D&D 5E Seeking Help/Critique on a Setting


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QuietBrowser

First Post
On Gnomish Progeny:
Does it help at all if I point out that, living the life they do means that wild gnomes suffer pretty heavy casualties? A hunter-gatherer/homesteader lifestyle is dangerous, and with their small stature, there's lots of critters both natural and not that're out to eat them for lunch. Add in the other big hostile influences of any D&D world - murderous bandits, war, etc - and is it really a bad thing if gnomes have big families?


On Gnomish Subraces:
So, I just had this thought; certain environments in the real world are pretty similar to each other. Would it make sense if some Wildsoul Gnome subraces are based on taking a normal subrace and then a feat? For example, would a Taiga or a Glacier Gnome really be that different to a Forest or Mountain Gnome with Cold Resistance?


On Sun Elf Savagery:

This is one of the biggest issues bugging me about Sun Elves, and I really need a hand figuring it out if you guys are willing. See, like I've mentioned, the sun elves were inspired by the Amazons of Warhammer Fantasy, and one of the minor themes of that race is they retain possession of really ancient and advanced magitek devices (power swords, laser rifles, etc) - which they can't hope to replicate themselves. They just struggle to preserve them and pass them down as sacred relics.

I'd like to replicate this for my sun elves, I just... how can I do this without being offensive? Any ideas?
 

Bitbrain

Lost in Dark Sun
On Sun Elf Savagery:
This is one of the biggest issues bugging me about Sun Elves, and I really need a hand figuring it out if you guys are willing. See, like I've mentioned, the sun elves were inspired by the Amazons of Warhammer Fantasy, and one of the minor themes of that race is they retain possession of really ancient and advanced magitek devices (power swords, laser rifles, etc) - which they can't hope to replicate themselves. They just struggle to preserve them and pass them down as sacred relics.

I'd like to replicate this for my sun elves, I just... how can I do this without being offensive? Any ideas?

Why not just say that because they prioritized alchemy over other technologies, the Sun Elves have lost the knowledge of how to develop magitech weaponry?
They would still possess such devices, would still know not to push the big red button unless things have gone totally out of control, but they wouldn't know how to make new ones from scratch.
 

On Gnomish Progeny:
Does it help at all if I point out that, living the life they do means that wild gnomes suffer pretty heavy casualties? A hunter-gatherer/homesteader lifestyle is dangerous, and with their small stature, there's lots of critters both natural and not that're out to eat them for lunch. Add in the other big hostile influences of any D&D world - murderous bandits, war, etc - and is it really a bad thing if gnomes have big families??
There is 'dangerous' and then there is 'over 90% mortality rate'. Gnomes living a long time is already going to give them large families. I'd suggest that being cut off from the feywild has had an impact on their fertility as a race. It would be really hard to exist as viable communities with that level of attrition.

If you want an idea of how the Cogsoul gnomes may have a high rate of birth, but still lose a lot before they breed, look up the Chua, from the Wildstar MMO.
Actually, look them up anyway: they might provide some inspiration. Or nightmares.

On Gnomish Subraces:
So, I just had this thought; certain environments in the real world are pretty similar to each other. Would it make sense if some Wildsoul Gnome subraces are based on taking a normal subrace and then a feat? For example, would a Taiga or a Glacier Gnome really be that different to a Forest or Mountain Gnome with Cold Resistance?
Reducing the number of subraces, but still allowing regional variations would be elegant.


On Sun Elf Savagery:

This is one of the biggest issues bugging me about Sun Elves, and I really need a hand figuring it out if you guys are willing. See, like I've mentioned, the sun elves were inspired by the Amazons of Warhammer Fantasy, and one of the minor themes of that race is they retain possession of really ancient and advanced magitek devices (power swords, laser rifles, etc) - which they can't hope to replicate themselves. They just struggle to preserve them and pass them down as sacred relics.

I'd like to replicate this for my sun elves, I just... how can I do this without being offensive? Any ideas?
I'm not sure how that would be viewed as offensive, but anyway:
They are all descended from an enclave of healers and biological researchers. It was never intended to be independently viable, and probably relied on outside support. The loss of a large proportion of their number when they were cut off probably left them with no experts in thaumatech or arcanomechanics. Even at our current level of technological knowledge, a biological sciences research expedition in the amazon might have someone able to repair their computers, but they would have to get the parts shipped in from elsewhere. Again, the human tech from warhammer 40k can be a reference.

