How do you make a campaign world come to life?

[Reynard]

When preparing campaign material to be read by the players, I try and use a style taught to me in journalism classes: provide all the important information in the opening paragraph and add detail in subsequent paragraphs. But still keep the overall length short.

There's a tendency, especially among those of us that did/do get paid by the word to over write. In reality, concise is better because it leaves all kinds of space for expansion.

 

[Stormonu]

A revised opening introduction, is this any better?

[sblock]
I am Am’Al-a-Quna, the thirty-third scribe of his Imperial Majesty, Emperor August Macatheriel Hameru the twenty-third. As instructed by his lordship, I today set pen to parchment to record the state of the lands within and without the empire as they exist in this age, as of the year 1735 of the Imperial year, on the 13th day of the month of Skateros.


I shall, like my predecessors, begin my survey with the history of the Empire to the current age. Unfortunately for I and my predecessors, our knowledge of the world before the formation of the Crimson Empire is riddled with holes, which the enemies of our Lord all too gladly attempt to fill with lies and other falsehoods for their own agendas.


We do know, unfortunately, that the Empire once spanned an area far beyond the collection of huddled cities our empire has become. Though great are our cities raptor-riding defenders, the dinosaur-infested deserts between cities can only be safely traversed by the most cunning caravans. The open lands of Axathium across the sea are now a haven of pirates and corsairs, where once they were exotic ports of trade in the northern realm of Eth’Authurum. Likewise, the revitalized lands of the Kraken-worshipping blood casters of Norcast are no longer in our grasp. We still weep for the loss of far Savathuram, once a botanical wonder and now the blasted home to the hungry dead that seek to slake their thirst on our citizens. Our greatest woe is perhaps the loss of the great palace at Thyventhos, where many of the imperial linage were cut down in their prime. Thyventhos still stands amid a land teeming with dragons and passionate elementals, but it no longer answers to the empire at large.



Inhuman races stand ready, greedily casting their otherworldly eyes at the wealth of our cities. The anhiyawen, mere animals given a mockery of the human frame rule our ancient enemy of Durathast. The spirits of nature we call the fey have turned the natural world against us in the wooden race of the elves that stand vigilant against us in the Zapathos Forest at the opposite bounds of the empire. How can we forget our folly with the stony race of dwarves that we created and who then turned against us – taking the Grimjaw mountains for their own? And many would believe that the distant lands of the Tyres Haul – those dragons cast in Hameru’s blest form he gave to us – are too far to be trouble for us, but can we forget that the conquering Norcast came to us from afar either?


But I get ahead of myself. For at the dawn of the Empire, when such a thing was a new wonder to behold, these lands were wild and untamed. The empire sat in a fertile basin, a realm now known as the Blasted Wastes. The capital of that young empire was the golden city of Asul – great has been it fall!
[/sblock]

 

[weem]

I'm working on a new campaign world (haven't decided rule system, probably Savage Worlds), and I'm trying to think of a way to make it "come alive" in the write-up.

<snip>

Any advice or insight on what others find interesting when they sit down to read about a game world that "hooks them in" I would greatly appreciate.

(Emphasis is mine)

As has been mentioned, a DM really makes the world come alive (during play), but obviously you are not speaking to the aspect of the game that occurs AFTER players have decided to play - you are addressing the aspects of the setting that drew them to the game in the first place.

We can suggest a lot of things to consider for your intro/hook - don't fill it with historical data (that's boring), keep it short (we all tend to have short attention spans), etc, but I think it really comes down is this...

You want to create (with as few words as possible) an image in our minds that itself is worth a thousand words.

This is not something you can achieve based on feedback about what hooks us into campaigns. After all, as I mentioned above, what we like will be different than what you like, which is different than what the next person likes, and so on. In other words, you are trying to figure out the best bait to use to catch fish... and bears, and bees.

I think the more important focus should be developing a unique setting (as unique as can be that is) that connects to people on an emotional level. That image you are trying to create in our minds will be much more real and vivid if it evokes an emotional response of some kind.

For example, if your image evokes fear in my mind, it will be much clearer to me. My imagination will run with that on it's own.

On the other hand, if it's something mechanical like "in a world where Humans are the beasts, and Elves rule the land", you aren't going to get far. That's just information.

Another thing to consider is not to feel compelled to give us the zoomed out view of the world in the beginning. I don't need to know all the races your setting has and their relationships with each other, for example. That is impersonal data and you will lose me.

I need to be connected, so bring me in for the close up - let me get a view of the dirt I will be walking on.

