Emperor Valerian
First Post
In the following section, the party just got silly. Sometimes its better that way.
Sandhogs, Confusion, and Why Lucius Pouted One Night
Later that night, the party made camp on the low side of a ridge. Much relieved that the danger from the ring had passed and their quarrels had been settled, the party was in the mood for a small dose of merriment.
As Siabrey took a seat beside Lucius near the campfire with her meal, a distant idea popped into her head; she’d seen Shaun pranking Elenya often, and as she saw him spout off another tall tale to her (which resulted in punchings, and later rough-housing in the sand) she got an idea herself...
“Hey Lucius? Hon?” she sidled up to him, “I’ve come to a decision on something.” She made sure her voice was singsong, and watched as he jumped to facing her expectantly. She leaned close, but didn’t let her lips touch.
“Um, what is it?” he asked, a grin spreading over his face. He’s assuming he knows what it is... he’s in for a surprise! her mind laughed. Of course, after we’ve had a laugh at it... I really wouldn’t mind...
”You know, Luke,” she said, her voice changing to matter-of-fact tone, “when your emotions get pumping, thats when the bad magic tended to happen, right?”
“Um... yeah,” Lucius said warily, unsure of where she was going. Siabrey tried hard not to let a giggle sneak through, and managed to stifle her urge to laugh.
“Well, I was thinking, that in order to protect you, we should no longer engage in any... um... escapades?” a small smile broke through despite her efforts, and it took an internal kick to get it to slip away.
“What... what do you mean?” Lucius asked quietly, his eyes growing wider in fear.
“Well, we shouldn’t be, um... trying new spells anymore, at least until this mess with your mother is settled,” Siabrey twisted the knot of her joke further. “No more. We can’t have your emotions getting out of hand in the middle of activity, no can we?”
Despite the fact that a small giggle did finally escape from her lips, Lucius apparently didn’t catch the joke. His lower lip trembled, and finally broke free and his face took on a pout.
“Ok,” he said huffily, “Fine. I can accept that.” For a second, she thought she saw a tear in his eye.
Despite the fact she lost all urge to laugh seeing him upset, she forced herself to... at the very least, to try to get him to see the humor and stop pouting.
“Luke, c’mon!” she giggled, “it was a joke!” Her giggles died away when he folded his own arms, and was now in full pout.
“It was a very very mean joke!” he said, turning away from her.
Aww... I hurt his feelings!
”Luke... Luke, c’mon,” she said, not laughing any longer. She touched a hand on his shoulder, kneading it slowly. “Don’t be mad... please?” His head didn’t turn, and she decided to pull out her last resort. She trailed a finger along the side of his face, and whispered into his ear, “I’ll make it up to you.... I promise... when no one else is around...”
He turned around, and instead of a pout was an enormous smile that broke into a laugh... and Siabrey realized it was she that had been getting pranked.
“You... augh!” she slugged him in the shoulder, and he laughed, squirming. “I was worried!” I thought you were genuinely mad at me...
“You should have been,” Shaun said from across the campfire, “nothing scares a man more than being told he’s getting put on rations.” Everyone shared a laugh at the comment.
“That comment was worthy of Grumki,” Tess said finally after she recovered from laughter.
Several hours later, the party slumbered away through the night, as Siabrey manned the second watch, while Shaun lightly dozed. She looked at him, gave a sigh, and tossed some bits of dried wood into the fire. The flames cast an orange glow, which lit up the face of Elenya, who was snuggling her erstwhile watch-mate’s pillow. Further away, the light licking her sleeping face was Tess, snoring softly with her harp nestled by her side. Then off to the left, she saw a pile of blankets that until a half hour before had held two, and the soft firelight danced on Lucius’ sleeping face as he had wrapped his arm around a pillow that was now in Siabrey’s stead.
Siabrey Sipner... you did a good job, her mind finally allowed itself to say. You protected all of them... all your charges are here... safe.
