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<blockquote data-quote="the Jester" data-source="post: 319262" data-attributes="member: 1210"><p><strong>The Orca's Penis-Ring</strong></p><p></p><p><em><span style="color: ltblue">That was the actual title of game #486 in my campaign. I have a battered notebook that I make a sign in sheet for each game on and take a few notes if I'm lucky. Anyway, where were we?</span></em></p><p></p><p>Clambake returns to the ship due to exhaustion and wounds, and also to help keep an eye of the clockwork master. He is not at all sure he trusts this Titus just yet, and it would be unfortunate if the ship departed while they were in the middle of the ocean. The rest of the party travels on. </p><p></p><p>The first cave houses a lone sea troll. As the party enters the undersea lair, he growls something none of them understand, so Sith moves to attack. The troll snaps out a spell and the entire party starts glowing green. Two sharks swim up to attack the heroes. Horbin blasts them with a sound burst while Sith trades blows with the sea troll until it falls. Horbin and Bolfol finish off the sharks and the group searches the troll. They find some sort of algal holy symbol (the underwater equivalent of mistletoe, they deduce) but no whale marital aid, so they move on. Now that he’s seen one, Sith polymorphs himself into a scrag himself.</p><p></p><p>The next cave entrance is shaped like a bug U, dropping down and rising again. At the top, the characters burst into a large grotto filled with a large bubble of foul-smelling air. They start to haul themselves out, but as they do four large hulking forms charge out of the darkness at them- sea trolls! And the party’s caught flat-footed half in the water!</p><p></p><p>Two of the trolls leap into the water with the characters; the other two slam into Horbin and Sith; Bolfol is still underwater, and the abrupt entrance of the two trolls in a bubbling splash is his first hint that anything has gone wrong. Fortunately, the little halfling has been keeping to the shadows, and the excited scrags don’t notice him yet.</p><p></p><p>Sith and Horbin hoist themselves out of the water and act, weathering attacks from the trolls as they do. The holy man calls upon Dexter to save him, and one of the trolls decides to ignore him; after all, he seems weak compared to the sea troll with him. But Sith hastes himself and then attacks for all his worth, using trollish claws and bite. The trolls in the water, denied an opportunity to flank swimming opponents, use their long arms to snatch at their foes in the cave. Bolfol, swimming quietly into a flanking position with Sith, goes to take a stab at one of the trolls but fumbles so badly that he drops his blade and the troll still doesn’t even know it! Cursing silently, he creeps to the bottom of the U-shaped passage to retrieve it, then re-ascends, hoping it hasn’t taken too long or alerted the trolls to his presence. An unmoving troll body plunges into the water past him and sinks to the bottom of the passage.</p><p></p><p>Sith is grappling body to body with a sea troll; they would be evenly matched but for the bull’s strength rippling through the polymorphed wizard. Horbin is searching for any sign of a large ring, but the grotto has many recesses and much filth in it, including bones, troll dung, a few coins and many discarded shells, their former occupants no doubt sucked out by the trolls. Bolfol scrambles out of the water and sticks the troll grappling Sith right in the back of the throat (he can tell them apart by Sith’s equipment) and it gurgles. Sith breaks free from it and with a ferocious swipe of the claws drops it to the ground.</p><p></p><p>The group searches as quickly as circumstances allow, but when one of the trolls, still wounded but regenerating, emerges from the water, the group is interrupted. They drop it and it sinks back down the drain. After that it becomes a frantic game of search-and-strike, with Sith keeping the regenerating scrags from getting into trouble. The ones in the air-filled part of the cave don’t seem to be regenerating, though, and the group takes heart in that. Finally, Horbin prays for guidance and finds what they’re looking for: an enormous ring that looks to be made of a flexible kelp-like substance. Snickering to themselves, the party leaves, making sure they don’t leave any trolls in the water and hoping they’ll stay dead.</p><p></p><p>Fifteen minutes of swimming later the group is near to the steelship and Madriel the killer whale. He thanks them and provides them with a mouthful of pearls in gratitude. The party is about to reboard the ship when he harrumphs and says, “Well, there’s just one more thing...”</p><p></p><p>“What’s that?” asks Horbin.</p><p></p><p>“Well, umm... you see, we orcas, we don’t have hands.” Pause. “Umm, I kind of, well... need help putting it on.”</p><p></p><p>Sith and Bolfol get on board the ship. </p><p></p><p>Horbin, good guy that he is, tries to give Madriel a hand, so to speak, but there’s one problem.</p><p></p><p>“It won’t fit unless I’m, umm...”</p><p></p><p>“I don’t believe I’m doing this,” Horbin says to no one in particular, but he does. “Think of your girlfriend,” he says to the orca. And the cleric helps him, umm, get ready to put, er, his, you know, ring on.</p><p></p><p></p><p></p><p>That’s enough for now!