Let me give you an example of this.

Last night I ran into a game called "Kentucky Route Zero" that is in the works for the PC. It's on kickstarter.com right now as they are trying to get money for further development. Here is their intro description...

"Kentucky Route Zero" is a magic realist adventure game about a secret highway in Kentucky and the mysterious folks who travel it. The player controls Conway, an antique furniture deliveryman, as he attempts to complete the final delivery for his financially troubled employer. Along the way he'll meet dozens of strange characters and make a few new friends to help him overcome the obstacles in his path.

This had me interested right away. It was a very unique idea, and if I wasn't 100% hooked by that paragraph, the next one sealed it...

Gameplay in Kentucky Route Zero is slow-paced, focusing on exploring new environments and talking with new people. In one section, Conway meets a robotic country singer named Junebug who is trapped in the abandoned restaurant that once employed her, and has to explore the cavernous depths below the restaurant in order to shut down a security system and free her. In another, Conway and his companions explore a Civil War era battleship that ran ashore in an underground river hundreds of years ago and is now populated entirely by cats.

This description evokes the feeling of mystery and awe, and even a little fear with the aid of the music they have for the game. I immediately imagined running a game in this setting and I didn't really know much about it! I don't really care to play the actual PC game itself, but setting sucked me right in.

Anyway, those are just some quick thoughts on the topic - I am by no means an expert on it. My setting is popular with my players - I tried to start my 3rd campaign in a different setting (than the one I created) and they almost threw a fit - but I don't expect anyone outside of that group to be excited about it.

Good luck with your setting!

 

[Barastrondo]

A revised opening introduction, is this any better?

It brings a lot more immediacy to the opening, yes. When I skim it with my "player eye", I get a general idea of major threat groups in various locales outside the Empire. It does stress that everything interesting is happening outside the Empire, mind; that would tend to imply that PCs will want to spend little time in the Empire itself, and therefore you might want to be careful about the amount of word count you expend describing life within the Empire that is not itself dripping with plot hooks that imply intrigues, skirmishes and other adventures that might take place there.

Also, I hope you'll take this criticism in good spirits, because really it's an utterly subjective matter, but be sure to get a second eye on some of the made-up fantasyese names. For example, I see the "Zapathos" forest and I immediately think of "Zapatos" -- not everyone is necessarily going to think "oh hey, shoes!", but some will. Similarly, although you may be able to immediately visualize the pronunciation of, say, "anhiyawen," a lot of readers will have to stop dead-center in the middle of the sentence and go over that word a couple of times. It will break the reading flow until it becomes second nature, and for some readers it may never become second-nature. Making up your own terminology is very tempting, but it can be a bar to players feeling at home in a setting if you don't use it carefully.

When you're dealing in made-up words that bear no relation to obvious real-world terms, it's often a good idea to have alternate terms you can use for them. It's something I often had to do with Werewolf: even though "Garou" was pretty easy to remember (especially as it came from "loup-garou"), I encouraged writers to alternate between "Garou" and "werewolves" and sometimes "the People" to keep from seeing too much repetition in a given paragraph. This'll help the flow, and also help players come to grips with what the words mean: if you alternate "anhiyawen" with "animal-men" and "beastfolk" in a paragraph talking about them, it'll be a useful reminder as well as cutting down on repetitious language. Ultimately it also give the players a good choice, as well: do they prefer to use the clearest English definition of a race, or do they adopt the terminology? That's what happened with us: some people preferred "Garou," some "werewolves." (Although it probably helped that "Garou" is actually quicker to type...)

 

[Scorponox]

I've only DM'ed (and currently only DMing) one campaign, but my world has come alive. I'm not a veteran DM by any means but in my opinion, it's about conflict, conflict, conflict! That is the first reason players adventure. Everything else revolves around that.

Give them a problem first, whether it be marauding bandits, an earthquake that has left a city in ruins, or a young dragon which has come into the area to establish her lair. And the story, settings, personalities, and factions all change and center around the conflict.

If it's marauding bandits, then goal is to see them driven off. If it's the earthquake, maybe it's to help the people find food and fight off looters. If it's a young dragon, then the endgame is to see it killed or scared away.

Think of every sci fi or fantasy TV show which is considered good. I like to use Battlestar Galactica (the new one) and Deep Space Nine as examples. In BSG, it starts with the Cylon attack on the 12 colonies, and immediately, they are on the run. How the various people deal with it, and the different personalities in conflict with each other is what drove good drama.

