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JollyDoc's Age of Worms (Updated 11/30, Epilogue!)
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<blockquote data-quote="gfunk" data-source="post: 2813748" data-attributes="member: 1813"><p>TWENTY YEARS OF JOY</p><p></p><p>You are hereby and cordially invited to attend and behold the wonder and beauty of our magnificent ruler on this, the twentieth anniversary of his liberation of our fair city!</p><p></p><p>Your carriage awaits two hours before sundown on the eve of this magnificent event.</p><p> ______________________</p><p>Scheduled Course of Events</p><p></p><p>Gathering in the Vertiginous Terrace</p><p> ______________________</p><p>The Harlequinade Mortificatio…Premiere!</p><p> ______________________</p><p>Handsome Slaughter of Curious Avians</p><p> ______________________</p><p>Lively Sports and Baiting…Win The Golden Egg!</p><p> ______________________</p><p>Bowling the Devious Heads…Win The Silver Skull!</p><p> ______________________</p><p>Five Course Feast</p><p> ______________________</p><p>Song! Dance! Braggery! (as time permits)</p><p></p><p>‘Perfect,’ Hawk said dryly through the Mindlink he shared with the others.</p><p></p><p>The next morning found Faust and Pavel seated at a table in the taproom of the Ogre’s Hideout. Faust wouldn’t exactly be welcomed at the Scarlet Spire without Drasek, and the pretence of the Deluxury didn’t suit him, so he and Grubber had taken up temporary residence in the dorm-like common room of the inn. Pavel has just finished his sixth pint of ale, and was beginning yet another story of his time in the Underdark and raiding Menzoberranzan when a shadow fell across the table. Standing over them was a large hobgoblin clad in a breastplate, with a large shield and a bastard sword strapped across his back. A raven perched on one shoulder. Behind him stood a surprisingly clean, smaller hobgoblin wearing robes. </p><p>“Good morning, gentlemen,” the larger hobgoblin said in a cultured voice. “I am B’kruss, commander of the Knights of Nelanther.”</p><p>“So what?” Pavel growled. “Ya want a medal or somethin’?”</p><p>“Charming,” said B’kruss. “I merely wanted to introduce myself to fellow guests at Prince Embuirhan’s Gala. Word spreads fast, though I must confess, I though that I knew all of the invited guests. Imagine my surprise when I heard there would unexpected arrivals.”</p><p>“World’s full’o surprises,” Pavel sneered. “Best get used to it.”</p><p>“Tell me,” B’kruss continued, ignoring the dwarf, “from where do you hail?”</p><p>“All over,” Pavel snapped.</p><p>“Waterdeep,” said Faust.</p><p>“Ah,” said B’kruss, “a city supposedly renowned for its culture and nobility. Surely the two of you must be from some notable House there?”</p><p>“Not at all,” Faust said. “We are merely guests of more well-connected friends. Guilty by association, if you will.”</p><p>B’kruss frowned. “I see. So you are nothing more than coattail hangers. I thought as much. Your benefactor probably paid for invitations on the black market.”</p><p>“Are ya tryin’ to piss me off, ya overgrown kobold?” Pavel said in a low, dangerous voice. “’Cause if ya are, ye’re doin’ a fine job of it.”</p><p>“How typical,” B’kruss drawled. “Threats of violence. The final recourse of the weak-minded. Among my people we settle our differences in more…refined ways.”</p><p>“Like what?” Pavel barked. “Buggerin’ each other’s mothers?”</p><p>B’kruss’ eyes narrowed dangerously. “I would watch your tongue, dwarf, before you find yourself deprived of it.”</p><p>“I’m shakin’ big boy!” Pavel roared, leaping to his feet. “Now, if it’s a fight yer lookin’ for, just name the time and place!”</p><p>B’kruss visibly regained control of his emotions. “I will meet your challenge, but I will not shed your blood. I hereby invite you to pit your skills against mine in the Mindless Courage of the Dreadful Mauling!”</p><p></p><p>At least a hundred hobgoblins were gathered around the corral behind the inn, elbowing and shoving for position. Faust was barely able to keep his spot perched atop a fence rail. B’kruss and Pavel stood in the middle of the enclosure, both weaponless, but still in their mail. </p><p>“The rules are simple, even for one such as yourself,” B’kruss said to the dwarf, though his voice was pitched so that all could hear. Whichever of us can wrestle and pin Gristlegape in the shortest period of time shall be declared the winner.</p><p>“Gristlegape?” Pavel asked skeptically.