Maybe the Sun Elves are able to recharge their devices through a few remaining solar collectors. The rituals that have developed around them and this process have given outsiders the impression that they worship the sun - hence their name.
 

QuietBrowser

First Post
Gnome Families:
Hmm... would it help if I just said that gnomes tend to have large families and keep the lore of stosser and ellar without explicitly saying just how many kids gnomes have? Because it's an angle I really like, but this is sinking into the realm of being overly dull by way of being overly realistic.

Sun Elves:
With the Sun Elf "savagery", I'm basically trying to establish why they haven't been able to rediscover or reinvent the magitek themselves over the centuries. I mean, there's got to be a reason why you don't have little sun elves tinkering and trying to invent the materials themselves, right?

Hmm... maybe I'm overthinking it? Maybe, like Cap'n Kobold said, they just didn't have tech support left after the Winnowing, and they discouraged "playing" with their precious supply of magitek to avoid breaking something that was irreplaceable, and over the generations this evolved into a cultural taboo that combined with their own lack of access to non-biological materials?

Basically, it's not that they can't become artificers, it's that 1: they live where artificering isn't really viable, and 2: they're culturally discouraged from it. Does that make sense?

Looking Ahead:
Hmm... You guys have really helped a lot with the refinement of races. I'm trying to think of where to go next. Does it make sense to focus on expanding the bases of the races present in the Known World first - maybe even do full-on racial lore writeups for them as part of that? - before moving on to foreign races like the Elves, Hutaakans, Gnolls, Hobgoblins and Ratfolk?

If that's the case, then the remaining races of the Known World currently stand at Goliaths, Shyfters, Dhampirs, Vyrloka, and Mortif. Any preferences for which to discuss next?
 
Last edited:

Quickleaf

Legend
QuietBrowser said:
There are four major things I want to tackle at this particular point, and which I could use help with deciding what to focus on. Any opinions?

History - At the moment, I have barely three or four notes of historical features, and no real clues for even beginning to proceed on this.

I'll first ask: Why is it important to you to have an expansive history for your setting? Are you looking to write a novel and wish to provide the reader with an immersive experience? What's your goal with going into depth with the history? For example, if you were a DM running the 1st adventure of a campaign, you really don't need much history because most players aren't going to care unless it directly affects their adventure.

Often when I hit writer's block, I go back to great literature or blogs & random generators. Since a thorough discussion of literature is beyond the scope of this topic, I'll list a few sources that may be helpful to breaking your writer's block:
http://inkwellideas.com/worldbuilding/
http://www.enworld.org/forum/showthread.php?74226-History-Generator
https://www.fantasist.net/timeline.shtml

Mapping the Other Lands: The "Known World", or Daggerland as I'm tentatively calling it, has a rough but decent outline available to it. The other lands should probably get a similar level of treatment at some point.

What's your question?

Fleshing Out Races: As you can see above, I've got a lot of races in this setting, but at most I have cliff-notes of each. I'd like to pick one and start fleshing it out some more; anyone interested in a particular topic?

I think you have way too many races and far too little detail. Often where I focus attention on culture/species design is what I need for the next chapter I'm writing or the next game I'm running. Without that sort of imperative, maybe you need to establish some priorities? Otherwise you're liable to get overwhelmed.

For example: Humans. Look at other races as deductive from human identity – gnomes are "science/tech. guys" in your setting so that probably isn't going to be the focus of any of your human cultures. And goliath are "primitive mountain-dwellers", so no need for an aboriginal human culture based in the mountains. If you keep asking that difficult question – "what defines humans? how are they substantively difference from race X" – you'll definitely make progress.

"The Inner World?": I had a thread elsewhere about an Inner World sub-setting that, sadly, crashed and burned. I'm wondering if I can try to salvage it by grafting this pulpy sub-setting to the Quietus. I'm not set on doing so, but I'd like to discuss the possibility at some point.