But we haven’t left the desert yet, another part added quietly. They’ve survived a Temple to Demons, and Rogar himself... keep an eye on them, and you’ll soon be in Irulas...
Her mind slowly started drifting back to the warm, deep beds in their former rooms... and the food, the gala, the bathhouse....
Her pleasant dream was interrupted by a noise. Her mind initially wasn’t sure what it was, but some instinct in her head shouted it was dangerous. She was instantly up from the log where she had been sitting at, and she heard it again...
Snorting... like hogs.
Sandhogs, her mind realized quietly as she spotted two shapes off in the distance, carefully edging their way closer. Carefully she pulled out her bow, and edged over toward Shaun’s light snores.
“Shaun!” she hissed, and the rogue shook and rapidly jumped up.
“Huh! What? What... what is it?”
“Over there... rose the party. Two sandhogs.” Siabrey drew back her bow as other party members quietly arose. The snorts became louder, as Siabrey recited one of the things her mother repeated to her constantly in the days before she was allowed to leave.
A sandhog’s weakness lies around its neck and shoulder... the thick skin and strong hairs form a natural glancing armor, but here the skin is thinner, the hairs smaller. An arrow here can cripple or kill it before it has a chance to...
She loosed her arrow, and for a second she thought it had flown true. To her chagrin, it didn’t hit at hte junction between the next and the shoulder, where it could have easy drove straight into the creature’s heart from this angle, but deep into its shoulder. The sandhog bellowed, and charged.
His mate, hearing his growl, then launched one of the sandhog’s most infamous attacks, and a searing ray of heat lashed at Siabrey. It forced her to drop her bow... which ironically she didn’t mind, as Kelir was well gifted in the art of sandhog slaying.
Ah... a grunting one, her sword told her in her head, It keeps my hilt warm... maybe you can add another layer, this one properly tanned, to increase my hilts... beauty? Siabrey didn’t notice the phrase as her mind locked into combat mode.
Tess was the first of the party to respond, and with her voice lashed out three sonic darts at the sandhog that had held back to burn Siabrey. All three hit with massive power, and the entire sandhogs body exploded, the sonic energy intense enough that its meat was cooked to the point of being edible.
The creature at Siabrey’s front snarled, and with one of its four heads it tried to rip her leg off. It managed to grab and sink its vile teeth in, but a swift kick from her threw it off of her. Her adrenaline was pumping so fast that the poison it tried to inject in her veins did not faze her, and as the creature flew off of her leg, she lazily spung Kelir in the air, slicing its throat open. Before she could come in with the killing strike, Grumki’s warhammer shattered the creature’s skull.
The smell of cooked ribs wafted over the desert, and instead of getting her bite checked out, Siabrey wandered over towards the still sizzling remains of the further sandhog. She also remembered another item her mother, who fought them frequently before meeting her father, had told her...
The sandhog’s poison glands are to the front, just behind the head. As long as you leave the head alone, the body is edible. The ribs are delicious... and after cooking tend to keep for several weeks.
She’d never had a chance to try some herself (during her mercenary days when she ridded a village of the creature bothering it she was usually too busy being dragged to the tavern for celebratory rounds of drinks), and she was determined to give it a shot. As the others marveled over the crushed head of hte first creature, she ripped off a large section of rib, and tasted the meat... and found it tender, succulent, and delicious. She immediately started tearing off more, and breaking them into pieces that could fit in her travel pack. Of course, a few pieces found their way to her mouth as well.
She was about a quarter done with the cleaning the sandhog when a panicked voice shouted, “WHAT ARE YOU DOING?!” A hand reached out and grabbed the section of rib in her hand. She looked up, a little annoyed, to see Lucius’ panicked face.
“It’s owkay hon,” she spoke around the piece in her mouth, “I naw where da poisin bland ith.”
“If its poisonous, you should eat it at all, love!” Lucius cried, his voice even more panicky. He slapped her on the back, but instead of getting the meat out of her mouth, he merely annoyed her.
