[OT][Wife] My wife is going to kill me...

[mythago]

If you are spending $90+ at the bar plus going through 24 cans of beer EVERY WEEK, then I would bet you have another possible problem here, and it's not money.

As long as I'm in the armchair, I'm also guessing that you have a bad dynamic going on with your wife, where she is Responsible Mommy and you rebel against that by spending money, and then being in mock-terror about ooo, you're gonna be in so much trouble. Quit that. It's not good for either of you.

 

[Teflon Billy]

My Wonderful Ladyfriend and I were out at a local stoe and I saw a gaming supplement that I wanted....47 dollars. She asked if I was getting it, my answer was a firm "no".

When I came home, I logged onto Amazon.ca and found it, and another supplement for 58 dollars total.

She said I would be "Crazy to not get them at that price".

I'm in Loooooove

Anyway, the previous advie is all good advice. My marriage was driven to the rocks by (primarily) monetary issues. It can happen. It will happen incrememntally and it will wreck things.

 

[Kichwas]

Can anyone find me a good deal on the Kingdoms of Kalamar PHB?? I have to buy it before she checks the bank account in the morning and sees what I have done.

eBay.

After finally getting a group willing to let me run Kalamar, I filled out the entire collection of Kenzer Kalamar products through there over the last month, save for two modules and the DM-screen.

 

[Lazybones]

I'm fortunate now in that I earn enough to purchase most of what I want, but throughout my 20s in grad school I was seriously scraping bottom. I kept a spiral book with one page/month where I wrote down EVERYTHING I spent (even candy bars from vending machines), and marked "Self-Indulgent Purchases" (basically anything not really necessary) with a big asterisk. I'd keep a running total so I could see how far I was getting to my monthly budget (based on the income I expected for that month). I noticed that whenever I got off the system, I was always short of money.

I'm not saying you need to do anything so draconic, but a budget really helps you to keep a handle on what you're spending.

 

[ArielManx]

Each pay day, always, always, always pay all your bills FIRST, then look at what you have left over. If you only have $60 left until the next pay day, and the fridge is empty, that D&D suppliment won't look so danged tempting. Or at least it shouldn't.

Ditto to what several others have said about learning to cook and eating in instead of out. Want pizza? Red Baron's are $3-$5 from the grocery's freezer section and aren't even very greasy. But watch out for the frozen dinners - they seem cheap but they add up in price too (especially if you want a good one).

Stay away from things like the DVD Club and book clubs. It's so easy to send the card back, you forget that a bill comes with each package, and you suddenly owe them $100.

When I find things I want on eBay, before bidding I get out the checkbook and the file-folder we keep our bills in, add things up and see if we can afford it. Seriously. If we can, I decide my max bid and stick to it - if someone outbids me, so be it. If we can't afford it, I just shrug and never look at that auction again.

Getting into debt is easy. Getting out of it is hard.

There's also the issue of buying LOTS of things on the sly without your wife knowing, when YOU know bills are due soon, but I won't go there.

Ariel

 

[Greybar]

This is going to sound tough, but since it's here I'm hoping you want advice.

You and your wife are both employed? Budget to live on one of your salaries (the bigger one). Save the second salary in a liquid account like a money market until you have 6 months plus of expenses.

Given the current economy, you may be on one salary soon enough anyway. As others have mentioned, if you have a child (by choice or surprise) you'll find yourself there too.

You gotta be honest with your wife - money matters are the #1 reason for relationship trouble.

Good Luck!

john

 

[Tarrasque Wrangler]

Seriously it is not unlikely for me to spend 90 bucks on drinks at a bar every weekend.
-------
Actually, if we did end up setting up a budget. I'd be down with 2 12 packs of beer a week, + food, + gas. I really have no other expenses.

Uh, $90 a week at bars AND two 12-packs of beer every week?

Not to be judgmental, but it sounds like you've got a problem alright, and it's got nothing to do with Amazon.

 

[mythago]

As an aside, anyone who's not homeless or being spoiled by his/her parents has all kinds of expenses. If you're dumping all the housework on your wife, you may not think of them, but you certainly have more than food, gas and beer.

--Toilet paper
--Light bulbs
--Toothpaste
--Clothes when the ones you own wear out
--Electricity
--Climate control (that's heat and cooling)
--Garbage bags
--Dishwashing liquid

....you get the idea.

 

[Tarrasque Wrangler]

Cut out beer, and liquor in general. Once in awhile is OK, but if you are spending more than $50 a week on something you don't really need you have to give it a second thought. It's expensive, it's fattening, and it makes you sick if you drink too much of it. You could spend half that on donuts and get the same effect, but with a custard filling!

And before you ask, yes, games are more necessary than beer. RPGs are the anti-beer. They make you smarter and stimulate your imagination.

 

[Desdichado]

Yeah, neither my wife nor I drink, so at least we've never had that expense. We do like eating out more than we should, though. Especially when we were in grad school and not really making any money.