D&D 5E I quit a game. Am I in the wrong? (spoiler, I don't believe so)

[R_J_K75]

Absolutely!

What's the point of 'making sense' or whatever if there's no one for it to make sense to?

Seems as if the DM was more interested in their super awesome cool genius campaign story than making sure everyone at the table is having fun.

 

[Neonchameleon]

So, with all of that information (and yes, we talked about it before, MANY times, so it wasn't a lack of communication) do you believe I am in the wrong?

No gaming is better than bad gaming. If the group is rubbing you the wrong way then leaving is not the wrong choice. And on your presentation of the issues (which is likely to favour you admittedly) you seem to have behaved entirely reasonably - but even if you were completely in the wrong you wouldn't have been wrong to quite the game.

 

[EzekielRaiden]

As a DM I wouldn't even bother with any explanation, here's your PC back, where was he, who cares, let's play.

For my part, while I make no excuses for this DM's alleged bad handling of the situation, I usually prefer to do something here.

Mostly because I find this a great opportunity to do something with that absence. Sometimes, there's nothing one can do. But other times it can be great fun spending 20-30 minutes finding out why the party Druid was off on his own for a day.

 

[Mort]

So, with all of that information (and yes, we talked about it before, MANY times, so it wasn't a lack of communication) do you believe I am in the wrong?

It doesn't matter.

If you weren't having fun, and don't expect to have any fun going forward. then step away and be done with it. Nothing wrong with exiting a game.

No point in trying to figure out "who was in the right...." that's just mental torture.

 

[Vaalingrade]

For my part, while I make no excuses for this DM's alleged bad handling of the situation, I usually prefer to do something here.

Mostly because I find this a great opportunity to do something with that absence. Sometimes, there's nothing one can do. But other times it can be great fun spending 20-30 minutes finding out why the party Druid was off on his own for a day.

I don't know, man. That's 25% of our weekly game spent coming up for justification for something that's not actually diegetic. The druid wasn't actually not there, the player just couldn't play them and it would be unfair to screw with the character of a player who isn't there.

 

[AnotherGuy]

I don't know, man. That's 25% of our weekly game spent coming up for justification for something that's not actually diegetic. The druid wasn't actually not there, the player just couldn't play them and it would be unfair to screw with the character of a player who isn't there.

That's a preference though. Some tables don't play the character pop-in, pop-out rpg experience. Seems like this table did not play that too.

 

[Vaalingrade]

This table ain't playing much of anything anymore because of it too.

 

[jaelis]

This thread makes me think we need a dnd AITA forum

 

[FitzTheRuke]

I don't know, man. That's 25% of our weekly game spent coming up for justification for something that's not actually diegetic. The druid wasn't actually not there, the player just couldn't play them and it would be unfair to screw with the character of a player who isn't there.

That's one of the best ways, IMO, to deal with characters whose player is absent: Mention them in passing now and then, to remind everyone that they are, in fact, there, but don't have anything at all happen to them. Then when the player is back, just start fully interacting with them again.

 

[pukunui]

By the way, I care a bit, because of the one character I spent a bunch of time playing and having fun with. But it was time to leave that toxic game, especially with how they acted after I left and continually shifted blame at me and absolved themselves.

Perhaps you can find a new group that will allow you to bring in a version of this character (perhaps with some tweaks to fit their campaign) so you can keep playing it.

Also, you are not in the wrong for quitting, and I suggest just not engaging with the DM any more. It’s really not worth arguing with him about why you left – unless you want to maintain your relationship and/or have the option of rejoining his group in the future (but it sounds like maybe you don’t).