After years of gaming...

[geosapient]

I've finally called it quits. The week before Sunday, April 1st was the last I will game with the group I was in.

The last straw was a uh... discussion on tumbling.

Monk: "I'm tumbling into melee with the ogre. I got a 19 on the check."

*Johnson: "You tumble in but the org makes an attack of oppurtunity."

Me: "?" "A 19 should be enough to get him through the squares without an attack of oppurtunity."

Johnson: "No, he needs a 25 or better."

Me: "He's not trying to go through his occupied squares just his threatening squares. The chart shows that if he was trying to go through the spaces that the creature takes he would need a 25+. But, he's only trying to get to the creature."

Monk: "Yeah, I'm only trying to get to him not through him."

Johnson: "FINE! You get to him but are unable to make an attack. We'll see if you're still standing there after he goes!"

Me (again): "That's only 10'. He has a 50' move even at 1/2 speed with the tumble this should only be a move action not full round. (Note: I'm not an expert with tumble so maybe tumble is a full round actio whenever you use it. That just makes it sound like a horrible skill.)

Johnson: *Holds up a book and slaps it (the book)* "What does this say?"

Me and Monk: "It's the DM's Guide."

Johnson: "Who am I?"

Me: "..."

Monk: "*DM's name*"

Johnson: "That's right and what I say goes!"

Me: "Whatever..."

That was close to how that discussion went. If it was only that day (and the only issue that day) I might have still been in the group.

Another issue that day (I was silent for this one) was the rogue (the DM's wife) pulled out a bow for the first time and used it. Since she hadn't carried a bow before and we hadn't been in a town for some time I asked where she got it.

When she said that it was the bow that was found awhile back (the Mighty composite longbow STR 15) I checked my paper and sure enough it was right where I had put it. On my character sheet listed underneath my only magic item, the Quiver of Ehlonna.

How she ended up with the bow that I said I couldn't use at the moment but would keep because I would be able to soon (Druid/Ranger) is beyond me. But that bothered me less than the fact that she only had an 11 strength and was using it without penalty (in melee none-the-less) without provoking attacks of oppurtunity while I always had to cast Arrowmind on myself.

Anyway...

Sunday, April 1st - Johnson and his wife show up

Me: "I'm sorry, Johnson but I must ask you to leave. There's your mat and figures."

Johnson: "What? Why? Is this because of last week?"

Me: "Last week was just the last of a long line of problems. And please, feel free to take any snacks and soda that's here"

Johnson: "No, we brought those for everybody."

Me: (Whatever)

Johnson: "Well, if you change your mind just let us know."

Me: "Maybe sometime in the future I'll game again, but not right now."

Johnson: "See you later."

Me: "Have yourself a good day."

We've been 'friends' too long to just throw it all away. But if I game again it won't be with anyone from that group again (except the monk - he's my brother).

Since then I've been sleeping better. I haven't woken up with my hands buried in the matress with their circulation being cut off (It's an odd feeling to see your hands buried inches into a firm matress and not be able to actually feel the matress).

I've had time to work on my console and computer gaming. When the weather gets better I'll have time to get some yard work done (sometimes they didn't understand that I didn't have time to do much since I'm a night shift worker).

I feel free and without worry. I imagine that this is what it feels like to win the lottery - just to a lesser extent.

I hate breaking routine even to the point of having health problems, but I think this is one of the better descisions I've made. Since most of the people in the group were negative people I feel that I was becoming more negative myself.

* Johnson is referring to the uh... Shadowrun character that gives missions... Yeah, that's it...

 

[DragonLancer]

Sounds to me that you did the right thing. Perhaps having a break will be good for you. Have 6 months off from gaming and see from there.

Take care.

 

[Razz]

Dude, you're like the umpteenth person I now know that quit gaming because of a jerk of a DM. Which is what I don't understand.

Don't let one person ruin a great game for you. Find another DM, seriously. That first scenario was...unbelievably wrong of him. Wow. Hard to believe there're DMs like that guy.

But that's just me. As for you, don't let one guy ruin the game for you. The game is great once you're with the right group of people. I know this one girl that won't even get near D&D just because she used to be DMed by her ex who was being a total [expletive] to her and her gaming buddies when he DMed.

Remember. It's not the game's fault. It's always someone in a D&D group that's ruining it and the best thing to do is just don't game with that person.

