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The Saga of Lucius Victorium Gnaeus (A pogre storyhour) Episode Fifteen
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<blockquote data-quote="pogre" data-source="post: 7114014" data-attributes="member: 6588"><p>The Saga of Lucius Victorium Gnaeus</p><p></p><p><strong>Episode Two</strong></p><p></p><p>Well rested, and completely at the mercy of the trustworthiness of a lowly kobold, our motley band readied ourselves for an assault on the kobold warren. It somehow seemed appropriate that we were engineering a coup that would result in the greatest coward in the whole kobold community being crowned.</p><p></p><p>As the appointed time neared for our assault I suggested a preliminary scouting and suggested that either my feline companion or the elf Elros run reconnaissance.</p><p></p><p>“I do have a name you know,” my feline companion responded to my suggestion.</p><p></p><p>“Oh yes, of course you do. I can reassure you my friend - ‘feline companion’ is a term of endearment,” I said.</p><p></p><p>“You don’t even know my name, do you?” my feline companion’s green eyes glared balefully at me in pure kitty disgust. </p><p></p><p>“You are wrong in your indignity. We have travelled the continent. I saved you, by the grace of Kord, from slavers. We have shared time in bonds.” I was stalling.</p><p></p><p>“And, still, you do not know my name!” the rising quality of my feline companion’s voice was both abrasive and slightly alarming.</p><p></p><p>I searched my mind. Surely I had heard his name at one time. I was befuddled. Finally, it came to me! “Swamp Edge,” I pronounced proudly.</p><p></p><p>“No,” my feline companion snarled. “But, I admit you are closer than I expected - it is Edge.”</p><p></p><p>“Ah, perhaps Edgy or Elros or both can go quickly and furtively explore our target and report back?” I suggested for the second time.</p><p></p><p>“I’ll go,” Edgy replied. “And it is Edge.”</p><p></p><p>“Of course, a term of endearment, I reassure you,” I demurred. The truth was Edgy was a far more descriptive name for my fickle, feline companion. I quietly resolved to continue to use it.</p><p></p><p>I looked to Elros. The elf simply shrugged his shoulders. Perhaps he had surmised that Edgy was expendable. An evaluation I had to admit, I was not entirely at odds with.</p><p></p><p>Edgy slinked off into the darkness towards the warren.</p><p></p><p>*****</p><p></p><p>“He’s taking too long,” Thock complained. Edgy had been gone a number of minutes, and I admit, I was growing concerned too.</p><p></p><p>“Let’s give him two more minutes and then we will go in,” Shen the Half-Elf suggested. Thus agreed, we prepared our blind assault on the warren.</p><p></p><p>As we were just about ready to head in, Edgy came stumbling back towards us. He quickly reported that he had been undetected. Praise Kord! He also reported that he had gutted one of the guards. Naturally, he had not concealed the body and so we could brook no delay. He also reported a human was being held prisoner by the kobolds - aloft in a cage. </p><p></p><p>A quick plan was formulated: Edgy and Elros would quickly move ahead of the group and take up positions flanking the chief’s building’s entrance. The rest of us would follow quickly with as much stealth as we could muster, and when hostilities broke out I would cast Light of Kord. </p><p></p><p>That was the extent of our plan. I made several foolish assumptions as my companions nodded in accord with the scheme. I assumed we would try to lure the enemy out of the shack to face flanking assaults from the rogues. I assumed we would fight defensively and force the enemy to come to us, to avoid being overrun.</p><p></p><p>You know the old saying about what happens when you <strong>assume </strong>something…</p><p>In this case, Thock would be the “you/u” in this age-old truism.</p><p></p><p>*****</p><p></p><p>The rogues quickly moved ahead. I could see very little even with the numerous cooking fires that were spread around the enormous cavern we were entering. I did, however, hear the throaty growl and then ROAR of Thock and the pounding of feet as he charged ahead.</p><p></p><p>“Cast Light! Cast light!” Shen excitedly said. I did so and a radiant light announced our position to the entire cavern of ne'er do wells. I just managed to watch Thock crash into the crude stone building as the flanking rogues looked on in surprise. The din that quickly rose from the building was akin to a night soil cart crashing into a noble wedding. The rogues recovered from their initial shock and ducked into the building too.