“Da poisin glanths arenth near tha ribth, hon,” she said, letting a little annoyance in her voice. “Mah mutha ath them all tha thime.” She took the rib back, and started pulling off more pieces. As fast as she put them in, Lucius was taking them back out.
“Fine... fine,” she said, after swallowing the delicious piece in her mouth, “I won’t eat any.” Quietly she crossed her fingers behind her, and a few minutes after he and the others began gently snoring, she packed the rib meat from the rest of the cooked hog, and buried the animal under the sands.
I’m set for WEEKS on rations! her mind giggled when she returned to by the fire only minutes before Grumki and Tess awoke to take final watch. As she slid in beside Lucius under the blankets, she felt him stir.
“You smell like cooked pork still,” he said without opening his eyes.
“Smells delicious doesn’t it?” she said quietly with a smile he couldn’t see before giving him a goodnight kiss. “Go back to sleep.”
She resolved that she wouldn’t eat any of the ribs while he was looking... but would feast when he wasn’t, and possibly slip one into his rations to convince him it wasn’t poisonous.
Her urge to be ornery over came that.
Midday the next day, as the party continued to ride along slowly, Siabrey impishly decided to ride alongside Luke. As she drew near, she threw him a raised eyebrow, and a devilish grin. He smiled in return.
“What’s running through your head, hon?” he said quietly, his eyes perfectly showing what his young brain thought it was.
“Oh nothing...” she said, reaching into her pack, and pulling out one of the ribs. “Just thinking about how good my sandhog ribs are!”
Before he could respond, she’d spurred her horse ahead, waving the rib just out of his reach. He charged after, though her smaller and faster horse easily dodged around his larger charger. Finally he nabbed the piece she held in front of him, and she drew out two more. Once she was far enough ahead, she jumped off of her horse, and ran on foot... Lucius jumped off his as well, the chase now changed from a one of sanitation to one of merriment.
“I’ve got you!” Luke finally shouted as he managed to catch her and pull her to the ground. The two immediately began rough-housing over the soft clay and sand.
“They’re just like bunnies,” Tess growled as she rode by the two now disheveled revelers, still wrestling over the piece of meat. “Day in, day out... don’t you ever get bored?”
Pellaron rode up alongside as well, joining in the tsking. “I would hate to do that... the sand would get in the joints of my armor!”
“He’s not wearing armor!” Siabrey shouted derisively, “When you’re about to engage in...”
“OK! I’m moving this way,” Tess shouted over the rest of Siabrey’s answer, and spurred her horse ahead. Pellaron followed... partially to get away from Siabrey’s lewd comment, but also to stay close to Tess...
The two engaged in mutual tsking for a while, slowing down at a distance to wait for the two lovebirds. A few minutes after they had rode by, they watched as the two, their rambuctiousness evidentally spent, get back on their horses and start trotting forward.
“I swear... they’re like children!” Tess said with exasperation, “I have to keep them focused from their toys and on things at hand!”
“Indeed, they are,” Pellaron said, adding in a slightly more quiet voice, “and your lovely voice is the perfect one to correct them.” He saw Tess’ face go confused, and her horse slid a little ahead of his. He kicked himself for even blurting it out.
Siabrey’s right... he is indeed attracted to me, Tess sighed finally. I’m going to have to have a talk with him... it’ll take some word phrasing... for all his skill with a sword, our paladin is a softie. Don’t want to hurt his feelings when I tell him unequivocably... no.
Within the moment, Siabrey, with a sly looking smile, was beside the two. From her smirk, it was clear she heard his comment as well, and both Tess and Pellaron kicked themselves for riding this close even.
“So... Tess? Our paladin friend here has the Sune book, if you are interested!” she said slowly, with mocking seductiveness in her voice. Tess swung a foot out to kick her, but missed, while Pellaron’s face went a deep crimson. Indeed he had the book... he’d never read it since Siabrey had foisted it on him.
