KotS humor: Spoilers

[PeelSeel2]

Ooh, I had no idea we were that far along in our relationship.
Does that mean I can touch your core rulebooks now?

Take this to a private thread please.

 

[-Avalon-]

Yeah...uhhh...

We definitely need a Non-Disclosure Agreement on THAT conversation

 

[AFGNCAAP]

Kalarel: So I want you to wait here in the Overtemple while I finish the ritual in the Undertemple.
Underpriest of Orcus: Yes, sir. When should the ritual be over?
Kalarel: In a few days. Then high priest Dunn will come and welcome Lord Orcus to the plane.
Underpriest: So I just watch over the Overtemple until Dunn arrives.
Kalarel: No, you stay in the Overtemple. You'll be over the Undertemple.
Underpriest: So I'm over the Undertemple? I thought I was the Underpriest?
Kalarel: You are the Underpriest. That's why you're under me.
Underpriest: And you're under Dunn?
Kalarel: Right.
Underpriest: If Dunn's over you, and you're in the Undertemple, isn't he in the Overtemple?
Kalarel: No. Dunn is coming over right now.
Underpriest: Got it. You're under Dunn, I'm under you. I'll be over you until you're done, and then Dunn will be over. At that point, the ritual will be over and we'll all go to the Undertemple to welcome our new overlords.
Kalarel: Exactly.

Roger.

What?

 

[Frostmarrow]

Roger Murdock: We have clearance Clarence.
Captain Oveur: Roger, Roger. What's our vector Victor?
Tower voice: Tower's radio clearance, over!
Captain Oveur: That's Clarence Oveur! Oveur.
Tower voice: Roger.
Roger Murdock: Huh?
Tower voice: Roger, over.
Roger Murdock: Huh?
Captain Oveur: Huh?

 

[Olgar Shiverstone]

Stop calling me Roger.

The real secret is that all of the treasure in KotS is in the form of SPAM.

 

[arwenarrowny]

The real secret is that all of the treasure in KotS is in the form of SPAM.

Surely you can't be serious!

 

[Bold or Stupid]

I think he his, better stop calling him Shirley, it may annoy him.

 

[Simplicity]

Kalarel: Alright, Thing, the adventurers are going to be here any minute. Now, I'm going to stand in this circle, and when they move in to attack me, you get an attack of opportunity against them.
Thing in the Portal: I don't get an opportunity attack when a creature moves into a threatened zone. Only when they leave the threatened zone.
Kalarel: You get an attack of opportunity whenever they leave or move through a threatened zone.
Thing in the Portal: It's called an opportunity attack and it's not for when they enter or shift through a threatened zone.
Kalarel: You've never been allowed an attack of opportunity against someone shifting in your threatened zone, and don't tell me what to call it.
Thing in the Portal: Well then don't start with your threatened zone s again. We both know what this is about. You want me to have an abortion.
Kalarel: It's really the only sensible thing to do. If you go to someone with enough Heal skill, there's no danger involved....

(Enter the PCs...)

 

[SkidAce]

wait...who's on first?

/nod Piratecat

 

[Blackeagle]

The real secret is that all of the treasure in KotS is in the form of SPAM.

But does it come with singing vikings?