In DS9, it was about the Federation helping Bajor get back on it's feet after the Cardassians stripped them of their resources and occupied their planet for decades.

In BSG, the endgame was to either find earth, or die trying, and it took them 4 seasons to finally resolve that issue.

In DS9, then endgame was to see Bajor join the Federation.

Both end results were not apparent until a little later into the series, and in your games, if you set it up correctly, you will not have to tell your players "you have to do this" but it will be apparent that they will have to do something to solve the conflict once and for all.

All the stuff you have written down is great stuff, but I think MOST people will not want to read all that text. Give them a simple hook, just maybe 2-3 paragraphs, and in it, a conflict, and some short, medium, and long range goals. That establishes a good, working skeleton. The rest of it, like cultures, people, history, is all meat and bones. But it will fall limp without a good reason why they are adventuring.

 

[Stormonu]

Another stab at an opening, more focused on the empire - but still too long-winded, I fear.

[sblock]
Eth’Aurthurum – the Eternal empire - . It is also known as the Crimson empire, so named for the blood spilled by its own people – or the blood of its enemies it has spilled - to keep it standing.



Once a fertile, growing kingdom ruled by a god-emperor known as Hameru, it has been reduced to a handful of walled cities amid a vast desert filled with dangerous reptiles known and feared as dinosaurs. [FONT=&quot]Only the bravest or foolish of caravans dare tarry outside the city walls.[/FONT]


Within the walled fortress-cities of the empire the descendants of the great children of Hameru have formed powerful lineages that control their citizens with an iron rule. Ancient laws that were erected to serve and save the people have become a yoke about their neck, enslaving the populace in duties inherited to them from their forefathers. All of humanity knows their place in the great castes erected long ago by Hameru himself.


Yet, rulership cannot be doled out to all the descendants of these great families, and it is from these legendary bloodlines that arise dilettantes, heroes and villains – and you. Prepare to tread the desert sands of the empire and beyond in your quest for treasure, power, trade and allies. What blood will you spill for the continuation of the empire – or for yourself?
[/sblock]

 

[InVinoVeritas]

I'm beginning to get a sense of the land, and that's great. By the way, don't be afraid to combine genres. Right now, I'm developing a Spice Route style world, based off the trade and adventures throughout the Indian Ocean and beyond. Think Sinbad, the 1001 Nights, decayed remains of a Macedonian-style kobold-and-dragon empire, the Ramayana, Tibetan-style dwarves, an elven Celestial Bureaucracy, an orcish Golden Horde, adventuring in the ruins of places looking like the Shwedagon Pagoda and Angkor Wat, mysterious uncharted Spice Islands extending outward to Polynesian-style empire, and just arriving are Portuguese-style goblin conquistadors. By all means, mix genres.

Back to the Crimson Empire (stick with that name, people don't want to trip over Eth'Authurum):

So now, I'm thinking "dinosaur-infested scrubland". I could make a velociraptor rider, that's cool. But I'm still not entirely sure what's happening. Arabic feel, with dinosaurs? I still feel we need more hooks, more oomph.

Starting with the Arabic dinosaur desert idea, we could include elite pteranodon-riding (or roc-riding?) units, caravans filled with apatosauruses instead of camels, wild men on styracosauruses... this is a start. But how would you look to include the Arabic feel? Or is it necessary and we go down the dinosaur path.

What's a rogue to do here? A wizard? A cleric?

 

[Stormonu]

But I'm still not entirely sure what's happening. Arabic feel, with dinosaurs? I still feel we need more hooks, more oomph.

Yeah, that's a big problem, I've got the "where", but nothing yet on "what do we do now we're here?"

But how would you look to include the Arabic feel? Or is it necessary and we go down the dinosaur path.

I'm going for arabic-style names, dress and a custom here or there. Possibly some of the split between the nomadic desert tribes and the city-dwelling people. I don't want to bog it down too much in real-world araby, though; just some trappings akin to how D&D has the trappings of european names and styles, but isn't Europe.

What's a rogue to do here? A wizard? A cleric?

Rogues would fit into the "royal" lineages perhaps as spies, assassins. Among the common folk probably as a street urchin; with the sort of Lawful evil celestial bureaucracy I'm contemplating an outright thief or robber in a city could expect a short, harsh life. Inside the city, rogues might spy on rival houses, engage in covert wars (by political, economic or outright violence) against another house or commoner's work gang, deal as a fence for contraband or rare articles or even plumb the ancient works beneath century-old cities for treasure or trouble.

