Guys playing girls (chime in, ladies)

[Timeboxer]

Any insights into the female psyche you want to share? Anything you typically see men doing with female characters that strikes you as wrong?

Wellll... to be honest, no. If you ask me, anything that a male character might do a female character might do, and vice versa. It's just a matter of what gender has what tendencies, as a rule, and men and women aren't really all that different.

Or, to put it a different way: yes. The problem with men playing female characters is that they play them as if the fact that they're female is significant. I mean, I'm a girl, but it's not like I think about this all the time -- most of the time it's just, well, life. It's an advantage sometimes and a disadvantage others, but it becomes a problem when the sex/gender/sexual implications play a role in every aspect of the way the role is played.

...<hopes that wasn't too incoherent>

 

[Gez]

I'm male, but I play in a game with another guy whose PC is female.

The one main problem that I see with his portrayal is that, in trying to play "female", what he actually achieves is "genderless". There are no clues that one could pick up from the character's personality that indicate she's a woman; she's not a male character in a funny suit, either, she's just devoid of gender traits.

Both my male and my female characters tend to be genderless. My female PC tends to be a little more serious, a little more shy of physical violence, and a little more easily annoyed by minor misbehaviours. But differences are minor.

 

[Lord Pendragon]

In other words, playing a female PC is more like playing a male PC than it is different.

This, I think, is the most important bit of advice in this thread so far. Many men fail to do women well, mainly because they are trying too hard. Yes, men and women are different, but in the scope of D&D you aren't going to be able to deal with those kinds of subtleties. And trying often leads to oversimplification and exaggeration that results in a less accurate portrayal. So the best way to play a good female PC...is to not try and play a female PC.

My advice, for what it's worth, is to restrict your "gender-thinking" to a character's backstory. Consider the status of women in the character's society, and build an appropriate backstory that takes that into account.

For instance, in a traditional medieval setting, women were expected to marry and have children above all else. So you might create a character who had a family, but lost her family to a fire. Or perhaps she is estranged. Or perhaps she was a newlywed, but her husband went missing in a foreign war. Perhaps she is barren, and was cast out by her husband for being unable to have children. Then build the PC from there.

Once you actually start playing, don't worry about the PC being a woman, concentrate on playing a PC who lost her family to a fire, or lost her loved one in a foreign war, or cannot have children. You'll be closer to the mark, because you'll be dealing with issues that are gender-specific. But you won't fall into the trap of constantly trying to adjust your role-playing to fit a preconceived notion of how women should behave.

 

[Blue]

Most of the men playing as women tend to go to extremes. I have one (male) friend who like playing female characters, and for the most part they are virgin/goddess or slut/b*tch.

My advice is echos from above. Play a character. Just as you'd have motivations for any other character.

=Blue

 

[IdentityCrisis]

Or, to put it a different way: yes. The problem with men playing female characters is that they play them as if the fact that they're female is significant. I mean, I'm a girl, but it's not like I think about this all the time -- most of the time it's just, well, life.

You may not think about it, but it does seem to matter in my experience. For example, women will often not come out and say what they really mean, even if it means outright lying. A lot of guys hear "it's not a good time for me to see anyone right now" instead of "I just don't like you" from a woman who will turn around and *beg*the next man to call her, or will get "nothing's wrong" from a woman who's *obviously* on the verge of exploding in anger.

Granted, you're right that an individual can go either way. But there are general trends.

 

[Queen_Dopplepopolis]

As a general rule... I find it creepy when men play female characters. I also find it creepy when women play male characters. As a general rule, my DM doesn't even allow cross-gender role playing. I've said it before-- and I know that not many people on the boards hold this particular opinion, as well.

It is probably because I've never met anyone that can do it well or without offending, in the process, everyone at the table.

However, if you are going to do it, pick up some books with strong female characters. I really enjoy some of the female insight in the Wheel of Time books...

In addition to all of the "don't be a slut" advice: Discover what type of female you want to play and talk to women about your character's quirks and personality... I'm sure that all the ladies here on the boards, myself included, would love the chance to sit down and take a look at the backstory of a female character generated by one of the guys... would an interesting perspective...

 

[hong]

The one main problem that I see with his portrayal is that, in trying to play "female", what he actually achieves is "genderless". There are no clues that one could pick up from the character's personality that indicate she's a woman; she's not a male character in a funny suit, either, she's just devoid of gender traits.

Note that you could turn that round and ask whether there's any clues that indicate she's a man. And either way, does it really matter?

 

[IdentityCrisis]

However, if you are going to do it, pick up some books with strong female characters. I really enjoy some of the female insight in the Wheel of Time books...

I read the first few of those, though it's been a long time. I have to admit I found the female characters to be extremely grating. While I admit that those women showed no shortage of courage and ability, I recall nearly every last one of them treating men as universally being childish, incompetant jerks. I like emotionally and intellectually strong women, but Robert Jordan seems to equate being a strong woman (or maybe just a woman period) with being a sexist bitch.

Not very inspiring to me.

In addition to all of the "don't be a slut" advice:

That was pretty much a given.

Discover what type of female you want to play and talk to women about your character's quirks and personality... I'm sure that all the ladies here on the boards, myself included, would love the chance to sit down and take a look at the backstory of a female character generated by one of the guys... would an interesting perspective...

I can't make much of a background until I can find out more about the Eberron setting, and getting the book right now is out of the question.

 

[Queen_Dopplepopolis]

I read the first few of those, though it's been a long time. I have to admit I found the female characters to be extremely grating. While I admit that those women showed no shortage of courage and ability, I recall nearly every last one of them treating men as universally being childish, incompetant jerks. I like emotionally and intellectually strong women, but Robert Jordan seems to equate being a strong woman (or maybe just a woman period) with being a sexist bitch.

Not very inspiring to me.

I can understand where you would get that vibe--but, you're supposed to get that particular vibe from a lot of the characters... however, a couple of characters really stand out as strong females that are quite well portrayed.

Additionally, anything by Weis... I also really like anything with Mara Jade of Star Wars fame... My husband just suggested Once a Hero by Stackpole and The Alvin Maker books...

 

[IdentityCrisis]

Just avoid over-stereotypicism (is that even a word? ).

Not every female is a vamp, not every male is a dumb musclebound barbarian,

Well, we *do* have a dumb, musclebound barbarian. Maybe the vamp stereotype would fit right in.

Just kidding.