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[IRON DM] Spring 2004 Contest Thread FINAL JUDGMENT POSTED, CHAMPION ANNOUNCED!
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<blockquote data-quote="Zappo" data-source="post: 1494495" data-attributes="member: 633"><p><em>Zappo's commentary on round 1</em></p><p> </p><p> You're a harsh judge, Wulf. I <em>like</em> this. <img src="data:image/gif;base64,R0lGODlhAQABAIAAAAAAAP///yH5BAEAAAAALAAAAAABAAEAAAIBRAA7" class="smilie smilie--sprite smilie--sprite1" alt=":)" title="Smile :)" loading="lazy" data-shortname=":)" /></p><p> </p><p> I knew that railroading was going to be the main weakness. While SM has given a "situation", I have given a "story". That's a design choice which has pluses and minuses, one of which is that you must provide for the possibility that the PCs screw up, or choose to do something else, or find a Clever Solution (TM).</p><p> </p><p> The problem was that, as you said, there's a lot going on. Far too much. When I realized this it was way too late to redo the entry. The word count was above 4000, and I still had to add all the little "if..then"s that allow a story to work as an adventure. In the end, frantical cutting led to the current version, still above 3000 words and completely impossible to reduce further. The plot grew too complex, and to fit it in a manageable size I was forced to nail it rigidly and eliminate some details.</p><p> </p><p> (btw, the rain was mostly to encourage the PCs to get back to the village after checking the hideout - the effect on the track DC is a mere +1).</p><p> </p><p> OTOH, I was fairly confident on the ingredients. The icon was largely "something to be stolen", that is true. It wasn't completely interchangeable though; depicting the battle of Airin against the drow, it exemplified the proud nature of the village, added to the tone, and hopefully encouraged the players to learn more about the town's history. Well, ok, it could have been something else. <img src="data:image/gif;base64,R0lGODlhAQABAIAAAAAAAP///yH5BAEAAAAALAAAAAABAAEAAAIBRAA7" class="smilie smilie--sprite smilie--sprite8" alt=":D" title="Big grin :D" loading="lazy" data-shortname=":D" /></p><p> </p><p> The crematorium underground was built after the battle, as a burial site for Airin, back when the crematorium was still in use. Therefore, no drow are involved, and the walls were painted with scenes depicting his life, accomplishments, and favorite activities, and the trap was related to his favorite dance. Not stating this explicitly has been a <em>bad</em> mistake on my part and the cause of your "huh?" moment. Live to learn, I guess.</p><p> </p><p> As for the blunt instrument; my players don't attack clerics of Good deities just because they look strange, though that may have more to do with the fact that I usually play Planescape. <img src="data:image/gif;base64,R0lGODlhAQABAIAAAAAAAP///yH5BAEAAAAALAAAAAABAAEAAAIBRAA7" class="smilie smilie--sprite smilie--sprite7" alt=":p" title="Stick out tongue :p" loading="lazy" data-shortname=":p" /> While there are heaps of reasons to suspect him, the crushed skull is the <em>proof</em> that the priest is lying. One of the weakest ingredients, but not too shabby either IMO.</p><p> </p><p> Odd enough, the ingredient that I most feel I had to shoehorn in was the tunnel vision. I had the good description of the vision, tied in with the dungeon and the music, but I couldn't bloody find a way to have someone have it. In the end, the ghost was introduced exclusively for this reason and as you noted, it didn't work much well, appearing far too suddenly.</p><p> </p><p> SM's entry, as I noted, used a completely different approach to good effect. I'm glad I wasn't in Wulf's place, because I find the two entries very hard to compare for this reason. I especially liked that he even found the time to set the adventure in an exotic setting. Thanks to both of you; I look forward to the next round. <img src="data:image/gif;base64,R0lGODlhAQABAIAAAAAAAP///yH5BAEAAAAALAAAAAABAAEAAAIBRAA7" class="smilie smilie--sprite smilie--sprite1" alt=":)" title="Smile :)" loading="lazy" data-shortname=":)" /></p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Zappo, post: 1494495, member: 633"] [i]Zappo's commentary on round 1[/i] You're a harsh judge, Wulf. I [i]like[/i] this. :) I knew that railroading was going to be the main weakness. While SM has given a "situation", I have given a "story". That's a design choice which has pluses and minuses, one of which is that you must provide for the possibility that the PCs screw up, or choose to do something else, or find a Clever Solution (TM). The problem was that, as you said, there's a lot going on. Far too much. When I realized this it was way too late to redo the entry. The word count was above 4000, and I still had to add all the little "if..then"s that allow a story to work as an adventure. In the end, frantical cutting led to the current version, still above 3000 words and completely impossible to reduce further. The plot grew too complex, and to fit it in a manageable size I was forced to nail it rigidly and eliminate some details. (btw, the rain was mostly to encourage the PCs to get back to the village after checking the hideout - the effect on the track DC is a mere +1). OTOH, I was fairly confident on the ingredients. The icon was largely "something to be stolen", that is true. It wasn't completely interchangeable though; depicting the battle of Airin against the drow, it exemplified the proud nature of the village, added to the tone, and hopefully encouraged the players to learn more about the town's history. Well, ok, it could have been something else. :D The crematorium underground was built after the battle, as a burial site for Airin, back when the crematorium was still in use. Therefore, no drow are involved, and the walls were painted with scenes depicting his life, accomplishments, and favorite activities, and the trap was related to his favorite dance. Not stating this explicitly has been a [i]bad[/i] mistake on my part and the cause of your "huh?" moment. Live to learn, I guess. As for the blunt instrument; my players don't attack clerics of Good deities just because they look strange, though that may have more to do with the fact that I usually play Planescape. :p While there are heaps of reasons to suspect him, the crushed skull is the [i]proof[/i] that the priest is lying. One of the weakest ingredients, but not too shabby either IMO. Odd enough, the ingredient that I most feel I had to shoehorn in was the tunnel vision. I had the good description of the vision, tied in with the dungeon and the music, but I couldn't bloody find a way to have someone have it. In the end, the ghost was introduced exclusively for this reason and as you noted, it didn't work much well, appearing far too suddenly. SM's entry, as I noted, used a completely different approach to good effect. I'm glad I wasn't in Wulf's place, because I find the two entries very hard to compare for this reason. I especially liked that he even found the time to set the adventure in an exotic setting. Thanks to both of you; I look forward to the next round. :) [/QUOTE]
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[IRON DM] Spring 2004 Contest Thread FINAL JUDGMENT POSTED, CHAMPION ANNOUNCED!
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