</p><p></p><p>Shen and I rushed forward to help. Our progress was arrested by a horrifying sight: two kobolds with wings were flying towards us toting heavy rocks. I shudder to think what unhappy mates created these abominable mutations. Let’s just say, I am willing to bet - the bat was the unwilling participant in this unnatural coupling. I called down a <em>Bolt of Kord</em> on one of the flying monstrosities, but even encumbered, the nasty imp dodged the divine lance. Shen followed suit with his <em>Marvelous Missiles of Unerring Flight</em> - one of the flying kobolds was struck down and crashed to the cavern floor.</p><p>The remaining airborne kobold dropped his slate and struck poor Shen directly atop his head! </p><p></p><p>I weighed whether to cast another <em>Bolt of Kord</em> at the creature, heal Shen, or attack the kobold which was coming towards me from the direction of the chief’s building. I resolved to save my companion and rushed over, and with the blessing of Kord, healed the half-elf. Shen winked his thanks and unleashed another set of<em> Marvelous Missiles of Unerring Flight</em> knocking down the other flying abomination. Elros had emerged from the building and struck down the kobold that was coming after me. </p><p></p><p>Shen and I went forth into the building. The scene resembled an outer kitchen on butchering day. Blood and gore made the floor slick. Prostrate on the floor was the half-orc barbarian, Thock. An orc appeared over him readying a killing blow. A pair of female kobolds were whimpering in the shadows. Warrior kobolds, a hobgoblin, and an orc lay lifeless in the muck. The remaining orc tumbled down after being struck by Edgy from behind. Suddenly, the sound level lowered as the melee subsided.</p><p></p><p>I went over to administer healing to Thock, who was still breathing. The rest of the group began gathering weapons. Edgy proceeded out of the building and lowered the cage, which contained a human in plate. I rushed after my feline companion, concerned any social faux paus he might make might lose us a valuable ally. The gentleman was thanking Edgy profusely for his rescue when I arrived.</p><p></p><p>I quickly introduced myself and learned the man’s name was Calodar. He had an accent from the realm that I recognized, but could not quite place. Calodar explained that he had been captured by orcs and transported to the kobold warren. He was also in a hurry to gain his equipment back and marched toward the remaining building in the cavern to retrieve it. Edgy ran ahead of us and entered the shack. I stayed with the man so he could see his way. I asked him where he hailed from and replied that he was from Nurle. I had heard of it, and had a generally positive impression of the place.</p><p></p><p>We exchanged other pleasantries and explained in general terms why we were in this place. He said he was looking for an item and I said we were looking for a way out after being imprisoned. We left the explanations with these polite vagaries.</p><p></p><p>Calodar and I strode into the crude stone building and found Edgy rifling through a pair of packs. Calodar went to the far wall and hefted a mighty greatsword. Calodar placed the enormous sword in a back scabbard and remarked, “There should be a bag of uncut gems in one of those packs.”</p><p></p><p>“I did not find any,” Edgy replied.</p><p></p><p>I highly suspected Edgy was lying, but said nothing. Afterall, Calodar had a generally favorable impression of the feline. No sense in ruining it prematurely. Edgy would invariably do so of his accord in time.</p><p></p><p>*****</p><p></p><p>Calodar was introduced quickly round to the rest of the group and it was agreed we would not wait for the return of our kobold conspirator. The kobold had upheld his first part of the bargain, no sense in waiting to find out if he would remain complicit. A quick discussion yielded that Calodar thought the item he was seeking lay in an orc encampment some travel distance away and the way out was through the encampment too. A joint venture was quickly called for and the stalwart group quickly set off into the dark tunnels.</p><p></p><p>Travelling some distance we came to a chasm bisecting our tunnel. There was a large wicker-style basket with four ropes attached to it lashed to our side of the chasm. </p><p></p><p>“What was this for?” Shen inquired.</p><p></p><p>“Oh, when they brought me this way they had four flying kobolds lift me across in this basket,” Calodar explained.