Outside of the city, brigands, pirates and "free thinker" rogues would be the norm. There are ancient ruins to plunder, caravans to sack, new trade routes to be opened and even caravans to be taxed, watered or resupplied for those daring enough to try.

As I am seeing them in the empire, wizards are prized among the aristocracy, often their magic is used to keep the families in power (think mentats from Dune) or even keep the city from becoming desert-like. One special thing is that the children of wizard/wizard unions create a special innately sorcerous human known as a "mageborn" - who would be akin to the "bluebloods" of the aristrocracy and are often spoiled on power and attention. Unlike most other D&Dsque worlds, wizards can use healing magic. Wizards might direct households against each other in political and/or economic matters, undergo trials to prove loyalty or worth or even travel to establish trade with other cities and siblings in far away lands. Rogue wizards (cast out for some failure) might seek mercenary work with a caravan or start his own. Some might even join in plundering the ancient works beneath their cities to regain power or seek revenge against the household that cast them out.

As for clerics/priests/druids, they're generally either considered touched in the head or plain mad. The common populace revere household spirits and ancestors and there is "something wrong" with someone who is seen as the mouthpiece of a very powerful spirit; they are tools to attract converts, avenge wrongs or otherwise proclaim the doom of sinners. They are the antipaladins of the world; only the most fanatical would want to be around them, I'm expecting to use them primarily as adversaries. With reincarnation being the norm belief it also means that when a priest brings someone back from the dead it's something to worry about; something powerful has decided to interfere in the natural order of things and has a purpose for bringing said individual back (which basically means, resurrection is extremely rare).

 

[InVinoVeritas]

Yeah, that's a big problem, I've got the "where", but nothing yet on "what do we do now we're here?"

THAT's the crux of the problem. "Where" is virtually unimportant. "What am I doing" is the only thing that matters.

So let's just forget about history, about quasi-Arab trappings, even about dinosaurs for a moment. What are we going to do?

spies, assassins.
street urchin
Lawful evil celestial bureaucracy
spy on rival houses, engage in covert wars (by political, economic or outright violence) against another house or commoner's work gang, deal as a fence for contraband or rare articles or even plumb the ancient works beneath century-old cities for treasure or trouble.
brigands, pirates and "free thinker" rogues
ancient ruins to plunder, caravans to sack, new trade routes to be opened and even caravans to be taxed, watered or resupplied for those daring enough to try.

magic is used to keep the families in power (think mentats from Dune) or even keep the city from becoming desert-like.
special innately sorcerous human known as a "mageborn" - who would be akin to the "bluebloods" of the aristrocracy and are often spoiled on power and attention.
wizards can use healing magic
direct households against each other in political and/or economic matters, undergo trials to prove loyalty or worth or even travel to establish trade with other cities and siblings in far away lands.
mercenary work with a caravan or start his own
plundering the ancient works beneath their cities
seek revenge against the household that cast them out.

"something wrong" with someone who is seen as the mouthpiece of a very powerful spirit; they are tools to attract converts, avenge wrongs or otherwise proclaim the doom of sinners.
antipaladins of the world;
reincarnation being the norm
when a priest brings someone back from the dead it's something to worry about; something powerful has decided to interfere in the natural order of things and has a purpose for bringing said individual back

Passage stripped to the DOs. Much of it is already done in other games, but the removal of clerics from regular life and giving the role to wizards is an important change. So now I see a possible job as an arcane inquisitor (riding a velociraptor and wielding a falchion) tracking down rogue cultists (in the shifting sands). Now I see shady assassins used as pawns between warring mage houses. What would that be like? If I, as a wizard, make an enemy of another wizard, how do we fight? Big bombastic spell volleys? Shadowy manipulation of events? What protections would I put up, to make sure that the enemy wizard doesn't do me in somehow? If I'm nonmagical, can I compete in this world? Will a wizard house have a use for me or just summon demons or djinn to take care of things instead? (Djinn. Summon lots of djinn.)

Work on that. Work on that first. When you've got that feel down, then the history and the maps and the names and everything can come afterward. Because that's where the feel of the world is going to live, in the here and now, in the flow of activity, in what we do.

 

[steeldragons]

From a brief skim of the thread, you are talking a bit "larger scale" I think than I'm thinking.

That said, perhaps some direction/ideas might bloom from a perusal of this thread: http://www.enworld.org/forum/general-rpg-discussion/298194-its-little-things.html

Several good tidbits in there (even one or two are mine!).

Good luck and happy world building.
-Steel Dragons