I think you have enough design work ahead of you. This would be stretching you too thin right now, based on what I'm reading.

One question I have for you: How is your setting any different from Warhammer, besides anthropomorphic animal races?
 

QuietBrowser

First Post
One question I have for you: How is your setting any different from Warhammer, besides anthropomorphic animal races?
Firstly, thank you for your post. Secondly, to answer your question: the biggest differences are that my setting has a far more hopeful tone than in Warhammer, and it has a more Heroic Fantasy portrayal. In Warhammer, everything is doomed and nothing you do ultimately matters - and in the roleplaying game, you are weak and worthless and will never achieve anything of import. In my setting, there is a very real chance to make things better, and you can, in the best D&D tradition, go from nothing to a world player if you have courage, skill and luck.

Does that answer your question?


I really don't like overloading my posts, but this is something that begun bothering me when I was on my morning walk, so I really need to get it off my chest.

Useless Races?
As I actually started thinking about them, I realized something: I don't know if I actually need Minotaurs, Shyfters or Goliaths.

I like the 4e fluff for minotaurs well enough as a fallen empire, but I don't know if it works as well in a setting like this, where more focus is on the material plane than on the doings of gods and primordials. Maybe it can be adapted, but I don't know, they feel kind of superfluous.

Shifters (with or without a "ye olde english" rename) feel really superfluous. What does a watered-down werebeast actually offer in a setting where beastfolk already exist and are accepted as part of society? Maybe is best just to drop them for a different setting entirely.

Likewise, goliaths; what can I actually do with these guys? They do allow for "Big Guy" characters who're demihumans instead of beastfolk, but technically, hobgoblins and sun elves will fill that niche from a demihuman angle and gnolls from a beastfolk angle. Do goliaths really need to be here? My initial thought was to use them as a morally neutral replacement for ogres, but I don't know if that's viable.


Denizens of Gloomlund
I really like Gloomlund's concept. Inspired by Warhammer's Sylvania (and the less-known region of Mousillion in Bretonnia), it is a place where the dead have mingled with the living for generations. It has been ruled by a string of necromancers, vampires, liches, ghosts and other breakers of the barriers between life and death, and that has left its impact on the land and its people. I'm thinking this may be one of the "eyes" of the Netherstorm, with an uncommonly strong connection to the Shadowfell.

One of my big inspirations for this region was an article in Dragon #313 called "Born of Death", which introduced five "Deathtouched" races; the Khatane (Half-Vampire), Fetch (Half-Ghost), Ghedan (Half-Zombie), Ghul (Half-Ghoul) and Mortif (the tiefling-equivalent). Their mechanical execution may not have been so stellar, but they really stuck with me, and I just think they make sense and can fit into a land as troubled as Gloomlund - in what is basically "Necromanticised Balkans", you'd expect there to be a variety of Deathtouched running around, wouldn't you?

To try and explain what I'm thinking for each race...

Dhampirs are the legacy of a particularly long reign by vampire aristocrats. Dark rituals and unholy desires led to the spawning of half-vampire progeny, and when their dark progenitors were dispatched, the dhampirs were left behind to try and forge a new life for themselves. Sort of like Tieflings in the Nentir Vale setting. I really like the motif of distinct vampire clans in Warhammer and in Chronicles of Darkness, so I'd like to emulate that through the dhampirs.

Vrylokas are like dhampirs in that they are humans with vampiric traits. But whilst dhampirs bear vampiric blood and wrestle with the stain of their ancestry, vrylokas willingly damned themselves. They are vampire cultists and ambitious aristocrats who sought some emulation of the power of the Night-Queens and the Darkling Kings. This gives them a more stabilized, if less potent, form of vampiric power.

Fetches owe their lineage to the unstable borders between life and death in Gloomlund. Whether children born of a desire strong enough to kindle life in a human womb from a phantasmal lover, or stillborn babies resurrected, fetches stand with one foot in the land of the living and the other in the land of the dead. Ghostly and enigmatic, they are physically frail, but have a deep and sinister charisma, especially with their ability to emulate or contact spirits.