</p><p></p><p>This explanation astonished me on a number of levels. First was the matter-of-fact way Calodar explained his spanning of the gorge. It was like a farmer pointing to a mule to explain how he got to chapel - no big deal. Second, Calodar had completely failed to mention there was an enormous chasm, probably in the neighborhood of one hundred feet deep and twenty-five feet wide in our path. Had he mentioned this back in the kobold warren, we might have scrounged something to help us bridge this gap. I was starting to understand how this gent in plate was captured by orcs....</p><p></p><p>We agreed someone would take a long segment of rope, climb down the chasm, climb up the opposite side, and secure the rope on the opposing side. Edgy volunteered. No one objected. Edgy skillfully traversed the chasm and Elros quickly scooted across the gap as well. Next came the half-orc, barbarian Thock - two-thirds of the way across there was a SNAP and Thock was tumbling down. He whirled his arms and tried to gain purchase on the chasm wall with no success. Shen once again came to the rescue and cast <em>Fortuitously Falling of Featherly Descent</em> and saved Thock. Thock eventually made his way back up climbing the chasm wall after numerous missteps and crashes. Repairs to the rope were made and the rest of the group made it across intact.</p><p></p><p>Edgy had been trying to get the group’s attention as he waved a collection of small white bones around. “Look at these!” he exclaimed. “Very strange, very strange,” he muttered.</p><p></p><p>Others in the group examined the bones carefully and did note that they were unusually clean and bright white. It was as though the bones had been placed in a mild acidic bath. I was alarmed as to what this portended. But, there was nothing for it - our path lay ahead.</p><p></p><p>*****</p><p>As had become our standard, Edgy worked the dark passage ahead of the group. After a short while we heard a muffled whine. We rushed ahead with light and saw Edgy stuck in a quivering mass of translucent jelly appearing very much like a fly in amber. This gurgling, undulating mass was heading towards us with our feline companion enveloped within. </p><p></p><p>Edgy managed somehow to escape behind the square-shaped beast, but the beast kept slithering towards us. I wondered if its alien intelligence somehow knew it had us trapped by the chasm that was to our immediate rear. I called down a Greater Glorious Bolt of Kord down on the creature that not only caused tremendous damage to the beast, but made it much easier to see and attack with the glowing nimbus of light that surrounded it. </p><p></p><p>I fully expected to hear the howl of an angry charge coming from Thock and his weapon digging into the jelly. Instead, Thock retrieved a javelin, that looked much like a river reed in his hand and tossed it at the creature. Thock was willing to charge an entire warren of kobolds, but threw a stick at a disadvantaged enemy! Trying to parse Thock’s system of combat strategy was clearly beyond me. </p><p></p><p>Elros followed up Thock’s meager contribution with a sling bullet. </p><p></p><p>I endeavored not to let this boon of Kord go without taking advantage of it. I hefted the battleaxe I had taken from the dead orcs in the warren and charged the beast. A mighty swing sent amoeba-like matter spraying the sides of the tunnel. My god’s will surged through me and I made another massive swing chunking pieces of the beast about. The beast seemed unstoppable and continued towards me.</p><p></p><p>With tentacle-like pods it reached for me. I jumped backwards. It reached for me again. And this time - I was enveloped. I was encased in this jelly-like substance and could feel an itching, burning sensation on my skin. Nevermind the fact I could not breathe at all. I admit I was feeling panicked. </p><p></p><p>Then the calm of Kord came to me. I prayed fervently and quickly. Kord’s answer came immediately - in an instance the creature died and its jelly-like body fell away from me. I was saved by the grace of Kord! Someone later said a sling bullet from Elros had downed the beast, but those without faith often miss the miracle. </p><p></p><p>A quick survey found several items of interest preserved in the creature. I was given a scroll case containing a prayer of a higher valence than my discipline. I endeavored to use it only in case of emergency.