/QUOTE]
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