Hussar, I wouldn't be offended. I would tell you to not let the door hit ya on the way out.
I don't suffer from a shortage of players, so if folks don't lke the way I play, I tell them maybe we can have a beer sometime over a movie, but I ain't changing a system that has worked for 16 years because they don't like it. My rulings are final, and I am not a tool the dice use to make decisions. I've met people who don't like my style of play, and I haven't cared one bit. Some folks claim I'm too rigid, and others have sang my praises from the rooftops. My take? I'm seasoned, is all. What is D&D? In addition to a strategy game, a role playing game, and an amusing pass time, it's an elaborate game of Bull Sith. Psychological warfare is part of the game, and one of the greatest weapons a DM has is Rule 0. You wouldn't remove your nuclear arsenal if you were a general in today's day and age, but you wouldn't abuse it either as it can kill everything off if you do.
Besides, questioning isn't my problem. Endless debate is.
I'll give you an example:
Player: I'd like to try sliding down the staircase hand-rail while drawing my sword. Is that possible?
Me: Well, we don't have written rules for that. Let's see, make two dexterity checks.
Player: Why not just one?
Me: It's a complex action, and one that takes balance and coordination. The first check is to slide down the railing, the next check is to see if you maintained your balance while drawing your weapon.
Player: (Succeeds first check, fails second check) Aw, man.
DM: Hmmm. Well you had your sword out, and you were falling to your side, with the railing acting as a fulcrum to your bodie's lever. Roll another dexterity check to see if you landed on your sword for damage.
Player: Okay. (Fails.) But wait. I would have tossed my sword away.
Me: (Thinks.) Hmmm. That's some pretty quick thinking for a 10 intelligence, especially when being caught up in the heat of battle and sliding down the hand railing. Roll an Intelligence check.
Player: (Fails again.) Damn it!
Me: Alright. You failed two checks, so I'm going to rule that you take 1d6 damage from falling on the blade of your sword. Hey, it would have been cool if the dice agreed with you.
Player: Alright. Damn. (drinks beer, lights cigarette, grins a little at his slight misfortune, rolls damage, moves on.)
Most folks lose graciously. It's part of being an adult. Part of being a DM is to dole out appropriate consequences, and I feel the example above (an actual occurence from one of my games) is an appropriate ruling. 1d6 is not crippling at medium levels, especially given the relative probability of rolling a 1. 1 damage? Oh, no, a paper cut. Are you really going to be so petty as to argue over that? The players in my game accept my rulings as final because they are adults, not overly attached to a concept written down on a peice of paper, and are willing to move on. If the player wanted to, he could have cracked open the UA or found a passage I had missed in the DMG, and I would take a look at it. IF the rule in the DMG was outside of core mechanics, I would think it over. IF it seemed better than my system for whatever reason, I would go with that. If it seemed needlessly ofuscated, obtuse, or just ridiculously complex for a simple balancing act gone wrong, I would dismiss it.
Now if the player continued to combat my decision, I'd tell him that my ruling was final. There is no further discussion, we're adults, his character is obviously going to live through this, and i feel the decision makes sense and keeps the game moving at an even clip. I've considered his stance, and I have rejected it on X grounds. He is welcome to try whatever he wants, do whatever he wants, be anything he wants. It's my job to figure out how the world reacts to all this, both when it comes to physics and social aspects. It has nothing to do with a player vs. DM mentality, it's me referreeing the game. He's welcome to play in a different game if he feels that strongly about it.