</p><p></p><p>Next time: our heroes’ journey ends, but not how- or where- they wanted! Who ends up MIA?</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="the Jester, post: 319262, member: 1210"] [b]The Orca's Penis-Ring[/b] [i][color=ltblue]That was the actual title of game #486 in my campaign. I have a battered notebook that I make a sign in sheet for each game on and take a few notes if I'm lucky. Anyway, where were we?[/color][/i][color=ltblue][/color] Clambake returns to the ship due to exhaustion and wounds, and also to help keep an eye of the clockwork master. He is not at all sure he trusts this Titus just yet, and it would be unfortunate if the ship departed while they were in the middle of the ocean. The rest of the party travels on. The first cave houses a lone sea troll. As the party enters the undersea lair, he growls something none of them understand, so Sith moves to attack. The troll snaps out a spell and the entire party starts glowing green. Two sharks swim up to attack the heroes. Horbin blasts them with a sound burst while Sith trades blows with the sea troll until it falls. Horbin and Bolfol finish off the sharks and the group searches the troll. They find some sort of algal holy symbol (the underwater equivalent of mistletoe, they deduce) but no whale marital aid, so they move on. Now that he’s seen one, Sith polymorphs himself into a scrag himself. The next cave entrance is shaped like a bug U, dropping down and rising again. At the top, the characters burst into a large grotto filled with a large bubble of foul-smelling air. They start to haul themselves out, but as they do four large hulking forms charge out of the darkness at them- sea trolls! And the party’s caught flat-footed half in the water! Two of the trolls leap into the water with the characters; the other two slam into Horbin and Sith; Bolfol is still underwater, and the abrupt entrance of the two trolls in a bubbling splash is his first hint that anything has gone wrong. Fortunately, the little halfling has been keeping to the shadows, and the excited scrags don’t notice him yet. Sith and Horbin hoist themselves out of the water and act, weathering attacks from the trolls as they do. The holy man calls upon Dexter to save him, and one of the trolls decides to ignore him; after all, he seems weak compared to the sea troll with him. But Sith hastes himself and then attacks for all his worth, using trollish claws and bite. The trolls in the water, denied an opportunity to flank swimming opponents, use their long arms to snatch at their foes in the cave. Bolfol, swimming quietly into a flanking position with Sith, goes to take a stab at one of the trolls but fumbles so badly that he drops his blade and the troll still doesn’t even know it! Cursing silently, he creeps to the bottom of the U-shaped passage to retrieve it, then re-ascends, hoping it hasn’t taken too long or alerted the trolls to his presence. An unmoving troll body plunges into the water past him and sinks to the bottom of the passage. Sith is grappling body to body with a sea troll; they would be evenly matched but for the bull’s strength rippling through the polymorphed wizard. Horbin is searching for any sign of a large ring, but the grotto has many recesses and much filth in it, including bones, troll dung, a few coins and many discarded shells, their former occupants no doubt sucked out by the trolls. Bolfol scrambles out of the water and sticks the troll grappling Sith right in the back of the throat (he can tell them apart by Sith’s equipment) and it gurgles. Sith breaks free from it and with a ferocious swipe of the claws drops it to the ground. The group searches as quickly as circumstances allow, but when one of the trolls, still wounded but regenerating, emerges from the water, the group is interrupted. They drop it and it sinks back down the drain. After that it becomes a frantic game of search-and-strike, with Sith keeping the regenerating scrags from getting into trouble. The ones in the air-filled part of the cave don’t seem to be regenerating, though, and the group takes heart in that. Finally, Horbin prays for guidance and finds what they’re looking for: an enormous ring that looks to be made of a flexible kelp-like substance. Snickering to themselves, the party leaves, making sure they don’t leave any trolls in the water and hoping they’ll stay dead. Fifteen minutes of swimming later the group is near to the steelship and Madriel the killer whale. He thanks them and provides them with a mouthful of pearls in gratitude. The party is about to reboard the ship when he harrumphs and says, “Well, there’s just one more thing...” “What’s that?” asks Horbin. “Well, umm... you see, we orcas, we don’t have hands.” Pause. “Umm, I kind of, well... need help putting it on.” Sith and Bolfol get on board the ship. Horbin, good guy that he is, tries to give Madriel a hand, so to speak, but there’s one problem. “It won’t fit unless I’m, umm...” “I don’t believe I’m doing this,” Horbin says to no one in particular, but he does. “Think of your girlfriend,” he says to the orca. And the cleric helps him, umm, get ready to put, er, his, you know, ring on. That’s enough for now! Next time: our heroes’ journey ends, but not how- or where- they wanted! Who ends up MIA? [/QUOTE]
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