“She’s just like an annoying little sister!” Tess said, annoyed.
Sandhogs, Confusion, and Why Lucius Pouted One Night
Later that night, the party made camp on the low side of a ridge. Much relieved that the danger from the ring had passed and their quarrels had been settled, the party was in the mood for a small dose of merriment.
As Siabrey took a seat beside Lucius near the campfire with her meal, a distant idea popped into her head; she’d seen Shaun pranking Elenya often, and as she saw him spout off another tall tale to her (which resulted in punchings, and later rough-housing in the sand) she got an idea herself...
“Hey Lucius? Hon?” she sidled up to him, “I’ve come to a decision on something.” She made sure her voice was singsong, and watched as he jumped to facing her expectantly. She leaned close, but didn’t let her lips touch.
“Um, what is it?” he asked, a grin spreading over his face. He’s assuming he knows what it is... he’s in for a surprise! her mind laughed. Of course, after we’ve had a laugh at it... I really wouldn’t mind...
”You know, Luke,” she said, her voice changing to matter-of-fact tone, “when your emotions get pumping, thats when the bad magic tended to happen, right?”
“Um... yeah,” Lucius said warily, unsure of where she was going. Siabrey tried hard not to let a giggle sneak through, and managed to stifle her urge to laugh.
“Well, I was thinking, that in order to protect you, we should no longer engage in any... um... escapades?” a small smile broke through despite her efforts, and it took an internal kick to get it to slip away.
“What... what do you mean?” Lucius asked quietly, his eyes growing wider in fear.
“Well, we shouldn’t be, um... trying new spells anymore, at least until this mess with your mother is settled,” Siabrey twisted the knot of her joke further. “No more. We can’t have your emotions getting out of hand in the middle of activity, no can we?”
Despite the fact that a small giggle did finally escape from her lips, Lucius apparently didn’t catch the joke. His lower lip trembled, and finally broke free and his face took on a pout.
“Ok,” he said huffily, “Fine. I can accept that.” For a second, she thought she saw a tear in his eye.
Despite the fact she lost all urge to laugh seeing him upset, she forced herself to... at the very least, to try to get him to see the humor and stop pouting.
“Luke, c’mon!” she giggled, “it was a joke!” Her giggles died away when he folded his own arms, and was now in full pout.
“It was a very very mean joke!” he said, turning away from her.
Aww... I hurt his feelings!
”Luke... Luke, c’mon,” she said, not laughing any longer. She touched a hand on his shoulder, kneading it slowly. “Don’t be mad... please?” His head didn’t turn, and she decided to pull out her last resort. She trailed a finger along the side of his face, and whispered into his ear, “I’ll make it up to you.... I promise... when no one else is around...”
He turned around, and instead of a pout was an enormous smile that broke into a laugh... and Siabrey realized it was she that had been getting pranked.
“You... augh!” she slugged him in the shoulder, and he laughed, squirming. “I was worried!” I thought you were genuinely mad at me...
“You should have been,” Shaun said from across the campfire, “nothing scares a man more than being told he’s getting put on rations.” Everyone shared a laugh at the comment.
“That comment was worthy of Grumki,” Tess said finally after she recovered from laughter.
Several hours later, the party slumbered away through the night, as Siabrey manned the second watch, while Shaun lightly dozed. She looked at him, gave a sigh, and tossed some bits of dried wood into the fire. The flames cast an orange glow, which lit up the face of Elenya, who was snuggling her erstwhile watch-mate’s pillow. Further away, the light licking her sleeping face was Tess, snoring softly with her harp nestled by her side. Then off to the left, she saw a pile of blankets that until a half hour before had held two, and the soft firelight danced on Lucius’ sleeping face as he had wrapped his arm around a pillow that was now in Siabrey’s stead.
Siabrey Sipner... you did a good job, her mind finally allowed itself to say. You protected all of them... all your charges are here... safe.