Ghuls are the deathtouched that nobody likes to talk about. When famine sweeps the land, sometimes, the living must make hard choices to stay alive. Ghuls are tainted by that necrophagy, resulting in cackling, feral-natured freaks with twisted senses of humor and no sense of fear. Whilst not inherently evil, ghuls are unsettling and regarded with suspicion.

Mortif are the truest children of Gloomlund, literally born to the arts of necromancy. Death magic steeps in their souls, slumbers in their blood, whispers in their breath. They don't have to embrace it, but motif are the most common race in Gloomlund for a reason.

So... yeah, do folks think these races make sense for the Gloomlund? Do they add to the setting?


Regional Gnome Feats:
So, I figured that I should go ahead and draft up my thoughts for taiga/glacier/volcano gnomes.

Frostfell Gnome
Prerequisite: Wildheart Gnome Race, Mountain Gnome or Forest Gnome Subrace
The cold northern regions of Bitterland are home to taiga, glaciers and snowcapped mountains. These harsh conditions have had their own effects on the native clans of mountain gnomes and forest gnomes. A frostfell gnome tends to be pale in color; skin ranges from snow-white to icy blue to pale gray, and mottling isn't unheard of. Frostfell forest gnomes often have green and white streaked hair, with icy blue or pine green eyes. Frostfell mountain gnomes usually have slate gray, snow white, or icy blue hair and invariably have icy blue eyes.
Effect: You gain the Frostfell racial trait, which grants you Resistance to Cold.


Hellfire Gnome
Prerequisite: Wildheart Gnome Race, Mountain Gnome Subrace
Some parts of the Hellfire Crags are too hostile even for the Cogsoul Gomes to tap. But some clans of their mountain gnome cousins have learned to not only survive here, but also to thrive. Hellfire gnomes usually have ash-gray or black skin, but black skin marred with vein-like streaks of reddish-orange isn't unheard of. Their hair is typically a fiery reddish orange or a red-streaked black, and their eyes are fiery orange or red colored.
Effect: You gain the Hellfired racial trait, which grants you Resistance to Fire and Advantage on saving throws against Poison.


Draft Gnome Families Writeup:
Basically, this is what I'm thinking of putting as the lore for gnome families:

Gnome families, or clans, in the Quietus are large and sprawling affairs. Gnomish fertility and reproduction is human-like, but gnome women remain fertile throughout their 180-200 years-long lives, leading to extensive broods. This is balanced out by both the natural mortality rate facing gnomes in the world around them, and the gnomish approach to parenting, which ensures there is usually a gap of several years between siblings - though accidents do occasionally happen.

Wildheart Gnomes are the more fecund of the two races, which sages have argued may stem either from their close bond to nature or simply from their comparatively higher mortality rate. The families of these gnomes are typically larger than those of their relatives; twins are the norm for Wildhearts, and they tend to breed again as soon as they consider their child ready, averaging five to seven years between pregnancies. The rare births of triplets or, all but unheard of, quadruplets, lead to several more years of waiting before they expand their family.

Cogsoul Gnomes are less fecund; single births are the norm for them, and they never have more than two children in a single pregnancy - and that is quite rare. Their intense focus on education also means that Cogsoul gnomes go much longer between births; ten years is the norm, and many families may only have one child every fifteen to twenty years.

Because of this, gnomish has two different words for sibling. "Stosser" refers to siblings of the same "generation", children who were brought up in the same house together. "Ellar" refers to siblings who are not stosser - those who were born and moved out of the house before a gnome was born, or those who grew up after they left the house. Gnomes are closest to their stosser, obviously, but their ellar are also recipients of gnomish family loyalty.
 

QuietBrowser

First Post
I really don't like double-posting, but I figured this thread could use a bump. I do hope you folks don't mind if I put my mind to work on setting crunch as well as setting fluff?


I've had these racial outlines set fairly solidly in my head for a while now. I need to talk with you guys more before I can hope to work on the Haffun, Dhampir and Vryloka.


Cogsoul Gnome
Ability Score Modifiers: +2 Intelligence, +1 Constitution
Size: Small
Speed: 25 feet
Vision: Normal
Tinker: As per the Rock Gnome racial trait (5e PHB pg37).
Field of Expertise: Choose between the Apokalypsi, Automata, Epikrato, Exelixi, Katastrofi, Metaptropi, Prostasia, Skafoi, and Dabbler Guilds. You gain further racial traits depending on which guild that you chose.