</p><p>“V’juss, if you would do the honors!” B’kruss called to his smaller companion. The robed hobgoblin walked inside the stable, and returned a moment later leading a monstrous boar, fully as large as a horse, with bony spines protruding from its coarse hide. </p><p>“I will go first,” B’kruss said, “but fair warning dwarf…if you harm Gristlegape, you forfeit the match.” Pavel shrugged and retreated to the edge of the corral. </p><p></p><p>The boar squealed as V’juss released it, and rushed madly around the ring, churning up dust and dirt in a large cloud. As it passed close to B’kruss, the hobgoblin lunged, locking his arms around the pig’s mid-section. Gristlegape squealed louder, and threw its head back, trying to gore the hobgoblin. B’kruss managed to evade the razor-sharp tusks, and then with a grunt of effort, he threw himself to the ground, bringing the boar with him. Gristlegape bucked and squirmed, kicking its feet and flinging its head in all directions, but still the hobgoblin held on.</p><p>“Time!” V’juss called, and the assembled crowed roared their approval. B’kruss had managed to pin the boar in just under thirty seconds. </p><p></p><p>When B’kruss released Gristlegape, the boar once again began charging around the circle, rushing at many of those hobgoblins nearest the fence. Pavel moved cautiously towards the center of the ring, waiting for just the right moment. Finally, the pig noticed him, lowered its head and charged. The dwarf stepped aside at the last possible moment and seized the boar around the neck as it passed. Pavel dug his heels into the ground for traction, trying to stop Gristlegape’s momentum.</p><p></p><p>Unnoticed among the crowd, Faust’s brow furrowed slightly. In that moment, an invisible, whip-like tendril of pure psychic energy lashed out towards the boar, penetrating its feeble mind. The effect was immediate. All of the rage drained out of Gristlegape, replaced by a feeling of fear and hopelessness that its puny mind could not comprehend. Its psyche collapsed in on itself, and the boar curled itself into a fetal position. Pavel felt the pig go limp, but remembering B’kruss’ warning, he continued to wrestle with it, tossing it this way and that to maintain the appearance that it still struggled.</p><p>“Time!” V’juss shouted again, and Pavel released his hold, the unconscious boar sliding to the ground. B’kruss rushed over immediately and knelt beside his mount. “You killed him!” the hobgoblin shouted.</p><p>“Bah!” Pavel snapped. “He’s just asleep. Patented dwarven wrestlin’ move. He’ll come around in a few minutes. What’s the word baldy?” he shouted at V’juss.</p><p>“Twenty-four seconds,” the hobgoblin said quietly. Stunned silence and gasps of disbelief came from the crowd. </p><p>“I guess that makes me the winner,” Pavel said, standing over B’kruss. The large hobgoblin stood slowly and glared at the dwarf for a moment before turning on his heel and stalking away.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="gfunk, post: 2813748, member: 1813"] TWENTY YEARS OF JOY You are hereby and cordially invited to attend and behold the wonder and beauty of our magnificent ruler on this, the twentieth anniversary of his liberation of our fair city! Your carriage awaits two hours before sundown on the eve of this magnificent event. ______________________ Scheduled Course of Events Gathering in the Vertiginous Terrace ______________________ The Harlequinade Mortificatio…Premiere! ______________________ Handsome Slaughter of Curious Avians ______________________ Lively Sports and Baiting…Win The Golden Egg! ______________________ Bowling the Devious Heads…Win The Silver Skull! ______________________ Five Course Feast ______________________ Song! Dance! Braggery! (as time permits) ‘Perfect,’ Hawk said dryly through the Mindlink he shared with the others. The next morning found Faust and Pavel seated at a table in the taproom of the Ogre’s Hideout. Faust wouldn’t exactly be welcomed at the Scarlet Spire without Drasek, and the pretence of the Deluxury didn’t suit him, so he and Grubber had taken up temporary residence in the dorm-like common room of the inn. Pavel has just finished his sixth pint of ale, and was beginning yet another story of his time in the Underdark and raiding Menzoberranzan when a shadow fell across the table. Standing over them was a large hobgoblin clad in a breastplate, with a large shield and a bastard sword strapped across his back. A raven perched on one shoulder. Behind him stood a surprisingly clean, smaller hobgoblin wearing robes. “Good morning, gentlemen,” the larger hobgoblin said in a cultured voice. “I am B’kruss, commander of the Knights of Nelanther.” “So what?” Pavel growled. “Ya want a medal or somethin’?” “Charming,” said B’kruss. “I merely wanted to introduce myself to fellow guests at Prince Embuirhan’s Gala. Word spreads fast, though I must confess, I though that I knew all of the invited guests. Imagine my surprise when I heard there would unexpected arrivals.” “World’s full’o surprises,” Pavel sneered. “Best get used to it.” “Tell me,” B’kruss continued, ignoring