But we haven’t left the desert yet, another part added quietly. They’ve survived a Temple to Demons, and Rogar himself... keep an eye on them, and you’ll soon be in Irulas...
Her mind slowly started drifting back to the warm, deep beds in their former rooms... and the food, the gala, the bathhouse....
Her pleasant dream was interrupted by a noise. Her mind initially wasn’t sure what it was, but some instinct in her head shouted it was dangerous. She was instantly up from the log where she had been sitting at, and she heard it again...
Snorting... like hogs.
Sandhogs, her mind realized quietly as she spotted two shapes off in the distance, carefully edging their way closer. Carefully she pulled out her bow, and edged over toward Shaun’s light snores.
“Shaun!” she hissed, and the rogue shook and rapidly jumped up.
“Huh! What? What... what is it?”
“Over there... rose the party. Two sandhogs.” Siabrey drew back her bow as other party members quietly arose. The snorts became louder, as Siabrey recited one of the things her mother repeated to her constantly in the days before she was allowed to leave.
A sandhog’s weakness lies around its neck and shoulder... the thick skin and strong hairs form a natural glancing armor, but here the skin is thinner, the hairs smaller. An arrow here can cripple or kill it before it has a chance to...
She loosed her arrow, and for a second she thought it had flown true. To her chagrin, it didn’t hit at hte junction between the next and the shoulder, where it could have easy drove straight into the creature’s heart from this angle, but deep into its shoulder. The sandhog bellowed, and charged.
His mate, hearing his growl, then launched one of the sandhog’s most infamous attacks, and a searing ray of heat lashed at Siabrey. It forced her to drop her bow... which ironically she didn’t mind, as Kelir was well gifted in the art of sandhog slaying.
Ah... a grunting one, her sword told her in her head, It keeps my hilt warm... maybe you can add another layer, this one properly tanned, to increase my hilts... beauty? Siabrey didn’t notice the phrase as her mind locked into combat mode.
Tess was the first of the party to respond, and with her voice lashed out three sonic darts at the sandhog that had held back to burn Siabrey. All three hit with massive power, and the entire sandhogs body exploded, the sonic energy intense enough that its meat was cooked to the point of being edible.
The creature at Siabrey’s front snarled, and with one of its four heads it tried to rip her leg off. It managed to grab and sink its vile teeth in, but a swift kick from her threw it off of her. Her adrenaline was pumping so fast that the poison it tried to inject in her veins did not faze her, and as the creature flew off of her leg, she lazily spung Kelir in the air, slicing its throat open. Before she could come in with the killing strike, Grumki’s warhammer shattered the creature’s skull.
The smell of cooked ribs wafted over the desert, and instead of getting her bite checked out, Siabrey wandered over towards the still sizzling remains of the further sandhog. She also remembered another item her mother, who fought them frequently before meeting her father, had told her...
The sandhog’s poison glands are to the front, just behind the head. As long as you leave the head alone, the body is edible. The ribs are delicious... and after cooking tend to keep for several weeks.
She’d never had a chance to try some herself (during her mercenary days when she ridded a village of the creature bothering it she was usually too busy being dragged to the tavern for celebratory rounds of drinks), and she was determined to give it a shot. As the others marveled over the crushed head of hte first creature, she ripped off a large section of rib, and tasted the meat... and found it tender, succulent, and delicious. She immediately started tearing off more, and breaking them into pieces that could fit in her travel pack. Of course, a few pieces found their way to her mouth as well.
She was about a quarter done with the cleaning the sandhog when a panicked voice shouted, “WHAT ARE YOU DOING?!” A hand reached out and grabbed the section of rib in her hand. She looked up, a little annoyed, to see Lucius’ panicked face.
“It’s owkay hon,” she spoke around the piece in her mouth, “I naw where da poisin bland ith.”
“If its poisonous, you should eat it at all, love!” Lucius cried, his voice even more panicky. He slapped her on the back, but instead of getting the meat out of her mouth, he merely annoyed her.
