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X-PATH: Stick Your Citadel Where the Sun Don't Shine (Complete 5 Aug 2004)
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<blockquote data-quote="Capellan" data-source="post: 1553111" data-attributes="member: 6294"><p><span style="font-size: 12px"><strong>5: An IMPolite Reception</strong></span></p><p></p><p>Fabio kicked open the door.</p><p></p><p>Crossbow bolts flew at him, one creasing across his arm.</p><p></p><p>Three kobolds frantically began to reload their weapons. Beyond them clustered the remnants of the tribe: females and young, no more than two dozen in all.</p><p></p><p>Floyd and Smith charged into the room, firing from the hip. One of the crossbows exploded in a shower of splinters, a shard of wood flying up and spearing its scaly owner through the throat.</p><p></p><p>"Eat this!" Beverly threw a grenade toward one of the other creatures, but her aim was off: the metal sphere bounced short, spraying superheated phosphorous in all directions. Amazingly, the target of her attack was left unharmed.</p><p></p><p>Floyd, unfortunately, was not.</p><p></p><p>The synthetic fibres of his rhinestone jumpsuit evaporated in a sheet of flame, singing most of the hair off his incipient pot-belly.</p><p></p><p>"Mah hair ..." he choked out, and collapsed.</p><p></p><p>* * *</p><p></p><p>"Don't <em>ever</em> throw a grenade that close to one of us again." Smith shoved Beverly against a wall and jabbed her in her perfect chest.</p><p></p><p>"Hands off!" she slapped his finger away, "Besides, you did it earlier."</p><p></p><p>"Yeah, but I didn't miss."</p><p></p><p>"What's the big deal, he lived didn't he?" Beverly gestured at Floyd, who was busily styling his hair, using a battered steel shield as a mirror. "You're just cranky because your little convert ran off as soon as we were distracted."</p><p></p><p>"Don't do it again." Smith repeated, turning away. "Floyd, let me know when you're ready to move. Now we've dealt with one lot of these little freaks, I want to go try that dragon door."</p><p></p><p>Even with Floyd unconscious, the fight had lasted less than thirty seconds. Two crossbows simply couldn't stand against three modern weapons. Smith's medical attention had restored the disciple of Elvis to consciousness, while Beverly and Fabio kicked and swore at the non-combatant kobolds, until all the scaly creatures had fled out of the sunken building.</p><p></p><p>"Let's roll." Floyd slipped on a new white cape, and the four humans left the chamber to the corpses of their foes.</p><p></p><p>* * *</p><p></p><p>The 'dragon door' was a heavy, stone portal, with a leering dragon's head carved into it. In the mouth of the head was a small keyhole. The key slipped easily inside, and turned.</p><p></p><p><em>Click.</em></p><p></p><p>"Boom!" Beverly giggled as the three men jumped, then shrugged as they glared at her, "What? Like you weren't thinking it."</p><p></p><p>They made their way through several empty chambers. Dust lay heavy on most of the surfaces, stirring up as they moved. Fabio sneezed.</p><p></p><p>"This is not good for my sinuses."</p><p></p><p>Eventually, they reached a larger room. Floyd played his flashlight over the walls, revealing several niches containing statues.</p><p></p><p>"Last one's empty." He reported, the light lingering on the hollow.</p><p></p><p>"There's an opening in the far wall." Smith moved forward slowly, his own light splashing on the floor. "Big hole in front of it. Looks like spikes in the bottom, too."</p><p></p><p>"Can we jump it?"</p><p></p><p>"Maybe. It's ten feet across."</p><p></p><p>Floyd sucked air through his teeth, then shrugged,</p><p></p><p>"Let's look for a way around, first. Maybe there's a secret door in that alcove without the statue."</p><p></p><p>There wasn't, and - after searching four of the five statues as well - Smith decided to go down into the pit, then try to climb up the other side.</p><p></p><p>"We still have one statue to check." Beverly reminded him.</p><p></p><p>"I think you three can manage that, while I try this way." Smith shrugged, "As long as we get across, does it matter how we do it?"</p><p></p><p>* * *</p><p></p><p>Clinging invisibly to the wall, Jot watched as the lone human clambered down into the pit. The bat-winged imp suppressed a chuckle of anticipation, relishing the thought of attacking this particular man. Even from this distance, the smell of godliness about him was nauseating.