group age range (how low can you go)??

[HawaiiSteveO]

Our appx. group age is mid to late 30's (some older) -had a new player join us, turns out he's 14!

From first session seems like a nice young man and had fun, but situation bothers me.

Our games are really casual and fun, and we don't have any particular adult storylines and so on. Still, he's 14!

I can't help but think he'd be a better fit playing with friends or at a local game store or something. I usually wouldn't exclude anyone as long as they obeyed the 'social contract'. Still, it just doesn't seem right to me.

 

[LordEntrails]

I've played in my adults (40+) grop in years past with players as young as ... 12?

I used to DM D&D Encounters at game stores regularly with teenagers. Never been a problem for me or the group.

Sure, you might wonder why s/he's not playing with kids there own age, but maybe they don't have friends, are afraid to "come out" to their friends as geek, or maybe they want to play in a more mature group that doesn't do the sophmoric stuff I used to do in D&D as a teenager.

 

[KahlessNestor]

Our society is way too segregated by age anyway. Children learn to be adults by being around adults and being treated as adults. "Teenager" is a sociological construct of the modern world, and many would be better served by spending more time with adults they respect and trust than with their peers.

If he isn't causing a problem, embrace the opportunity this offers.

Sent from my SM-G900P using EN World mobile app

 

[MNblockhead]

I see where you are coming from. I've DM'd games for my son and his friends and even with one of the other dads joining in, I feel like these kids need to get together and play on their own. It seems nearly all the time kids spend socializing these days are arranged and supervised by adults.

On the other hand, if one of your friends brought their teenage son hunting or fishing with you, would you find it strange?

I think it is fine if everyone is okay with it. Sometime us old guys want to hang out without kids around, so make sure how the rest of the group feels about it. If they don't mind, then there shouldn't be a problem.

 

[Enevhar Aldarion]

So how did a minor end up in your gaming group to begin with? Is he a relative of one of your regular members? If not, did anyone in your group know how young he was before he joined?

As for your question, I prefer everyone in any group I play in to be adults, unless a game is planned in advance to be for all ages because someone in the group wants to introduce minor relatives to the world of gaming. This is mostly because I have gamed with players and DMs where someone underage in the group would prevent them from being who they are and holding back or censoring yourself in situations where you do not normally have to tends to not go well.

 

[Mercule]

Most of my group is in their 40s. My daughter is 14. She started playing with us when she was 11 because the wizard player was super late and she was standing right there when we decided we needed to either start play or not, so she picked up the character sheet.

I wouldn't recommend that every 14 year old is appropriate for gaming with adults, nor would I recommend every table for kids (language, theme), but it's worked out pretty well, for us.

As someone who loves the TTRPG hobby, I want to see it thrive. That means bringing in new blood. I figure that teaching new players has a better chance of getting them to stick (and even start) than whatever happens when they just pick up a book at a hobby store. Yes, you have to teach them -- but you do with adults who've never gamed before, too. Yes, they don't get the "act out what you say to the NPC" -- but the same is true for adult novices.

Note: my daughter isn't a "junior member" of the group. When we switched campaigns, last year, my group made it clear to me that she got a full vote (I didn't want to push my kid on them). Her age gives some consideration, mostly in terms of knowing she doesn't have the life experience, but she's expected to carry her weight and understand the rules. In exchange, she gets to participate in the "big girl" conversations as an equal.

 

[Mercule]

As for your question, I prefer everyone in any group I play in to be adults, unless a game is planned in advance to be for all ages because someone in the group wants to introduce minor relatives to the world of gaming. This is mostly because I have gamed with players and DMs where someone underage in the group would prevent them from being who they are and holding back or censoring yourself in situations where you do not normally have to tends to not go well.

There's nothing wrong with this, either. Because everyone who had space to host has kids that would often be within reasonable earshot, the filter was already required, for my group.

If you're too boisterous and can't filter, then it's probably not appropriate to have kids at the table. On a related note, I'd say that any group that can't filter around kids should also avoid playing at a game store unless they've got a back room with a door that you can rent.

 

[Arilyn]

Since the young man is not causing problems, and your group does not stray into more adult themes, there shouldn't be a problem. I know 14 year olds who are more mature than some 40 year olds. My daughters started playing with us when they were 11 and 15. If everyone is having fun, don't sweat it!

 

[Ralif Redhammer]

I certainly understand your reticence, but if the 14-year-old isn’t causing trouble, and his parents are okay with everything, I say give him a chance. It’s an opportunity to help the hobby grow, and work against the greying of it.

I’ve gamed with kids at cons and open tables before. Some are good, some are bad. Much like any player, really. The only difference is that they probably won’t get that Wormy reference, and will generally make you feel even older.

 

[HawaiiSteveO]

I don't want to exclude anyone, although having a 14 year old boy come over to my house and spend hours in the basement with other people I don't really know that well makes me uneasy.

Would it make a difference if it was a 14 year old girl? That's just creepy.

As I said, if I hosted at a public location like library, game store etc. it wouldn't be as big a deal.