</p><p></p><p>We traveled a bit further and then made camp for the night. As I cleaned the orc hide armor I had taken from the warren the best I could I reflected on the day’s events. Kord’s abundant blessings on me were manifest in so many ways, and yet, my companions did not seem to have taken note. Then I realized, with great humility, I was sent by Kord as a beacon of hope and light for these folks. My example before Kord was the important thing - I was a living testament to my lord. Thus reassured of my divine mission, I sank into a peaceful sleep.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="pogre, post: 7114014, member: 6588"] The Saga of Lucius Victorium Gnaeus [B]Episode Two[/B] Well rested, and completely at the mercy of the trustworthiness of a lowly kobold, our motley band readied ourselves for an assault on the kobold warren. It somehow seemed appropriate that we were engineering a coup that would result in the greatest coward in the whole kobold community being crowned. As the appointed time neared for our assault I suggested a preliminary scouting and suggested that either my feline companion or the elf Elros run reconnaissance. “I do have a name you know,” my feline companion responded to my suggestion. “Oh yes, of course you do. I can reassure you my friend - ‘feline companion’ is a term of endearment,” I said. “You don’t even know my name, do you?” my feline companion’s green eyes glared balefully at me in pure kitty disgust. “You are wrong in your indignity. We have travelled the continent. I saved you, by the grace of Kord, from slavers. We have shared time in bonds.” I was stalling. “And, still, you do not know my name!” the rising quality of my feline companion’s voice was both abrasive and slightly alarming. I searched my mind. Surely I had heard his name at one time. I was befuddled. Finally, it came to me! “Swamp Edge,” I pronounced proudly. “No,” my feline companion snarled. “But, I admit you are closer than I expected - it is Edge.” “Ah, perhaps Edgy or Elros or both can go quickly and furtively explore our target and report back?” I suggested for the second time. “I’ll go,” Edgy replied. “And it is Edge.” “Of course, a term of endearment, I reassure you,” I demurred. The truth was Edgy was a far more descriptive name for my fickle, feline companion. I quietly resolved to continue to use it. I looked to Elros. The elf simply shrugged his shoulders. Perhaps he had surmised that Edgy was expendable. An evaluation I had to admit, I was not entirely at odds with. Edgy slinked off into the darkness towards the warren. ***** “He’s taking too long,” Thock complained. Edgy had been gone a number of minutes, and I admit, I was growing concerned too. “Let’s give him two more minutes and then we will go in,” Shen the Half-Elf suggested. Thus agreed, we prepared our blind assault on the warren. As we were just about ready to head in, Edgy came stumbling back towards us. He quickly reported that he had been undetected. Praise Kord! He also reported that he had gutted one of the guards. Naturally, he had not concealed the body and so we could brook no delay. He also reported a human was being held prisoner by the kobolds - aloft in a cage. A quick plan was formulated: Edgy and Elros would quickly move ahead of the group and take up positions flanking the chief’s building’s entrance. The rest of us would follow quickly with as much stealth as we could muster, and when hostilities broke out I would cast Light of Kord. That was the extent of our plan. I made several foolish assumptions as my companions nodded in accord with the scheme. I assumed we would try to lure the enemy out of the shack to face flanking assaults from the rogues. I assumed we would fight defensively and force the enemy to come to us, to avoid being overrun. You know the old saying about what happens when you [B]assume [/B]something… In this case, Thock would be the “you/u” in this age-old truism. ***** The rogues quickly moved ahead. I could see very little even with the numerous cooking fires that were spread around the enormous cavern we were entering. I did, however, hear the throaty growl and then ROAR of Thock and the pounding of feet as he charged ahead. “Cast Light! Cast light!” Shen excitedly said. I did so and a radiant light announced our position to the entire cavern of ne'er do wells. I just managed to watch Thock crash into the crude stone building as the flanking rogues looked on in surprise. The din that quickly rose from the building was akin to a night soil cart crashing into a noble wedding. The rogues recovered from their initial shock and ducked into the building too. Shen and I rushed forward to help. Our progress was arrested by a horrifying sight: two kobolds with wings were flying towards