Every once in a while, I wondered how awesome/silly/broken would the Monster Manual's Animals section look if the creature descriptions were scientifically accurate, and included more creatures, while the type descriptions stayed the same. Why?
Well, those of you who are just the tiniest into biology know Mother Nature wrote up some pretty odd mats at times in her big, open-ended sourcebook. Many Animals have Extraordinary abilities Humanoid characters can only dream of getting. On the other hand, thanks to their abysmal will saves, they are easily controlled or influenced by nature-based casters such as Druids, Rangers and Spirit Shamans. Hell, a Commoner could domesticate a breeding pair through Handle Animal. Add Polymorph, and this small bit of realism shatters a campaign like a thin pane of glass.
Some of you might think: 'So, why do we care? There is one part of Third Edition that can't make DMs cry. We should be having a party to celebrate, if anything. Animals are not going to sue us.'
And you are completely right! Animals, and their arbitrarily defined cousins, Vermin and Plants, are just fine as written. They rarely take the spotlight, and the few times they do show up, you can manage with the current rules, or minor homebrew changes.
That said, I'd love to see what hilarity our community can come up with in this regard. I'm not thinking of fully developed creatures - I know most of us don't have the time for that, and those belong to the Homebrew forum anyway. Let's stat out parts that sound funny under the d20 system and have a good laugh out of it^^
Well, those of you who are just the tiniest into biology know Mother Nature wrote up some pretty odd mats at times in her big, open-ended sourcebook. Many Animals have Extraordinary abilities Humanoid characters can only dream of getting. On the other hand, thanks to their abysmal will saves, they are easily controlled or influenced by nature-based casters such as Druids, Rangers and Spirit Shamans. Hell, a Commoner could domesticate a breeding pair through Handle Animal. Add Polymorph, and this small bit of realism shatters a campaign like a thin pane of glass.
Some of you might think: 'So, why do we care? There is one part of Third Edition that can't make DMs cry. We should be having a party to celebrate, if anything. Animals are not going to sue us.'
And you are completely right! Animals, and their arbitrarily defined cousins, Vermin and Plants, are just fine as written. They rarely take the spotlight, and the few times they do show up, you can manage with the current rules, or minor homebrew changes.
That said, I'd love to see what hilarity our community can come up with in this regard. I'm not thinking of fully developed creatures - I know most of us don't have the time for that, and those belong to the Homebrew forum anyway. Let's stat out parts that sound funny under the d20 system and have a good laugh out of it^^
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