</p><p></p><p>Hearing the scuffling sounds of climbing cease, Jot launched himself into the air, then dived into the pit.</p><p></p><p>* * *</p><p></p><p>Smith shouted in alarm as the tiny demon appeared out of thin air, raking at him with its gnarled claws. The wounds it opened burned with a dull ache, and he knew they were tainted with a foul poison.</p><p></p><p>"God shall <em>punish</em> thee for thy sins!" he swung his pick, striking the creature hard and knocking it tumbling through the air. Seizing the opportunity, he dug his fingers into the wall and began to clamber out of the pit.</p><p></p><p>Beverly and Floyd appeared above him, firing down at the small creature, but it flitted back and forth, nimbly dodging their fire, then swooped in to rake Smith across his back. The Mormon grunted, but blocked out the pain, scrambling out onto the floor of the room.</p><p></p><p>"Fall back, and let's give it a warm welcome!" Floyd called, as the creature scratched and bit at Fabio. Showing uncommon teamwork, the four humans all retreated together, opening some space between them and their foe. "Now!"</p><p></p><p>Four grenades arced down on the creature, bursting in sprays of phosphorous and shrapnel. Despite the storm of flame and metal shards, however, the creature swooped out all but unscratched. Cackling gleefully, it ripped its claws across Beverly's shoulder, tearing cloth and flesh alike.</p><p></p><p>"Hey! That was a four hundred dollar blouse!"</p><p></p><p>"Come here, ya little bastard." Floyd leapt forward and snatched the creature out of the air. It bit at his hand as he did so, but the man's grip was too firm to shake. "Mr Smith, if you'll do the honours?"</p><p></p><p><strong><em>BOOM.</em></strong></p><p></p><p>Still the creature struggled, trying to get free. Fabio and Beverly stepped up beside the Mormon.</p><p></p><p><strong><em>BOOM. BOOM. BOOM.</em></strong></p><p></p><p>* * *</p><p></p><p>Battered from all their encounters, the group collapsed to rest and recover. Both Fabio and Beverly felt listless, the creature's poison dulling their reflexes, and all four had suffered serious injuries.</p><p></p><p>"Uh thunk wev don'nough f'one day." Floyd proclaimed through a mouthful of cheeseburger, "We cun rest now."</p><p></p><p>Smith nodded his agreement, taking a careful sip of Cherry Coke. He still wasn't sure if this drink was entirely proper sustenance for a Latter Day Saint.</p><p></p><p>"Let's call in some supplies from back home, get some rest, then continue on." He concurred.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Capellan, post: 1553111, member: 6294"] [SIZE=3][b]5: An IMPolite Reception[/b][/SIZE] Fabio kicked open the door. Crossbow bolts flew at him, one creasing across his arm. Three kobolds frantically began to reload their weapons. Beyond them clustered the remnants of the tribe: females and young, no more than two dozen in all. Floyd and Smith charged into the room, firing from the hip. One of the crossbows exploded in a shower of splinters, a shard of wood flying up and spearing its scaly owner through the throat. "Eat this!" Beverly threw a grenade toward one of the other creatures, but her aim was off: the metal sphere bounced short, spraying superheated phosphorous in all directions. Amazingly, the target of her attack was left unharmed. Floyd, unfortunately, was not. The synthetic fibres of his rhinestone jumpsuit evaporated in a sheet of flame, singing most of the hair off his incipient pot-belly. "Mah hair ..." he choked out, and collapsed. * * * "Don't [i]ever[/i] throw a grenade that close to one of us again." Smith shoved Beverly against a wall and jabbed her in her perfect chest. "Hands off!" she slapped his finger away, "Besides, you did it earlier." "Yeah, but I didn't miss." "What's the big deal, he lived didn't he?" Beverly gestured at Floyd, who was busily styling his hair, using a battered steel shield as a mirror. "You're just cranky because your little convert ran off as soon as we were distracted." "Don't do it again." Smith repeated, turning away. "Floyd, let me know when you're ready to move. Now we've dealt with one lot of these little freaks, I want to go try that dragon door." Even with Floyd unconscious, the fight had lasted less than thirty seconds. Two crossbows simply couldn't stand against three modern weapons. Smith's medical attention had restored the disciple of Elvis to consciousness, while Beverly and Fabio kicked and swore at the non-combatant kobolds, until all the scaly creatures had fled out of the sunken building. "Let's roll." Floyd slipped on a new white cape, and the four humans left the chamber to the corpses of their foes. * * * The 'dragon door' was a heavy, stone portal, with a leering dragon's head carved into it. In the mouth of the head was a small keyhole. The key slipped easily inside, and turned. [i]Click.