us toting heavy rocks. I shudder to think what unhappy mates created these abominable mutations. Let’s just say, I am willing to bet - the bat was the unwilling participant in this unnatural coupling. I called down a [I]Bolt of Kord[/I] on one of the flying monstrosities, but even encumbered, the nasty imp dodged the divine lance. Shen followed suit with his [I]Marvelous Missiles of Unerring Flight[/I] - one of the flying kobolds was struck down and crashed to the cavern floor. The remaining airborne kobold dropped his slate and struck poor Shen directly atop his head! I weighed whether to cast another [I]Bolt of Kord[/I] at the creature, heal Shen, or attack the kobold which was coming towards me from the direction of the chief’s building. I resolved to save my companion and rushed over, and with the blessing of Kord, healed the half-elf. Shen winked his thanks and unleashed another set of[I] Marvelous Missiles of Unerring Flight[/I] knocking down the other flying abomination. Elros had emerged from the building and struck down the kobold that was coming after me. Shen and I went forth into the building. The scene resembled an outer kitchen on butchering day. Blood and gore made the floor slick. Prostrate on the floor was the half-orc barbarian, Thock. An orc appeared over him readying a killing blow. A pair of female kobolds were whimpering in the shadows. Warrior kobolds, a hobgoblin, and an orc lay lifeless in the muck. The remaining orc tumbled down after being struck by Edgy from behind. Suddenly, the sound level lowered as the melee subsided. I went over to administer healing to Thock, who was still breathing. The rest of the group began gathering weapons. Edgy proceeded out of the building and lowered the cage, which contained a human in plate. I rushed after my feline companion, concerned any social faux paus he might make might lose us a valuable ally. The gentleman was thanking Edgy profusely for his rescue when I arrived. I quickly introduced myself and learned the man’s name was Calodar. He had an accent from the realm that I recognized, but could not quite place. Calodar explained that he had been captured by orcs and transported to the kobold warren. He was also in a hurry to gain his equipment back and marched toward the remaining building in the cavern to retrieve it. Edgy ran ahead of us and entered the shack. I stayed with the man so he could see his way. I asked him where he hailed from and replied that he was from Nurle. I had heard of it, and had a generally positive impression of the place. We exchanged other pleasantries and explained in general terms why we were in this place. He said he was looking for an item and I said we were looking for a way out after being imprisoned. We left the explanations with these polite vagaries. Calodar and I strode into the crude stone building and found Edgy rifling through a pair of packs. Calodar went to the far wall and hefted a mighty greatsword. Calodar placed the enormous sword in a back scabbard and remarked, “There should be a bag of uncut gems in one of those packs.” “I did not find any,” Edgy replied. I highly suspected Edgy was lying, but said nothing. Afterall, Calodar had a generally favorable impression of the feline. No sense in ruining it prematurely. Edgy would invariably do so of his accord in time. ***** Calodar was introduced quickly round to the rest of the group and it was agreed we would not wait for the return of our kobold conspirator. The kobold had upheld his first part of the bargain, no sense in waiting to find out if he would remain complicit. A quick discussion yielded that Calodar thought the item he was seeking lay in an orc encampment some travel distance away and the way out was through the encampment too. A joint venture was quickly called for and the stalwart group quickly set off into the dark tunnels. Travelling some distance we came to a chasm bisecting our tunnel. There was a large wicker-style basket with four ropes attached to it lashed to our side of the chasm. “What was this for?” Shen inquired. “Oh, when they brought me this way they had four flying kobolds lift me across in this basket,” Calodar explained. This explanation astonished me on a number of levels. First was the matter-of-fact way Calodar explained his spanning of the gorge. It was like a farmer pointing to a mule to explain how he got to chapel - no big deal. Second, Calodar had completely failed to mention there was an enormous chasm, probably in the neighborhood of one hundred feet deep and twenty-five feet wide in our path. Had he mentioned