D&D 5E Dealing with a trouble player and a major blow up

S

Sunseeker

Guest
I work in debt collection and I'll tell you a secret my boss told me.

Don't be afraid to say "NO". If they're interested in resolving the debt(lets frame this in D&D terms: the situation) they'll come up with a new idea. If they're not really interested in resolving the situation, they won't and they'll throw a fit about how you're not working with them.

There is always room to come to a compromise that works for both DM and player, but sometimes the DM just has to say "NO". A good player will go "Oh, well how about *idea*..." A bad player will tell you off, verbally or non-verbally (usually by falling silent, becoming huffy and combative and generally being difficult to play with).

So you've had problems with this player before and talked to a person you assumed was a friend at the time about them, well she showed how much of a friend she was when she started dating him now didn't she?

Your problem sounds like in large part of simply having the wrong group of friends. I'd take this time to evaluate how important your "friendships" are with these people because they certainly sound like they don't regard you as a friend.

I'd also suggest seeing what you can strike up with this new guy, perhaps this unknown person is life's way of giving you a gateway to better options.
 

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BoldItalic

First Post
@OP: There is a well-known aphorism: When you are in a hole, stop digging.

Do you know why you have been at loggerheads with this man for so many years? Of course you do. It's the woman. Nothing to do with D&D at all. That's just the chosen arena for continuing the conflct. All the best DMing advice from the best DMs in the world isn't going to make the slightest difference; even if you stop playing D&D altogether, you will find ways to continue the squabble.

Now ask yourself: how do you feel about what I've just posted?
 



OP has stopped replying. Has he been killed in a duel with the problem player over the girl?

OP, plz respond.

After I gave my "emotional support" speech to the OP, I poisoned him.

We have the taster's choice moment between two fellas from the D&D neighbahood.

We have everyone being all "Its not your fault...no, you don't understood...its not your fault."

Well, I have an update about MO. I tried to pick him up for our weekly game but he wasn't at his apartment...it was completely barren.

Check your mailbox JC. You might have a message from him saying "...sorry fellas...I gotta go see about a girl..."
 

Nellisir

Hero
You know when my red flag went up? Right here:

I've posted about one of my players before. There is a fairly long thread about it.

If you've got two long threads about one player, it's time to walk.

That said, here's some harsh assessment.

<snipping a bunch of stuff because honestly I don't want to get into it.>

It sounds like you've written this guy off as dumb, you treat him as dumb, and you can't get over it and he knows it. Assigning blame is pretty dumb at this point; you're just not going to get along in a DM/player relationship.

Bottom line. If you walk and no one walks with you, it's not (all) him. Sorry. :/
 



Sacrosanct

Legend
I'm pretty sure at this point that this has really nothing to do with D&D or gaming other than using power in game to make up for power you don't have out of the game. ENWorld isn't exactly the best place to air your Jerry Springer laundry.

In my opinion of course.
 

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