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The Ecology of the Umpleby (unpublished Monster Hunters "Ecology" article)
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<blockquote data-quote="Richards" data-source="post: 8112832" data-attributes="member: 508"><p><strong>THE ECOLOGY OF THE UMPLEBY</strong></p><p></p><p>Dreelix pounded the gavel three times upon the table in front of him and, once convinced he had everyone's attention, declared “This meeting of the Monster Hunters Association is hereby opened.”</p><p></p><p>“Wait a minute,” interrupted Buntleby, looking around the meeting hall. “We can't start yet – where's Willowquisp?”</p><p></p><p>“'<em>Can't start?</em>'” repeated Dreelix, astonishment in his voice at such an odd notion. “We <em>have</em> started – I already banged my gavel! Here, I'll do it again for you if you like; try to pay attention this time!” And he gave the gavel another three bangs. Despite the sternness of his demeanor, he was secretly pleased at this initial interruption for it gave him another opportunity to bang his gavel. Dreelix lived for the moments when he banged his gavel and he instantly became the most important person in the room, with all eyes upon him, eager to hear what he would say. He'd gladly bang his gavel all day long if he could find a reasonable excuse to do so.</p><p></p><p>“But Willowquisp--” began Buntleby, looking around for his friend.</p><p></p><p>“He won't be here tonight,” interjected Spontayne the Studious from the back of the room. “He's giving a guest lecture at the Sage's Conference.”</p><p></p><p>“Oh, no! Was that tonight? I told him I'd be there for him!”</p><p></p><p>Dreelix banged on the table with his gavel again, a good six times in rapid succession this time. “Order!” he called. “I will have order in this meeting hall! Now then, Willowquisp's current whereabouts are not on tonight's agenda! Instead, Zantoullios is going to demonstrate--”</p><p></p><p>“I'm sorry,” interrupted Buntleby, standing up from his chair and taking care not to wake up Ozzie, his osquip familiar, who had fallen asleep at the bald wizard's feet. “I promised Willowquisp I'd listen to his lecture. I'll, uh, I'll catch up with you later, Spontayne – you can fill me in on what I missed. And you'll look after Ozzie for me? Thanks! Sorry, everyone! Carry on!” And the bald wizard scrambled out the door of the meeting hall, while Dreelix banged his gavel yet again (four times, just to mix things up a bit) and announced he was charging Buntleby ten pieces of gold for disturbing the evening's meeting and delaying the agenda.</p><p></p><p>“Grindle: make a note of that!” he called out, pointing with his beloved gavel at the heavyset wizard sitting at the table to his right. Grindle the Coin-Counter, the Association's Treasurer, frowned but did as requested, jotting the charge in a notebook he pulled from a pocket of his stained robe.</p><p></p><p>Exiting the building, Buntleby focused his mind and then said the words to a <em>teleport</em> spell. Even by teleporting across the city in the space of a mere instant he feared he was going to be late and would very likely miss the beginning of the elderly sage's speech, but he wanted to support his friend and was actually interested in the subject of Willowquisp's lecture: the umpleby, a rare and most unusual creature indeed, if the things he'd heard about them were true.<strong>[1]</strong></p><p><strong></strong></p><p><strong></strong></p><p><strong></strong></p><p><strong>NOTES</strong></p><p><strong>1.</strong> Umplebies are rarely encountered, spending most of their time in temperate forest environs. The few times they are encountered in the wild is usually when their curiosity gets the better of them and they wander about in search of bits of “treasure” - anything from actual coins and gems to sparkly bits of broken glass and shiny scraps of tin.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Richards, post: 8112832, member: 508"] [b]THE ECOLOGY OF THE UMPLEBY[/b] Dreelix pounded the gavel three times upon the table in front of him and, once convinced he had everyone's attention, declared “This meeting of the Monster Hunters Association is hereby opened.” “Wait a minute,” interrupted Buntleby, looking around the meeting hall. “We can't start yet – where's Willowquisp?” “'[i]Can't start?[/i]'” repeated Dreelix, astonishment in his voice at such an odd notion. “We [i]have[/i] started – I already banged my gavel! Here, I'll do it again for you if you like; try to pay attention this time!” And he gave the gavel another three bangs. Despite the sternness of his demeanor, he was secretly pleased at this initial interruption for it gave him another opportunity to bang his gavel. Dreelix lived for the moments when he banged his gavel and he instantly became the most important person in the room, with all eyes upon him, eager to hear what he would say. He'd gladly bang his gavel all day long if he could find a reasonable excuse to do so. “But Willowquisp--” began Buntleby, looking around for his friend. “He won't be here tonight,” interjected Spontayne the Studious from the back of the room. “He's giving a guest lecture at the Sage's Conference.” “Oh, no! Was that tonight? I told him I'd be there for him!” Dreelix banged on the table with his gavel again, a good six times in rapid succession this time. “Order!” he called. “I will have order in this meeting hall! Now then, Willowquisp's current whereabouts are not on tonight's agenda! Instead, Zantoullios is going to demonstrate--” “I'm sorry,” interrupted Buntleby, standing up from his chair and taking care not to wake up Ozzie, his osquip familiar, who had fallen asleep at the bald wizard's feet. “I promised Willowquisp I'd listen to his lecture. I'll, uh, I'll catch up with you later, Spontayne – you can fill me in on what I missed. And you'll look after Ozzie for me? Thanks! Sorry, everyone! Carry on!” And the bald wizard scrambled out the door of the meeting hall, while Dreelix banged his gavel yet again (four times, just to mix things up a bit) and announced he was charging Buntleby ten pieces of gold for disturbing the evening's meeting and delaying the agenda. “Grindle: make a note of that!” he called out, pointing with his beloved gavel at the heavyset wizard sitting at the table to his right. Grindle the Coin-Counter, the Association's Treasurer, frowned but did as requested, jotting the charge in a notebook he pulled from a pocket of his stained robe. Exiting the building, Buntleby focused his mind and then said the words to a [i]teleport[/i] spell. Even by teleporting across the city in the space of a mere instant he feared he was going to be late and would very likely miss the beginning of the elderly sage's speech, but he wanted to support his friend and was actually interested in the subject of Willowquisp's lecture: the umpleby, a rare and most unusual creature indeed, if the things he'd heard about them were true.[b][1] NOTES 1.[/b] Umplebies are rarely encountered, spending most of their time in temperate forest environs. The few times they are encountered in the wild is usually when their curiosity gets the better of them and they wander about in search of bits of “treasure” - anything from actual coins and gems to sparkly bits of broken glass and shiny scraps of tin. [/QUOTE]
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