[/i] "Boom!" Beverly giggled as the three men jumped, then shrugged as they glared at her, "What? Like you weren't thinking it." They made their way through several empty chambers. Dust lay heavy on most of the surfaces, stirring up as they moved. Fabio sneezed. "This is not good for my sinuses." Eventually, they reached a larger room. Floyd played his flashlight over the walls, revealing several niches containing statues. "Last one's empty." He reported, the light lingering on the hollow. "There's an opening in the far wall." Smith moved forward slowly, his own light splashing on the floor. "Big hole in front of it. Looks like spikes in the bottom, too." "Can we jump it?" "Maybe. It's ten feet across." Floyd sucked air through his teeth, then shrugged, "Let's look for a way around, first. Maybe there's a secret door in that alcove without the statue." There wasn't, and - after searching four of the five statues as well - Smith decided to go down into the pit, then try to climb up the other side. "We still have one statue to check." Beverly reminded him. "I think you three can manage that, while I try this way." Smith shrugged, "As long as we get across, does it matter how we do it?" * * * Clinging invisibly to the wall, Jot watched as the lone human clambered down into the pit. The bat-winged imp suppressed a chuckle of anticipation, relishing the thought of attacking this particular man. Even from this distance, the smell of godliness about him was nauseating. Hearing the scuffling sounds of climbing cease, Jot launched himself into the air, then dived into the pit. * * * Smith shouted in alarm as the tiny demon appeared out of thin air, raking at him with its gnarled claws. The wounds it opened burned with a dull ache, and he knew they were tainted with a foul poison. "God shall [i]punish[/i] thee for thy sins!" he swung his pick, striking the creature hard and knocking it tumbling through the air. Seizing the opportunity, he dug his fingers into the wall and began to clamber out of the pit. Beverly and Floyd appeared above him, firing down at the small creature, but it flitted back and forth, nimbly dodging their fire, then swooped in to rake Smith across his back. The Mormon grunted, but blocked out the pain, scrambling out onto the floor of the room. "Fall back, and let's give it a warm welcome!" Floyd called, as the creature scratched and bit at Fabio. Showing uncommon teamwork, the four humans all retreated together, opening some space between them and their foe. "Now!" Four grenades arced down on the creature, bursting in sprays of phosphorous and shrapnel. Despite the storm of flame and metal shards, however, the creature swooped out all but unscratched. Cackling gleefully, it ripped its claws across Beverly's shoulder, tearing cloth and flesh alike. "Hey! That was a four hundred dollar blouse!" "Come here, ya little bastard." Floyd leapt forward and snatched the creature out of the air. It bit at his hand as he did so, but the man's grip was too firm to shake. "Mr Smith, if you'll do the honours?" [b][i]BOOM.[/i][/b] Still the creature struggled, trying to get free. Fabio and Beverly stepped up beside the Mormon. [b][i]BOOM. BOOM. BOOM.[/i][/b] * * * Battered from all their encounters, the group collapsed to rest and recover. Both Fabio and Beverly felt listless, the creature's poison dulling their reflexes, and all four had suffered serious injuries. "Uh thunk wev don'nough f'one day." Floyd proclaimed through a mouthful of cheeseburger, "We cun rest now." Smith nodded his agreement, taking a careful sip of Cherry Coke. He still wasn't sure if this drink was entirely proper sustenance for a Latter Day Saint. "Let's call in some supplies from back home, get some rest, then continue on." He concurred. [/QUOTE]
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