Apokalypsi Guild
Study of Communication: You gain a bonus language.
Devices of Discovery: You can use your Tinker trait to build the following devices:
* Communicator: You can use this device to gain basic comprehension of a spoken language you do not otherwise understand. Intelligence (Insight) or other checks may be required to understand more complicated aspects of the language.
* Translator: You can use this device to gain Advantage on Intelligence checks made to decipher foreign or ancient languages.
* Analyzer: You can use this device to gain Advantage on an Intelligence check made to determine the physical nature of something - the composition of a chunk of rock, the identity of a nugget of an unknown mineral, the precise type of poison applied to a cup, etcetera.
Thorough Analyst: You have Proficiency in Insight.


Automata Guild
Master of Constructs: You have Advantage on Intelligence and Charisma checks made against creatures with the Construct type.
Maker of Life: You can use your Tinker trait to build the following devices:
* Little Helper: This little automaton acts as an extra set of hands when you're working. During Downtime, you have Advantage on checks made to complete activities relating to studying or constructing.
* Message Bearer: This little construct can move about independently of you - it has the same stats as any other Tinker device, but has a Movement speed of 10 feet, a Fly speed of 30 feet, and cannot attack. It can carry a message of up to 25 words to an individual you designate, and can convey messages back from the recipient.
* Spying Eye: This little construct can move about independently of you - it has the same stats as any other Tinker device, but has a Movement speed of 10 feet, a bonus to Stealth checks equal to your Proficiency bonus, and cannot attack. This construct can record up to 1 hour's worth of what it sees and play it back for you, but anything it has seen must be erased before it can record again.


Epikrato Guild
Principles of Manipulation and Domination: You can cast the Mage Hand and Friends cantrips using Intelligence as your spellcasting ability score.
The Science of Influence: You have Proficiency in one Charisma skill of your choice.


Exelixi Guild
Medicinal Mastery: You have Proficiency in Medicine.
Surgeon's Gear: You can use your Tinker ability to create Antivenom, Healing Potions and Vaccines (treat as Antivenom, but applies to Disease instead of Poison).


Katastrofi Guild
The Science of War: You have Proficiency with Simple Firearms and with one Martial Firearm of your choice.
Tools of Destruction: You can use your Tinker ability to create a set of (10 times Int modifier, minimum of 10) bullets.


Metaptropi Guild
Theoreticals of Transformation: You have Advantage on Stealth checks made to disguise yourself.
Practicals of Alteration: You can cast the Minor Illusion and Mending cantrips, using Intelligence as their spellcasting ability score.


Prostasia Guild
The Science of Defense: You have Proficiency with Medium Armor and Light Armor.
Instruments of Protection: You can use your Tinker trait to create the following devices:
* Rebreather: This doubles the duration its bearer can hold their breath.
* Gas Mask: Gives you or any other humanoid who carries it Advantage on saving throws against gas-based attacks, such as a ghoul's stench.


Skafoi Guild
The Importance of Navigation: You can apply double your normal Proficiency bonus to Survival checks made to determine direction or establish your present location.
Tools of the Traveler: You have Advantage on checks made to construct or repair vehicles.
Healthy Body, Healthy Mind: You have Proficiency in Athletics and increase your base movement speed by +5 feet, giving you Movement 30 feet.


Dabbler Guild
Information Packrat: You can apply half of your normal Proficiency bonus to untrained Intelligence or Wisdom skill checks.
Well-Rounded Education: You have Proficiency in one Intelligence, Wisdom or Charisma skill of your choice.




Wildheart Gnome
Ability Score Modifiers: +1 Wisdom
Size: Small
Speed: 25 feet
Vision: Darkvision 60 feet
Child of Nature: You have Proficiency in Survival. You gain Advantage on Survival checks made in your native terrain, which is indicated by your subrace name. You can always choose Nature and/or Animal Handling as one of your class-granted skill proficiencies.
Native Environment: Choose the Forest Gnome, Mountain Gnome, Swamp Gnome or Water Gnome subrace. You gain additional racial features based on your subrace.