 

[Kae'Yoss]

I wouldn't quit playing over one lousy DM, but I would quit his game. If you play with people that aggravate you, the game loses its main advantage: Relax and have fun. If you need some R&R after a game, the game does the opposite it is supposed to do.

Of course, if that was your only game, you're out of the game for now, anyway. If you're really keen on playing again, by all means dive headlong into the group seeking process, but otherwise, it might indeed be a good idea to leave it for some time, since seeking a new group can be a bit tedious.

But I wouldn't throw it all away just because one guy thinks he has to play against you, or be a jerk any other way. They're not worth depriving yourself of entertainment.

So have a good time away from the game, and the best of luck finding a better group!

 

[HellHound]

I quit gaming about this time last year, and it did me WONDERS for alleviating my tensions about gaming as well as bringing back my excitement about the game.

I started gaming about four months after I took my break.

In my particular case, it took me almost a year to figure out that I hadn't burned out on gaming, just on D&D / Fantasy.

 

[3catcircus]

Part of me agrees with you. However, a part of me also agrees with the DM. In the case of the bow, I'm in your corner. But just because the "book" says a 19 is good enough doesn't mean that the DM can't decide that the circumstances warrant a higher or lower DC.

 

[thedungeondelver]

I couldn't follow the tumbling thing mechanically but I can see the DM's side of it - assuming he was fair and consistent in that interpretation throughout the campaign. If that was just a sudden ruling on his part and he'd been by-the-book up until that point, and everyone understood that he was by-the-book until that point, then it was a dick move. If however he'd outlined that this is what would happen when "tumbling" in the course of the game...well, that's a horse of another color.

Regarding the bow? Let me see if I've got this straight: you have a bow, a magic bow. Suddenly, in combat, the party thief comes up with the bow and is using it at none of the disadvantages or requirements you had for the bow (STR 15, you say, plus some magic needed to work it, plus it can't be used in melee). You check your sheet and there's the bow, and the thief has it and is using it.

Specifically, the thief played by the DM's wife is using the bow.

Now let me just say this: I've played in very "confrontational" AD&D games where the party was a group of strangers who were only loosely affiliated, and had the party's thief stealing from other characters, etc. (This doesn't sound like up until that point it was that kind of game, though.) However, it's been my experience that the requirements of a given item - a wand for magic-users, a holy avenger for paladins, poison daggers for assassins* and so on - are always in play. That clever thief who finds himself in possession of the paladin's holy avenger may suddenly find himself apologizing to the paladin and begging the cleric for a couple of cure light wounds spells from the shock he just got - not wielding the sword in the middle of combat.

That sounds exactly like what went down here. That is, there was an item in your possession that you had the specific requirements to use, and a favored (thief) character suddenly had it and was using it willy-nilly.

You did the right thing dude. That was totally a dick move by the DM. Furthermore, its been my experience that once the favoritism slide starts from the DM towards a significant other, it's never going to stop. I'm not saying that it starts automatically when the DM brings his SO into the game (most of the time I don't see that, and that's a good thing), but once it begins in earnest, you and the rest of the players might as well just leave. Because at that point all the DM is doing is trying to make his or her SO happy, not run a good game.

Take some time off, find another group, and come back to the game when you're ready.

 

[DM_Jeff]

Tumbling is a part of movement, you're right, and DM's who let their wives get away with stuff others should not are out there...and they suck-diddly-uck, Flanders.

Don't let this rotten apple ruin your fun. Heck, it sounds like you have a very good grasp of how the rules work, be the DM yourself after summer. When can I roll up a character?

-DM Jeff

 

[ShadowDenizen]

I understand the OP's frustration completely.
My group and I have gone through some arguments that sound similar to that.

DOn't give up altogether, though!
Try a different game (True20, C&C, OSRIC, etc.), or take an break for awhile, see how things go!

 

[Vraille Darkfang]

Johnson: *Holds up a book and slaps it (the book)* "What does this say?"

Me and Monk: "It's the DM's Guide."

Johnson: "Who am I?"

Me: "..."

Monk: "*DM's name*"

Johnson: "That's right and what I say goes!"

Massive Warning Bells there.

He, is, in fact, 100% Wrong.

Without Players the DM is Powerless (as there is nothing to wield power over).

I've been a DM for a Long Time and have never even considered that arguement.

When a DM resorts to that Argument, he's either in way over his head & doesn't want to admit it, or just a jerk.

I think there should be a Rule 0 Subclause A: The DM might always have the final say, but he also has the responsibility to be fair & considerate.