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The Untold Adventures of Fap Longwood & Friends!
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<blockquote data-quote="mikeawmids" data-source="post: 8003548" data-attributes="member: 6776411"><p><u>The Adventures of Fap Longwood #3 (Lost Mine of Phandelver)</u></p><p></p><p>Sadly, it seems the heroes’ employer is literally in another castle!</p><p></p><p>The party exit the cave system and complete the journey to Phandalin. Two dozen modest homesteads stand amidst the tumbled ruins of a bygone age. Mara makes a mental note to examine the ancient stonework when she gets the chance. Gundren and Sildar had made reservations to share a room at the Stonehill Inn, so the party head there first. Fap tosses a handful of copper to some children playing in the street and asks them to keep an eye on the wagon while the party freshen up. After arranging their lodgings, the heroes convene in the common room and discuss their next move over a flagon of ale.</p><p></p><p>Sildar reveals that he is a member of the Lords Alliance. He explains that while he did take the contract to guard Gundren on the road, the real reason he came to Phandalin was to track down a renegade nobleman called Iarno Albrek. Sildar is prepared to reward the heroes for any information leading to the wastrel’s capture.</p><p></p><p>The innkeeper warns the party to steer clear of the Redbrands, a gang of thugs who have been stirring up trouble in town. They are easily identifiable by the red armour they all wear, supposedly stained that colour by blood. Horatio snorts into his ale, sending foam everywhere.</p><p></p><p><strong>“Sounds like a right bunch of arseholes!”</strong> he laughs.</p><p></p><p>Brian asks if the town is facing any other problems that a group of well-intentioned heroes could resolve.</p><p></p><p><strong>“I think you meant to say <em>‘well compensated’</em>,”</strong> Horatio adds helpfully.</p><p></p><p>Apparently, there are rumours of an orc raiding party roaming the Triboar Trail. The heroes agree to deal with the orcs, should their paths cross.</p><p></p><p>One of the youths Fap paid to watch the wagon rushes into the common room.</p><p></p><p><strong>“Oi! Elf-Ears! Some blokes are nicking your stuff!”</strong></p><p></p><p>The heroes head outside and interrupt four human thugs in the process of hijacking their unattended wagon. All four men are wearing red armour.</p><p></p><p><strong>“Get off our wagon!”</strong> Horatio roars.</p><p></p><p><strong>“I think you're mistaken, stranger,”</strong> one of the Redbrand thugs replies with an unpleasant smirk, <strong>“This is our wagon, aint’ that right lads? Unless you want trouble, best you lot were moving on.”</strong></p><p><strong></strong></p><p><strong>“Perhaps we can sort this out over a round of drinks…?” </strong>Brian suggests, but his attempt at diplomacy is undermined when Horatio takes a swing at the nearest robber.</p><p></p><p>Unfortunately, he misses and slaps one of the two oxen still hitched up to the wagon on the rump. The beast bellows and begins to move forward, dragging the wagon. The two Redbrand thugs standing in the wagon lose their balance and tumble to the ground. The runaway wagon begins to pick up speed – it is bearing down on an old woman s-l-o-w-l-y crossing the street, oblivious to her impending doom!</p><p></p><p>Fap runs after the runaway wagon, leaps onto the driver’s bench and tries – unsuccessfully – to slow the beasts. Mara casts Magic Missile, targeting three of the wagon’s four wheel and blasting them to flinders. The wagon grinds to a halt and the old lady is saved!</p><p></p><p>It swiftly dawns on the Redbrands that they have picked a fight above their weight and the ruffians disengage. The heroes let them go with a stern warning. A grizzled old man approaches the group, introducing himself as Daran Edermath (retired adventurer).</p><p></p><p><strong>“The Redbrands are easily startled,”</strong> he says, <strong>“But they will be back – and in greater numbers.”</strong></p><p></p><p>Daran offers to hide the party in his orchard. The heroes don’t want to abandon their wagon in the street, but with only one wheel, it’s not going anywhere. Daran reassures the heroes that even if the Redbrands do abscond with their provisions, they will surely take the ill-gotten goods to their headquarters in the ruin of Tresendar Manor. Sildar opts to remain in town and keep an eye on things there, since the Redbrands did not see him and the heroes together.