Forest Gnome
Ability Score Increase: +2 Dexterity
Tree Ghost: You have Proficiency in Stealth.
Huntsman's Tools: You have Profiency in the use of the Handaxe, Shortbow and Dagger.
Woodland Trickery: You can cast the Minor Illusion cantrip, using Wisdom as your spellcasting ability score.




Mountain Gnome
Ability Score Increase: +1 Strength, +1 Constitution
Peak-Seeker: You are considered to be Acclimatized to extreme cold and have a Climb speed of 25 feet.
Rugged Life: You have Proficiency in Athletics.




Swamp Gnome
Ability Score Increase: +2 Constitution
Snake-Eater: You have Resistance to Poison damage and Advantge on saving throws against Disease and Poison.
Swampy Tricks: You can cast the Dancing Lights and Infestation cantrips, using Wisdom as your spellcasting ability score.




Water Gnome
Ability Score Increase: +1 Dexterity, +1 Constitution
Aquatic: You have a Swim speed of 30 feet.
Amphibious: You can breathe air and water.




Fetch
Ability Score Modifiers: +2 Charisma, +1 Wisdom
Size: Medium
Speed: 30 feet
Vision: Darkvision 60 feet
Ethereal Stride: As a bonus action, you grant yourself the Incorporeal Movement; this allows you to move through other creatures and objects as if they were difficult terrain. However, you take 1d10 Force damage if you finish your turn inside an object, and going Incorpreal is a Concentration effect you can sustain for up to 1 minute. Once you have used this trait, you must complete a long rest before you can use it again.
Poltergeist Tricks: You can cast the Mage Hand and Dancing Lights cantrips, using Charisma as your spellcasting ability score.




Ghul
Ability Score Modifiers: +2 Constitution, +1 Dexterity
Size: Medium
Speed: 30 feet
Vision: Darkvision 60 feet
Ghoulish Claws: You can use your claws as a natural weapon to make an unarmed strike, allowing you to inflict 1d6 + Dex modifier Slashing damage. Additionally, you have a Climb speed of 20 feet and a Burrow speed of 10 feet.
Filth-Eater: You have Resistance to Poison damage and Advantage on saving throws against Poison and Disease.




Mortif
Ability Score Modifiers: +2 Intelligence, +1 Charisma
Size: Medium
Speed: 30 feet
Vision: Darkvision 60 feet
Grave-Touched Soul: You can cast the Chill Touch and Toll the Bell cantrips, using Intelligence as your spellcasting ability score. At 3rd level, you can cast Ray of Sickness as a 1st level spell. At 5th level, you can cast Ray of Enfeeblement as a 2nd level spell. When you cast either Ray of Sickness or Ray of Enfeeblement with this trait, you cannot do so again until you complete a long rest.
Shake Off Death's Hand: You have Resistance to Necrotic damage. Additionally, when making Death Saving Throws, you make a success on a roll of a 7 or higher.
 

Gardens & Goblins

First Post
I've run 5 homebrew settings in the last 2 year. Out of them, we're still playing one and another is paused until we return. They were all introduced as one-shots, where we tested the themes and execution at the table.

Why am I telling you this?

To save you time and energy.

Running a homebrew is easy. Coming up with a really good homebrew requires an intelligent, critical design methodology. If you're looking to entertain and engage players, you'll need to test what you've got as soon as possible with them so you can respond accordingly.

You can pour hours of work into a setting but if it doesn't click with your table, it won't see much action. You seem to have a fair amount to work with now -- try running a session or three within your world, using some disposable characters if needs. You can add names for places, races and whatever retrospectively, if they come in to play. This way you're building your homebrew efficiently - investing your time in stuff that's going to return adventuring goodness in the short term. A sketch, as it were, of something you believe will be exciting, fun and engaging.

Long term, after a few sessions, you'll know if your homebrew has legs. If it does then you'll find yourself filling in the details as and when required, polishing things up for a final piece. Again, in a way that ensures you're adding time and energy to aspects that will actually come in to play.

You've got a fair amount to be getting on with -- bite the bullet and test it with your players. Build your sketch through some play. Then complete and polish where required. Good luck!
 

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