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The Stigma of D&D OR Help! I'm Stuck in the D&D Closet?
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<blockquote data-quote="Chupacabra" data-source="post: 1656529" data-attributes="member: 17708"><p>Although I am not an 100% out of the closet I'm-loud-and-I'm-proud shout it from the rooftops D&D'er to society at large, all my peers at work (I am an Assistant District Attorney (prosecutor)) know that I am quite the gamer. They know I own a bunch of computer/console gaming platforms: because I self-depreciatingly joke about them all of the time. They know I frequent comic-book stores: because I self-depreciatingly joke about them all of the time. They know that I get together every Wednesday night with a bunch of non-work folks, hang out, drink a few beers, and play something (usually D%D). They know this because again, I joke about it alot. At the end of a long hard day, especially after a big trial, I am not shy about say that I am going home to either "Kill Nazis" (play computer games) or "Kill Orcs" (play D&D).</p><p></p><p>I get my share of flak for my D&D playing from my peers, but it seems that every one of us has some odd hobby or quirk that we freely embrace and freely take a good-natured ribbing for. My collection of work friends include gun nuts, guitar nuts, biking nuts, baseball nuts, karaoke nuts, etc. We are all, in our own special twisted ways, nerd or fanatics about something that the rest of society at large may see as a bit dodgy, childish, or strange. We all take sh*t for our obsessive hobbies, but we all dish it right back out. None of us are socially maladjusted. All of us bathe regularly. All of us are married with spouses that either share in / are supportive of / are casually indifferent to our obsessive hobbies. All of us joke about how we obsess about our own particular "thing".</p><p></p><p>And you know what, every time I have a question about guns, or sports, or music, I go to one of those fanatics and we have a decent conversation about their particular area of expertise. They do not try to convert me or wierd me out by talking strange jargon. Same goes for me: I am not trying to convert everyone I meet into a gamer nor do I go around loudly extoling the virtues of D&D, with a twelve-sider rattling thru my fingers. If they have a question about computers, or videogames, etc., I'm the office go-to guy for that. I'm the guy everyone pesters about what game (video, computer, or board) to get their brother / cousin / nephew for Christmas or a birthday.</p><p></p><p>Just about all these guys played D&D at some time or another in their lives, and a few were much more into it than I ever was growing up (I never, for example, founded a D&D club in High School, like one of my work buddies did: I actually <em>wanted</em> to get laid in High School). No, I wouldn't say that I'm <em>proud</em> that I'm a 34 year old D&D'er - still playing a game I picked up at age 10. But I'm certainly not <em>ashamed</em> of it either. Its a hobby, nothing more, nothing less. Not a way of life, not a religion, simply a pasttime. I derive pride from my family, my work, etc. </p><p></p><p>There is a big, big middle ground between an "in the closet D&D'er" and the dude with the Frazetta posters all over his cubicle wearing the t-shirt that says "Wizards do it by the Book". Find that middle ground, and embrace it.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Chupacabra, post: 1656529, member: 17708"] Although I am not an 100% out of the closet I'm-loud-and-I'm-proud shout it from the rooftops D&D'er to society at large, all my peers at work (I am an Assistant District Attorney (prosecutor)) know that I am quite the gamer. They know I own a bunch of computer/console gaming platforms: because I self-depreciatingly joke about them all of the time. They know I frequent comic-book stores: because I self-depreciatingly joke about them all of the time. They know that I get together every Wednesday night with a bunch of non-work folks, hang out, drink a few beers, and play something (usually D%D). They know this because again, I joke about it alot. At the end of a long hard day, especially after a big trial, I am not shy about say that I am going home to either "Kill Nazis" (play computer games) or "Kill Orcs" (play D&D). I get my share of flak for my D&D playing from my peers, but it seems that every one of us has some odd hobby or quirk that we freely embrace and freely take a good-natured ribbing for. My collection of work friends include gun nuts, guitar nuts, biking nuts, baseball nuts, karaoke nuts, etc. We are all, in our own special twisted ways, nerd or fanatics about something that the rest of society at large may see as a bit dodgy, childish, or strange. We all take sh*t for our obsessive hobbies, but we all dish it right back out. None of us are socially maladjusted. All of us bathe regularly. All of us are married with spouses that either share in / are supportive of / are casually indifferent to our obsessive hobbies. All of us joke about how we obsess about our own particular "thing". And you know what, every time I have a question about guns, or sports, or music, I go to one of those fanatics and we have a decent conversation about their particular area of expertise. They do not try to convert me or wierd me out by talking strange jargon. Same goes for me: I am not trying to convert everyone I meet into a gamer nor do I go around loudly extoling the virtues of D&D, with a twelve-sider rattling thru my fingers. If they have a question about computers, or videogames, etc., I'm the office go-to guy for that. I'm the guy everyone pesters about what game (video, computer, or board) to get their brother / cousin / nephew for Christmas or a birthday. Just about all these guys played D&D at some time or another in their lives, and a few were much more into it than I ever was growing up (I never, for example, founded a D&D club in High School, like one of my work buddies did: I actually [I]wanted[/I] to get laid in High School). No, I wouldn't say that I'm [I]proud[/I] that I'm a 34 year old D&D'er - still playing a game I picked up at age 10. But I'm certainly not [I]ashamed[/I] of it either. Its a hobby, nothing more, nothing less. Not a way of life, not a religion, simply a pasttime. I derive pride from my family, my work, etc. There is a big, big middle ground between an "in the closet D&D'er" and the dude with the Frazetta posters all over his cubicle wearing the t-shirt that says "Wizards do it by the Book". Find that middle ground, and embrace it. [/QUOTE]
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