this back in the kobold warren, we might have scrounged something to help us bridge this gap. I was starting to understand how this gent in plate was captured by orcs.... We agreed someone would take a long segment of rope, climb down the chasm, climb up the opposite side, and secure the rope on the opposing side. Edgy volunteered. No one objected. Edgy skillfully traversed the chasm and Elros quickly scooted across the gap as well. Next came the half-orc, barbarian Thock - two-thirds of the way across there was a SNAP and Thock was tumbling down. He whirled his arms and tried to gain purchase on the chasm wall with no success. Shen once again came to the rescue and cast [I]Fortuitously Falling of Featherly Descent[/I] and saved Thock. Thock eventually made his way back up climbing the chasm wall after numerous missteps and crashes. Repairs to the rope were made and the rest of the group made it across intact. Edgy had been trying to get the group’s attention as he waved a collection of small white bones around. “Look at these!” he exclaimed. “Very strange, very strange,” he muttered. Others in the group examined the bones carefully and did note that they were unusually clean and bright white. It was as though the bones had been placed in a mild acidic bath. I was alarmed as to what this portended. But, there was nothing for it - our path lay ahead. ***** As had become our standard, Edgy worked the dark passage ahead of the group. After a short while we heard a muffled whine. We rushed ahead with light and saw Edgy stuck in a quivering mass of translucent jelly appearing very much like a fly in amber. This gurgling, undulating mass was heading towards us with our feline companion enveloped within. Edgy managed somehow to escape behind the square-shaped beast, but the beast kept slithering towards us. I wondered if its alien intelligence somehow knew it had us trapped by the chasm that was to our immediate rear. I called down a Greater Glorious Bolt of Kord down on the creature that not only caused tremendous damage to the beast, but made it much easier to see and attack with the glowing nimbus of light that surrounded it. I fully expected to hear the howl of an angry charge coming from Thock and his weapon digging into the jelly. Instead, Thock retrieved a javelin, that looked much like a river reed in his hand and tossed it at the creature. Thock was willing to charge an entire warren of kobolds, but threw a stick at a disadvantaged enemy! Trying to parse Thock’s system of combat strategy was clearly beyond me. Elros followed up Thock’s meager contribution with a sling bullet. I endeavored not to let this boon of Kord go without taking advantage of it. I hefted the battleaxe I had taken from the dead orcs in the warren and charged the beast. A mighty swing sent amoeba-like matter spraying the sides of the tunnel. My god’s will surged through me and I made another massive swing chunking pieces of the beast about. The beast seemed unstoppable and continued towards me. With tentacle-like pods it reached for me. I jumped backwards. It reached for me again. And this time - I was enveloped. I was encased in this jelly-like substance and could feel an itching, burning sensation on my skin. Nevermind the fact I could not breathe at all. I admit I was feeling panicked. Then the calm of Kord came to me. I prayed fervently and quickly. Kord’s answer came immediately - in an instance the creature died and its jelly-like body fell away from me. I was saved by the grace of Kord! Someone later said a sling bullet from Elros had downed the beast, but those without faith often miss the miracle. A quick survey found several items of interest preserved in the creature. I was given a scroll case containing a prayer of a higher valence than my discipline. I endeavored to use it only in case of emergency. We traveled a bit further and then made camp for the night. As I cleaned the orc hide armor I had taken from the warren the best I could I reflected on the day’s events. Kord’s abundant blessings on me were manifest in so many ways, and yet, my companions did not seem to have taken note. Then I realized, with great humility, I was sent by Kord as a beacon of hope and light for these folks. My example before Kord was the important thing - I was a living testament to my lord. Thus reassured of my divine mission, I sank into a peaceful sleep. [/QUOTE]
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The Saga of Lucius Victorium Gnaeus (A pogre storyhour) Episode Fifteen
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