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="mikeawmids, post: 8003548, member: 6776411"] [U]The Adventures of Fap Longwood #3 (Lost Mine of Phandelver)[/U] Sadly, it seems the heroes’ employer is literally in another castle! The party exit the cave system and complete the journey to Phandalin. Two dozen modest homesteads stand amidst the tumbled ruins of a bygone age. Mara makes a mental note to examine the ancient stonework when she gets the chance. Gundren and Sildar had made reservations to share a room at the Stonehill Inn, so the party head there first. Fap tosses a handful of copper to some children playing in the street and asks them to keep an eye on the wagon while the party freshen up. After arranging their lodgings, the heroes convene in the common room and discuss their next move over a flagon of ale. Sildar reveals that he is a member of the Lords Alliance. He explains that while he did take the contract to guard Gundren on the road, the real reason he came to Phandalin was to track down a renegade nobleman called Iarno Albrek. Sildar is prepared to reward the heroes for any information leading to the wastrel’s capture. The innkeeper warns the party to steer clear of the Redbrands, a gang of thugs who have been stirring up trouble in town. They are easily identifiable by the red armour they all wear, supposedly stained that colour by blood. Horatio snorts into his ale, sending foam everywhere. [B]“Sounds like a right bunch of arseholes!”[/B] he laughs. Brian asks if the town is facing any other problems that a group of well-intentioned heroes could resolve. [B]“I think you meant to say [I]‘well compensated’[/I],”[/B] Horatio adds helpfully. Apparently, there are rumours of an orc raiding party roaming the Triboar Trail. The heroes agree to deal with the orcs, should their paths cross. One of the youths Fap paid to watch the wagon rushes into the common room. [B]“Oi! Elf-Ears! Some blokes are nicking your stuff!”[/B] The heroes head outside and interrupt four human thugs in the process of hijacking their unattended wagon. All four men are wearing red armour. [B]“Get off our wagon!”[/B] Horatio roars. [B]“I think you're mistaken, stranger,”[/B] one of the Redbrand thugs replies with an unpleasant smirk, [B]“This is our wagon, aint’ that right lads? Unless you want trouble, best you lot were moving on.” “Perhaps we can sort this out over a round of drinks…?” [/B]Brian suggests, but his attempt at diplomacy is undermined when Horatio takes a swing at the nearest robber. Unfortunately, he misses and slaps one of the two oxen still hitched up to the wagon on the rump. The beast bellows and begins to move forward, dragging the wagon. The two Redbrand thugs standing in the wagon lose their balance and tumble to the ground. The runaway wagon begins to pick up speed – it is bearing down on an old woman s-l-o-w-l-y crossing the street, oblivious to her impending doom! Fap runs after the runaway wagon, leaps onto the driver’s bench and tries – unsuccessfully – to slow the beasts. Mara casts Magic Missile, targeting three of the wagon’s four wheel and blasting them to flinders. The wagon grinds to a halt and the old lady is saved! It swiftly dawns on the Redbrands that they have picked a fight above their weight and the ruffians disengage. The heroes let them go with a stern warning. A grizzled old man approaches the group, introducing himself as Daran Edermath (retired adventurer). [B]“The Redbrands are easily startled,”[/B] he says, [B]“But they will be back – and in greater numbers.”[/B] Daran offers to hide the party in his orchard. The heroes don’t want to abandon their wagon in the street, but with only one wheel, it’s not going anywhere. Daran reassures the heroes that even if the Redbrands do abscond with their provisions, they will surely take the ill-gotten goods to their headquarters in the ruin of Tresendar Manor. Sildar opts to remain in town and keep an eye on things there, since the Redbrands did not see him and the heroes together. [/QUOTE]
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