the dwarf, “from where do you hail?” “All over,” Pavel snapped. “Waterdeep,” said Faust. “Ah,” said B’kruss, “a city supposedly renowned for its culture and nobility. Surely the two of you must be from some notable House there?” “Not at all,” Faust said. “We are merely guests of more well-connected friends. Guilty by association, if you will.” B’kruss frowned. “I see. So you are nothing more than coattail hangers. I thought as much. Your benefactor probably paid for invitations on the black market.” “Are ya tryin’ to piss me off, ya overgrown kobold?” Pavel said in a low, dangerous voice. “’Cause if ya are, ye’re doin’ a fine job of it.” “How typical,” B’kruss drawled. “Threats of violence. The final recourse of the weak-minded. Among my people we settle our differences in more…refined ways.” “Like what?” Pavel barked. “Buggerin’ each other’s mothers?” B’kruss’ eyes narrowed dangerously. “I would watch your tongue, dwarf, before you find yourself deprived of it.” “I’m shakin’ big boy!” Pavel roared, leaping to his feet. “Now, if it’s a fight yer lookin’ for, just name the time and place!” B’kruss visibly regained control of his emotions. “I will meet your challenge, but I will not shed your blood. I hereby invite you to pit your skills against mine in the Mindless Courage of the Dreadful Mauling!” At least a hundred hobgoblins were gathered around the corral behind the inn, elbowing and shoving for position. Faust was barely able to keep his spot perched atop a fence rail. B’kruss and Pavel stood in the middle of the enclosure, both weaponless, but still in their mail. “The rules are simple, even for one such as yourself,” B’kruss said to the dwarf, though his voice was pitched so that all could hear. Whichever of us can wrestle and pin Gristlegape in the shortest period of time shall be declared the winner. “Gristlegape?” Pavel asked skeptically. “V’juss, if you would do the honors!” B’kruss called to his smaller companion. The robed hobgoblin walked inside the stable, and returned a moment later leading a monstrous boar, fully as large as a horse, with bony spines protruding from its coarse hide. “I will go first,” B’kruss said, “but fair warning dwarf…if you harm Gristlegape, you forfeit the match.” Pavel shrugged and retreated to the edge of the corral. The boar squealed as V’juss released it, and rushed madly around the ring, churning up dust and dirt in a large cloud. As it passed close to B’kruss, the hobgoblin lunged, locking his arms around the pig’s mid-section. Gristlegape squealed louder, and threw its head back, trying to gore the hobgoblin. B’kruss managed to evade the razor-sharp tusks, and then with a grunt of effort, he threw himself to the ground, bringing the boar with him. Gristlegape bucked and squirmed, kicking its feet and flinging its head in all directions, but still the hobgoblin held on. “Time!” V’juss called, and the assembled crowed roared their approval. B’kruss had managed to pin the boar in just under thirty seconds. When B’kruss released Gristlegape, the boar once again began charging around the circle, rushing at many of those hobgoblins nearest the fence. Pavel moved cautiously towards the center of the ring, waiting for just the right moment. Finally, the pig noticed him, lowered its head and charged. The dwarf stepped aside at the last possible moment and seized the boar around the neck as it passed. Pavel dug his heels into the ground for traction, trying to stop Gristlegape’s momentum. Unnoticed among the crowd, Faust’s brow furrowed slightly. In that moment, an invisible, whip-like tendril of pure psychic energy lashed out towards the boar, penetrating its feeble mind. The effect was immediate. All of the rage drained out of Gristlegape, replaced by a feeling of fear and hopelessness that its puny mind could not comprehend. Its psyche collapsed in on itself, and the boar curled itself into a fetal position. Pavel felt the pig go limp, but remembering B’kruss’ warning, he continued to wrestle with it, tossing it this way and that to maintain the appearance that it still struggled. “Time!” V’juss shouted again, and Pavel released his hold, the unconscious boar sliding to the ground. B’kruss rushed over immediately and knelt beside his mount. “You killed him!” the hobgoblin shouted. “Bah!” Pavel snapped. “He’s just asleep. Patented dwarven wrestlin’ move. He’ll come around in a few minutes. What’s the word baldy?” he shouted at V’juss. “Twenty-four seconds,” the hobgoblin said quietly. Stunned silence and gasps of disbelief came from the crowd. “I guess that makes me the winner,” Pavel said, standing over B’kruss. The large hobgoblin stood slowly and glared at the dwarf for a moment before turning on his heel and stalking away. [/QUOTE]
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