There are these things called "acceptable social norms".
As a member of society, it is *your own* responsibility to keep up on acceptable social norms. That's right - the world is not responsible for giving people a comprehensive list of things that are okay to say, and things that are not. Society, instead, assumes that your brain functions, and that you will use it (and, for those with actual issues with their mental function, we give leeway). But, generally, failing to use your grey matter is your own fault, and you suffer the consequences.
Will there be the occasional misstep or edge case or misunderstanding? Yes. We cannot have a strict set of rules that actually cover all cases. Perfect justice is eternally denied us.
But, this is also a bit of a boogeyman. It isn't like men by the hordes are being caught up by edge cases, persecuted with minutae. They're getting caught up by the fact that they cannot get it into their heads that they might actually be held accountable, like an *equal*.
As noted elsewhere - for those who are used to being top dogs, being treated like equals *feels* like oppression. The folks who are asking for more protection from harassment aren't oppressing anyone. They are asking for a basic level of respect that they historically have not had. If "I must show respect for people" is too much for someone, or it seems arbitrary, dangerous, or burdensome to them, maybe they shouldn't be at a con in the first place.