“Da poisin glanths arenth near tha ribth, hon,” she said, letting a little annoyance in her voice. “Mah mutha ath them all tha thime.” She took the rib back, and started pulling off more pieces. As fast as she put them in, Lucius was taking them back out.
“Fine... fine,” she said, after swallowing the delicious piece in her mouth, “I won’t eat any.” Quietly she crossed her fingers behind her, and a few minutes after he and the others began gently snoring, she packed the rib meat from the rest of the cooked hog, and buried the animal under the sands.
I’m set for WEEKS on rations! her mind giggled when she returned to by the fire only minutes before Grumki and Tess awoke to take final watch. As she slid in beside Lucius under the blankets, she felt him stir.
“You smell like cooked pork still,” he said without opening his eyes.
“Smells delicious doesn’t it?” she said quietly with a smile he couldn’t see before giving him a goodnight kiss. “Go back to sleep.”
She resolved that she wouldn’t eat any of the ribs while he was looking... but would feast when he wasn’t, and possibly slip one into his rations to convince him it wasn’t poisonous.
Her urge to be ornery over came that.
Midday the next day, as the party continued to ride along slowly, Siabrey impishly decided to ride alongside Luke. As she drew near, she threw him a raised eyebrow, and a devilish grin. He smiled in return.
“What’s running through your head, hon?” he said quietly, his eyes perfectly showing what his young brain thought it was.
“Oh nothing...” she said, reaching into her pack, and pulling out one of the ribs. “Just thinking about how good my sandhog ribs are!”
Before he could respond, she’d spurred her horse ahead, waving the rib just out of his reach. He charged after, though her smaller and faster horse easily dodged around his larger charger. Finally he nabbed the piece she held in front of him, and she drew out two more. Once she was far enough ahead, she jumped off of her horse, and ran on foot... Lucius jumped off his as well, the chase now changed from a one of sanitation to one of merriment.
“I’ve got you!” Luke finally shouted as he managed to catch her and pull her to the ground. The two immediately began rough-housing over the soft clay and sand.
“They’re just like bunnies,” Tess growled as she rode by the two now disheveled revelers, still wrestling over the piece of meat. “Day in, day out... don’t you ever get bored?”
Pellaron rode up alongside as well, joining in the tsking. “I would hate to do that... the sand would get in the joints of my armor!”
“He’s not wearing armor!” Siabrey shouted derisively, “When you’re about to engage in...”
“OK! I’m moving this way,” Tess shouted over the rest of Siabrey’s answer, and spurred her horse ahead. Pellaron followed... partially to get away from Siabrey’s lewd comment, but also to stay close to Tess...
The two engaged in mutual tsking for a while, slowing down at a distance to wait for the two lovebirds. A few minutes after they had rode by, they watched as the two, their rambuctiousness evidentally spent, get back on their horses and start trotting forward.
“I swear... they’re like children!” Tess said with exasperation, “I have to keep them focused from their toys and on things at hand!”
“Indeed, they are,” Pellaron said, adding in a slightly more quiet voice, “and your lovely voice is the perfect one to correct them.” He saw Tess’ face go confused, and her horse slid a little ahead of his. He kicked himself for even blurting it out.
Siabrey’s right... he is indeed attracted to me, Tess sighed finally. I’m going to have to have a talk with him... it’ll take some word phrasing... for all his skill with a sword, our paladin is a softie. Don’t want to hurt his feelings when I tell him unequivocably... no.
Within the moment, Siabrey, with a sly looking smile, was beside the two. From her smirk, it was clear she heard his comment as well, and both Tess and Pellaron kicked themselves for riding this close even.
“So... Tess? Our paladin friend here has the Sune book, if you are interested!” she said slowly, with mocking seductiveness in her voice. Tess swung a foot out to kick her, but missed, while Pellaron’s face went a deep crimson. Indeed he had the book... he’d never read it since Siabrey had foisted it on him.
“She’s just like an annoying little sister!” Tess said, annoyed.
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