Social Encounter Problems, need help!

[Tim Proctor]

So in my plane jumping Campaign the group has ended up in a town of cultists, ones that worship a giant azure oyster, where the militant sect wears deep purple clothes, they have a prophecy about when there is smoke on the water and fire in the skies if they don't fear the reaper then they will live for eternity while 40,000 men and women die in the fires everyday (hope some of you know where this goes, goes its going off the deep end).

So the cult's enemies are Bear Warrior Druids called "Cura Ursus", and they don't like the emotionless state that the Cultists are supposed to achieve, etc. etc. so they are enemies. Anyways the leaders of the Cult are Brother Noheairt, Sister Shreeky, and a Bugbear named Beastly (We're half way off the deep end).

So the group ends up in a town of cultists and they have to get a Greater Portal Compass, which Brother Nohearit has in the treasure room of the great azure oyster. I got the dungeon down and it is all something that a level 14 wizard can do within 1 year within a couple spells of various levels.

I need help with the social roleplaying of the town (about 600 people). It is a rotating DM game and the social guy is mine (Marshal with a +59 to diplomacy - don't use in combat, but will use to keep out of combat), so I can't do all the social roleplay stuff as the DMNPC. We have a Necromancer, Planar Ranger, Aristocratic Rogue, Exotic Weapon Sundering Master, and a Fervant Evangelist of Pelor.

The campaign has a lot of hidden pop culture references which are worth a couple extra xp if players get them, with a good amount of humor and comedy intermixed. Also there is no segment that is considered offensive with this group , so no need to be mild.

Here is the only social encounter that I have:


On a Listen Check DC 15 the group hears two people exchange words
Man 1: How old were you when you first engaged in sexual activity with a partner?
Thick Accent Man: 14.
Man 1: How?
Thick Accent Man: With horse.
Man 1: [pause] How often were you having intercourse with animals at age 14?
Thick Accent Man: [stunned] It's true. I ****ed a pony. You are genius, how did you know?
Man 1: You just said you had
[pause]
Man 1: sex with horse.
Thick Accent Man: Nooo... Whores, not horse, *whores*.

 

[Sekhmet]

Thankfully, playing an emotionless sect is fairly easy.
First, think of what a cat would do if it didn't have curiosity.
There is no awe, no shame, no joy, no grief, no disgust, no fear or apprehension. Everyone is perfectly fine with everything, and everything is perfectly fine.

In your scenario, the man who had sex with a pony wouldn't be stunned, and he wouldn't be in awe. He'd just answer the question.
"I was not having sex with animals at 14, I said "whores"."

 

[Dandu]

You've been watching Kingsley, haven't you?

 

[Tim Proctor]

You've been watching Kingsley, haven't you?

You've earned 500xp, (at level 12) but I like to have a bunch of social rolls and encounters than can mimic a combat scenario.

The way I see it is that if your goal for the encounter is to get the treasure 12 ogres have then whether you use Diplomacy, Bluff, Polymorph them, Kill them, Invisibility/move silently then it shouldn't matter. Violence isn't the only option. Problem is that I need more things like this to supplement the encounter.

There is lots of killing if they group wants to do that, but I want a bunch of encounters for them.

If people don't get the first couple parts let me know.

 

[Dannyalcatraz]

Fleischmann7
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Reported

 

[the Jester]

I'm just sayin', you may want to listen to the Imaginos album for serious inspiration.

 

[Samloyal23]

Have some type of point system for reputation or honour and allow characters to do damage with Charisma based skills like Innuendo and Intimidate...

 

[Tim Proctor]

Okay, I think I'm gonna try to put a doctor who horror mix to it, any thoughts?