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The Ecology of the Kobold (unpublished AD&D 2E version)
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<blockquote data-quote="Richards" data-source="post: 2249423" data-attributes="member: 508"><p>I stare at amazement - I wasn't expecting to find a kobold that speaks the Common tongue. And I wasn't expecting it to speak in such a sultry, feminine voice, either.</p><p></p><p>"Besides," she says in a husky whisper, "You wouldn't want to hurt me, would you?" She runs a scaled hand lovingly across the side of my face.</p><p></p><p>I just stare at her. What's going on? She's obviously a kobold - maybe a good-looking one at that, who knows? - surely she isn't trying to seduce me, is she? I mean, c'mon, she's a <em>reptile!</em> Sure, she's wearing this slinky red dress, even looks like it may be silk, but the pink rat-tail poking out the back isn't much of a turn-on, if you know what I mean. Neither are the scales.</p><p></p><p>Then she offers me a drink from a wineskin. I accept; who knows how often they're planning on feeding me? Plus, it's been a pretty rough day so far. I drink it down.</p><p></p><p>And then, suddenly, everything makes sense to me. It's funny I didn't fit the pieces together before. I mean, when you stop to think about it, it's obvious: she speaks Common, wears a red silk dress, and is taller than the other kobolds. Why? Because <em>she isn't really a kobold,</em> that's why! I've heard of wizards turning themselves into other creatures through their spells; obviously, this is the case here.<strong>[I</strong><strong>]</strong></p><p></p><p>I tell her what I've figured out, and she confirms it.<strong>[J]</strong> She's been running the place as Queen of the Kobolds. And then, it's as if knowing her secret lets me see past her disguise - suddenly, I can see her for who she really is. And let me tell you, she's a real babe!</p><p></p><p>Hey, bartender, another beer here! Thanks.</p><p></p><p>So where was I? Oh yeah. She's obviously attracted to me; can you blame her? I'm a good-looking guy, and I'm wearing practically nothing, so she can get a good look at my rock-hard abs and my statuesque physique.<strong>[K]</strong> Plus, she's been living among KOBOLDS for who knows how long? She must be starved for someone of her own race.</p><p></p><p>I'm a gentleman, so I won't go into details of our brisk little affair. Let's just say that we were mutually satisfied, and leave it at that.<strong>[L]</strong></p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Richards, post: 2249423, member: 508"] I stare at amazement - I wasn't expecting to find a kobold that speaks the Common tongue. And I wasn't expecting it to speak in such a sultry, feminine voice, either. "Besides," she says in a husky whisper, "You wouldn't want to hurt me, would you?" She runs a scaled hand lovingly across the side of my face. I just stare at her. What's going on? She's obviously a kobold - maybe a good-looking one at that, who knows? - surely she isn't trying to seduce me, is she? I mean, c'mon, she's a [i]reptile![/i] Sure, she's wearing this slinky red dress, even looks like it may be silk, but the pink rat-tail poking out the back isn't much of a turn-on, if you know what I mean. Neither are the scales. Then she offers me a drink from a wineskin. I accept; who knows how often they're planning on feeding me? Plus, it's been a pretty rough day so far. I drink it down. And then, suddenly, everything makes sense to me. It's funny I didn't fit the pieces together before. I mean, when you stop to think about it, it's obvious: she speaks Common, wears a red silk dress, and is taller than the other kobolds. Why? Because [i]she isn't really a kobold,[/i] that's why! I've heard of wizards turning themselves into other creatures through their spells; obviously, this is the case here.[b][I[/b][b]][/b] I tell her what I've figured out, and she confirms it.[b][J][/b] She's been running the place as Queen of the Kobolds. And then, it's as if knowing her secret lets me see past her disguise - suddenly, I can see her for who she really is. And let me tell you, she's a real babe! Hey, bartender, another beer here! Thanks. So where was I? Oh yeah. She's obviously attracted to me; can you blame her? I'm a good-looking guy, and I'm wearing practically nothing, so she can get a good look at my rock-hard abs and my statuesque physique.[b][K][/b] Plus, she's been living among KOBOLDS for who knows how long? She must be starved for someone of her own race. I'm a gentleman, so I won't go into details of our brisk little affair. Let's just say that we were mutually satisfied, and leave it at that.[b][L][/b] [/QUOTE]
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